The Mystery of the Old Ponyville Time Capsule

by GrangeDisplay

Excusable Under Certain Circumstances

It turns out that running an interrogation on a nurse while she is on her shift is not a viable idea, even if it is a royal investigation. Starlight had to admit that their questioning skills could have been a little more efficient and structured, but they were working under a lot of pressure. Rumors regarding strange ponies hanging in the shadows and in alleyways had been spreading throughout Ponyville. It was easy to spot a new face in a small town, and Starlight was starting to notice a lot of new faces lingering in the corner of her eye. It seemed that a new trend of dark trench coats, fedoras, and cigars was taking Ponyville by storm, and Starlight knew that something had to be done. 

Nurse Redheart’s irritated and sparse testimony provided an adequate alibi. The nurse had asserted that she did not know a Cloudy Whistles and her body language suggested no recognition with a subdued reaction to the name. When asked her opinion on fireworks, Redheart was clearly unamused, they prodded her a little more on the matter and received a begrudging, “they’re abysmal.”

Apparently, hospitalization spikes whenever celebrations involving fireworks occur, leading to long days for many healthcare workers. The nurse was even kind enough to recall, in gruesome detail, the various firework related injuries that she had seen over the years. Vague stories about severe burns, scorched retinas, and fractured forehooves. It lasted a solid thirty minutes and it thoroughly grossed out the unicorns, nearly convincing them to leave then and there, but Trixie overcame her nausea and pushed on.

The magician inquired about Nurse Redheart’s whereabouts several years ago. According to Redheart, she had worked at the hospital for some time, but any chemical knowledge that she had was concentrated on its medical application. During the timeframe, she had been working at Ponyville General, completing her residency after her graduation. She insisted that she was exceedingly busy during that period, much like how she was busy at the moment. Trixie and Starlight finally took the hint and left the poor nurse to do her work undisturbed. They discussed how they might improve on their interrogation skills as they headed to the vet.

Birds flew overhead, squirrels climbed the cabinets, and a goat hopped on the counters while Dr. Fauna instructed her guest to get comfortable. They set up chairs around the doctor’s inspection table and got to work. Trixie was pleased to see that Dr. Fauna was much more open to interrogation and ran through the most important talking points. 

“The Great and Powerful Trixie has a series of questions to ask on behalf of your Princess, Twilight Sparkle.” she proclaimed pompously as she pulled out a notepad. 

Dr. Fauna let out a small, “oh,” but was not deterred by the announcement. She brushed beaver’s fur off of her lab coat. “Princess Twilight needs to ask me questions? Very well, go ahead, I’m happy to help.” 

Starlight gave the doctor a thank you before Trixie huffed and began her questioning. “Tell me, 'Dr. Fauna', if that even is your name, what do you think when you hear the name Cloudy Whistles?” 

“Cloudy Whistles?” Dr. Fauna repeated, trying to see if saying it out loud might jog her memory. “Are we talking about a pet/critter or a pony/creature?” 

“We are discussing a pony/creature,” Trixie confirmed haughtily, scribbling down a series of incoherent notes on her notepad. 

The veterinarian hummed as she thought it over. “I don’t believe that I know a Cloudy Whistles. I’m sorry.” 

“No, no it’s okay. Thank you for answering truthfully, that's all that matters. Right, Trixie?” Starlight assured before turning to Trixie and trying to encourage a warmer approach. The doctor’s response sounded genuine, meaning that it was best to move on.

Trixie scoffed and sighed. “Yes, it is not an issue. Thank you, Dr. Fauna. Now, it’s time for Trixie’s next question. What is your opinion on fireworks?” 

Dr. Fauna gave them an odd look, which the unicorns took note of. She scratched the back of her head. “Fireworks? That’s…an interesting question. Fireworks can be a nice spectacle from time to time. I used to look forward to seeing them whenever big events occurred. However, they can be loud and jarring, which terrifies critters. I don’t really like them as much because of that.” 

Starlight could tell that Trixie’s radar was going off the chart. The magician scrutinized Dr. Fauna and went off script. “So, if you could invent a firecracker, you would create one that was quieter and less frightening to animals. Maybe even ones that were more…environmentally friendly?” 

Dr. Fauna nodded slowly. “I suppose so.” 

