The bright light that nearly blinded young Scootaloo faded as a wall rose up behind her, cutting off the path to the elevator. There was officially no turning back now. She saw a door labeled “Trial I” and opened it, stepping into an extremely dark room.
“Hello?” she called out. She carefully stepped forward into the darkness, and immediately had a bright spotlight shine upon her. “Gah! Okay, I’m sick of all the light tricks!”
“Oh, are you, dearie?” came a posh mare’s voice.
“Rarity?”
“Ah, you’re familiar with my descendant?” Another spotlight came on, illuminating the catwalks above Scootaloo and revealing a tall and stunning white unicorn, with a flowing purple mane. She wore immaculate jewelry, a cape of the finest fur, and a large crown. “I must admit, little Rarity might be quite lovely, but nopony can ever come close to my majesty!”
Scootaloo just stared at her, thoroughly unimpressed. “And you are?”
The mare’s eyes opened. “What?! You do not recognize the ruler of unicorns, the most beautiful of ponies, the sole founder of Equestria?! I am Princess Platinum!” She struck a dramatic pose as more spotlights highlighted her.
“That’s very nice,” Scootaloo said in a flat tone. “Now can we get on with the trial?”
Platinum sighed. “Fine.” She lit more of the lights on the catwalk and finally revealed where Scootaloo was: a theater stage. The filly faced the curtain and started to hear cheers.
“What?”
The curtain opened, and Scootaloo saw hundreds, perhaps thousands of ponies, stomping their hooves and shouting praises.
“Woo-hoo!”
“You rock!”
“Go Scootaloo!”
She blushed. This was a feeling that she had wanted to experience for so long, to be loved and accepted for who she was by many ponies.
“Yeah!”
“Stay awesome!”
“We love you, Scootaloo!”
It was enthralling, really. These ponies were cheering her as if she were the greatest pony who ever lived, and she hadn’t even done anything!
Wait.
She hadn’t done anything.
“You’re the best!”
“Keep it up, Scoots!”
“Don’t stop!”
“Stop what?!” Scootaloo screamed it, but the cheers drowned her out. Suddenly, she was hit with a realization. “You don’t love me!”
“Yeah!”
“Go Scootaloo!”
“Shut up!” Scootaloo began to panic, getting more and more frustrated with the false praise. As she screamed to be heard, the cackling of Princess Platinum broke through to her ears.
“What’s the matter, dearie?” she said, voice dripping with sarcastic concern. “Did you realize that no matter how much praise you get, you are still a mere filly with no talent?” The Princess’ haughty cackle was like a knife slicing through Scootaloo’s softened ego. Her hooves pressed firmly against her ears, the filly managed to block out some of the noise.
“Stop it, stop it, STOP IT!” Scootaloo kept shaking her head, anything to distract her from the noise surrounding her, yet the sound of the Princess managed to break through. The constant crowing laughter echoed in her head, transforming into that of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, the two fillies she was constantly tormented by in school. Upon opening her eyes, she saw the audience full of clones of the two, laughing at her alongside Princess Platinum.
“Look at her!” one of the many Silver Spoons cried. “Throwing a tantrum like a foal!”
“I know!” a Diamond Tiara responded. “What’s a matter, Scoots? Can’t handle a little laughter?”
“I thought you won an award for comedy,” another Spoon continued.
“Yeah,” a different Tiara added. “You oughta be used to the sound of everypony laughing at you by now!”
A Silver Spoon laughed heartily. “And you still don’t have your cutie mark! What a loser!”
“Totally!” said a Diamond Tiara from the middle of the audience. “I mean, you’re such a complete failure, you couldn’t even get a cutie mark for dying!”
With that, the room fell into total silence. Even the Princess stopped her laughter to join the other ponies in directing a solid glare at the originator of the comment.
“What?” the same Tiara said.
“That was so not cool,” another Diamond Tiara reprimanded.
“That’s just, like, exceedingly cruel,” scolded a separate Silver Spoon.
“I mean, wow.” A Diamond Tiara shook her head. “We’re mean, but we’d never stoop that low.”
Scootaloo shook her head and gathered her thoughts while everypony else was busy being disgusted with Diamond Tiara no. 58’s comment. She needed to come back, and hard. “Oh, yeah?” she said, as several of the filly clones turned into different ponies once more. “At least my special talent isn’t being a spoiled brat!”
The audience, now mostly different ponies once more, gasped as the now sole Diamond Tiara clone was taken aback. “Wh-what did you say?”
