//------------------------------// // Chapter 4: Numb // Story: Pony POV Spin-Off: Neo Stream BD (Before Death) // by JDEzekude //------------------------------// My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Reharmonization Pony POV Side-Story Fan-Fic Episode Title: "Neo Stream - Numb" Written By Jordan Dean "Mystery" Ezekude Inspired By Alex Warlorn Day XX/XX/XXXX Discord's Second Reign Many ponies tell me that I have a very good memory. Sometimes, I wish that I didn't have it, because there are many things that I remember. And there are some things that I wish to forget; things that I wish I never knew. I still remember the day I met him; the day I came face to face with the Spirit of Chaos himself. The day I met Discord. It all began the morning after the last Grand Galloping Gala in Canterlot, which I left early as soon as the parade was over. Mom stayed behind to meet some of her old work colleagues. When she finally got back home, she told me that I missed Rainbow Dash and her friends trashing the Gala. I guess it was a good thing that I decided to go home early. I would've panicked or stressed myself out if I stayed. Anyway, the next morning, I was on my way to the Beautiful Day Café for a café latte. I stayed up later than usual on the night of the Gala, so I felt pretty tired in the morning as a result. As soon as I got there, it started to rain. But after buying my café latte, I suddenly realised that it wasn't just raining. It was raining chocolate milk. Yeah. It was definitely raining chocolate milk. I even briefly stuck my tongue out to confirm it. But that was just the beginning. I looked up and noticed that the clouds in the sky turned pink. They almost looked like puffs of cotton candy. Chocolate rain and cotton candy clouds... "What the hell is going on here?" I thought out loud. "Is this another one of my weird dreams?" I hoped it was. But, as I sadly found out later on, it wasn't. By the time I got back home, I was completely drenched from running through the sudden downpour of chocolate milk; so drenched that I almost completely soaked the doormat without even wiping my hooves as I stepped inside. "Welcome home, dear!" my mother called out from inside the kitchen. "Mom?" I called back. "Would you mind getting me a towel? I don't wanna make a mess." "Alright, sweetie!" she replied. "I won't be long!" And thankfully, she wasn't. In a matter of seconds, she brought a long, thick towel with her to the front hallway. "Goodness!" Mom exclaimed as she began rubbing it all around my face and body to dry. "You're completely soaked!" "Yeah," I explained nervously. "On my way home, it suddenly started raining chocolate milk." "Chocolate milk!?" she gasped. "Yeah," I replied. "I couldn't believe it either, but that's what it tasted like." "On top of that," I continued. "The clouds in the sky now look like pink puffs of cotton candy. I have no idea what's going on here." "Neither do I," Mom replied reassuringly. "Anyway, I'm certain this will be taken care of, so you don't have to worry about it. Why don't you have a nice shower to clean yourself off?" "Alright," I sighed. And so I did. I stood under the warm shower washing the chocolate milk off my body along with the stress and tension from witnessing today's surreal weather. By the time I was finished, my mind and body felt completely refreshed despite today's chaos. Thus, I decided to sleep in early tonight to put my mind at ease. I slept peacefully with my curtains closed hoping that the crazy weather outside would subside tomorrow. Sadly, it didn't. The next day, I was woken up pretty early in the morning by a roaring stampede outside. I tried to ignore the commotion and get back to sleep, but to no avail. Inevitably, I decided to open my curtains and see what was going on outside though I hesitated at first fearing that the bizarre weather from yesterday hadn't subsided like my mother said it would. As soon as I drew open my curtains, everything outside suddenly went dark. I could barely see anything and I was too confused to care. Did the sun just whizz down in a split second a moment ago? Then, the sun whizzed back up again, and, within a split second, my face contorted in fright and disbelief upon seeing Ponyville suddenly transformed into a nightmarish land of pink, checker-patterned hills and floating, upside-down houses, inhabited by a stampede of long-legged critters and ballet dancing buffaloes in pink tutus. "This can't be happening," I uttered in pure shock. "Like what you see outside?" a familiar female voice scoffed behind me. "Well then, why don't you go outside and have fun!" The next thing I knew, I was suddenly kicked out of my bedroom window by my own mother. Strangely enough, I was barely injured as soon as I hit the checker-patterned grass floor, but that didn't the shock from being kicked out. "Mom?" I cried in shock as I slowly picked myself up. "What are you doing!?" "What I should've done the day you were born," she responded in an unbelievably cold manner. "Maybe your father