//------------------------------// // Chapter 8. Vampire research // Story: Final Corruption // by Epsilon-Delta //------------------------------// Twilight sat in the library just an hour before sunrise, surrounded by stacks of newspapers. Maybe just a month ago she would have sheepishly pretended to have gotten up early to come here like the lame dork she was. Twilight adjusted her sunglasses before she went back to looking through her pile of newspapers. Her eyes were still getting more sensitive, which did concern her just a little. She was at the point where even electric lights could sting her eyes without the sunglasses on. She wanted to see an optometrist, but for now… “Twilight?” Mrs. Inkwell’s voice broke Twilight’s concentration. She turned around to see the librarian with her hoof over her mouth. “Is that really you?” Twilight sighed and put down the newspapers. She was starting to get numb to these reactions. It’d been weeks since the last time Twilight came to the public library. Mrs. Inkwell hadn’t changed in the least, but Twilight looked completely different now. Twilight’s hair was spikey now, that was the part they all hated the most. The spikes curve up and forward in a bit of an arc over the front, nearly hiding her horn, and jutted out straighter in the back. But there was more than that. Twilight wore far more accessories these days. Today she wore fishnet stocking on her front legs with seven spike bracelets haphazardly arranged on the left leg only. She had a choker with a large skull charm attached so that the skull rested against her chest. Then her rear hooves were in black leather boots that came up to the joint. Her ears weren’t pierced yet, but that was going to change in just a few days. Twilight was only going to go further with all of this. “Yes. I’m Twilight Sparkle. This is the real me, Mrs. Inkwell.” Twilight opened her forelegs. She knew that just owning it was the easiest way to get through these conversations. “I’m a delinquent.” “But what happened?” She asked, with a little concern to her credit. “You were always so studious!” “And that’s why I’m like this. I’ve done months of research now and I have no choice but to conclude that society is-“ Twilight had no moral reservation with the word, but still hesitated to say it in public. “Society is lame Mrs. Inkwell!” And that made her gasp. “Society stifles all forms of self-expression from artistic endeavors to interpersonal interaction!” Twilight got up to face Mrs. Inkwell. “Culture and tradition are simply the art of weaponizing your loved ones and emotions against you! The aristocratic elites only want us to have an aversion to sugar and fruits so the masses will demand less expensive foods! They swarm us with propaganda and thought-terminating clichés and long work hours in hopes we’ll never think about any of this! Intellectuals are demonized and portrayed in a negative light so nopony listens to them when they expose the lies of the government! The entire school system is a brainwashing factory designed to-!” Mrs. Inkwell slowly, then quickly backed away. Twilight blew a bit of her mane out of her face. Some ponies just didn’t want to think for themselves. She turned back to her studies instead. Twilight barely came here lately. She still spent just as much time studying as always, but lately, she spent all her time studying in Rarity’s library instead. It wasn’t as big as this one, but she did have twenty-two bookcases filled with books. Twilight couldn't take them back home with her because the law was stupid, but she could read them whenever she went to Rarity's house. Banned books held so much more appeal these days. It was like the ponies who wrote them just said whatever they wanted. They were so unhinged that Twilight couldn’t take her eyes off them. They said so many things Twilight never heard of or considered. It was like she’d discovered an alien planet filled with information she couldn’t possibly get in a public library. But there were limits. Rarity didn’t have any old newspapers, for example. Twilight got a tip recently about Pinkie Pie. She knew the exact time and location of when Pinkie went missing and could easily find it in the papers now. All she had to do was find the 'missing' section that was common in towns near the forest. After doing some research on phantasmagorical mitochondria, Twilight came up with a hypothesis. According to her research, phantasmagorical mitochondria had a particularly visible symptom. Namely your hair began to curl up when exposed to sunlight. Pinkie always had long, straight hair for as long as Twilight had known her. But if the story she'd been given about Pinkie was true, Twilight would predict she'd have curly hair in the missing pony photograph. Finally, she found the entry for Pinkie Pie and- She had wildly curly hair, a big poofy blob that ended in a hook. It was missing the black stripes, but Twilight always