There was silence as Dr. Fauna’s eyes grew wide. It was a strong reaction to something that Starlight couldn’t understand, but Trixie knew exactly what was happening. The doctor rushed to add more to her confession. 

“T-though I don’t know the first thing about firecrackers.” she stuttered in vain.

Trixie was out of her seat in seconds, allowing the chair to tip over as she pointed an accusing hoof at the doctor. “You don’t? Is that what you want us to believe!”

“Yes! Because that is the truth, I swear it!... Are you two looking into that whole firework mess from a few years ago? I had and have nothing to do with that!” Dr. Fauna pleaded, the animals in the room scattered due to the sudden commotion. 

Starlight had no idea what was happening. Did Trixie actually stumble upon something? A part of her wanted to interject but the other part wanted to see what would happen next. She sat back and watched Trixie work.

“Oh, so you admit that you know about the firework situation?” 

“Of course I know about the firework situation, everypony who lived here at the time knows about the firework situation! Fillies and colts were running around the streets throwing cherry bombs for months! And nopony could figure out where they were coming from. My mentor at the time had to lobby Mayor Mare to do something before any animal got hurt.” Dr. Fauna insisted with a hoof to her chest. 

“Did this, ‘Mayor Mare,’ carry out an investigation on the matter?” Trixie rolled her r’s as she began to circle the room.

Dr. Fauna looked around suspiciously and spoke quietly. “I believe that she did. The details were kinda kept under wraps, but the whole situation was pinned on this underground syndicate from out-of-town.” 

“An underground syndicate you say? The Great and Powerful Trixie wonders how an out-of-towner could have infiltrated Ponyville without being noticed. Wouldn’t somepony notice their foal conversing with a strange pony?” 

Starlight's mouth hung open at Trixie’s reasoning. Things were actually coming together for the first time. She was genuinely impressed by her friend’s interrogation.

Dr. Fauna’s eyes darted around the room; she was progressively becoming more nervous with each question. “I don’t know. I don’t know! This all happened years ago and I had little to no relation with it. I was completely swamped with my apprenticeship at the time, and I was way out of the impacted age range. Surely Princess Twilight doesn’t suspect me! I don’t know why this is happening. Please, is there anything I can do to convince you that I am not the culprit?” 

The unicorns exchanged a glance as they thought it over. Trixie stroked her non-existent beard; she knew that she had this pony in the palm of her hoof. She clicked her tongue and flipped her mane to the side. 

“If Trixie is to believe that you are innocent, she must be provided with sufficient information. We need names. Ponies that are much more deserving of a closer inspection than you are.” 

The doctor shivered as she covered her muzzle with a hoof. “I…I’m not so sure. I was new to town at the time, I didn’t know many ponies… Perhaps you should talk to the mayor or maybe Pinkie…she knows everypony.” 

A horde of squirrels skittered across the floor as Trixie studied Dr. Fauna with a neutral expression. “We have already spoken to both. Trixie wonders if there is anything else that Dr. Fauna could tell us. Would you consider Dr. Hooves a quality culprit?” 

“Y-you know, I-I think I would.” Dr. Fauna smiled with uncertainty. “If I recall correctly, he used to work at this toy shop back then. I used to purchase toys for the animals, and foals would always be hanging around. Maybe that’s how they got the cherry bombs? He also… debuted these flameless fireworks at Cranky’s wedding!” The veterinarian jumped up as she proclaimed her final point. 

When Trixie didn’t react right away, Dr. Fauna’s ears folded against her head in fear. Her mind raced, but she had nothing else to contribute. She looked at the continually silent Starlight with pleading eyes. 

“The information given reinforces our suspicions. On behalf of Twilight Sparkle, I, the Great and Powerful Trixie Lulamoon, release you from this interrogation. You may return to your normal duties, but always be prepared to undergo further questioning. Tell nopony of this conversation and stay within the town’s perimeters until further notice.” Trixie announced, clicking her pen closed and putting her notepad away. 

The doctor exhaled as the unicorns got up to leave. Trixie gave her one last intimidating look before closing the door. 

It wasn’t until there was a good distance between them and the vets that Starlight spoke up. 

“Trixie, that was amazing! I mean, we didn’t exactly get a new suspect, but we did get some helpful information.” 

“Well of course! What do expect from the Great and Powerful Trixie’s Great and Powerful interrogation skills. I knew that we had her as soon as she mentioned making quieter fireworks. 