was right about you all along." And with that, she immediately slammed the window shut and locked it. She then briefly glared at me just before closing the curtains. Thus, I was left locked outside shocked and confused. I refused to believe what I just heard from my mother's mouth. Maybe my father was right? Right about what? Being a burden to him?? According to my mother, my father broke up with her a few days before I was born. Thus, she raised me as a single parent for the rest of my life. She told me that he abandoned both of us for two reasons; one, that he wasn't ready to be a father, and two, that he believed that his child would be a burden to him and her. Is that what she meant about my father being right about me? But my mother has looked after me all my life and she always told me that having me as her son was the best thing that ever happened to her! Why the hell would she suddenly kick me out of her house and say otherwise!? Was she...just hiding her true feelings for me? Does she really feel the same way about me as my father? Would the two of them have been happier together...if I was never born at all? The longer I dwelled upon these thoughts, the more tears I shed. Never before in my life have I been overwhelmed with this much heartache, loneliness and worthlessness. There have been many times in my life in which I hated myself for the mistakes I made in the past. But, this is the very first time I ever truly hated myself simply for who I am. Maybe my parents were right. Maybe I am a burden; not only to my family, but to my friends as well. Maybe it would've been better for everypony if I never existed. "How despicable of her," scorned an elderly male voice from behind me. "Kicking out her one and only son in the world?" I immediately spun around and was startled to see a creature I never would've imagined meeting in my life; a bizarre-looking, chimera-like creature with the head of an old goat, the antler of a deer, the horn of a demented unicorn, the body of a chicken, the paw of a lion, the talon of an eagle, the hoof of a deer, the leg of a dragon and the tail of a sea serpent. What the hell was he!? "My apologies, son," the weird yet humble creature spoke. "I didn't mean to frighten you. I just came to see how you were doing. I mean, after seeing your own mother kick you out of the house and all." "Y-You saw her!?" I asked in a shaky tone of voice hoping not to upset him. "Saw and heard the whole thing as I was just passing by," he confirmed with a sigh. This is where I got the first impression that he was just a bystander. "I even heard the horrible things she said about you. Saying that she should've abandoned you when you were born? You truly can't get any lower than that." "But she raised me as a single parent ever since my father left her before I was born," I replied. "She always looked after me and told me many times that she loved me up until now...But..." I was beginning to tear up once again. "Maybe," I continued. "She was just hiding her true feelings from me. Maybe she always hated me for who I am...Just like how I've hated myself for being overly-emotional at times; how I wished that I was completely emotionless so that I wouldn't have to feel the pain." "Why would you say that?" he asked in concern. "It's no crime to feel overly-emotional at times! Everypony does! It's part of pony nature! Besides, if you were emotionless, you might as well just be a robot." "I don't care!" I finally bawled as I hung my head down in despair. "Anything's better than staying how I am now!!" Thus, my cry echoed throughout almost the entire street until it was drowned out by the sound of chocolate rain. After a few seconds, that was the only sound I could hear apart from my own sobbing. I truly couldn't take it anymore. I didn't want to be myself anymore. "Well," he sighed finally breaking the silence. "I don't normally fulfil others' requests as it is not part of my job. But since you're one of the first ponies I've ever felt sorry for in a long time, then I shall grant you your wish; I'll free you from the pain of emotion." "You will...!?" I gasped immediately looking back up to him. I was certain that I wasn't hearing things. He was willing to actually make me emotionless? "How!?" "With magic, of course," he quickly added. "Under one condition, however." "Y-Yes?" I asked. "Wh-What is it? I'll do anything!" "It's nothing much," he confirmed as he knelt down towards me and gently placed his hands on both sides of my head as if he was going to massage them. "No big errand or anything. I won't even charge you a single bit. I just want you to listen carefully to what I'm about to tell you and remember it. Can you do that for me?" "I will," I nodded desperately. "I'll listen to every word!" "Very well then." Thus, he looked deeply into my eyes as he spoke; the colour of his eyes changing to a swirling pattern of blue, green and yellow circles whilst doing so. "It's impossible for creatures to become completely emotionless. For without emotion, Equestria