//------------------------------// // Eager to Please // Story: Lunar Liability // by Carpetbagger //------------------------------// The morning sun peeked through the curtains of Big Macintosh's bedroom, bathing the stallion in light. Normally, he'd already be up and about at the crack of dawn. But with no trees to buck or fields to plow, a few extra hours of sleep couldn't hurt. It felt like years since the last time he slept in, and he was going to take advantage of it. Letting out a deep stretching yawn, the stallion reached across the bed for Smarty Pants, but felt something different instead. It was much larger than a doll, but very, very soft. When he backed away, it drew in closer and snuggled into his chest. Big Macintosh finally opened his eyes and realized Princess Luna was in bed with him! Shocked, he rolled away and crashed to the floor head over hooves. "Good morning masssster." Facade hissed in a low breathy whisper. The unicorn was in the middle of rising from a shadow cast by his bed. Smiling, she offered a tray with a hot towel, shaving supplies, a toothbrush, a small mirror and a freshly picked wheat straw. "Whut's all this about?" The sleepy draft stallion asked in a shaky voice. "Bedssside manner." Facade replied baring a fanged smile. Big Macintosh walked past the shadowy mare and towards the hallway. "Does thisss not pleasssse you?" "Nnope!" "Where are you going massster?" "To go an' take a shower." "Do you require my assissstance?" "Nnope!" The bedroom door slammed and the robed unicorn stood in waiting. Yawning, Princess Luna sat up and wiped her eyes. "Hast Lord Macintosh awakened?" The alicorn asked while stretching her wings. Facade gave a nod. "Good, we shall prepare a morning feast worthy of a king." "But your hignesss, you don't know how to cook." Luna shrugged her shoulders. "We hath faced down dragons and trolls in the name of our kingdom. Preparing breakfast cannot be difficult. Where is our new master now?" "Taking a ssshower." The princess hopped out of bed. "I shall be in the kitchen then." Facade gave a bow and watched the dark alicorn leave. She stood for a few moments thinking of what to do next. "Maybe he needsss help washing hisss back." The grey unicorn smiled. Flicking her forked tongue vigorously Facade melted into the shadows leading out into the hall. Downstairs, Princess Luna stood in the kitchen flipping pancakes on the stove. The alicorn was without her regalia, giving her a more mortal appearance. She wore a skimpy maid's outfit, decorated with white frills and a bonnet atop her head. Her shimmering mane was tied back, preventing it from wandering into the food. Unfortunately, what the princess was preparing wouldn't be considered edible by most ponies standards. A dash of salt here instead of sugar, missing ingredients accidentally used for another dish. The palace cooks made it look so easy. Sitting at the table, Apple Bloom was busy pouring honey into a bowl of dark mush. "Thanks fer' cooking breakfast Princess Luna." Apple Bloom said with a forced smile. She lifted a spoonful of the muck and watched it slither off her utensil. "No thanks are necessary young apple. But please, call us Luna." "But ain't ya still a Princess?" "Tis true, we are still a princess but-" "BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Hearing the loud scream both Luna and Apple Bloom looked up to the ceiling. Apple Bloom blinked a few times in confusion. After some muffled argument from upstairs, a wet maned Big Macintosh stomped down the stairs. The stallion sat across from Apple Bloom and mumbled to himself, head propped up by a hoof. "Mornin' big brother." Apple Bloom beamed. Big Macintosh continued to mumble to himself until Luna approached him with a large mug of coffee. "The middle Apple sibling told us you were much like an Ursa Major without thy morning brew." Taking a sip of the harsh black liquid Big Macintosh felt more like himself. He looked up at the princess eagerly waiting for any sign of approval. He raised his mug affectionately and Luna returned to the stove. "Where's Applejack?" Big Macintosh spoke up. "Don't ya'll remember? She's gone to see Twilight about that weird spell Luna cast on ya." The filly whispered. "She said to humor Luna in the meantime." Apple Bloom tasted a spoonful of her mush, giving a look of disgust. "Could ya pass the cinnamon?" Big Macintosh slid the jar over