//------------------------------//
// Daring Do's Last Stand 
// Story: When suddenly... !!! 
// by Crowquill Symphony 
//------------------------------//

	Dash did one final search around the house, making sure everything would be perfect for her evening with Big Macintosh. Apple Bloom was out with the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Granny Smith had settle down for a nap outside, Applejack was busy in the fields, the doors were all shut, the curtains drawn over the windows, and finally the door to the room they shared was locked. 
Everything was set up perfectly, and there was no chance of anypony interrupting them. No chance of anything going wrong. She giggled slightly as she thought about the things she hoped to do with her loving husband, stopping as she heard his heavy hoof steps coming down the hall. 
He entered the room wearing his usual calm demeanor, but just from looking in his eyes Dash could see the passion and desire hiding within the stallion. His mane hung down from his head and neck, still moist from him freshening up just moments before. Dash gave a coy grin and trotted over, swaying her hips seductively as she went. 
“So, what are you in the mood for Mac?” She was radiating lust, and his desires were just as plain. He jerked his head slightly, motioning for her to look. She gazed over, wondering what he meant when her eyes locked on the small wooden chest. Immediately she began to worry.
“You do realize we’ve gotten caught almost every time, right?”
“Eeyup.”
Dash looked at the chest, going over the contents within. “You still want to try?” 
“Eeyup.” 
They stared longingly into each other’s eyes, completely silent for the moment. After a minute Dash gave a small laugh. “All right. Let’s do this.” 
They opened the box and removed the contents, smiling as they were filled with faint nostalgia and longing. Mac pulled on a small khaki vest, a black mane wig, and a tiny mustache. He gave a few small growls while trying to get into character. 
Dash too donned a wig and a vest, though she squirmed and groaned as she put on the vest. “Seems tighter than usual. Mac, have I gained weight?” 
Mac turned to her, mind racing and pushing a million different outcomes to this question. The worst answer would be to stay silent, and he honestly hadn’t noticed her putting on any weight. “Nnnope.” 
She smiled and pulled on her pith helmet. “Thanks. Alright, let’s do this!” 

~*~*~*~

Daring Do braced herself against the hastily erected barricade, pushing hard to keep Ahuitzotl and his cats at bay. With every strike she felt her strength failing her and her will being chipped away. This was it; her last stand, her final adventure. Another strong blow shattered some of the stone nearby her and a thought entered her mind. She wished he was here.
She missed him so much, from his small mustache to his tight, strong muscles. She missed his accent, his mane, his eyes, and everything else about him. As another blow sapped what little strength remained in her body she saw a visage of him in her mind, and his name escaped her lips as a whisper. 
“Risky…” She hit the floor, weak and exhausted, unable to continue fighting. She shut her eyes tight and waited for Ahuitzotl to break through and finish her off. But it didn’t come. She opened an eye, glancing around for the paws of his war cats, but there was no sign of them, or of Ahuitzotl himself. She managed to pull herself up and turn to face her barricade. 
It was still there, though the top had chipped away enough that a single pony might be able to fit through. If she wasn’t so tired…
But then he came. His coat was slick with sweat, and small nicks and bruises covered his dirtied body. Daring didn’t care; he could have crawled through a mud pit, she wouldn’t have given it a second thought. She pushed forward with her last ounces of strength, grabbing him in her forelegs. “Risky! I’ve never been happier to see you!”
He pulled her into a tight hug. “Senorita Do, I could never abandon you. You see, when we were attacked by the Equadorian Pirates, I faked my own death so that I could sneak up upon that hijo del puta Ahuitzotl.” He planted a quick kiss on her lips before continuing, “I did it all for you, senorita Do.”
She smiled and lay down on the floor, happy to rest now. He lay beside her, panting just as hard but still keeping his eyes on her. A thought entered her head and she pulled herself atop the prone stallion. “Y’know, we still haven’t plundered this temple’s dungeon,” she said in as sultry a voice as she could manage, “and I think I have enough steam in me for a last stand.” 
He smiled back. “Sí, senorita Do.”
“Call me Daring.”
He leaned in at her. “Sí, Daring.” They kissed, a kiss of true lovers who couldn’t care about anything else at the moment. They kissed passionately and quickly, hooves stroking each other’s bodies as the heat within and between them grew. She felt something rising beneath her and she grinned. 
“Quite the stud, huh?”
“He’s always up for,” Risky paused and chuckled before continuing with, “a bit of temple exploring.”
They shared one more kiss and prepared to perform the deed, Daring lowering herself onto Risky Hooves’…
The sound of a burst of magic outside their door and the furious knocking that followed jerked them from their fantasy. The couple groaned in unison and Dash pulled off the wig and went to the door, grumbling angrily under her breath. She pulled it open to reveal Twilight Sparkle with an expression crossed between concern and pure bliss. 
“Dash! I’m glad to see you! I had tried to talk to you at work, but they told me that you had called in sick, so of course I had gotten worried and decided to come here and then Applejack told me you were in the house…”
A hoof to the mouth stopped the unicorn’s rant, and Dash gave a deep sigh. “Twilight. What is it?” she grunted.
Twilight nodded. “Right, well, I looked up those little symptoms you had been telling me about earlier, and double checked with Nurse Redheart…”
“TWILIGHT! GET ON WITH IT!” Dash screamed, more than simply angry at the unicorns untimely interruption and inability to get to the point.
“I heard you were sick and wanted to make sure that your foal would be okay.” Twilight said. 
Dash froze, one eye twitching and her jaw just slightly agape. Twilight began to worry if she had truly upset her friend, and Big Macintosh peeked his head into the doorway to see what had petrified his wife. Just as soon as the stillness had come, it broke, and Dash began to scream. 
“SON OF A BI-”

~*~*~*~

Dear Princess Celestia:
Today I learned that if a friend is truly angry, it might not be the best time to drop world shattering news on them. I also learned that sometimes two ponies in love need uninterrupted private time, and that if you drop said news on them while they’re trying to get this time, then you should expect severe consequences. 
On a related note, Rainbow seems to have picked up a few apple bucking tricks, as I have been unable to sit for the past six hours. 
Your personal student,
Twilight Sparkle