“You heard me!” The pegasus filly stood up once more. “You’re nothing more than a stuck-up, stupid pony with no real special talent!” The crowd gasped once more as Scootaloo loaded up another shot. “In fact, I bet that the only reason you have a cutie mark is because your daddy bought it for you!”
A collective howl from the audience prompted the Diamond Tiara to stomp down to the stage. “Oh, yeah?! Well, at least we can afford things!” She stepped right up to Scootaloo and fired back. “I saw your mom talking to my dad the other day. She needed a loan for the mortgage on that cardboard box you live in!”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Scootaloo said as she backed up a bit. “What’d you say about my mama?”
Princess Platinum conjured up a bucket of popcorn and took a seat in the front row. “This is gonna be good.”
“I said,” Diamond Tiara began, “your mama’s so poor, she has to wash your paper plates!”
“Ooh!” Princess Platinum leaned in. “That was okay, but let’s see how the pegasus comes back.”
“Well...” Scootaloo thought for a moment before inspiration struck. “Well your mama’s so ugly, ponies dress up like her for Nightmare Night!”
“Hm,” the Princess smiled. “Standard, but still decent.”
“Ha!” Tiara turned her nose up. “Your mama’s so poor, she can’t afford to put her two bits into a conversation!”
“Your mama’s so ugly, she went to take a bath and the water jumped out!”
“Nice one!”
Tiara whipped her head around to the audience member that commented and scowled before turning back. “Your mama’s so poor, I kicked a rock against a trash can and she popped out asking who knocked!”
“Your mama’s so ugly, it looks like she went bobbing for hay fries!” The audience winced, and the barb seemed to physically hurt Diamond Tiara, whose leg buckled. “Your mama’s so ugly, when she goes to the kitchen, rats jump on the table and start screaming!”
The audience let out a cheer as the Tiara clone fell over in pain. Princess Platinum rose from her seat. “What are you waiting for? Finish her!”
“Finish her! Finish her! Finish her!”
Scootaloo took a breath as the crowd chanted. She looked Diamond Tiara square in the eye, who seemed ready to welcome the finishing blow. She put her hoof forward, deeply inhaled, and let out her final statement. “No.”
The audience was stunned into silence. Princess Platinum merely smiled and asked, “Why not? She is at your mercy.”
The pegasus shook her head and turned to her questioner. “I’ve already sunk to her level. I don’t need to go lower. Defending myself and my family is one thing. Attacking her when she’s already beaten is just... dumb.”
The room remained quiet for a moment, before one audience member began to stamp his hooves. Then another joined in, and another. Soon, there was a thunderous applause and Scootaloo smiled, taking a bow, and one by one, the audience began to disappear, until only Princess Platinum was left clapping her hooves.
“Well done!” the Princess said. “A magnificent performance! Far enough to protect your pride, yet stopping just short of being a total cretin.”
“Thanks!” Scootaloo galloped off the stage, looking for a way out. However, she found none and began to panic, running all around the area. She climbed the catwalks, scaled the stairs, and probed the orchestra pit, all to no avail. “Oh, no! Am I trapped here? Did I not pass? Is this another test? What do I do?”
“Child, child, calm thyself. Come here.” Scootaloo looked at the Princess before stepping back on the stage. The regal pony rubbed her chin for a moment. “Actually, take two steps back.” The filly obliged. “And a little to the left. No, no, the other left. There! Now, I can help you get out of here.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘Pride goes before a fall’?”
“Um... yeah?”
“Well, since this was a test of Pride,” said the Princess as she put her hoof on a lever that seemingly appeared out of nowhere, “here comes the fall!” She pulled the lever and began cackling madly, but upon opening her eyes, saw a very unamused Scootaloo hovering above a hole in the ground. “Oh. Right. Pegasus. This is awkward.”
“Yeah, your clue was kind of obvious,” Scootaloo sarcastically said as she fluttered there with her forelegs folded.
“Er, would you be a dear and float on down?”
Scootaloo sighed. “Fine.” She slowed the flapping of her wings and began to descend as Princess Platinum resumed her manic laughter. “No,” the pegasus interrupted.
“But I was just--”
“NO.”
“Oh, you’re no fun anymore!” The Princess pouted as Scootaloo finally lowered enough for the trapdoor to be closed. “Finally! AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“The filly’s right,” came a voice from what seemed to be an intercom. “That’s really annoying.”
“Shut up, Jason!”