//------------------------------// // "Twilight eats a sandwich." Birthday Request RK_Striker_JK_5 // Story: Drabble Kaboom! // by Alex Warlorn //------------------------------// " Twilight eats a sandwich? " It was a beautiful perfect day in Equestria, the Princesses were on the throne, the Flim Flam brothers, Gladmane, and Lightning Dust, Steve Gallop, and Canterlot's number one food critic were all reformed thanks to Fluttershy's new villain reform program (if she could do it with Discord, who had tortured ponies for fun, it made no sense she couldn't with Euqestria's jerks and frauds). Ahuizotl was blasted to stone and his pieces pulled into the Darkness-Between after Daring Do thwarted his scheme to release the Beast From Beyond to destroy Equestria, and Garble got eaten by a Roc after trying to get revenge on Spike by manipulating his sister Smolder. The sirens were back in Equestria, but defeated and now imprisoned in the dungeon of King Leo of the seaponies. As for Queen Chrysalis, she ruled now one tiny run down castle with the changelings still loyal to her surrounded on all sides by Thorax's mutant changelings. The CMC had pooled their efforts and visited Cozy Glow in Tartarus, determined to reform her visiting her on a regular basis. Princesses Celestia and Luna had mentioned about something called the 'The Second Return of Tambelon' but that was for another day. Today, Twilight had what she loved to do more than anything besides hanging out with her friends... organizing books! So many new books as part of an exchange between Equus and the human world! (And maybe trading Valentine Day cards with a certain blue haired human (and having had to have it explained to her it was their version of Hearts and Hooves Days). And now all those books were now indexed, catalogued, and neatly stored in Ponyville's NEW public library (just because she didn't live in the library anymore didn't mean Ponyville didn't need one). She was giddy thinking of all those ponies who'd be renting new books and expanding their education. And now she was in the kitchen, making herself a nice daisy sandwich... she dared thinking nothing could wrong today. There was when there was a knock at the door, followed by Spike's voice. "TWILIGHT! I think you really outta come to the front door!" Twilight sighed, some things never changed. What she found... a contingent of pony maids and Royal Guards, all of them wearing her cutie mark rather than Luna or Celestia's emblem. At the front of the Royal Guard was the pony version of Flash Sentry. "Princess Twilight Sparkle! Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Princess Cadence, Princess Flurry Heart, Princess Skyla, Princess Sunset Shimmer, and Princess Trixie, have decided it's time that as a princess that you had your own Royal Guard and house-keepers like a proper Princess!" How Trixie had got saddled as the Alicorn Princess of the diamond dog kingdom of Diamondia Twilight would never know. "Luna bribed the others by promising their favorite dreams if they agreed to this didn't they?" "I can neither confirm nor deny My Princess," Flash Sentry bowed. "Please don't bow." "Protocol says I have to." "Well I'm changing protocol!" "Shall I fetch the necessary paperwork princess?" asked one of the maid ponies. Twilight sighed, already knowing was awaited her was a tower of dead-trees that would've given the deer heart-attacks on sight. "Yes." "At once!" The maid ran off. "In the meantime Princess," said another of the maids, one with a pretty red mane. "We would like a schedule for our responsibilities in maintaining your castle." "But the castle doesn't NEED upkeep! It's magic!" "Yeah and that magic is called 'Spike!'" The dragon injected. "Welcome board ladies. Come on Twilight, you get to write a schedule... don't tell that doesn't sound just great?" Spike said like he was tempting an addict with Witch-Weed. Princess Twilight trembled. "B-but! Certainly there are other things you can do for Equestria besides be my guards and servants! I've gotten just fine without guards or maids before!" "You have, but I haven't, this place is WAY bigger than the library was, and remember when Starlight snuck in here without trouble and created a dozen or so new universes as part of her revenge? Would've been a lot easier with guards!" Twilight felt a headache coming on, maybe making a nice new work schedule with lots of check-lists would be just what the doctor ordered. "Fine! But not Princess, just Twilight. I don't want to be your princess, I want to be your friend." "Princess Celestia was right, she did say that within five minutes of meeting us!" proclaimed the maid with the pretty red mane. "Princess Trixie bet half an hour." "Princess Luna bet ten minutes!" "Princess Cadence bet ten-seconds!" "Never gamble against Princess Celestia," Princess Twilight said sagely. "The other princesses all owe her a hundred bits!" "Well come in, I was about to have a daisy sandwich, I can make lunch for-" "Please Princess! I mean Twilight! Allow us!" Said the pretty red-haired maid, who Twilight finally noticed was a pegasus as she flew right past Twilight, seemingly instinctively knowing where the kitchen would be, the other maids following right behind her. "So... uh," Flash Sentry rubbed the back of his head. "Should me and the guys break for lunch too? Or should we try and figure where all the dangerous magical artifacts are? Or do you want to show us where the Friendship Dungeon is first?" "It's not a dungeon! It's just the basement!" Twilight exasperated. Twilight sighed, again. "Follow me. Spike? Spike!" "He left with the maids," Flash Sentry explained. "What? Oh come on." Twilight led the others to the kitchen, finding Spike talking to the maids. "And never show off snakes, lady-bugs, or quesadillas to her! And never ever mention how she eats like a pig when it comes to hayburgers!" "SPIKE!" "OH! Hey Twilight!" Spike said sheepishly. "Just explaining the maids some dos and don'ts! I mean, now that you finally have an actual cleaning staff around here and my wings mean I'm legally an adult by dragon-law... I was thinking maybe I could finally go on that date with Rarity and help her with becoming an Alicorn before she dies of old age. I have less than a hundred years to help her make it happen after all!" "Spike! That! You! AGH!" The pretty red-maned maid swooped in... presenting Twilight Sparkle with a daisy sandwich. "Please try the sandwich princess! I mean Twilight!" Twilight snorted, took the sandwich in her telekinesis, and tore a bit off... and her eyes dilated and filled with her namesake. "This is... the most wonderful daisy sandwich I've ever had!" Twilight noticed the maid's cutie mark was indeed, a sandwich. "Thank you Princess! I mean Twilight! Princess Celestia thought I'd be a fine addition to your staff!" "What's your name?" "B.L.T.!" "WELL B.L.T. you're officially head maid!" "Twilight, I am unworthy!" "Do you think I WANTED this princess job? I just wanted to be left to my books and my friends. But we gotta work with the hoof we're dealt!" "Let me just go write that one down for your memoirs!" Spike said, hopping off to do just that. ~Fin