Year 5, Week 19, Friday
Carlos sat on the ratty-ass couch that squatted in the safehouse living room, his head in his hands. On his left sat a vermillion unicorn, a dark orange earth pony on the right. Around the rest of the living room, eighteen other ponies slept, though a few were starting to show signs of waking up.
“So what do you want to do now Carlos?” Ricky asked, trying to scratch at the side of his head with a hoof.
“Kind of hard to do our usual business if we’re all ponies,” Fall Shadows pointed out, peering at one of the sleeping earth ponies. “Wonder who this was?”
Carlos sighed, rubbing his face. “Fuck if I know man. Just... fuck.” He tried to find the words to say what was on his mind, but just couldn’t.
“Look, Carlos,” Ricky stopped the scratching and put a hoof on Carlos’ shoulder, “no one could have expected this to happen. If what you said about what those insane ponies were doing was right, they’d have fucking killed us all. You saved all of us man.”
Carlos nodded, though he still felt like shit for not seeing this coming. “What the fuck is wrong with those ponies? I thought they said this shit was supposed to be our choice?”
Fall Shadows nodded. “I talked a lot with the ponies at the Bureau, none of them were like what you described. Were any of them wearing armor, or all white with blue manes?” Carlos and Ricky both shook their heads. Fall Shadows tapped a hoof on his chin, “Hmm, then that might mean these ponies weren’t part of the Pretty Boy Brigade. Though given some of the shit I’ve seen unicorns pull, I wouldn’t put it past em.”
Carlos opened his mouth to reply when one of the pegasus stallions sneezed and opened his eyes blearily. “Guys, why am I naked on the floor?” The coffee brown stallion lifted his head off the floor and froze as he saw his new legs. “Guys, why am I a pony?” His free wing extended itself involuntarily. “Cooool, I have wings!”
In perfect synchrony, Carlos, Ricky and Fall Shadows smacked their respective hands or hooves to their foreheads. “God damnit Kirk,” they said in unison, looking at each other in surprise.
Kirk struggled to get to his hooves, repeatedly falling down until Fall Shadows finally snorted and climbed off the couch. “Okay Kirk, you are killing me over here. Put your front hooves flat on the floor, then get your back hooves under you. Push up with your hindlegs, then your front.
After another few minutes of struggling, Kirk had gotten himself standing upright, by which time the other newly converted Homicidas were beginning to wake up. Fall Shadows quickly found himself running an impromptu pony education class, pacing back forth in front of the unruly little herd.
Carlos looked at Ricky. “This is going to be shit on wheels for a few weeks, isn’t it?” They both looked over as one of the newfoal mares awkwardly trotted up to them. “What do you want?”
She scuffed a hoof at the floor in embarrassment. “Umm, I have to take a shit...”
Ricky sighed, his ears flattening. “Yep.”
Flare clasped both hooves to his head, not even feeling himself hit the floor. He was dimly aware of the others calling out in alarm, but all his attention was focused on the throbbing pain at the base of his horn. It almost felt like he had the taste of blood in his mouth, and his nostrils were overloaded with the scene of decaying flesh. “Make it stop! Make it stop...”
...At the site of the shootout between the terrorists, police, and gangs, Helen Whitt could only watch as every single unicorn in the group they’d arrested howled in agony, the other ponies whinnying in fear. Fortunately the newfoals were still uncoordinated, so none of them were getting away. They’d fallen back at the first sparks of magic, but the rifles they’d managed to confiscate would make sure none of them tried to bolt. The real problem was that it made for one hell of a racket. “Just what in the hell is going on here...”
...Inside the Bureau daycare, the unicorn foals were screaming in terror, almost all of them losing control of their bladders as they tried to drive the horrifying sensations from their minds. Cheerheart and Cirrus were doing their best, and several officers had grabbed paper towels from the supply closet to clean them up, but in the end they had to evacuate that section of the building as several foals tried to use their magic to escape their nightmares...
...Jesse Morales stood on the other side of the street from the damaged bus with the EMTs. “What’s going on, Gridiron?”
The orange stallion appeared in the doorway. “I’m not sure! Glitter’s horn started sparking and he’s been shouting about blood and agony! I looked him over and I can’t find any further injury at all!”
Eric shrugged. “Must be a magic thing.” He turned to Jesse. “What about your scanner?”