knew those were dyed on. And poor Pinkie looked so sad in the picture, an emotion Pinkie rarely bothered with. It took Twilight a second to recognize her, but the name 'Pinkie Pie' was right there. Twilight was at once relieved to see they hadn't been lying about that, but at the same time strangely disappointed they hadn't been lying. Because if they had been lying that would have meant they were vampires who could offer Twilight eternal youth. Her parents did at least try to make some attempt at finding her since Pinkie stayed in the North Gorgeville missing section for almost a year. But Pinkie's entry was also very short. Pinkie Pie. 22. Female. Earth Pony. Cutie Mark: none. Last seen North Gorgeville Hospital. Which meant Pinkie was twenty-seven? Twilight had honestly thought Pinkie was maybe nineteen or twenty, had run away as a teenager, that she was the youngest in the group, not the oldest. Did it even count as running away when you were twenty-two? Pinkie looked younger now than she did in the picture. Maybe it was just because she looked so miserable back then. At least they were telling the truth about Pinkie not having her cutie mark when she ran away. The fact that she didn't get it until she was twenty-three at the least meant there must have been something seriously wrong in her life. Leaving wherever she was clearly was the right decision. It still wasn’t like she was fifty or anything like that, but this is what it was always like! Nothing she found was ever conclusive and for everything, she found proving they weren’t vampires there was something just a little off like this. If they were lying about anything, then Pinkie was the weak strand in the web. Nopony knew Dash or Rarity from when they were younger, but there was lots of information about Pinkie hanging around. Twilight knew where her parents lived but didn’t dare go over there. That would not be cool and Twilight would probably lose her kind-of-in-the-gang status. But besides them, there were still a few ponies around town who knew Pinkie before she met Rarity. Everything they said was consistent with the story about her having phantasmagorical mitochondria. Pinkie used to sleep through all her classes to the point she needed to drop out of the first grade after just a few weeks. She’d faint ‘all the time’ and was incredibly reserved and quiet in general. One pony said he’d never even heard Pinkie speak until she came back with Rarity. So she clearly had what she said she had. But a few things felt a little off in general. Twilight discovered the origin of Rarity's accent after watching a hundred movies. The secret was that it wasn't a matter of where it was from, but when. She'd directly witnessed the way ponies talk change over the centuries and Rarity talked just like unicorns did three to four hundred years ago. So either Rarity was three hundred years old or she just watched a lot of movies and decided to train herself to talk like the ponies in the movies. Giving herself a mysterious and eloquent accent was exactly the sort of thing Rarity would do, so sadly that wasn't as great a clue as Twilight had hoped. And then there was the fact that Twilight ate almost four thousand calories worth of sugar every day now. And she’d lost ten pounds since coming to Ponyville. Admittedly, she was a little pudgy before and felt and looked a lot healthier now. Here colors were more vibrant and she had a little bit of muscle tone since switching to a high-candy diet. But that didn’t sound right at all. Not that she assumed diet advice was the one thing nopony lied to her about. Everything else was a lie, so why not the whole ‘sugar is bad for you’ thing? The fact that she was more physically active than ever could explain the weight loss. All of her friends ate just as much sugar and all of them were fine. Did chocolate even have theobromine in it? Twilight had no idea about anything anymore! Twilight’s worldview was already fractured when she got here, but Rarity jumped out of the woods and shattered it completely and had spent the last few months stomping all the pieces, laughing hysterically as she ground them into a fine powder. And yes, that lead to Twilight adopting a lot of Rarity’s beliefs, but it also backfired on her just a little. This whole experience left Twilight a little too open-minded. She didn’t know what to believe now. Like, well, everything, she now realized, the supernatural was something she'd always dismissed without a second thought. But now she was second-thinking every single thing she'd ever been told. Did vampires exist? Was there some other sort of monster that ponies merely mistook for vampires? Were there things about dark magic Twilight didn’t know? Could there still be necromancers out there? Or chaos magic? Did elementals exist? Did souls exist? Could there be some fourth type of magic Twilight never even heard of, like the hypothetical order magic? Was Celestia