Starlight perked up as she remembered the initial cause of her confusion throughout the conversation. “Why was the sound of firecrackers so important, Trixie? Why did she react so strongly to that?”

“It’s because Al Capony’s firecrackers were revolutionary. As Trixie has said in the past, they were consistently good. Reliable and efficient. But they were also quiet. Not completely silent, but significantly quieter than their competitors and cleaner environmentally. Al maintained vibrant, bombastic, and explosively brilliant fireworks while stifling the noise. He knew exactly what ponies wanted. He easily could have made his business legitimate and made millions.” 

“Then why didn’t he? Why go underground when your product is good enough to be mainstream?” Starlight pondered out loud. Both mares stopped as they thought it over.

Trixie sighed and looked at the ground. “During her own experiences, Trixie has learned that acquiring fireworks is…difficult. Equestria has strong regulations placed on anything that can be used for mass destruction. Weapons, explosives, and such are hard to acquire without a permit. Entertainers, performers, and event planners are the usual candidates for permits because fireworks are often a necessity. Anypony can have one, you just have to have a relatively clean criminal record and be of age.” 

Starlight tapped her chin. “I don’t recall hearing about any notorious criminals in Ponyville back in the day. So, if Al Capony was underage, he wouldn’t be able to purchase fireworks. Does that mean that he wouldn’t be able to sell them either?” 

The mares stared at each other as they made a silent mutual agreement. They hastily set off for Dr. Hooves’ workshop. 

The sound of Pinkie’s laughter and singing echoed throughout the crystal halls of the Friendship Castle, serving as a constant reminder that Rainbow Dash had to work quickly. Luckily, speed was her specialty. Traversing the spacious corridors was a breeze, but finding the actual firecracker proved more difficult. She checked Twilight’s office first, trying to rummage through the room without completely ransacking it. She wasn’t sure if the treasure and the firecracker would be kept together or apart. It was reasonable to think that the money would be deposited somewhere while the firecracker was locked up for safekeeping. But the bits could also be under inspection for potential clues. 

Rainbow mentally scolded herself for thinking about the money, knowing that it wasn’t important. It wasn’t threatening to blow Rainbow’s life to pieces. She had to focus on the firecracker and where it could be hidden. It definitely wasn’t in Twilight’s office, so she sped over to Starlight’s counseling room. The room was smaller than Twilight’s, which came with its own benefits and challenges. Everything was closer together, making it easier to see everything but harder to navigate. It wasn’t buried under the stored boxes of tissues nor was it crammed under the cushions of the chairs. She nearly got her left wing caught in a suspended kite as she looked through the bookcase. She didn’t recall Starlight mentioning a secret passage, but her friends had taught her that a secret passage was more likely than one might expect. There was nothing in the glass cases except vases and artifacts. The filing cabinet was, of course, full of files on students.

“So boring.” Rainbow groaned as she slammed the cabinet shut.

The air whipped through her mane as she took a series of turns and arrived at Starlight’s bedroom. The pegasus wasn’t a fan of blatant invasions of privacy, but the circumstance called for desperate measures. She entered cautiously and examined the room. There wasn’t much in there to inspect. She lifted the bed, checked drawers, and even dug through the house plants. Rainbow took a cursory look at Starlight’s desk and noticed a record. 

“Holy buck, is this an original marevana album!” Dash cried out a little too loudly. 

The record was one of the coolest things that Rainbow had seen all day, but she knew that there were more pressing matters. She looked around to ensure that she had seen everything. She was at a loss for what to do next, not knowing where else to search. She thought about searching Twilight’s bedroom, but she wasn’t sure how involved Twilight was with the investigation. She had only checked the alicorn’s office because she had first seen the firecracker there. She ruffled a nervous hoof through her mane.

“Come on Dash! Think! If you were a firecracker, where would you be?” she muttered. 

The speedster hated feeling this way, like she didn’t know what she was doing, like she was helpless. Trixie might have it, but the magician’s cart was nowhere to be found outside. Dash had assumed that Trixie was crashing with Starlight, but she could be staying in one of Twilight’s near infinite guest rooms. Rainbow could look through them, but there were so many. Where could she even start? Did she have enough time to look? Rainbow frowned and tried not to spiral. She was relieved by the sweet sound of a cheery voice resonating from the kitchen. 

