//------------------------------// // 18) The Element of Stupidity // Story: Equestria and the Machine // by SapphireRose87 //------------------------------// {Rainbow Dash} When we got to the USB ports we had no problem doing our job at first. We were headed to the next section to push out more USB ports when just as Samantha suspected a Firewall showed up and once again it was Eli. When he saw us he had a stupid grin on his face. “Well look at what we have here!” Eli said. “A couple of sixes trying to wreck the Lord’s kingdom again! You guys are pests you know and it’s really getting on my nerves!” “Well, if it isn’t my fake brother Firewall Eli!” I growled. “Huh,” said Eli, “you called by my official title this time! Did you hit your head on something during one of our fights, Loyalty?”  I stomped my hoof and was ready to charge at Eli when Oliver gave me a strange look. “That’s your fake brother?” Oliver asked. “Oh yeah,” I confirmed it, “that’s him!”  When Eli saw Oliver his grin became so big I’m surprised it even fit inside the Machine but since we were outside of it this time, there was plenty of room for that stupid grin. “What is that stupid grin on your face for this time Eli?” I snarled at him. “You finally brought Agent Oliver with you this time!” Eli smirked. “I was wondering when you were going to bring him to join in the fun! I was surprised to not see him fighting with you at the gates when he’s the one that damaged the 7th Gate that we’re trying so hard to repair!”   Oliver laughed wickedly at Eli, “You’re still trying to repair the 7th Gate! That happened a long time ago! And you still haven’t fixed it? Now that’s funny!” “And you should know that the Lord isn’t happy with you either, Loyalty!” Eli snarled. “And why is that?” I growled. “Because you also did damage to our gates that we’re fixing right now!” Eli said. “And you should thank Agent Grace for calling you Rainbow Crash just for you to do that! Actually I take that back, the Lord is more upset with Agent Grace than he is with you!” “So how much damage did I do to your Lord's precious kingdom?” I taunted him. “Just partial damage to two of our gates,” replied Eli, “why the Lord hasn’t requested an audience with you and Agent Oliver yet I have no idea! By the way where is that stupid Agent Grace anyway?”  “She’s being disciplined by the Sixth just for calling me Rainbow Crash and putting me and Agent Emma in danger because of doing that!” I said. “Wow,” said Eli and he looked surprised, “I didn’t know the Sixth does that! However, where is the other pest agent friend of yours Agent Emma this time?”  “I have no idea,” I said, “and I wouldn’t tell you even if I knew! Since I’m not working the gates this time, I have no problem doing the same damage to your stupid USB ports!” “What is he talking about RD?” Oliver questioned. “You did partial damage to two gates? Did I hear that correctly?”  “Yup,” I said, “you heard it correctly, and as he said Agent Grace called me Rainbow Crash to do it! And I’m glad she’s being disciplined right now, honestly, I don’t need the nickname to do my job!” “Uh-huh,” said Eli. He rolled his eyes. “Sure you don’t!” Eli stared up at the sky as he was thinking about something. He did that very often before we started a fight and it was getting on my nerves! Before he could do anything I threw one of my daggers at him and it almost hit its mark when Eli jumped out of the way. “See?” I taunted. “I told you I didn’t need the stupid nickname! Actually, I was already aiming my daggers at the gates and more than one too! Agent Grace calling me Rainbow Crash was actually so I could take you out! According to her it practically worked the last couple of times she did it and those couple of times she almost got her teammates killed in the process!” As I was saying what I said Eli just stood there listening with an amused look on his face. When the look he gave me brought my anger to a boiling point. I just had to do something stupid. I didn't know Eli was getting ready to use one of his high-level attacks until Oliver yanked on my tail and pulled me backwards. I didn’t have enough time to think of what to do next when Oliver jumped in front of me and I stared at his weapon in amazement. His weapon looked a lot like one of the barriers that Eli would use as one of his high-level attacks.  “Are you okay RD?” Oliver asked. “I’m fine!” I said. “Why did you yank on my tail?” “Because you weren’t watching Eli getting ready to do a high-level attack!” Oliver said.  “Huh?” I said. I looked to see what Eli had in his hand was a barrier like one of the ones he would use but this one looked like a new attack to me. The barrier in Eli’s hand started spinning and fast too. “Are you that stupid in a fight RD?” Gilda asked. “No, I’m not!” I saw Eli throw his attack at Gilda because she didn’t have her weapon out yet. “Watch out!” I pushed Gilda out of the way just in time and it just grazed my ear in the process. Gilda looked at me in amazement at what I did. “I was angry this time,” I said, “but I saw it coming when Oliver yanked on my tail! At least my teammates are looking out for my safety this time!” “This time?” Gilda said. “Yeah,” I said, rolling my eyes at her, “this time!” “Wow Loyalty,” Eli teased, “looks like you’re quick on your feet or should I say hooves this time!”  “My name is not Loyalty!” I shouted at him. “If anyone or anything is called Loyalty it’s this!” This time I stood in front of Eli and spread my wings proudly showing him Loyalty hanging around my neck. When Eli saw that I was referring to Loyalty he went into a fit of hard laughter.  “Let me get this straight Loyalty,” said Eli still laughing, “you named a stone after you! Oh yeah the Lord’s going to get a real kick out of this one!” “What is with this Lord guy?” I said. “Seriously, it's getting on my nerves! And my name is not Loyalty!” “She goes by RD or in this case, Rainbow Angry!” Gilda stated. “Seriously!” I snapped. “I thought you were done with the teasing!”  “No this time I was stating the facts this time!” Gilda said.  “Okay, that’s it!” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Eli throwing another attack and once again I pushed Gilda out of the way but for some reason I got the bright idea to catch the attack in my mouth. Then, what I did next would be considered stupid by most people but as far as my logic goes, it felt like the perfect way to take my anger out of something.  After I had caught the attack in my mouth, chomping down on it, it disappeared after I did that. “My name is not Loyalty, my name is not Judy, my name is not Rainbow Crash, my name is not Rainbow Angry, my name is not RD, for crying out loud it’s Rainbow Dash and don’t you forget it!” “Wow,” said Oliver in surprise, “did you just call yourself Rainbow Dash?”  “Yeah?” I responded. “So?” “Yeah,” Eli cracked up, “I’m surprised the elements of harmony didn’t have a seventh element, the Element of Stupidity made just for you Rainbow Dash! You chomped down on one of my attacks not knowing if it could kill you or not, good job Loyalty!” When Gilda and Levi heard this they fell over laughing so hard they couldn’t breathe. Oliver on the other hand stood in front of them blocking them from attacks that Eli started throwing at us. At the moment only me and Olive were fighting. That's because Gilda and Levi were still laughing at what Eli had said a few moments ago. As I and Oliver fought Eli and Gilda and Levi were still laughing. Oliver looked like he had enough of protecting Gilda and Levi and he probably had half a mind to just leave them unprotected. I felt the same way and I was pretty sure that once Eli attacked them that they would get their heads in the fight. “Okay,” said Oliver, “protecting you two is getting old right now! If you guys don’t do some fighting soon I’m going to leave you as sitting ducks!” Oliver blocked another attack just before it grazed his shoulder when Gilda and Levi finally stopped laughing. They looked to see Oliver protecting them and saw the pissed off look he had on his face. Finally, Gilda and Levi started their fighting. “Well, it’s about time!” I snapped. “Whatever!” Gilda said.  After a while of Gilda and Levi finally doing some fighting along with us, Eli suddenly stopped throwing his attacks at us. It looked like he was just pausing to catch his breath but that wasn’t the case at all. “Damn it!” Eli said. After he said that he backed up and got on his motorcycle and drove away. “What the heck was that all about?” Gilda said. She had a bewildered look on her face. I thought about every time I fought a Firewall and this happened. Usually, if a Firewall backs off it's time for us to back off as well. Right on cue, we heard the doorbell in our ears that’s used to summon us. That’s when we heard Samantha’s voice. “You guys have been fighting Firewall Eli for two days!” “Two days!” Everyone gasped. “Yes two days,” said Samantha, “even a Firewall knows when to retreat! He just did! So you’re being summoned back to the Sixth to take a break and then head back to your original assignment.” We all understood and headed back to the Sixth. * * * Before I went back to my original assignment Samantha called me into her realm. I didn’t know what to say to her. I thought that I had screwed up on my first team assignment and was about to be handed discipline because of it. I could tell that Samantha heard my thoughts because she just couldn’t help but laugh. “Uh...Huh?” I said. “No, you didn’t screw up on your mission Rainbow Dash,” Samantha said. “I reviewed the video footage that you sent me and you don’t know when we’re doing a good job of things until after the fact! Not to mention you’re bound and determined to kill yourself huh?” “Huh?” I said in confusion. Samantha laughed, “Well let’s see, first of all, you decided to chomp down on one of Firewall Eli’s attacks and then you decided to declare yourself Rainbow Dash. You didn’t realize that you short-circuited twenty of the USB ports and pushed them out during the fight?”  I blinked. “Come again?” Samantha played the video footage for me and my jaw dropped when I saw that I did exactly what Samantha said I did. “Oh yeah, not to mention when you were at your job at the gates the Sixth reviewed the video footage from that too and you did partial damage to two of the gates when fighting those Firewalls!”  “I have a feeling that it was thanks to Agent Grace calling me Rainbow Crash,” I said. “Nope,” said Samantha after she shook her head, “it wasn’t that at all! You were already aiming your daggers at the gates before Agent Grace even did that! I think Agent Grace calling you Rainbow Crash was to take out the Firewall period! We’ve discovered that getting past a Firewall instead of taking them out is more effective in destroying the Machine at least for now until we can shut it down for good. And I knew you were going to accept your real name sooner or later.” “I’m going to take a wild guess and assume you saw that in my future?” I stated. “Yup!” Samantha said. “Now I think it’s time you go back to your original assignment. And I wouldn’t be surprised if Oliver’s overprotective of you when Luke’s around!”  “Yeah, at least he’s not stupid like Roman was!” I said. “But I don’t blame Oliver, not one little bit.” “Oh well,” said Samantha, “it’s time for you to go.” * * * When I got back to my original assignment Oliver looked like he did when I came out of Samantha’s realm and found out that I was team captain. “What on earth were you thinking?” Oliver said. “Are you delusional now?”  “No I ’m not delusional,” I answered. “I was just doing my job! And Eli pisses me off!” “And you're declaring your real name?” Oliver said. “What was up with that?”  I shrugged, “I don’t know, I guess I finally accepted it now.” “Well at least you didn’t chomp down on a Copper!” Gilda laughed. “And my name doesn’t have the word angry attached to it!” I growled. “I was just pointing out the obvious, that's all!” Gilda said. “Abigail’s right you know,” said Oliver, “if you had chomped down on a Copper you’d be dead right now!”  After Oliver said that I didn’t get a chance to say anything else when Loyalty sounded a while frantic, inside my head. I nudged Oliver on the shoulder and he nodded at me. “Abigail,” said Oliver, “we have to go.” When Gilda Oliver grabbed my hand and took me to his room she had the same look on her face that she always does. It was a look of amusement. * * * “Zach, Sadie,” said Loyalty, obviously panicked, “us elements of harmony have an emergency on our hands or stones actually!”   Once we had gotten to Oliver's room he closed the door. “Loyalty,” said Oliver, “can you calm down and tell us what happened?” “Okay, okay, okay!” Loyalty kept saying over and over again.  “Okay Loyalty!” I said. “My goodness, just tell us what happened!” “Kindness broke its connection with Fluttershy!” Loyalty said.  “What!” Oliver and I gasped. “Yeah I know!” Loyalty said it barely got the words out.  “Why would Kindness do that?” I asked. “It wasn’t Kindnesses fault!” Loyalty declared.  “Exactly what happened?” I said. “Remember what I said when an element goes silent when an evil person or pony is around?” Loyalty answered. “We also do the same thing to our connections when they’ve gone evil! But every once and awhile and by that, I mean every week that element that has gone silent to their connection tries to reason with their connection! Kindness tried very hard to reason with Fluttershy but it didn’t work just like with that stupid engagement party with Pinkie Pie! Fluttershy has gone so evil that she was able to take her necklace off and when she was trying to destroy it, Kindness left its stone just in time!” “I thought it wasn’t possible to take the necklace that as your element on it can’t be taken off?” I gasped. “That’s correct,” said Loyalty, “not even Princess Twilight can remove her crown which is funny to me because of Magic being on its high stone. The only way she can remove her crown is if Magic goes into the stone that goes with Princess Twilight’s royal attire! But if a connection isn’t strong enough then it can be broken and the necklace can be taken but before the necklace can be taken off, the element has to leave its stone first. Kindness had to do that because there was no reasoning with Fluttershy so Kindness felt sad when it had to leave, after it left the last thing it saw was Fluttershy stomping on its necklace destroying it!” “What!” I gasped after I heard what Loyalty said and my jaw dropped. “Before it needs to go to the magical realm we need to at least try and find her a new connection! We’ve been talking about a couple of options, one of them was you, Zach!” Loyalty said.  Oliver practically choked on what Loyalty just said. I tried my best not to laugh at Oliver's reaction but I’m not so sure that I was successful at it. “I’m honoured really I am,” said Oliver, “but I don’t think I want the responsibility of being an element bearer at the moment!”  “That’s okay Zach,” said Loyalty, “but just think about it okay? In the meantime Kindness and I were wondering if you Sadie would be Kindnesses connection for now? Please?” It didn’t take me too long to decide because to me being loyal also meant being kind. “Yeah, I’ll do it.” I said. “Hurray!” Loyalty cheered.  It was kind of cute to me that Loyalty sounded like a little kid that just was given ice cream for a treat before dinner.  “Don’t worry,” said Loyalty, “this won’t take but a couple of seconds to do!” It felt just like it did when I first met Loyalty only this time the bright light that flashed in front of me only happened for a second or two just like Loyalty said it would. At least this time I didn’t have to die to meet Kindness next.