the only god left? Twilight couldn’t dismiss anything in her current state. She knew at least why, out of this infinite myriad of possibilities, she was fixated on vampires. It was due to the mere exposure effect. If you see an unexplainable light dancing around the woods, some ponies might make an argument from ignorance that it was a ghost, while others might make the same argument that it was an alien depending on what they were exposed to. But unless you already knew one of those existed, there was no reason to prefer either as an explanation. Having constantly heard of vampires for months, of course her mind would stupidly jump to them as an explanation for the unexplainable. That was what Rarity taught her, anyway. At least that stuff made sense. Or maybe she was frustrated by the lack of information on the subject. Oh, Rarity had tons and tons of books about vampires, more than Twilight would have ever guessed existed. There were stories about vampires of every imaginable kind. Every kind except one. None of the books were about Everfree vampires, the type Applejack was worried about. Scouring the entire approved books list turned up not one single book on the subject. There were books like Stupid Superstitions, but none of them even mentioned Everfree Vampires as far as Twilight could see. And yet somehow everypony in town immediately knew what you were talking about when you mentioned Everfree Vampires or the fruit of eternal youth. Applejack, of all ponies, seemed like the only pony in the entire world that had any books about them. Besides her journals, Applejack did lend Twilight one book filled with openly fictitious stories about Everfree vampires, even Applejack admitted they weren't based on true encounters. It had thirty short stories about it, all of them nearly identical. Some earth pony makes a mysterious new friend who’s super nice to them until one day they offer them some fruit from the forest that grants eternal youth. The earth pony makes some heroic show of refusing the fruit, giving a speech about why eternal youth was bad or tradition was good or something stupid like that. Then their new friend turns into a vampire and eventually either kills the hero or gets killed themselves. It was just that thirty times over with variations here and there. There were only three stories in the book where the earth pony ate the fruit. The earth ponies who did go through with it were always portrayed as horrible people who became even worse afterward. Maybe the most interesting one had a mare who went on to give birth to thousands of monsters with her new, immortal life. The curse that kept them in the forest was something of a blessing for the earth ponies, kept the vampire from coming back. Reading those left Twilight depressed every time. She saw a little of herself in the protagonists, having just made a few close friends for the first time, all of them mysterious. The thought of them suddenly turning on her like the vampires in the book did was too cruel to her. She was already afraid of them dying or moving away, but these stories gave her an even crueler fantasy for her nightmares, of them hating her instead. Twilight’s mind tormented her sometimes. An invasive thought of Rarity with a cruel smile, laughing and telling Twilight this was all just a game for them. They’d never actually cared about her, though it was hilarious she’d ever even thought she could be one of them. And then Rarity would tear into Twilight’s neck, even that game boring them now. And now she wanted to get off this subject! A list of things she needed to look up in official sources built up over the last two weeks. It was her day off and she was going to spend it in the library just like the good old days! The next item on her list: the kinetic potential of distortions in latent magical fields. That was something she could find on the approved book list. There was something she wanted to double-check Rarity on about this whole ‘passive magic’ thing. Twilight decided a long time ago that if the banned and approved books agreed on something, it had to be true. She was still practicing that. Or trying to practice it. The first step wasn’t easy, but Twilight was making progress, getting better at ignoring some magic and focusing on others. Once again, she closed her eyes and tried to feel that draft. Occasionally, she really could feel it but only for the briefest moment and usually only when Rarity cast spells for Twilight to try and practice feeling the wind. Rarity said that Twilight needed to keep practicing until she could feel it for more than just a second or two at a time. There wasn’t any point in trying to cast spells with it until Twilight could feel it non-stop for at least ten seconds. And surprisingly, this time Twilight felt it suddenly and stronger than ever before, but only for the briefest moment before going back to nothing. What caused it to flare