the the filly. "Ah didn't even know you ate oatmeal." "Ah think it's supposed to be waffles." Apple Bloom muttered. "Least' the coffee seems okay." Big Macintosh replied inspecting his mug. "That's cuz' Applejack made it before she left." The filly smiled back before taking another sample of her liquid waffles. A tint of green engulfed the filly's face, but she was still determined to consume the ill prepared meal. "Could ya pass the pepper?" Sliding the shaker across the table Big Macintosh looked over at Luna. "Ah think y'all need to put a bell on your assistant. Almost broke my neck when she snuck up behind me in the shower." Luna curled her lips blushing. "Forgive Facade, she means well, but has no grasp on the concept of personal space." "Ah can see that." "Aw, she ain't so bad." Apple Bloom spoke up. "Well, aside from the hissing an' that thing she does with her tongue. Ah hope Ah could get a special talent as cool as hers." She took another bite of mush and struggled to swallow it. "Could ya pass the ketchup?" Big Macintosh slid the bottle to the filly. "Ah reckon you do enough sneaking around as is." "Yeah, you're prolly right." The filly giggled, she took another bite and gave a look of satisfaction before digging in. "Ya still gonna help me an' the rest of the crusaders with our history project?" "Ah'm not sure if Ah got time now." Big Macintosh sighed. "Ah gotta head to city hall and see if we got meteor insurance." "T'was a falling star." Luna interjected, placing a plate of smoldering pancakes and blackened hash browns on the table. "Well, Ah gotta figure out if we got falling star insurance." The draft stallion lifted his mug for another sip, but realized it was empty. When he tried to get up to pour another cup, Luna had the pitcher ready in her magic aura. "Please, allow us master." The alicorn purred, refilling his mug. "Thank ya kindly. But stop calling me master, it don't sound right." "Yes mi'lord." Luna bowed before going back to tending the kitchen. Big Macintosh rolled his eyes and took another sip of coffee. "Sorry sugar cube, but Ah gotta figure out what we're gonna do about the farm. This' gonna set us back for Applebuck Season." "What is the subject of thy report young apple?" Luna asked. Apple Bloom pulled a paper from her saddlebags and set it on the table. "We gotta do a report on the battle of Boulder's Gate." "We could help." The alicorn smiled. "Ya'll know about that battle?" "Know about it? We lived it!" Luna struck a heroic pose, proudly patting her chest. Apple Bloom's eyes grew wide at the thought of the princess telling her tale of the battle. "Wow! Then can ya help, Luna?" "Tis' not my decision young apple." The night alicorn darted her eyes to Big Macintosh. "Please, big brother, can Luna help with my report? Pleaaaase?" "Well, Ah don't kn-" Big Macintosh looked down at the pair of saucer sized amber eyes batting up at him. The stallion was well aware of the dreaded tactic, and held his ground. The last time he fell for such a maneuver, it led to the Cutie Mark Crusaders Logging fiasco that almost put Sweet Apple Acres out of business. Big Macintosh looked away, but met a pair of midnight blue orbs, dilated with emotion. Luna was using the exact same tactic, and it was much more effective. Adding insult to injury, she stood over his sister, affectionately wrapping her forelegs around the filly. When they started sharing the same innocent smile while batting their eyes together, Big Macintosh felt a sharp pain in his chest. Hnnnng! Outnumbered, the stallion gave a defeated sigh. "...Eyup." Elated, Apple Bloom gave the draft stallion a loving nuzzle. Big Macintosh couldn't help to smile, seeing his sister happy. He watched the filly slide her saddle bags on and rush outside. "Ah can't wait ta tell Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, we got help from a princess!" "You would make a good father one day." Luna whispered, resting a hoof on the blushing stallion's shoulder. Big Macintosh couldn't help but blush at the thought of being a parent. Or was the princess making him blush? Behind the pair, a thick cloud of smoke began to accumulate. Big Macintosh sniffed the air for a moment, but a blaring smoke alarm beat him to the realization. Breep! Breep! Breep! Breep! Breep! Breep! Startled, Luna ran to the stove, desperately trying to fan the flames away. Eventually she managed to get