“… but gummy didn’t want to be held down, so we had to feed him candy instead!” said the bubbly and all too ecstatic Pinkamena Diane Pie.
I groaned in annoyance for the fifth time that hour. After her introducing herself and everypony in Ponyville, making my brain hurt with all the new pony names, she then proceeded to tell seemingly random stories about her meaningless life.
She also hugged me a lot. Her affection tastes like I am eating pure sugar coated in chocolate, or at least how I think chocolate would taste like to a pony.
“So Discovery, what brings you to Ponyville?” the cheery mare asked me.
I was caught off guard by her question, before I could stop myself I responded under my breath, “Revenge…” I quickly put a hoof to my mouth and looked around the room, nopony seemed to hear that outburst. Except Pinkamena, she looked downright shocked. I facehoof, I haven’t been plotting revenge for more than a day and already it’s falling apart.
Then the pink pony asked me, “Who is it?” in a whisper so quiet that I couldn’t believe it came from the energetic pony. She didn’t look worried however, which threw me off yet again. What was this mare’s game? Well I couldn’t tell her I wanted revenge on her and her friends.
“uh… well, I can’t tell you that..” I weakly answered. I seriously needed to improve my improvisational skills.
After a moment of her staring into my soul, a huge smile crossed her face before she leaned over to my right ear and said, “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.” At which point she backed up a step, did a motion with her hooves across her chest, and flapped her hooves, before touching one hoof to her eye.
I was both curious and utterly confused. Had the mare just promised, discreetly, that she wouldn’t tell anypony that I was seeking revenge… against her? This was too perfect, I didn’t know whether to be suspicious or thankful to the dear, misguided pony. I chose to at least pretend like I was thankful.
“Thanks Pinkamena, it means a lot.” I tell her, almost completely sincere.
She winked at me, “What means a lot?” I am surprised at how well this mare seems to be able to keep a secret.
She spoke up once more, significantly louder than our hushed conversation. “Hey! Let’s go talk to my bestest friends ever!” She grabbed my tail in her teeth and dragged me across the floor before I could do anything.
I decided that I still hate this mare.
It was not even a minute later when she let go of my tail and I got up from my prone position, un-amusement etched on my face. The rainbow maned one thought it was hilarious. What did she know?
“Hi” I grunted at the six ponies in front of me, trying to make it even more obvious that I wasn’t okay with being dragged by my tail. Everyone seemed to get the message. Except the pony who dragged me in the first place.
“So Covey, these are my bestest of bestest friends! I wanted to save the bestest for last.” She pointed to every one of them, and introduced me, telling me their names, where they lived, what they did, and even their birthday. I could’ve done without the birthdates myself. I ignored the fact that she gave me a stupid nickname. I barely know this mare, and already I’ve surmised that arguing about it would be a lesson in futility. I gotta say I’m getting better at this thinking thing.
As I was making idle chat with the six ponies, I noticed that the yellow one… Fluttershy, was doing her best to avoid my eye contact. Judging by how she seems to be acting, I’m fairly certain that my first impression of her was not only incorrect, but in retrospect really paranoid.
“So umm… Fluttershy was it?” I saddled up next to her while the others were busy discussing who knows what.
The yellow mare nodded her head slightly, but still refused to look at me.
“Uh… so about the whole overreacting and freaking out on you thing…” I had no idea where I was going with that. Fortunately she at least looked in my general direction. Unfortunately she was still silent and I had to figure a way to end my sentence. Somehow I thought I would have been interrupted there and not have to say anything else. I don’t know why though.
“I’m sorry for fainting on you and making you worry and… stuff…” Chrysalis that apology was incredibly awkward, I need more practice apologising to ponies. Not that I want to make any more mistakes.
Fluttershy seemed to perk up a bit at my apology, or at least came out from behind her mane just a bit, “Oh, it’s not your fault, I startled you and brought you inside without telling you first… I could understand you being a little wierded out…” She seemed to shy back into her mane once more.
“Heh, yeah…” We'll go with that.
Right then Pinkie jumped up right next to me and shouted, “Hey Covey! Let’s go play pin the tail on the donkey!” before I could object, I was dragged away from all of Pinkies friends against my will, blindfolded, spun around, and now had to find out where a donkey was to pin her tail back on.
I stumbled around for a few minutes, amidst the chuckles of the citizens of Ponyville, who I could occasionally hear jumping out of the way of my stumbling, bumbling self. I felt frustrated and humiliated.
I really hate this pink pony.
Just as I was about to give up, my hoof struck a hard vertical surface. I pushed the pin in the wall and took off my blindfold.
I had implanted the pin two inches from the muzzles of both Applejack and Twilight, I was facing the complete opposite wall that the donkey is supposed to be on. It was a close call too, if I was just a little bit to the left or right, I could have stuck the pin right into their nose. Wait, I had a chance at nailing their nose! Chrysalis damn it! I stomped on the ground in frustration.
They both looked at me with wide eyes, looking at the pin then back to me.
Damn, I need to apologise to keep up my appearance. I rubbed my temples with my hooves trying to calm myself down. “Uh… sorry about almost hitting you guys.” I tell them, trying to look as sincere as I can through the obvious frustration I was experiencing.
They both laughed nervously. “… Well, no harm done ah guess.” The orange pony replied. She looked like she was trying to convince herself of that more than me.
I need to play this off somehow, I know! “Pinkie!” I yelled.
I saw her turning away from a group of ponies she was talking to and bounce her way over to us. Literally bouncing, like she was a rubber ball.
She stopped right up next to me and tilted her head to an angle that I didn’t know was even possible. “Yes Covey?”
