Rainbow Dash jolts back awake with a start, bolting up to her hooves on top of her bed. Her heart pounding in her chest, her head darts this way and that, as if looking for an unseen enemy, breathing heavily. It's just... My room. Just my room. Nothing is here. Rainbow Dash hisses at herself, irritated at her own reaction. So much for being a brave pony, here she is jumping at her own shadow just because she had a nightmare! "Who am I, Fluttershy?" Rainbow Dash mutters to herself sardonically.
Hopping off of her bed, she marches over to the window and looks outside. It is still dark, and she isn't entirely sure what time it is, but with adrenaline coursing through her veins there isn't any chance she is going back to bed. So instead, walking quietly, she slips out of her room and heads downstairs to the vacant living room. If she's stuck awake already, she might as well get breakfast out of the way.
The fillies cooking skills are not exactly spectacular, but she is at least able to stick a load of pasta in hot water and sandwich it between two halves of a potato. Hopping up on the chair and trying to keep from making too much noise to not wake up her parents, Rainbow Dash thinks back to the nightmare from last night. It was not the kind of dream she normally had, even if she was stressed out about something. She remembers feeling unsure about herself when she first started flight camp, despite her parents encouragement, but hadn't had any dream like the one from last night.
It just didn't seem right. Weren't dreams supposed to be something from her own subconscious? That dream certainly hadn't felt like something her mind would come up with. What would it even mean? It wasn't weird in the way that dreams normally were, either; No sudden scene changes, no inane tangents that didn't go anywhere. It felt more like a message being delivered concisely to her.
Ha! Even if it is, I'm not going to be that easily cowed! Rainbow Dash tells herself, even though in her heart of hearts she does in fact feel a bit cowed.
By the time she has finished her starchy sandwich, Rainbow's thoughts have moved on to the big decision ahead of her. Creepy dreams or not, she still has to make up her mind. Her parents wouldn't stop her either way, she is pretty sure, which means that the decision is ultimately in her hooves.
A part of her feels humbled, that the monarch of Equestria had flown all the way out here just to see her. How could she turn down such an offer? Yet, another part- the spunky, rebellious part- feels almost angry. She had just made her dream, just proven she could do it, and here the princess came in telling her she should do something completely different!
That's ridiculous. Even Rainbow Dash knew that. They have no idea what your dreams are, they're the princess of all Equestria for heavens sake. You should feel honored they took the time to come all the way out here just for you.
Her thoughts continue circling that way until, before she knows it, the sun rises and her mother comes downstairs. "Honey? What are you doing up so early?" It is, thankfully, not a flight camp day, and normally Rainbow Dash would have been sleeping in late. The dark circles under the pegasus' eyes give away that she had not gotten a full night of sleep.
"Oh, hey, mom." Rainbow Dash shrugs. "Just felt like it, I guess." No way I'm admitting I had a nightmare. Rainbow Dash can hear the warble in her own voice, but hopes it isn't too recognizable to her mother.
Windy Whistles walks up by her side and sits down next to her, wrapping a wing around her daughter. "What's going on, Dashie? I would have thought you'd be over the moon, but instead I don't know if I've ever seen you so down. Do you want to talk about it?"
Rainbow Dash hops off the chair she was on and glances back at her mother, shaking her head furiously. The last thing she wants is a mushy heart-to-heart about her feelings, she would figure this out on her own just like everything. "I'm heading over to my friends." Rainbow Dash announces, trotting towards the door.
"Don't you want breakfast first?" Her mother calls after her, so Rainbow Dash glances back and shakes her head again. "I'm good. I already ate."
Rainbow Dash strolls lackadaisically through Cloudsdale, the light from the morning sun still somewhat dim as it peaks over the horizon. Much of the land below is still cloaked in shadow, but the flying city is always first exposed to the sun. As Rainbow Dash reaches the edge of the particular cloud layer her house is on, she gently lifts up into the air. The cloud city is mostly calm, except...
Rainbow Dash shades her eyes with her hoof while looking up towards the upper levels, and in particular the Wonderbolts academy. As every day, the Wonderbolts are already out and about, barely visible against the brightening sky beyond, yet unmistakable as anypony else. After all, who else in cloudsdale would be doing a corkscrew dive at high speeds this early in the morning?
Rainbow Dash closes her eyes, hovering in place, and imagines herself up there with them, wearing the blue-and-yellow uniform and leading the aerobatics squad in flight. She knew she could do it, knew she could reach that. It's so easy for her to imagine, she can practically see herself diving and soaring through the air with them.