the fire under control and levitated a boiling pot away. "Drat! We hath burned the orange juice!" Big Macintosh slid out of his chair in the confusion and made a break for the door. "Ah think Ah'll get a bite to eat while Ah'm out. Don't wait up for me." Across town in the library, Twilight Sparkle, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie sat at a roundtable enjoying tea. Rainbow Dash was in the adventure section, browsing through the new Daring Do titles. Normally, the group of friends would have gathered for lunch anyway, but they decided to have an emergency meeting when word spread about Sweet Apple Acres. Everything was silent while the four mares tended to their own thoughts. Fluttershy stirred her beverage carefully so she wouldn't spill anything. Pinkie Pie took greedy gulps of tea and ate more than her fair portion of pastries. Twilight took calculated sips of her drink, occasionally looking to the upper loft where Spike sat on Applejack watch. Despite being in their own little worlds, all five ponies had the same subject on their minds. Except Rainbow Dash, she was preoccupied with the synopsis of Daring Do and the Raiders of the Lost Mark. Having enough, Rarity slammed a white hoof on the table, jarring everypony out of their concentration. "Girls, are we just going to sit here all afternoon and ignore the proverbial elephant in the room?" The fashionista spoke up. The others, minus Rainbow Dash looked at the Rarity, failing to hide their interest. Pinkie Pie showed interest too when she gave up on looking for elephants. "I thought we decided to wait for Applejack to tell us what happened when she's ready." Twilight retorted. "Twilight, darling, you know how proud and stubborn Applejack can be." Rarity disclosed with a dismissive slight of hoof. "If we wait on her, we'll never know what happened." "But um, isn't it still up to her to tell us?" Fluttershy asked softly, siding with the librarian. Rarity took a dainty sip of her teacup and breathed her discontent. "Humph! While you girls decided to wait around, quite silently I might add, I decided to take the initiative." Feeling the discerning lavender eyes laid on her, Rarity turned her attention to Twilight ready for any and all logical ripostes. "Well, did you figure out what that thing was?" Rarity gave a half grin. "According to some, shall we say? reliable sources it was meteor." "You mean Caramel and Lucky?" "But of course, I'm not one for idol gossip, Twilight." Rarity smirked, turning her nose up defiantly. She could hear the rounds of chuckles and tried to mentally force away the increasing burning in her cheeks. Pinkie Pie bounced with excitement, more than ready to add her own theory. "Omigosh! What if it's a ship full of giant alien robots that can disguise themselves as vehicles and they're looking for some big cube thing that crashed here thousands of years ago but there's a bunch of evil alien robots already here looking for it but it turns out the cube thingy is hidden under this big power plant down the hall from their even more evil leader who went to search for the cube by himself but was discovered by an explorer searching the arctic!" Everypony shot Pinkie a look of confusion. "Hey, It could happen." The pinky pony mumbled, returning to her seat. "...I heard Luna had something to do with it." Said a raspy voice from across the room. The others looked at the approaching Rainbow Dash, balancing a book on her back. The cyan pegasus took a seat and pulled the novel open. "Princess Luna? Where did you hear that?" Twilight asked. "From the weather patrol." Rainbow smiled smugly as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "She was trying to stop a star or something but crashed behind the farm. The fire was so bad, they had to use two days worth of rain clouds to get it under control." "Oh my, that's terrible." Fluttershy gasped. "Applejack must be devastated. Is there anything we can do to help?" Feeling four ponies looming over her for a decision, Rainbow Dash looked up from her book and sighed. She took the time to play with the question in her head before articulating a proper response. "I dunno, maybe we should just wait for AJ to say something." Everypony around Dash let out collective groans of frustration. "You don't have to wait long, because here she comes!" Spike called out from the upstairs loft, pointing at the window. "Okay