“What’s that you say Twilight! Trixie had you teleport her ENTIRE WAGON inside in order to avoid the rain! And at this very moment, it’s parked one right, one left, then two more rights from Starlight’s bedroom! I might need to go check it out in thirty-two minutes and fifty-three seconds!” Pinkie screamed innocuously. 

Rainbow Dash chuckled as she lifted off of the ground. She knew that her friend couldn’t hear her, but she talked to her anyways. “Thanks, Pinkie.”

She followed Pinkie’s directions to a T and landed and rejoiced when Trixie’s wagon came into view. She zealously grabbed the door handle, but it didn’t open. She pushed and tugged and then pushed and tugged again, but nothing came of it except a jostled wagon and an irate Wonderbolt. She huffed as she circumnavigated the wagon, looking for a secondary entrance to use. 

“Nothing. Fine, I’ll just get in through the window.” she declared. 

It wouldn’t be too difficult for the pegasus, since aerial entrances often involved working around windows. All that she had to do was slide the windowpane up and get in. 

“Yep, a piece of cake.” Rainbow gulped as she gave the wagon jerk. 

“Pinkie this cake is delicious!” Twilight praised as she helped herself to another spoonful. 

The dish was a simple lemon pound cake, but it tasted positively delectable. It was only made better by the addition of vanilla ice cream, creating a wonderful combination of cold and warm. The sweet fruity flavors melted in Twilight’s mouth as Pinkie happily recounted her adventures in Canterlot. 

“So, the time for the impromptu special celebration is here and I am soooooo excited! I’m hippin’ and hoppin’ and getting ready to go all out on stage, but nopony else is ready to go. I mean, I know that we just threw the band together a few minutes prior, but everypony was super talented. So I started squinking, and I did that until everypony came together to form the incredibleeeeee Ladybug Jamboree! And then we rocked out on stage and had a fantastic time!”  

Twilight swallowed as she processed what she just heard. She looked at Spike quizzically, but the little dragon could only shrug in response. He sprinkled a few more gems into his bowl before turning to Pinkie. 

“You…’started squinking?’” 

Pinkie swiftly added six more scoops of ice cream to her bowl and mixed it. “Yeppers! I squished, and I winked, and then I thinked! I squinked! A Pinkie Squink!” 

Twilight wiped her muzzle with a napkin and smiled at her friends, this was shaping up to be a pleasant afternoon. Being away from her friends always reminded her how much she valued their company. 

“I’m happy to hear that, Pinkie. I’m really glad you’re back! Maybe you could even hel-” Twilight wasn’t able to complete her thought because she was interrupted by the sound of several crashes and bangs. The clamor seemed to come from another area in the castle. Twilight’s wings flared as she got into battle position and her horn charged with magic. She prepared to instruct Pinkie and Spike on what to do before Pinkie burst into giggles. 

“OH, oopsies Twilight! My party cannon must have gone off! No need to check out THE VERY LOUD CRASH THAT WE ALL TOTALLY HEARD!” Pinkie screeched and pushed up her glasses. 

Twilight wasn’t exactly sure if she had been out of Pinkie’s presence for too long, but her friend seemed more shouty than usual today. She let Pinkie’s explanation quell her before realizing that something was off. 

“Pinkie, what party cannon?” Twilight asked as she studied the room. 

“Oh, this one!” Pinkie exclaimed as a miniature party cannon appeared in her hooves. She plopped it down on the table for Twilight to get a better look and pulled a remote control out of her mane. “Check this out Twi-Twi!” 

She pressed one of the buttons on the control and the party cannon moved forward. Twilight’s eyes grew wide as the tiny party cannon maneuvered around the table with Pinkie’s indirect guidance. 

Pinkie twirled the controller around in her hooves and blew on it. “A remote-controlled party cannon! With…a built-in timer for automated ignition.” 

Twilight touched a gentle hoof onto the barrel of the tiny cannon. “That’s incredible Pinkie!” 

The party pony winked at her friend and reached into her mane. “You really think so? Well, this baby is just a prototype. I actually have the blueprints right here and I was hoping that I could maybe get a super genius pony to look over them?” 

Stars appeared in Twilight’s eyes as Pinkie hoofed over her plans. This really was a pleasant afternoon.

