//------------------------------// // Introduction // Story: All that Glitters. (EAW) // by LunarReaper //------------------------------// Amidst the varied provinces of the Griffonian Empire there rests a city built on a hill. A city on a hill in a province surrounded by mountains. A province that spends half the year buried under snow and the other half drowned under pissing rain and flooding (one can assume from all the melting snow). Its industry is dire, its farming leaves something to be desired and its military is split between various knightly orders. Knightly orders that are constantly at odds with one another to an extent that most spend more time bickering than doing their jobs. Banditry is rather rife in this province and has become one of it unoffical major exports (they ran out of peasents to steal from). One might say it is a miserable place because of those facts. And one would be right. But I digress... where was I? Ahhh! So there rests a city on a hill, in a province that has seen better days. Within that city lies the meat of this matter, the big issue, the chain holding it all down and other such sayings. The meat of the matter is the result of tragedy, manipulation and greed but I could rant all day about those things (I have before). The primary issue is that of a young woman (though I believe the term is hen), she is the ruler of this province and due to those previously mentioned things... she is uhhh (Me trying to say this nicely). Fuck it. She's stark raving mental. The kind of mental that would get her chucked in a loony bin for the rest of her life. The type of mental derived from trauma and particularly sinister grooming that left her completely detatched from reality. At this point I don't even think electro therepy could do much to wipe the various obsessions and mad tics that haunt her. She is feared and hated, one could find more love for the Riverponies across the reich than they could for her in her own province. She is Diellza Von Katerinburg, the Mad Princess of Katerin and at this point you must be wondering why I just explaned this all to you (However briefly)? Don't worry I'm getting to that bit just let me go through the rigamarol once again and then we can finally get to the point of this matter. Now I have told you of this province and of Diellza with little tidbits of the various miscreants who surround her and now I must tell you of me. You see within the city of Katerinburg there sits a gift in the Mad Princesses bedroom, a gift sent by a tom in another province. Within this city upon a hill, resting firmly against the Mad Princesses feathered bosom is a skull. Specifically a unicorn skull. A unicorn skull that is perfectly polished and decorated (and no doubt devilishly handsome), allowing its bone coloured splendour to light up any room it enters. It is a unicorn skull that under normal circumstances would be doing nothing and yet on that fateful night as the Princess snored and grumbled about unruly peasents, it decided to do something different. Its eye's decided to glow gold for some innane and unknown reason. You might be wondering what that has to do with me or anything at all and for that I believe introductions are in order. Hi, I'm Glitterhoof and I am a talking magical unicorn skull. I am also the Political advisor to Princess Diellza von Katerinburg. Though I might also be her lover/rival/husband and or enemy depending on what mood she is in. Really I don't know what we are but one thing I do know is that she is my way of staying alive and I'll be damned if I can't help her just a little bit before whatever this is comes to an end. One other thing I now know is that the golden glowing eye's can't exactly be turned off or down and given my lover/rival/wife and or enemy is currently staring at me I believe there is some explaining to be done. Now one wonders where my lover will go with her questioning? Will my rival decide that a talking Glitterhoof is unfeasible? Will my dearest and most stunning wife spurn me for my new linguistic ability or will my most deplorable enemy finally decide that enough is enough and smite me where I si- "Glitterhoof, shudup Im tryna sleep" She mumbles grumpily before shutting her gorgeous green eyes. She's blushing now I can see it on her dark feathers and I can't help but be- - I am now on the floor. You know what Diellza I'll be quiet for now, just because you asked so nicely. Enjoy your beauty sleep my beautiful catbirb (you do not need it). And now how the hell do I get to sleep? Do I just sit here and stare into nothingness until the darkness returns? Perhaps I can only sleep by your side Diellza or perhaps I cannot sleep at all. What a horrifying thought. If one can't sleep one can't dream and if one can't dream how can a dream come true? What hell have I arrived in, how can my dream of being a professional tapdancer ever flourish like this? And how can that dream ever be relised If I do not sleep. I must know the answer to these questions. I will know the answer to these questions, with Borea's as my witness I will- oh hello Diellza how was your sleep? Ah quite right this box is exactly my size, its as If it was made for me. Imagine that my dear, ohhh it even has a pillow! How exciting! Does the lid come as standard as well or did you have it specially fitted for me? Ah sweet darkness how I have missed you. Though it is rather tight isn't it? Holy Grover this pillow isn't as comfy as it looks... the darkness doesn't seem so comforting anymore. Diellza my dear I don't think I like this. Diellza!? Diellza, are you awake my most hated enemy? Oh crumbs.