“I checked it, it’s apparently not just us, unicorns as far away as the bridges are suffering these same symptoms.” Jesse scowled towards the Bureau, seeing other small knots of ponies helping isolate unicorns from any human passerby. “Shit, today just keeps getting better and better...”
...Carlos rocked back as Ricky tumbled from the couch, clutching his head in pain. “The fuck’s your problem?” He looked up as all of the new unicorns fell to the floor. “The fuck’s their problem?”
“I... it hurts...” Ricky spit on the floor, “tastes like blood.”
“Looks fine to me, I just think you’re all full of it.” He twitched as Ricky’s horn sparked, a dim yellow glow surrounding it. Almost immediately, his skin started to burn and he jerked backwards over the couch as he saw another unicorn on the floor starting to ignite his horn. “Fuck man! Knock that shit out!”
“Carlos!” Fall Shadows bumped him towards the door, hard. “You gotta get out of here, I’ll take care of things.” Both of them looked over as yet another unicorn lit their horn. “I’ll holler for ya when it’s safe, go wait out back.”
Carlos clenched his hands, but nodded and hurried out the back door to the small yard. Sitting on a cheap plastic chair, he felt himself wincing a little as howls of agony could be heard from inside. As much a hardass as he was, the gang was the only family he had, and seeing them hurt from something he couldn’t put bullets into infuriated him. “Those fucking douchebag ponies had something to do with this, I know it. Not gonna take that shot now, that’s for fuckin’ sure.”
“And we’re back from break. With us is Doctor Joseph Friedler, our legal expert. Joseph, what can you tell us about these revelations that griffons are operating in concert with these terrorists?”
“Well, for the time being I don’t want to speculate on whether these griffons were working for the Scythion government, or are simply these “Hunters” that some sources on the internet have been circulating. As far as their legal status goes, it really depends on if they were official US citizens or not. If they are not, then they become considered foreign combatants and would thus fall under military jurisdiction. Provided they are taken alive, of course.”
Diane nodded. “And what about the newest feed coming in, showing unicorns bearing armor of the Equestrian Royal Guard ponifying the soldiers at the airport? We don’t have audio feeds, but our footage does not seem to indicate the soldiers giving consent.”
Joseph hesitated. “Well, while it’s true that under normal circumstances this would be illegal, I think that any court of law would find that the conditions surrounding this decision to ponify soldiers who were on the verge of death from thaumatic exposure warranted action. The principle could be argued as similar to rendering lifesaving treatment to someone who could not give consent, even if the cause of their injuries was from a suicide attempt.”
Diane nodded again. “I see. What do you think is going to be the next step in this investigation?”
“Well, for starters they’ll be examining the weapons the terrorists used for any trace of information that could lead back to who hired them. In addition, if any of the terrorists were taken alive, I’m sure they’ll be taken into custody by the FBI and questioned. From there I can’t really speculate on where the investigation would lead.” That was a lie and both the lawyer and the anchorwoman knew it. There were really only two directions this could go.
The darkness surrounding him was absolute, yet it didn’t bother him as he drifted lazily. Finally, he felt his feet settling onto what felt like dirt. Gradually a sourceless light illuminated the area, revealing an endless plain of grass as tall as his waist. Running a hand through it as he started to walk, he realized that he was naked, yet the grass seemed not to cut him. “Not precisely what I think Grandmama meant by the Elysian Fields,” Moses mused as he continued onward, though where exactly he was not sure. Before long he felt the ground beginning to tremble and turned around to behold an onrushing wall of shapes, vaguely equine in form. Squaring his shoulders and digging his feet in, he prepared himself to meet their charge with nothing more than an absolute unwillingness to move. However, the wall of bodies drew to a stop, the outliers trotting slowly around to form a circle with him in the middle. One of the forms trotted closer, extending it’s muzzle toward him, it’s breath warm against his chest as it snorted...
… and Desmond snorted right back at it. “The fuck you doin’, breathin’ on me?” The spectral equine staggered back, ears flicking as the pupiless eyes narrowed. It pawed at the ground, and tossed it’s head toward the horizon. “What, now you wanna race? I dare you to try and be as fast as me, you little bitch!” Desmond took off at a dead sprint, the equines breaking into a gallop along with him. He and the equine he challenged stayed neck and neck as the herd hurtled along around them. Up ahead, he could see that the grass field suddenly ended in a sea of stars, and simply grinned. “Trying to cheat, are ya? Well you’re not gonna win this one!” Reaching over, he put his hand on the back the equine, bracing with his arm. As they hurtled off the edge he tried to maintain his grip, and even went a few paces before his arm fell right through the shimmering body. He plummeted into the darkness with an angry curse, shaking his fist at the herd thundering by overhead. Rolling over, he blinked as he saw columns and walls rising up around him...