But then, as Rainbow Dash opens her eyes again, she finds herself gazing the other direction. Far to the west, where Canterlot is just barely visible in the distance. She had seen the city from a distance many times of course, as Cloudsdale passed above it occasionally as part of its weather routine. But try as she might, she can't imagine walking its streets, or soaring through its skies. She can't imagine what it would be like to live there. It was an unknown world, beyond her experience; She'd never even touched the ground below her flying home before.
Rainbow Dash snarls to herself. So what if it's unknown? Are you some kind of coward? Rainbow Dash scowls and beats her wings in flight, heading for the training fields, or more accurately, the dormitories. Her friends would be there, since they aren't native to the cloud city. On the way, her mind drifts back to the distant mountain city to the west of Cloudsdale. What would life be like if she were to go there? How would it change the course of her life? The city was the least of uncertainties that would await her. Being the personal pupil of the Sun Princess both sounds too good to be true, and an utterly terrifying prospect at the same time.
No, you've always wanted everypony to see what you can do. This isn't like you. Rainbow Dash shakes her head. Thinking this hard about something is a decidedly unfamiliar experience and, if you asked her, unwelcome. Besides, she had basically arrived at her destination now. The dormitory isn't active, given that Flight Camp is closed today, but Rainbow Dash feels confident at least Cloudkicker would be up. The filly came from a military family and had a strict policy of waking up every day at the crack of dawn drilled into her from a young age. Gilda would likely be up too, something about Griffin's having slightly different sleep patterns.
So it isn't a surprise when Rainbow Dash spots Cloudkicker in the yard doing wing-ups and Gilda lazing around on a cloud out in front, along with a couple of other colts. Gilda looks up at Dash with some surprise as she glides to a halt nearby. "Didn't expect to see you around today. Certainly not this early." Gilda remarks. "Did you really turn down the princess?" She sounds almost incredulous.
Rainbow Dash shakes her head. "No, she just had to go back to Canterlot. She said I can have as much time as I want to think it over. I don't... Know what I'm going to do." Rainbow Dash states, rubbing one of her forelegs with the other anxiously. She almost mentions the dream she had, but quickly decides not to; A cool pegasus like her isn't supposed to have nightmares.
Cloudkicker jumps up as she finishes her wing-ups, stretching out sore wings as she trots over to join her two friends. "You know, my family lives in Canterlot. We'd probably see eachother more, if you went there."
Meanwhile, Gilda scoffs. "I'm surprised you didn't take them up on the offer already, but if you don't want to go you should just tell the princess to stuff it." Gilda's beak makes a shape that could generously be described as a smirk, though pony expressions didn't really map very well onto griffins. "I still can't believe you talked to them like that. You're lucky they didn't throw you in jail, if you act like that all the time its probably safer if you stay far away."
"Who cares whats safer?" Rainbow Dash asks sardonically, shaking her head. "I just dunno what I want to do yet. When they visited yesterday, Celestia said if I went with them I'd probably never become a Wonderbolt. I just made that dream and now..." Rainbow Dash trails off.
"Ha, then just don't go! Simple as that. Wonderbolts is your dream, nopony has the right to take that away from you. Isn't that right, Dash?" Gilda advises.
Rainbow Dash is silent for a long moment, thinking back to her dream. In her minds eye, she sees the painting of Shadowkicker again, lying in a pool of their own blood. But dead or not, the pony was a legend, exceeding the reputation of even the most talented wonderbolt. Flying is what I do. Should I just stick in my lane? Rainbow Dash wonders, frowning. But... If I can be even more than that, reach even higher pinnacles than I ever dreamt possible... After a long moment, Rainbow Dash sighs and looks up. "Hey, Gilda? Is it alright if I talk to Cloudkicker alone for a minute?"
The griffin looks properly miffed at the question, but just rolls her eyes. "Pfft, whatever. Just tell me whenever you've made up your mind." The griffin stalks off, looking to be somewhat insulted by the question.
Rainbow Dash walks over to the edge of the cloud and sits down, and Cloudkicker joins her, sitting beside her with a frown. "What is it, Dash? Why don't you want Gilda here?"
Rainbow Dash takes a deep breathe. I know its embarrassing but, Shadowkicker is her ancestor! I think I should tell her. "I... had a nightmare, last night." Rainbow Dash confesses. "N-not that I was scared!" She hastily adds. "But... I saw two stained glass portraits. There was this voice threatening me, trying to get me to stay in Cloudsdale, and I saw... Shadowkicker, lying bleeding on the ground." Rainbow Dash explains, shaking her head. "I don't have dreams like that, and I don't know what it means."
Cloudkicker waves her legs back and forth, and looks up, oddly pensive. "I've... had a few dreams like that before, too. It runs in the family." She points up at the sky. "My grandfather says bad dreams like that come from the moon, and only happen when there's a full moon out." Cloudkicker explains, triggering a surprised look from Rainbow Dash.