up, according to Rarity and the one book she had on the subject, was something disturbing the latent magical fields. Somepony could have just cast a high-level spell, for example, though they could have been miles away. Rarity boasted that she could feel it if anypony anywhere in town cast a significant spell. Twilight got up and looked out the window as if there was a chance she’d see the mage that caused that. It was still dark out there. Her ears perked up a little when she saw one of her friends just down the street. Pinkie looked like she was sniffing around for something. She stopped and looked up at the library, almost like she was looking at Twilight, and considered it before turning away and looking elsewhere for whatever. This was maybe the fourth time she’d seen Pinkie running around just before dawn as if she were looking for something. It was on Twilight’s list of mysteries. The Mystery of Sniffy Pie. Twilight was braver now! She was just going to go out there and ask about it point-blank. She got up and ran outside before Pinkie could get too far away. Outside, she saw Pinkie already down one of the streets and ran after her. “Hey Pinkie!” Twilight ran over to her. “What are you up to? It’s pretty late.” “Oh hi, Twilight!” Pinkie waved to her, welcoming her over. “I’m just out here making sure nopony’s disrespecting our turf, you know?” “Can I come with you?” Twilight trotted up next to her. “I, uh, don’t want anypony disrespecting your turf either.” “Really? That’s great!” Pinkie started walking again, taking Twilight along with her. “You know, most of you daywalkers don’t respect the fact that this is Rarity’s town. But you do, Twitwi! That’s why you’re the cool one and you get to hang out with us!” Daywalker. Every time they called her that, Twilight felt like she was being shoved to the side. “You’re not beating ponies up or anything though, right?” Twilight asked. “Huh? Oh no. I never really have to fight anypony! Our reputation does most of the work. We just like to make sure everypony's degenerating. Like you, Twitwi!” Pinkie ruffled Twilight’s new spikes. “Delinquent Twitwi is so much cooler than dork Twilight was! I wish everypony in town was like you.” “I know!” Twilight felt anger welling up again. She felt like her wound was still so sensitive that the slightest poke at it set her off. “I can’t believe what a lame dork I used to be! Like, I’m gonna deny myself everything good in life and hate everything different cause some bucking dork told me too and I just go with it cause I’m a mindless drone?! How did you ever put up with me?! I can hardly stand all these bucking lameo drones!” There were a lot of ponies in this town Twilight would have considered delinquents when she first moved here. Now she looked down at them as daywalkers. Half the ponies in this town were like drones to her now. Like Mrs. Inkwell, they didn’t want to think about the things Twilight had to say at all! She was impressed the others even had the patience to try with ponies like that. But at the same time she just constantly wanted to argue with all of them, to fight them, show them that Rarity was right too. But almost nopony in this town was open-minded enough for that kind of thing. At best, Twilight's tirades about how broken everything was got nervous laughter out of them. The only ponies willing to have serious debates with her were her friends and she hardly disagreed with them on anything anymore. Twilight looked around for somepony to be angry at. There were a few daywalkers just now getting up. She saw a pair of mares sitting in front of a shop. They looked at Pinkie and Twilight, then very quickly turned away and pretended to talk about something. Twilight got that reaction a lot now. “Hey!” Twilight shouted at them. “Did you even know that the reason they make us watch the same PSA’s hundreds of times in school is that it’s a brainwashing technique?! It's called the illusory truth effect! Did you?!” “Um.” The mare ducked her head and ears down submissively. “No. No, I didn’t. Sorry?” “Yeah! Well-!” Twilight paused, not sure where she was going with this anymore. “Don’t let it happen again, dweeb!” And to back her up, Pinkie jumped halfway up onto Twilight's back and hissed at them. That got them to run inside, Pinkie laughing hysterically at the result. Admittedly, Twilight wasn’t nearly at spreading these ideas to others as Rarity or even Pinkie was. At least not yet. Rarity said she'd get better once she 'calmed down', as if Twilight wasn't exactly as angry as she should be over being deceived and brainwashed her whole life “You’re so funny, Twitwi!” Pinkie laughed and pressed up against Twilight. “That was hilarious! I bet they thought we were total psychos! Like we go around murdering anypony who can't pass a- like a psychoanalysis test thing.” “Yeah! That’s what I was going for.” Twilight blushed, frustrated with herself. “See, hissing is an art