girls, act natural!" Twilight perked up. "And whatever you do don't say anything until Applejack mentions it." She added, glaring at Pinkie Pie. Pinkie responded by zipping an invisible zipper across her mouth, breaking it off, burying it in an invisible hole, and building an invisible house on top of the invisible mound. Suddenly, the library door bust open and Applejack entered, mane frazzled and sweating. "Heeey Applejack." Twilight greeted in wide grin, failing at subtlety. "How's everything go-"The farmer pony lept across the room and tackled Twilight, pinning her down. "Twilight, ya gotta help me, Luna was tryin' to stop a star from fallin' and crashed behind the farm. But Big Macintosh saved her and she summoned this snake lady as a witness for this weird whoo-doo ritual, and now she's acting like my big brother's personal servant!" Twilight teleported from under the panicked farmer and reappeared at her seat. Still trying to process Applejack's rambling, the best she could do was raise an eyebrow. "Luna did what now?" "She put a spell on both of em' and now she's cooking breakfast and doing housecleanin!" Applejack repeated. "I told you it was Luna." Rainbow Dash blurted out with a hoof pump. Rarity shot the pegasus a malicious stare that interrupted her out of place gloating. Applejack plopped down still trying to catch her breath. She felt a hoof on her shoulder and looked up at Fluttershy giving a comforting look. "Is there anything we can do to help you with the farm?" Applejack shook her head. "Princess Luna said she was gonna' fix it. But even if she doesn't, Big Mac's got just about every kind of insurance coverage on the farm y'all could think of. Ah'm glad he didn't listen to me when Ah said it's a waste of money. But we gotta do something about Luna, what if Princess Celestia finds out?" "That's exactly what I intend to find out." Twilight announced. "Spike! Take a-" "Already ahead of you." Spike interrupted. The dragonling sat at the top of the steps feverishly writing. "Just one thing, how do you spell whoo-doo?" Princess Celestia sat at a coffee table inside her private chambers. Across the table was the source of her current frustration, but also a guilty pleasure. A very, very guilty pleasure. How many times had they been caught together? How many more times would it take to be caught in the act before the sun goddess would finally ruin her reputation. How much longer could she resist just leaping across the table and mounting the poor thing. The princess, with all her infinite wisdom did the only thing she could do. Put an end to it. "I'm sorry, but we can't keep seeing each other like this." Princess Celestia spoke in an even tone. She let out a sigh and tried looking away to avoid temptation. "I-It's not you, it's me. I have an entire kingdom to run. My little ponies, they look up to me." In a moment of weakness the princess looked back, licking her lips at her conflict of interest sitting stoically across the table. "But we had a good run, right? All those times I would sneak out, just to see you." The white alicorn leaned closer, whispering with a roguish grin. "Just for a taste. Remember that night with the whipped cream and chocolate syrup?" Celestia stopped her self and looked away, shielding her eyes dramatically with a foreleg. "I hate when you do that! I try to have a serious discussion and you sit there, tempting me. Why do you have to be so tall, dark and mmmm, delicous." The alicorn looked around and leaned across the table again licking her lips. "Maybe one more for the road wouldn't hurt. But you're taking the fall if we get caught this time." "Poof!" Princess Celestia looked up at the freshly materialized scroll above and grabbed it with her magic. Removing the seal, she eagerly read the letter. With each passing line her face gradually deteriorated into a look of concern. By the final paragraph, worry quickly transformed into a blushing grin. "Yln Vo' Toy'Athghach? My little Luna is finally growing up." Celestia magically pulled a pen and scroll from her bookshelf and quickly filled out her response. Stopping for a moment, she looked across the table. Sitting there was a six layered double chocolate cake, decorated with strawberries, ribbons of vanilla icing, and rows of strawberries across its top. The princess smiled warmly at the oversize confection as if it were a forbidden lover. "Don't