…Emmet spread his arms and legs out to try and slow himself down as he saw the floor approaching, but realized that he was already slowing down. Coming to a gentle stop on the marble floor, he pushed himself to his feet and looked around, seeing an enormous pair of doors at the far end of the hall. “Alright, then let’s get going. No sense standing around.” He marched past the ornate statuary and artwork to the doors, pushing them open with a grunt of effort. Inside he could see a massive plinth with two thrones practically growing out of it. On his left was a glowing white presence, which resolved itself into the shape of an alicorn, it’s eyes the color of a newborn sun. On his right, a dark blue presence swirling with stars resolved itself into a near twin of the other, its own hard eyes the silver of a full moon.
Coming to a stop in front of the plinth, Emmet snapped to attention. “Ma’ams, Master Sergeant Emmet Webb, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
The darker alicorn laughed lightly. “This one is so formal in front of us sister. Its heart burns strong with the fires of duty and honor.”
The lighter one nodded. “Yes indeed. Now, to the matter of your soul’s choice of form...”
Emmet coughed politely. “Ma’am, there is a... request. I want to volunteer myself and my squad for your Royal Guard. Soldiers are what we are, and I know for a fact that we aren’t ready to lay down arms yet. If there are more of the terrorists that attacked St Louis out there, we’ll want a piece of them too.”
“So feisty,” the midnight alicorn said with a grin, “I do think I like this one.”
“But regardless, that is a choice for the waking world. You will have your chance to serve again should you choose to take it, Emmet Webb.” The white alicorn tilted her head as the wind began to pick up, tugging at Emmet’s skin...
“... Wait! Can you at least tell me if my squadmates are alright?” David asked desperately, fighting to keep his footing as the wind dragged him back to the throne room doors.
The white alicorn rose to her hooves, followed by her sister. “You truly have a caring heart, David Young. It has caused you much suffering for one so young, but it is also a source of strength for you. Hold on to that strength and things will work out for the best.” The wind picked David up and flung him through, into the blinding white light...
…David squeezed his eyes shut against the blinding sunlight that shone down on him. He felt the heat of the pavement underneath him, but realized a second later that the wind blowing gently against his skin was ruffling what felt like... “Hair?”
“Hey, he’s awake. Bout damn time there, thought you were gonna sleep the rest of the damn day off there David.” Desmond’s voice came from over his shoulder. Craning his head around, he could see a red pegasus with a shock of black mane and tail. Realizing that his head and neck shouldn’t be that flexible, he looked down at himself, white-coated and scarlet-tailed. “So... I guess they ponified us all?”
“Correct, Sergeant,” a white earth pony with a coal-black mane and tail said as he awkwardly trotted into view.
Beyond him, David could see another earth pony, this one truly massive and well muscled. “Moses?” The pony’s only reply was a curt nod. “Thank God... I was worried we’d lost everyone...”
Emmet’s ears folded back a little as he looked toward a white sheet draped over a still body. “Well, not all of us made it...”
David struggled to his hooves, taking a slow, awkward step at a time until he stood over the sheet. “Oh Roger... oh no...”
“Hey, no sense worrying about the dead, eh, ‘Heart’?” Desmond said as he trotted to stand next to David.
“What’d you call me?” David asked confusedly.
“Well, you already have that mark on your ass, makes sense to me to call ya that still.” Desmond said with a shrug, nearly falling down as he did so.
David turned his head around to look at his flank. Sure enough, there was a large, red heart emblazoned there, in the shape of a heart from a deck of playing cards. A quick check confirmed that it was on the other side as well. “Well I’ll be. ‘Heart’.” He rolled his tongue around as he considered it. “Why not? Means I get to call you Diamond more often.” He gestured to Desmond’s flank, where a white diamond shape was proudly displayed. Looking to Moses and Emmet, he could see a white club and a black spade on their flanks, respectively. “Guess we’re playing with a full deck then, huh?”
Emmet shook his head in amusement. “I guess so, Sergeant.” The four new ponies laughed a little despite the devastation surrounding them, each relieved that they hadn’t had to bury any of the other three.