After a second of staring at her neck wondering how she didn’t break it, or if there are any bones in this mare’s body, I shook my head clear of the randomness.
“Why weren’t you keeping an eye on me? I almost hit Twilight in the eye with this pin!”
“Well that’s not very nice, I hope you said you’re sorry.” Pinkie responded with a glare.
“What? I did apologise, and I was blindfolded!” I exclaimed, wings flaring out in anger.
The pink pony was oblivious to my frustration however, “Why were you blindfolded silly?” she asked.
“You put the blindfold on me to play pin the tail on the pony!”
She looked contemplative, “No… I’m pretty sure that was Lyra that put the blindfold on you.”
I grunted at the pony, fixing her with a glare, “I don’t care who put the blindfold on! You spun me around and didn’t even tell me when I was going to run into somepony!”
“You didn’t run into somepony though.” Pinkamena stated.
“But I almost did!” I seethed.
“But you didn’t!” She said in a sing-song voice.
I threw my hooves up in exasperation and stormed out the door. Noting that everypony was staring at me. What do I care? Those stupid ponies and their stupid games. As soon as I got out the front door I took to the sky, I flew up just above the cloud line before leveling out. I looked back to see if I was being followed. I couldn’t see anypony, so I looped back around and headed towards the Library Tree. I glided down to the tree and landed on one of its branches.
I was there brooding for only a few minutes, when I heard a weird noise from right below me. Something beneath me was rhythmically popping. I lean over the side of the branch, wings spread out behind me to keep my balance. Right below me, and currently coming closer, I saw Pinkamena with suction cups attacked to her hooves.
How in Equestria did she find me?
“Hey Covey!” She called up to me and I instantly bolted into the sky and flew off into the distance. I sped as fast as my wings could carry me, making sure to zig and zag through clouds so as to throw off the pink terror. I saw a mountain nearby. At least with a mountain I’ll be able to see her climb up.
“Why are you being so silly Covey?” I heard from right behind me, I turned around to see the pink mare had somehow appeared right behind me. Can this mare teleport?
I sped off once more, my last hiding spot was meant to be able to spot the mare. Yet she found me because I was in plain sight. So I have to find a hiding spot where she won’t be able to find me.
I fly over to the farm at the edge of Ponyville and land near the barn. Looking around for any sign of the pink mare, I quickly hide in a wagon filled with apples. I sit there for a few minutes to catch my breath.
“Oh, are we playing hide and seek? I love hide and seek! You should have told me.” I heard Pinkamena from just to the right of me. I look over to see a pink face an inch from my own.
I scream and take off once more. I had to find a way to shake this crazy mare. Where could I go? I have to find a place where only pegasi could go. That’s it! She can’t find me in the clouds, and Rainbow Dash’s home is made of them.
I speed over to the pegasus’s home. After a rough landing on her porch which I shake off I knock on her door. Please be home, please be home, please be home.
Luckily the door opens to a confused cyan pegasus. “What’re you doing here Discovery?” She asks me.
In between breaths I pant out, “Hiding… from… Pinkamena…”
Rainbow looked at me judgmentally, “Why are you hiding from Pinkie?”
I stop and think for a moment… Why am I running from the pink pony? What can I possibly be afraid of? I shake my head, I’ll think it over when I’m safe inside the house.
“I just need to hide okay.” I plead the pegasus.
She shakes her head, “Well I know from experience that if that mare wants to find you, she will. I don’t know how she moves that fast either. It’s like she teleports or something.”
Just then I heard the noise of wind being pushed out of the way really quickly from behind me. I slowly turned my head around until I saw something that made me sink to my knees. Pinkamena was riding in a helicopter made of candy canes and powered by her hooves.
“That was a good hiding place Covey, but auntie Pinkie has a few tricks up her sleeves.” She exclaimed, somehow managing to strike a pose and power the vehicle at the same time.
“Pinkie you are so random.” Rainbow chuckled from behind me as I sank into the cloud in despair.
Pinkie smiled at Rainbow’s comment then turned back to me, “Hey Covey, I like playing hide and seek and all, but I need to talk to you for one teensy tiny minute.”
I sigh. I might as well get this over with, “All right.” I reply before saying goodbye to Rainbow Dash and fly off with Pinkamena.
We landed by the library, where she hopped off her machine and walked over to me. I tried my best to look as nonchalant as possible, even though I was kind of worried what she would tell me. There was nopony around since the sun was on the horizon, so I was even more worried that this was going to be an interrogation about who I wanted revenge on. I couldn’t possibly tell her that. I wasn’t even really looking her way to be honest.
What she asked me however surprised me, “Um… so, did you not like the party?”
I turned around to look at her fully. What I saw surprised me even more than what she asked. Her colours seemed duller, her eyes were watering, and what surprised me most of all, her big poofy mane was perfectly straight and flowed down her face.
“Um…” I just stared at her stunned at the sudden transformation, “It...uh… I’m just… uh… not comfortable around so many ponies. So I was a little tense.” I told her. It was the actually pretty true; I didn’t feel comfortable with that many ponies around.
“Really? You don’t hate me or anything?” She looked up at me with pleading eyes.
Before I could even think about what I was going to say I blurted out, “Of course not.” I stood there, shocked by what I just said. Pinkie on the other hand seemed to liven up considerably. She gave me a bone crushing hug.
“Okie dokie lokie! Next time I won’t bring so many ponies just for you.” She told me.
Then she gave me a peck on the cheek and hopped back home. I stood there stunned. What did I just say? What just happened as a result? Why do I feel so full all of a sudden?