So, Twi—is it cool if I call you Twi? “Twilight” is too fancy. It makes me uncomfortable just hearing it, the same way I feel every time I see fashion models onstage. You’d never catch Vinyl Scratch wearing clothes like that, and I’m sure glad my old mare didn’t name me Twilight. No offense.
Yeah, you know all about me. Vinyl Scratch, DJ extraordinaire. I was honored when you asked me to perform in the concert you were planning for Princess Celestia. I mean, she’s in charge of the sun. That’s pretty dang serious, you know?
You can bet your books I was upset to stroll into the living room on the morning before the concert and find somepony had busted up Trib. That’s my music console, by the way. Tribulation, or Trib for short. Old Trib and I have had some crazy times together, and it cut me up to find somepony had torn off a panel, pulled some wires and made a mess of the circuit board.
I guess whatever pony wrecked Trib came in through the living room window. It was smashed. Glass everywhere. And there was something else mixed in with the glass. Splinters of metal. I can’t even call them splinters. They were splinters of splinters: tiny shards of steel. I was wondering what the hay they were when I noticed a cabinet was open and realized where its lock had gone.
It wasn’t just any cabinet. It was the cabinet, where Octy—Octavia, I mean—keeps her instruments, including her bass. She loves that bass. Dang, it’s almost creepy how much she loves that thing. When I saw the cabinet open and its lock scattered in little pieces over the carpet, I had a really bad feeling.
Octy came downstairs minutes later. The look on her face was awful, Twi. She looked like somepony had died. After staring for a second, she ransacked the cabinet and found her bass. It was busted just as bad as my console. The stick thingy—you know, what she drags across the strings to make music—was broken, and the strings were cut. Overall, the instrument was in pretty bad shape.
As much as I wanted to make a joke about “dropping the bass,” I decided it probably wasn’t the best time.
The whole thing was a shock, but I figured it would be easy to fix. I had enough cash on hoof to get Trib fixed, and I thought Octy would have enough bits to get her bass repaired. She comes from a rich family. I’ve also heard rumors she had ties to the Canterlot mob in her younger days. Either way, I assumed she was loaded.
Turns out she had just bought the house we live in and didn’t have a bit left over.
Now, Twi, our house is pretty much the nicest place ever. Have you seen the mansion at the end of Oat Avenue? The one with the rose garden and ivy climbing up the walls? That’s us, baby. We’ve got five bedrooms and a hot tub and even a basement with soundproofing where I can play my music loud. The furniture is made of shiny wood. There’s a statue of that wacky Discord guy in the foyer. (I think it’s just a statue.) You could sleep on the carpet, it’s so plush. Seriously, this house is glorious.
In fact, it’s a little too glorious for a pony like me. I figured Octy would have the same idea, so I made the first move.
“I’ll be moving out then, Octy,” I said, trying to sound cheerful. “I’m no freeloader. The Scratches earn their living fair and square.”
“You shall stay,” she said, and then began to cry. “You are a dear friend, Vinyl, despite your… unusual habits.”
Octy is good with words. I’m not. I still can’t find words to describe how awesome it is that Octy is letting me stay in her house, and I’ve been trying for hours. At the time, after struggling to speak for a minute, all I could manage was, “I’m not good at saying thanks, but, um, thanks, Octy. You the best. Go get some rest. I’ll think of something.”
She went upstairs, and I realized what I needed to do.
To Tartarus with Trib.
Octy’s bass needed fixing, and never mind the cost.
After cleaning up the living room and taping a Wonderbolts poster over the busted window, I took the bass to the shop. It took an hour and about a million bits, but I got it repaired and took it back to the house.
I stood in the rose garden, reluctant to go inside. You see, Twi, I don’t like mushy, sentimental stuff. It’s hard enough to say stuff like “Thank you.” Hearing it from other ponies is even worse. I’m not sure how long I waited, clutching the bass and listening to bees hum through the roses, but it was a pretty long time.
A pony came to the front door. “Hey you,” I said. “Yeah, you. Brown guy with the hourglass Cutie Mark.”
“Good day,” he replied. He sounded foreign.
“You’re visiting Octy?”
He chuckled. “If by ‘Octy’ you mean Ms. Octavia, I am.”
“Give her the bass in this bag,” I said, holding it out.
The pony took the bag, peered inside and declared, “A beautiful instrument. Ms. Octavia asked you to have it tuned, I presume.”
“The bass was busted, actually. I just paid to have it fixed.”
The pony whistled. “It’s lucky that you repaired it in time for the concert. I’d better check on your console while I’m here.”
“Somepony messed with it,” I mumbled, fixing my gaze on a rosebush. “It’s not working.”
“Do you mind if I take a look at it?”
“Knock yourself out,” I replied, staring at the bush and wishing the brown pony would stop asking questions.
“Very good,” he said. “I’m the Doctor, by the way. You must be Ms. Scratch.”
That did it.
Turning away from the rosebush, I frowned at the Doctor and growled, “Don’t ever call me that again. Seriously, it’s ‘Vinyl’ or ‘Scratch’ or ‘Vinyl Scratch.’ Now get in there and give Octy her bass. One more thing. Don’t tell her it’s from me. If she asks, change the subject. Talk about the Wonderbolts poster in the living room or something. Got that, Doc?”
The Doctor nodded, took the bass and entered the house. He came out smiling a few minutes later. “The coast is clear,” he said, and winked. “You’re quite a heroine, Scratch. Ms. Octavia is happy to have her bass again. More to the point, you’ve helped save Equestria.”
“I did what?”
“Well,” said the Doctor pensively, “you’ve helped save three-quarters of it. Good day, Scratch.”
The Doctor trotted off, leaving me with absolutely no idea of what the hay he meant. I helped save Equestria… by fixing Octy’s bass? Weird, man. And what was with the three-quarters thing? Seriously, I’m beginning to wonder about that Doctor pony. I bet he doesn’t even have a degree.
The Doctor turned the corner at the end of the avenue and disappeared from view. There was no point in waiting outside any longer. I swallowed hard, went inside and found Octy hugging her bass. I told you it was creepy how much she loves that thing.
“Dude, you fixed your bass!” I said, grinning at Octy. “Tell me you didn’t sell the house to pay for it.”
“I did nothing of the kind,” she said. Her eyes had lit up. “That pony, the Doctor, gave it to me. I do not even know how he obtained it, let alone repaired it.”
“That’s sweet,” I said. “Totally sweet! Now you can perform tonight at the concert.”
“Vinyl, try out your console. The Doctor hinted it might be working again.”
My heart sank. Trib was still broke, I was sure. The broken panel was lying on the floor where I left it, and a few wires dangled out of the hole it left behind. Old Trib was definitely busted. I turned it on anyway and began playing with the controls.
Then the most awesome thing in the history of history happened.
Trib shuddered once and began to wub. I cranked the volume and prepared for action.
Then I heard somepony say very faintly, “Turn it off!”
Reluctantly, I shut off Trib. “Working,” I said, grinning.
“Kindly refrain from turning it on again,” said Octy. “I just bought this house, and I do not want you wubbing it down.”
We spent the afternoon practicing a duet. The Doctor had apparently told Octy that she and I had to play one at the concert. The fate of Equestria depended on it or something. I wasn’t about to argue.
The rest is history. Octy and I went to town hall that night for the concert. The place was totally decked out. Didn’t your friend Rarity handle the decorations? The ribbons and banners and stuff were pretty dang fabulous. The hall was packed. Everypony in Equestria was there, or that’s how it looked from up on stage. I played my duet with Octy. Princess Celestia loved it.
Everything was awesome until the fire happened.