would be lifeless. Emotion is what motivates us; drives us to take action and do things. For without emotion, we would feel like doing absolutely nothing." Thus, upon parting his words of wisdom, not only did I feel like my tears were drying on their own, but I felt like all of the ache and pain in my heart was slowly fading away along with all the emotional energy inside me. It all slowly faded away into nothingness like water going down the drain of a sink until eventually every last drop is gone. After a few seconds, he then gently removed his hands from my head. With that, all of the muscles in my face and body completely relaxed. And, for the first time in my life, I felt...entirely...empty. ...Emotionless. ...Numb. "Well?" he beamed as he quickly stood up. "How do you feel now?" "I...don't know," I spoke; my words simple and my tone of voice monochrome. "I...barely feel...anything." "Do you feel sad?" he asked. "A little bit, yes," I replied; my tone of voice not changing. "Sad that my mother no longer accepts me. But that doesn't bother me anymore. I'm old enough to take care of myself now." "Do you feel angry?" "Just a bit, yes; angry towards my parents for rejecting me like trash. But what's done is done now. I don't need them in my life anymore." "Do you feel...happy?" "Yes. Quite happy; happy that I no longer feel the pain of emotion in my heart; happy that I can finally live without sorrow, fear and anger. I've prayed for so many years for this day to come. And now that is has come, I ask for nothing else." "I'm so glad to hear that I've made you happy," he beamed clapping his hands. " Now that I've granted your one and only wish, I hope you live the rest of your life happily ever after!" "I will," I replied with a slight smile. "Thank you, Mr..." It was at this very moment that I remembered that I never asked him his name. "Discord," he replied as he briefly glanced at an old pocket watch he apparently got out of nowhere. "Just Discord; that's what everypony calls. And, there's no need for thank me, son. It's all in a day's work." Thus, Discord began to flap his unmatching wings and lifted his feet off the ground. "Well then, I must be off!" he continued waving goodbye with an earnest smile. "Twilight Sparkle will be here with her friends any minute now, and I wouldn't want to keep them waiting. Take care of yourself, son! Do svidaniya!" Thus, with a snap of his fingers and a flash of light, he was gone. "Do svidaniya, Discord," I whispered. That was the last I ever saw of Discord. What happened next? Well, let's just say that I was left to aimlessly wander through the warped Ponyville alone. On the way, I passed several dancing buffaloes, small long-legged animals, floating buildings, even a few ponies acting strangely in public. But none of that phased me. I was, of course, at the time, too emotionless to care about anything; least of all my mother. I even forgot that she ever existed. That is, until Twilight Sparkle and her friends ultimately defeated Discord and set everything back to normal. At that moment, everything came rushing back; my happiness, my excitement, my melancholy, my fear, my frustration and, most importantly, my memories. My memories of my experiences, my childhood, my education, my friends, and, finally, my mother; the mare who looked after me and raised me all on her own. Upon remembering who I am and who she is, I instantly became anxious to know if she was back to normal too. Thus, having walked pretty far, I rushed back home constantly worrying that about how she would react to seeing me again after inadvertently kicking me out of the house. Eventually, there I saw her waiting for me outside the house. She must have been worrying about me too. As soon as our eyes finally met, neither of us could say how overjoyed we were to see each other again back to how we were. At the time, neither of us even knew that Discord was pulling our strings the whole time even if he was genuinely trying to help me, which I doubt. All that mattered was that everything was back to normal once again. Day XX/XX/XXXX 24 Hours Before Death Ponyville Hospital Mental Health Rehabilitation Ward Ponyville Like I said, there are many things I remember that I wish I could forget. But, the more I think back to the day I met Discord face-to-face, the more sense I start to make out of my homicidal dreams. On the day I met him, I honestly thought that he was trying to help me. And the fact that he took my emotions away just to grant my "wish" only strengthened my first impression on him. Maybe that's why, after my traumatic Princess Gaia dilemma, I believed that Discord would've been the only one who would understand my feelings at the time. Maybe that's why I was so desperate to release him believing that he would "help" me again. Regardless, and I can never say this enough times, I'm thankful that it was all just a dream; a sick and psychotic dream, but a dream nonetheless. But, if it wasn't a dream, would Discord still try to help me? ...Probably not. TURN OVER PAGE