form," Pinkie explained. “Hiss at ponies too much and they get used to it. Hiss at them too little and suddenly you’re not the craziest pony in town. I can’t allow that, Twilight!” Pinkie looked like she was sniffing around for something again but gave up on it much faster this time. And that brought Twilight’s mind back to her original mission. “But what are you actually looking for?” Twilight lowered her head to the level Pinkie’s was at and tried sniffing, but she didn’t smell anything. “Do you smell something?” “I smell all kinds of things, Twitwi. I got a real good nose." Pinkie pointed to her nose. "I can tell which ponies have been places recently." “Really." "Yeah! Rarity asked me not to tell this to daywalkers, but you're cool so I'll let you in on a little secret. My senses are ridiculously good, Twitwi. Like- like right now, I can hear what those two are fighting about." Pinkie turned her ear towards a house with the lights still on. "She's saying 'I pay the rent, I make the rules, you can't have a cat.'" Twilight turned her ear to the same house. She could hear just a little bit of muffled shouting, but making out their words would be impossible. Twilight did notice Pinkie always seemed to know what everypony in the house was saying but never thought she was this good. "See, I'm kinda spying on these daywalkers," Pinkie whispered. "And I run right back to Rarity and tell her all their secrets and stuff. Gotta keep an eye out for trouble, you know. Rival gangs or other uh- uh, other gangs! You know? We're really territorial. But we keep trouble out!" "Oh. Like that skull gang you guys got rid of before I showed up?" Twilight asked. "Has there been any trouble since then? Cause I've never seen you get into any fights." “Oh! I can tell you the craziest thing I found so far, sure,” said Pinkie. “There’s this weirdo guy who lives in a rundown shack near the train tracks on the north edge of town. And he was totally up to no good. I dunno what he did, but it was definitely probably evil. I felt it in my gut so he’s gotta be guilty.” “I don’t think a gut feeling proves anything.” “Yeah, that’s what the police said. I don’t normally talk to those dorks and they didn’t listen to me. And I’m not some kind of investigative journalist who can prove stuff or a vigilante superhero, so my hooves are tied. But I did tell him, if he does any no-good on our turf, I’m gonna bite him!” Pinkie made a ‘rawr’ sound and bit the air. It was adorable, but Twilight knew Pinkie got way more intimidating if you weren’t part of her in-group. She probably scared the crap out of that guy. “And my gut says he hasn’t been up to no good since. So I’m like a hero! But yeah, stay away from that guy.” “And that was the worst thing?” “Hey! It was pretty worst! I think. Maybe Just remember that name. 'Rust Bucket'. That's totally gonna come up again and one day you’ll all realize I was totally right. Probably.” Pinkie nodded proudly. “Trust me. You daywalkers are way better off with us around.” That word stung her again. There was only one word that still bothered Twilight and that was ‘daywalker’. They still called her a daywalker and Twilight hated it. Every time it was like a small shove away from them. The three of them were still distancing themselves from Twilight, even if it was ever so subtle and slight. Twilight wanted to believe she belonged somewhere, but there were still a few things making that difficult. “Am I really still a daywalker?” Twilight complained. “I get like fifteen minutes of sunlight every day and only because I have to. I’m the fourth most delinquent pony in town. I can barely stand direct sunlight without my glasses. I know I won’t have any serious problems if I go out during the day, but I think I should at least be an honorary vampire by now. In fact I-“ Twilight hesitated. She wasn’t sure if she was brave enough to finish the thought, but Pinkie was looking at her expectingly now, giving her no real choice. “I kind of feel like I’m almost in the gang already!” Twilight blurted it out, then felt a pang of regret and glanced away. “Right? Pinkie looked away and hummed over that for a moment. “Almost is a good word, Twilight!” She finally concluded. “You need Rarity to give you an invitation to join. That’s how I got in!” That was something, at least. It felt like a step in the right direction. “And how long did it take you to get an invitation?” Twilight asked. “Mm.” Pinkie thought about that one for a minute. “I guess maybe three months?” So Pinkie got in faster than Twilight. “But I was begging and crying for them to let me in the gang since like, the second I met. I saw them and boom! Straight into begging!” Pinkie tapped her cheek repeatedly, slowly recalling the facts to herself. “Oh! If you’re sure you wanna be one of us, maybe you could try bowing down and pathetically begging Rarity for three months straight! Or more. It’s gotta work eventually!” “Maybe.” Twilight