worry, I didn't forget about you." Back at the library, Applejack paced around the table in the middle of the room agitated. Rainbow Dash had her nose buried in her book, ignoring the worried farmer. Rarity and Fluttershy both shared a look of concern, and Pinkie Pie continued watching the orange mare, swirling her eyes around in her head trying to catch up. Twilight stared at the clock in anticipation for the princess' correspondence to arrive. Growling in frustration, Applejack skidded to a halt. "Twi! Are ya sure y'all sent the letter to the right address?" "Um, this isn't the postal service Applejack." Twilight frowned. "Just give her some time. This is a pretty big deal." "Darn tootin' it's a big deal. Ah got a scorched farm, a princess casting spells on mah big brother and a unicorn that pops out of more places than Pinkie Pie." "Really?!" Pinkie Pie asked with a wild smile. "Can she do this?" The pink pony slid under the table and dropped down from the ceiling startling Fluttershy. She landed on the table and threw her forelegs out like a performer. "Ta~da!" Applejack started to massage her temples in attempt to fight back an increasing headache. "Well, since Princess Luna is here in Ponyville, this is a perfect time to get started on my 'Like Royalty' dress line." Rarity smiled making for the door. Applejack pointed an accusing hoof at the designer. "Is that all y'all can think about? Sometimes Ah wonder if Twi didn't mess up givin' ya the element of generosity." "Applejack, darling." Rarity grinned patting her mane. "This new fashion line is for charity. Not to mention it'll be a something to keep the princess preoccupied. But really, what kind of trouble could Luna cause anyway." Luna sat curled up on the living room couch. Around her were various cookbooks and baking magazines levitating about. Tilting her reading glasses, she let out a sigh. Even though the moon alicorn had slain countless foes to protect Equestria, she felt the culinary arts were a much harder beast to defeat. So many foreign words being used. Julienne, saute, garnish? It was like a strange arcane language to the princess. But with the determination only capable of a demigoddess, Luna silently vowed to master this strange trade. "Howdy Luna!" Apple Bloom peeked her head around the corner. Luna closed her book and took of her spectacles. "Ah, young apple, please enter." The yellow filly scuttled into the room and took a seat on the floor in front of the princess. "C'mon girls." She called out. With a few more gestures, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle wearily walked in and sat down with their classmate. Both crusaders looked in disbelief. Sitting across from them was none other than Princess Luna, shimmering mane and all, ready to help with a simple school report. "Greetingsss children." Facade emerged from a darkened corner holding a tray full of refreshments. Startled, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle cowered behind Apple Bloom. "Thanks Facade." The filly responded, she stood up and took a step to the side exposing Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle hugging each other in fear. Realizing they were out in the open, Scootaloo pushed the white unicorn away and tried to look as brave as possible. "Don't be afraid, I have snackssss." Facade whispered, levitating the plates on the table in front of the fillies. Apple Bloom was the first to take a baked apple slice and gave a reassuring smile to her friends. Once the other two crusaders joined the filly, Facade gave a bow and retreated back into the dark corner. "Whoah, cool!" Scootaloo exclaimed with a cheek full of food. "She talks funny..." Sweetie Belle added in, nibbling on an apple dumpling. "Yeah, maybe when we're done with our project we could try getting ninja cutie marks or something." Apple Bloom said with hopeful eyes. Luna watched the crusaders with a warm smile on her face. When they finished eating, Apple Bloom pulled a pad and pencil out and sat in front of Luna. "Are ya ready to help with this here report?" The filly asked. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle produced their own notebooks and pencils, ready to take notes. "What dost thou need?" Inquired Luna, tapping her chin in thought. "Tell us you most awesomest story!" Scootaloo spoke up, fluttering her wings. "Yeah, a story." Sweetie Belle parroted. "But make sure it's about the battle of Boulder's Gate." Luna rose up from the couch and took on an assertive, yet theatrical posture. A chilly breeze blew through the room, causing the three fillies to shiver. Lights began to dim and lightning flashed from outside. The princess gave a sinister smile. "We have the perfect story..." 2000 Years Ago... The Seapony Song Tavern, it was a small place. The last holding for deserters and travelers alike that had no stake in the ongoing conflict. Amongst the motley assortment of patrons lulled into a haze of inebriation, grizzly trophies decorated the walls of the run down establishment. But on this night, two armies would settle their differences with honor and bravery. Representing the nation of Equestria, Princess Luna sat at the roundtable. Backing her were an army of her most trusted Lunar Stallions. Ponies that swore allegiance to the moon princess, prepared to serve her at any cost. Sitting across from the regal figure was the scourge of the seven nations, the champion of the northern peaks, Hrothgar the Heavy Hooved. Joined by a gathering of vicious bloodthirsty mongrels that struck fear in the most hardened of warriors Hrothgar brandished a sinister jagged toothed grin. Both armies gathered in the cramped tavern behind their leaders. Eyes sharper than any sword, tempered will that brought envy from the most skilled of blacksmiths, fires in their hearts that only the gates of Tartarus could match. The tension in the air was thicker than any miasma, pulling the attention of any and all onlookers with a shred of curiosity within them. Giving a grunt to the moon princess, Hrothgar raised his mighty goblet, and guzzled its contents like he's done so many times before. War cries and chants of his brethren filled the tavern as the barbarian finished his drink. Wiping the froth from his fiery beard, the stallion stood up. When his forces fell silent, a smile drew across Hrothgar's weather beaten face. The mighty stallion puffed his chest out and let out a belch harsher than the most unrelenting sturmwind, blowing the princess' silvery blue mane back. Confident, Hrothgar returned to his seat knowing victory was within his grasp. Princess Luna gave an appreciative nod to the doughty warrior. She clopped her hooves together, signaling for a drink suitable of trouncing foe as worthy as he. Emerging from the gathering of her soldiers, two lunar unicorns struggled to carry a cannikin, five hands tall. Effortlessly, Princess Luna grabbed the container from the fleeting magical aura and threw her head back consuming the harsh malt in loud voracious gulps. Hrothgar's crimsons eyes widen, but he did not falter. Once Luna drank her fill, she slammed the flask on the table, shattering it into splinters. Drawing in a short breath of air, the princess cast a knowing gaze to her forces, in which they obliged by overturning their tables and seeking cover. Princess Luna threw her head back, inflated her chest in preparation. Though he did not dare to retreat, Hrothgar's body was not ready. The cacophonous roar of Princess Luna's belch was as powerful as it was deadly. The very heavens trembled under its glory. Hrothgar and his army were caught in the eruption, thrown through the tavern's new patio. When the dust and debris cleared, only Luna and her army remained. Rising victoriously, the princess slammed the cask against her brow, shattering it. As the bar's patrons and lunar stallions cheered the princess on she reared up, voicing her satisfaction in a gallant cry. "Huzzah!" "...and that is how we defeated Hrothgar the Heavy Hooved's forces at Boulder's Gate." The three fillies stared at Luna, almost lost in the awe of her incredible tale. Shaking her head, Apple Bloom regained her senses and elbowed Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle back into reality. Luna watched the crusaders scribbling in their notepads in hopes of impressing their teacher. She was so enamored with the young ponies that she didn't notice Big Macintosh and Rarity standing at the archway. "Lord Macintosh, you hath returned!" Luna smiled, rising from the couch and approaching the stallion. Rarity leaned into him whispering conspiratorially. "Lord Macintosh?" "Not now Rarity, not now." Big Macintosh whispered back before being pulled into Luna's embrace. The giggling of three fillies, made him back away. "Sooo, your highness." Rarity