"Seriously? It's not just me?" Rainbow Dash asks, incredulously, and Cloudkicker shakes her head.
"I'm afraid not. I've... I've had dreams where I saw Shadowkicker, too. Always hurt or dying." Cloudkicker looks melancholic, before standing up. "You sure you aren't a kicker, too? Maybe somepony just broke the chain of names at some point."
Rainbow Dash shrugs. Genealogy is well outside of her area of expertise. She groans and leans back, falling onto the fluffy clouds and staring up into the sky. "I don't even know what exactly would be waiting for me in Canterlot. I mean, I've never even been on the ground before, or seen an earth pony! How am i supposed to..." Rainbow Dash sighs and interrupts herself. "But from what the princess said the other day, it sounded like they'd want to teach me how to fight and survive. Maybe they think I could be a good soldier or something. It feels... It feels like the world is telling me I could be like Shadowkicker."
Cloudkicker pauses for a long moment, frowning. "That's what my folks want from me. But is that what you want?" Cloudkicker asks. "I mean, you don't need to live up to anypony's expectations, you're just doing what you want. Right?" She hesitates again. "You know it won't be easy if that's what you want to do. Trust me, I would know."
Rainbow Dash grows distant for a bit, staring up into nothing particular. "I just thought I should talk to you about it." Rainbow Dash gives Cloudkicker a sidelong glance. A part of her wants to thank Cloudkicker, tell her she's a good friend. But a larger part hates all that mushy stuff, and refuses to say any such thing. So instead, Rainbow Dash clambers up to her feet and spreads her wings. "Well, I'm going to take a flight around, try to clear my head."
Cloudkicker frowns slightly, looking concerned for her friend. But just like Dash, she keeps those 'mushy' thoughts inside, leaving Rainbow Dash to take off.
Rainbow doesn't know where she's going, but soon enough finds herself gliding above the mid-layer of clouds, recognizing the houses of other pegasi. Most of these, she isn't on particularly good terms with; Her tendency to get into fights and competitions meant most other pegasi around her had a grudge against her, with the only ones she had formed a positive relationship coming from out of town.
But there is one exception, a pegasi of such non-competitive nature that Dash's string of showing off and challenges hadn't hurt her relationship with them one bit. One who is presently watering the small cloud garden in front of her house, and Rainbow Dash swoops down to join her.
"Eek!" Fluttershy jumps as Rainbow Dash lands on all fours on the clouds in front of her. "Oh! Rainbow!" Fluttershy's voice, though surprised and perhaps scared, is just as soft and quiet as ever.
"Sorry, Flutters, didn't mean to scare ya." Rainbow Dash says. Suddenly remembering what had even triggered the race the other day, Rainbow Dash cocks her head at Fluttershy curiously. "Did those colts give you any more trouble?"
"Oh, no, I haven't seen them around." Fluttershy announces. "Of course, I only got home late last night, so I haven't had much time to."
Rainbow Dash blinks. "Huh? Why were you gone?" Something in the back of her mind clicks, and she furrows her brow. "That's right, I guess I didn't see you around yesterday after the race. What happened?"
"Oh, um, well you see, after you took off I fell off the cloud, but some sweet butterflies caught me before I could hit the ground." Fluttershy explains, and Rainbow Dash blanches.
"Wh-what? You almost died?" Rainbow Dash's voice raises an octave, leaving Fluttershy to cringe and cower before the suddenly increased volume, and Rainbow Dash quickly backtracks. "I-I mean... Are you ok?" The filly tries to keep her voice as mellow as possible to comfort the easily startled pegasus.
"Oh, yes. I met all kinds of adorable little woodland critters, and I even got my cutie mark!" Fluttershy exclaims, or at least, comes as close to explaining as the shy yellow pegasus could, turning sideways to show off the three butterflies that now adorn her flank.
Rainbow Dash takes the opportunity to turn her own self sideways and show off the prismatic bolt of lightning and stormcloud on her own. "No way, me too!" She cheers as quietly as she can manage. "That means the two of us are the only ones in our class to have our cutie marks! Lets see 'em try and make fun of us now!" Rainbow Dash proclaims confidently, before her smile fades a little. "Did you hear about what happened after you left?"
Fluttershy shakes her head, and Rainbow Dash explains the events of the previous day- The Sonic Rainboom, how Princess Celestia herself had arrived in Cloudsdale, as Fluttershy looks on in increasing degrees of skepticism.
"Oh my, that certainly is quite the story..." Fluttershy states, looking highly unconvinced, while Rainbow Dash narrows her eyes.
"What are you tryna say? You calling me a liar?" Rainbow Dash demands, triggering the already nervous Fluttershy to duck behind some foliage.