wondered if she’d ever get desperate enough to actually do something like that. “Like what am I missing, though? I say buck now!” “Hm?” Pinkie grinned with far too much excitement. “I can think of one thing.” That smile was familiar. Twilight knew what she was talking about. Going into the Everfree Forest. They’d invite Twilight out there every once in a while, and Twilight would shudder and refuse every time. If she ever accepted her friends entirely, that would be the very last thing she accepted. And the way Pinkie got so excited about the idea of Twilight going into the forest bordered on creepy. This was one of those things that made her think maybe they were vampires. “That reminds me,” said Twilight, “there was something else I wanted to ask you about.” “You wanted to come with us?!” Pinkie spun around to face Twilight, bobbing up and down excitedly. “N-no. No. I’m sorry, but I’m not going there.” Twilight felt a little bad about turning her down when she got this excited. She wanted to change the subject fast, though admittedly it wasn’t going to change too much. “But where did everypony hear about Everfree vampires? I went through all your vampire books and none of them are about Everfree vampires. There aren’t any approved books that mention them either. Applejack’s the only one who has any books about them at all.” “Oh! Really? I’m surprised even Applejack has anything written about it. Thought she’d be all superstitious like, you know? Maybe she's less dork than I thought. But it’s cause see, they never write those stories down. Even like, before the bans they didn’t.” Pinkie lowered her voice into an overly dramatic whisper. “That's like max level bad luck." “Really? Why?” “There’s this old saying, if you write something down, you’ll never be rid of it. But us mud ponies are pretty dumb and take that literally.” Pinkie knocked her hoof on her head. “So the idea is if you write a story about a vampire, the vampire’s never gonna leave you alone! If you mention one by name in your story then you can never get rid of her no matter what you do. Even if you die, that vampire will keep haunting your family for generations. Woooooo." And that was kind of what happened to Applejack if you believed her story. Applewood specifically mentioned Rarity by name and then, according to Applejack, Rarity kept coming back until this very day. Though maybe curses were relative. Twilight wouldn’t mind being ‘doomed’ to have Rarity follow her around forever. “But that part’s not even a little true! Silly mud ponies!” Pinkie laughed at them. “That’s why those stories are only passed down from campfire to campfire. The only way you’re gonna hear about that crap is if you find a mud pony who grew up near the forest. A mud pony like-“ Pinkie repeated the word ‘like’ again, this time holding out the ‘I’ and opening her forelegs wider and wider. “You?” Twilight made the obvious guess. “Me!” Pinkie nodded. “I grew up surrounded by mud ponies! I know hundreds of these! I told them all to Rarity and Dash when I met them and they laughed hysterically. You want me to tell you about them?" “Well-“ Twilight absolutely wanted to hear more about this. Stories that took place inside the forest still made her uncomfortable. But she kept telling herself that as long as it was (probably) fiction, it was still okay to hear about it. “Okay.” “Great!” Pinkie held her hoof up like she was giving a mock lecture. “Now see, I hate most of these stories cause the vampire’s always the bad guy and the mud pony’s always the good guy and they always say no to their best friend for some stupid reason! All that’s totally unrealistic. I like the rare ones where the mud pony eats the fruit of eternal youth.” “And what happens then?” Twilight’s ears perked up. "Well they try to make you think it's not a happy ending, but daywalkers get everything backwards. It's great cause you get to live happily ever after with your best friend!" Pinkie declared. “If you eat the fruit of eternal youth, you get to turn into a vampire, you never have to get old and gross and you become immune to dark magic and poison! You could eat all the fruit from the forest you want after that. And the only downside is that you can never go home again.” “Yeah, I heard that part," said Twilight. "They don't usually act like it's a happy ending, though. And the curse isn't very consistent. Applejack always says you burn up if you try to leave the forest, but sometimes your house disappears or everypony you know forgets you and you lose all evidence you ever existed." Twilight considered what might happen to her. She didn't have much of a 'home' to never return to, so the curse wouldn't matter much. But there was one possible scenario that did frighten Twilight when she imagined it. "Hey, if hypothetically you were an Everfree vampire and gave me that fruit, you wouldn't forget about me, right?" Twilight asked. "Because you're the