Dan sprinted out of the turbolift when it got to the proper deck. The lights in this section of the ship were still glowing red, flickering in some spots. The damage to the ship was widespread; ruptured power conduits, blown-out lighting fixtures and electronic panels. Everything in the ship was intricately tied together, like organs in a body. The ship was ailing, but still had life in it. Like Dan, however, it was getting exhausted.
At that moment, Dan was feeling a bit more exhausted. He braced himself against a bulkhead and said,
"We... we have... advanced technology. Magic. Two... or like, five different kinds of teleportation," he steadied himself. "AND I STILL END UP RUNNING EVERYWHERE!!!" He punched the wall of the ship. His fist hurt.
The foodimals skittered past him while he caught his breath. A few of them stopped, looked up at him with their tiny, innocent little eyes.
"Prrrrr."
"I know, I know. I'm going." Time was precious. In less than four minutes, the Genesis Device would detonate, wherever it was. Dan and crew had to launch the torpedo and get the ship outside of the blast radius before that happened. Which, was another problem in and of itself, considering the ship's engines had been destroyed and there was barely enough power for life support. But Dan only dealt with one problem at a time, as was his policy.
The interior structure of the Danfiant, the framework which held the ship's hull, components and compartments together, was still mostly intact even if the ship had about a dozen holes in it courtesy of Barro. From the outside, the ship resembled a burnt piece of metal, like a warped soda poptop lid that someone stabbed repeatedly with a soldering gun. It was lucky enough Dan hadn't run into any rooms where the hull had breached.
"AAAahhh!" And then he did. Opening the door to the transporter and cargo access revealed that the access hall was gone. Technically, pieces of it were scattered over several kilometers to the ship's keel. At that moment, however, nothing was in front of Dan, and he very nearly stepped into the void of space.
"JEEZUS GAWD," Dan pushed himself away from the doorway. There was no vacuum thanks to Starfleet engineering's atmospheric containment fields, part of the life support systems that also kept the gravity and air flowing, but it was still dangerous. Dan very well could have stepped through the hole in the ship and found himself helplessly floating in space, no air or gravity to speak of.
He pulled the two doors closed. Grabbing his chest, he steadied himself for a moment. A heart attack was not something he needed. Fingers shaking a tad, he pointed at one of the foodimals.
"You."
"Prrrrr."
He pointed back at the door. "Go get tape. Cordon this hall off, all of it."
The foodimal stared back at him blankly. "Prrrrr."
"I don't know where you're supposed to find tape! This is a spaceship. They probably have tape somewhere. Go get it done."
"Prrrrr." The foodimal waddled away. Which foodimal it was and whether or not it actually obeyed Dan, or even understood him, I'll leave up to you. Dan apparently spoke fluent adorablese(adorable-ease), which allowed him to comprehend the vast and cute purrs and raspberries of cute critters like Fluffle Puff, Mr. Mumbles and others like the foodimals. Adorablese was taught as an elective at San Garry's Mod's very own Junior State Junior College for Juniors. Dan had not attended there(he attended Adam's College in California) but he did frequently steal their textbooks. Overpriced pieces of garbage that they were.
Dan climbed up one of the Jeffries Tubes into a maintenance shaft to bypass the damaged hall. He had to crawl, but he made it through to the other side, and eventually to the torpedo room.
The foodimals weren't nearby, but he didn't care. Hopefully they were doing something else productive, like staying out of his way. The doors opened and he was greeted with... nothing.
"Oh, what gives?! Why does NOTHING work on this ship that's supposed to?!" Dan exclaimed. The Genesis Torpedo was not in the torpedo room. Neither was the roof of the torpedo room, which was exposed to space. The launchers and several photon torpedoes, however, were intact and ready to fire. Unfortunately, Genesis was not among them, which was clear by the lack of a bomb that was about to detonate.
Dan was about to frustratedly beat up something else when a foodimal tugged at his pant leg. "Prrrr! Prrrr!"
"What? You know where it is?"
The tiny foodimal nodded. "Prrrrr." Looking down, Dan saw a trail of foodimals leading out of the room and down the hall. He didn't hesitate- he ran after them.
The trail thankfully ended close by, right at the crew quarters. Specifically, the captain's quarters. The doors opened automatically, the crew quarters being closely supported by life support, and there was the Genesis Device.
On the bed. A king-sized bed. That clearly had been slept in recently.
"FINALLY!" Dan exclaimed. Relieved, he stepped forward and the toe of his shoe hit something. He looked down to see a Federation phaser pistol on the floor. Along with a Starfleet officer's uniform, just the shirt. Looking around the room, Dan noticed several clothing items tossed about. And his nose definitely detected the scent of scented candles. Finally, he remembered exactly who he left in charge of the ship to repair it after he shot it down.
"Shining and Cadence," Dan said. He looked at the glowing Genesis Device propped up in the bed. "OH MAI GAWD."
"Prrrr."
"LOOK AWAY! LOOK AWAY, INNOCENT CREATURES OF PLASTIC!!" Dan yelled. "Horrible, horrible things have happened here!"
Trembling, his hands reached down to pick up the fallen shirt. "Damn it... that's right. They're both NERDS in this story! And they've been canoodling in MY SHIP!" He pointed at the torpedo. "THEY'VE BEEN CANOODLING ON TOP OF MY BOMB!!!"
"Prrrrr."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!" Dan screamed and ran out of the room. He ran several times, back up and down the corridors, strangely abhorred at the thought of romantic intimacy between a married couple, a nerdy married couple, aboard his vessel happening without his knowledge. As opposed to what he and Chrys have been up to since like Episode 14, but hey, Dan is in fact a bit of a hypocrite.
After about the third time, Dan remembered he didn't have time for this. "Okay, foodimals? I need you all to do Dan a favor."
The foodimals were silent.
He smiled at them, a collection of foodimals assembled in front of him. "Hi pals. Okay, see, Uncle Dan needs a favor. He needs all of YOU to carry the torpedo in the... the bed back to the torpedo room for him so that he doesn't have to touch or think about geeks having sex on his bomb. Okay?"
Again, the foodimals were silent. Not a prrrr was heard from them, which was their way of saying, "Yeah, nah dude."
Dan frowned. "Fine. But! I'm using at least four of you as gloves!!" Dan reached down and grabbed the nearest foodimals. They squirmed, but offered no objection.
Dan pulled the device through the door and back down the hallway. Now, for better or worse, he knew how Flurry Heart had been conceived. Even though she was not born yet(in this story). Either way, Shining Armor and Princess Cadence had just made Dan's list.