"N-no!" She stammers out, in an incredibly quiet tone that Rainbow can barely hear. "J-just that you like to exaggerate sometimes, th-thats all."
Rainbow Dash grunts, offended. How could her longtime friend think she was lying to her? Sure, the story sounds pretty far fetched but... Rainbow Dash wouldn't make up stories, she was way too cool to need to do that! The truth is already plenty awesome without any exaggeration needed.
“Well, whatever. The point is, I have to decide what I’m going to do now.” Rainbow Dash shrugs off Fluttershy’s disbelief. “Celestia invited me to Canterlot, but said if I go I probably won’t ever become a Wonderbolt. I still don’t know what I’m going to do.” Rainbow Dash feels a little more comfortable talking about this with Fluttershy, compared to Cloudkicker or Gilda she doesn’t feel as much need to posture or keep cool. Though, that is counterbalanced by her continued offense at Fluttershy’s apparent distrust.
“Well, if you really were invited to Canterlot, I don’t think I would want to go.” Fluttershy says uncertainly, shivering in imagined discomfort. “Too many ponies. All staring at you.” Fluttershy gulps nervously, apparently finding the thought alone disquieting. “Are you sure you’d be able to handle that much pressure? I mean, if it really was the princess asking you, that’s alot of expectations to handle.”
“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, ‘Shy.” Rainbow Dash replies dryly, before zipping up into the air and puffing out her chest. “I’m awesome, I can handle whatever the world throws at me!” Even if something doesn’t want me to. Rainbow Dash finds the last thought coming to mind inadvertently, remembering her dream from the previous night.
“Well, if you’re sure about that.” Fluttershy replies meekly. “I’m just telling you what I would do.” Fluttershy shrinks away, and Rainbow Dash tries to resist frowning in response. Fluttershy’s feelings are quite delicate, and she doesn’t want to give her the impression she was upset at her, even if she does feel a little insulted by the implication that she couldn’t handle the pressure.
“Well. I’m going to go back to thinking things over.” Rainbow Dash sighs. “Oh, and by the way... Proof!” Rainbow Dash triumphantly shows off the sigil that had been given to her by Princess Celestia.
Fluttershy’s eyes widen in shock. “T-T-The royal seal! Y-Y-You really did see the princess!” Fluttershy shudders on her feet, while Rainbow Dash looks on smugly.
“Ha, I told you!” Rainbow Dash smirks, while Fluttershy staggers in place. “...Um, Flutters, you ok?” Rainbow Dash’s pride is quickly overtaken by concern as Fluttershy wobbles, and the cyan pegasus quickly swoops down to support Fluttershy, as she collapses, fainted on the spot.
“F-Fluttershy! Fluttershy, are you alright?” Rainbow Dash yelps in shock, holding Fluttershy’s weight up. At least the cloud cover is a suitably comfortable place to collapse suddenly.
After making sure Fluttershy was ok- She woke up just a minute or so after fainting- Rainbow Dash takes off again. She always thinks better when flying, and now is no exception. If she is making such a major decision, she wants to be in the best possible headspace to do so.
As she flies, she keeps thinking of more and more reasons she should stay in Cloudsdale. Not only is this where the Wonderbolts are, but also her parents, and Fluttershy too. Who knew who would be there, if she went to Canterlot? Sure, Cloudkicker lived there most of the time, but she hadn’t known that pegasus for that long, only having met her a few months ago when flight camp started. Canterlot is a complete unknown to a pegasus who has always lived among the clouds. And to boot, even her dreams warned her away from it.
And yet, despite all of that... The distant city to the west feels increasingly more and more alluring. Maybe it's the fear itself; The allure of proving to herself that she wasn’t so easily cowed, that she can reach greater heights than she had ever dreamt of. That she was awesome at everything, not just flight, that she could carve out a new destiny for herself.
Just about when she had finished a single lap around the entire city of Cloudsdale, Rainbow Dash realizes with a start that she had made up her mind without even realizing it. As much as she had longed to be a Wonderbolt, to become the pinnacle of flying athleticism, this new possibility is just too alluring to let up. If she turned her back on it, she would spend the rest of her life wondering what she could have been, had she been brave enough to dive into the unknown, to embark on a new path in life she had never considered before. And just like that... Her mind is settled.
Overthinking things isn't my style. I’ve decided what I want, it’s as simple as that. Rainbow Dash tells herself, her speed quickening as she flies back towards home. The trepidation that had filled her heart since the Princesses visit finally begins to give way to the excitement of a new horizon ahead of her.
What will it be like? Though Rainbow Dash had asked herself that question many times since the previous night, the meaning is different this time. It isn’t a statement of fear or uncertainty, but one of eager anticipation, as Rainbow Dash takes another step towards her home with a new sense of resolve and certainty.