All that Rainbow cared about was that the window was finally open. It doesn't matter that the wagon was slightly overturned or that everything inside of it was scattered. She had heard Pinkie’s warning and knew that time was running out. She had used the force of her take-off speed to jerk the windowpane up, snapping the lock and rocking Trixie’s entire home. The riddled contents of boxes, suitcases, and crates flooded the wagon as Rainbow leapt inside. She dug into the mess of items that she partially created in the cramped space. Diving into a sea of miscellaneous magic objects, she repeatedly told her brain to focus on something black and yellow. She submerged herself in the chaos trying in vain to find the accursed firecracker. 

“Merciful Luna, this is a nightmare!” she complained as she threw her hooves up in exasperation. 

The rainbow pony was up to her shoulder in stuff. She looked up to the ceiling and prayed that somepony would just put her out of her misery. That’s when she saw the suitcase propped up on the wall. A sticky note was placed on the suitcase and had a message in big red writing. 

“Do not open. Not a firework inside.” Rainbow read aloud as her entire body began to ache. She grunted as she hoisted herself out of the mess and wearily grabbed the suitcase. Forgoing any semblance of stealth, Rainbow simply bashed the suitcase against the ground until it burst open. She could see a heavenly yellow light illuminating the open suitcase as she gazed upon the object of her desire. 

“Hey Honeybee.” Dash practically cried as she cradled the firework in her hooves. 

“If it is truly as urgent as you two say, I guess you can go up and wait for her in her room. I’ll make sure to let her know that you’re up there.” Mrs. Cake said as she wiped down the front counter. 

Applejack tipped her hat to the baker and led the way upstairs. Mrs. Cake had told her and Rarity that Pinkie was off visiting Twilight, but they insisted that they needed to be here upon her return. They climbed the stairs and made their way to the loft, only pausing to wave at Pound and Pumpkin from the hallway as the infants played with their toys.

Rarity softly shut Pinkie’s bedroom door behind her as Applejack huffed and looked around. The unicorn was still reeling from her and Applejack’s conversation earlier, and now she was getting ready to launch herself headfirst into a potentially messier confrontation. She smiled fondly at the decor of Pinkie’s room as she remembered the joy that went into planning it out. She sat down on Pinkie’s couch and patted the seat beside her to beckon Applejack to sit down. It was obvious that Applejack’s anxiety surrounding the situation surpassed Rarity’s by tenfold, which led to the unicorn playing a more supportive and calming role. She watched Applejack pace and tried to think of something soothing. 

“Applejack darling, I assume that your time in Appleloosa was effective and rewarding.” 

Applejack groaned as she rubbed her eyes. “Yeah Rares it sure was, and I’m startin’ to think I should’ve never left.” 

“Listen Applejack, I’m sorry that things are going so sour. Trust me I feel much of the same way but we nee- Oh dear, it seems that somepony is coming in through the window.” Rarity stood up and joined Applejack at the foot of the stairs up to Pinkie’s balcony. 

Rainbow Dash muttered as she opened the balcony doors and let herself in. She felt her body involuntarily relax as the smell of cookies, cakes, and cupcakes hit her nostrils. Her ear twitched as she picked up the sound of movement at the bottom of the stairs. 

“Hey, Pinks! Thanks for the distraction, I got Honeybee but I made a bit of a me- ah buck!” Rainbow jumped over the banister and hovered just out of Applejack’s hoof length. She barely had any time to react when the farmer charged up the stairs with no intention of stopping to avoid a tackle.

Applejack threw her hat at the pegasus as she stomped her hooves. “I knew you two were at the head of this! I trusted y’all! I trusted y’all to handle this and now we got ponies here to destroy us!” 

“Come on AJ, just take it easy. We can talk this out like adults.” Dash pleaded. 

“Abso-lute-ly not! This ain’t a prank or a bad joke! Y’all done went and put my family and livelihood in danger! Celestia forgive me, I’m gone tar and feather the both ya and I’m gone use your feathers to do it! And I’m gonna have two brand new pink and blue coats come winter time when I tear the hide off of ya!” Applejack snarled as she looked ready to take a chance and jump over the balcony. 

Rarity looked on in an odd mix of fear and anger, uncertain of what to do or who to help. She could practically see steam blowing out of Applejack’s nostrils as the farmer continued to hurl extremely colorful threats at the pegasus. She sighed as she recognized that today was going to be a very long day.