spoke up, trying to break up the awkwardness. "How long will you be staying in Ponyville?" "As long as it takes for us to repay our debt!" Princess Luna replied patting her chest. Rarity had to bite her lip to hold back the rush of excitement emanating from her. "That's just perfect! Er... I mean, I'm sorry to hear that. Should I be sorry to hear that? Ah, anyway, there's an upcoming charity function and I was wondering if you would be interested in being the inspiration for my clothing line for said event." The designer rambled, holding back the urge to explode from the thoughts of how this could put Carousel Boutique on the map. Luna forced an awkward smile at the overly enthusiastic Rarity. "Tis' not our decision. It's up to our master." Luna said, darting her eyes to Big Macintosh. Immediately, a white and purple blur fell at his hooves. "Oh please! Let Princess Luna take part in history in the making. She must... SHE MUST!" The fashionista begged, even lowering herself to kissing at the stallion's fetlocks. Letting out a sigh, Big Macintosh admitted defeat, once again. "...Eeyup." "Oh thank you! THANK YOU!" Rarity gushed. "Come, Sweetie Belle. I have much preparation to do." Rarity proudly marched out of the living room followed by the white filly. Sweetie Belle stopped for a moment and looked up a the princess. "Thank you for helping with our project, Princess Luna." The alicorn reached out to pat the little unicorn on the head, but she was joined by Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. "Yeah, thanks fer all your help." "Miss Cheerilee's going to flip when she reads it." Before Luna could find a way to show appreciation, all three crusaders hugged at her forelegs. Caught in the moment, the princess graciously returned the affection by scooping the fillies up into a warm embrace. "No, thank you... my little ponies." She managed to breath out with a knot of emotion in her throat. After a few moments Luna set the young ponies down and watched them leave out behind Rarity. "Ah think ya'll would make a good mother one day." Big Macintosh whispered, resting a hoof on the princess' shoulder. Luna smiled back with patches of red on her cheeks. "...Indeed." "Twilight? Ya'll been mullin' over that there letter for almost two hours!" Applejack said, digging a hoof into the hardwood floor. Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and even Rainbow Dash stared at the lavender mare trying to make sense of the correspondence. Twilight was giving the scroll another pass wondering if Spike managed to hiccup send her letter to the wrong address. To my faithful student, My heart swells with pride that my sister, Princess Luna has found a suitor. Though it seems that he's a commoner, I have enough connections with the nobility to keep his social status a secret. Love should not be restricted to one's upbringing, don't you agree? I'll give the two lovers some time to get settled in before I make a visit to Ponyville. In the meantime, make sure that Luna enjoys her stay. -Princess Celestia of Equestria Twilight set the scroll down and stroked at the base of her horn. Letting out a sigh she looked up her five friends sharing varying degrees of confusion. "I don't think the princess understands." "I'll say." Spike interrupted. "It sounds like she thinks Luna is getting- Hic" Unexpectedly, the baby dragon belched forth a cloud of jade embers taking the form of another scroll which Twilight grabbed hastily. "Maybe this will shed some light on the subject." The librarian quickly opened the scroll, expecting a better explanation from her mentor. P.S. While Luna is staying in Ponyville, please take Facade to see a dentist about her lisp. Should anypony ask, charge it to my royal account. -Princess Celestia of Equestria "Just what in the hay is going on?" Applejack spoke up. Her frustration soon washed over into a bit of relief. "Well, at least she ain't gonna throw me into a dungeon and banish the dungeon to the moon or somethin.' But still, what was that all that about Twi?" "I... I don't know..." Twilight managed to exhale. "Maybe it has something to do with Luna's ritual. I'll have to do some research." "So what do Ah do about Luna?" "Oooh-Oooh! I know!" Pinkie Pie shouted, raising a hoof as if she were in class. "Let's throw a Lunamac Party!" The sound of four hooves plus one claw slapping against five foreheads filled the room.