one who gave it to me?" “You know those are just spooky stories, right?” Pinkie asked, looking genuinely concerned. Maybe she could sense Twilight was scared. “You can’t trust every story you hear. A fruit isn't going to make me forget you, Twilight! I used to really believe in those stories too, but then I met Rarity and she explained that the fact that they're never the same means at least most of them aren't true. Or something like that.” "I know," said Twilight, though she really didn't. "But like, if you were a vampire when would you tell me? Cause we're friends, right? I wouldn't tell anypony." And Twilight's heart skipped a beat when she saw Pinkie's reaction to that question. Pinkie glanced away like she felt guilty about something. Maybe, just maybe, about not telling Twilight she was a vampire yet! "Well." Pinkie looked like she was considering what she was about to say more than she normally would have. "You've read a few of those stories! You know how it goes. If the vampire reveals who she is and you don't want to be a vampire too, then, well they can't be friends anymore. And I want to be friends with you, so I wouldn't tell you unless I knew you wanted us to drag you into the forest and turn you into a vampire." Pinkie looked around and swiveled her ears about, checking to see how many ponies were around. "So like," Pinkie came extra close and whispered very quietly. "Would you want to be a vampire? And stay young forever?" Twilight... seriously wasn't sure if Pinkie meant this for real or not. But she decided that she should answer it as if this was for real just in case. "I'd need to know more about how vampires work," said Twilight. "But I thought about the eternal youth thing a lot and I decided I'd want that. And, well, I want to stay friends with you three no matter what so if being a vampire was the only way to do that then yes. Probably." "Daw!" Pinkie laughed. "And to think you used to say you didn't like sweet stuff! I'd totally turn into a vampire to stay friends with you too, Twitwi! Heck, I'd turn into a vampire either way but that's just me! Hey, how do I know you're not a vampire?" "What?" Twilight was taken off guard by the answer. "Why would I be the vampire?" "Well let's see, your name is Twilight Sparkle and that's a vampire name. You mysteriously showed up out of nowhere and conveniently don't know anypony in the whole world. And I can't go out during the day cause my mitochondria suck so there's no way for me to know if you ever really do go out during the day. Heck, you went straight for the ponies who can't go out during the day. Very suspicious." Pinkie gave Twilight a suspicious look. "Hey, you'd tell me if you were a vampire, right?" "What? I-" Twilight sighed and shoved Pinkie away. "Geeze! Were you messing with me this whole time?!" "Haha! Maybe!” Pinkie looked up at the sky, the sun was up higher than Twilight had ever seen her friends out for. “Uh oh! Uh, where are we going, Twitwi? Cause we’re getting kinda far from my house!” “What do you mean where are we going?” Twilight asked. “What do you mean what do I mean?!” “I thought you were taking me somewhere!” “I thought you were taking me somewhere! But wait! How the buck were we deciding where we were going?!” Pinkie stopped in place and looked back towards her house. “This is a crap! I can’t make it home in time now!” “Oh crap! This is bad!” Twilight panicked. What was the protocol for this?! “Uh! Do you need me to throw a blanket over you and walk you home? Or- or call for a doctor? Is there anything I can do?!” “Well, it’s not that crap. See, when you’re a vampire you gotta plan out safe spaces. Lotta abandoned houses in this town!” Pinkie pointed to a for-sale sign. “There’s a place close by nopony lives in. It’s got a cellar! I’ll just have to hide in there until sundown. Easy! Ish.” Twilight didn’t like the idea of Pinkie being stuck in some abandoned cellar all day. “Why not come to my house?” Twilight offered. “If we run, we can get there in maybe fifteen minutes.” “Um!” Pinkie started to think about it, then stopped. “You know what, we don’t have time to think! Let’s just run!” Pinkie bolted in the direction of Twilight’s house and Twilight ran after her. Pinkie was generally much faster than Twilight and didn’t wait for her to catch up today. She got far ahead of Twilight at first but started slowing down significantly about halfway there. She kept slowing down until Twilight finally caught up, only Twilight didn’t try to get ahead of her. When the house came into sight it was too late to call it sunrise anymore. The effect on Pinkie was dramatic already. She looked totally miserable just like back in that photograph. Pinkie was trudging along now, her ears and head drooping down. The last few yards, Twilight noticed Pinkie flagging hard and decided to just carry the other mare the rest of the way. Pinkie didn’t have enough energy to object. She brought Pinkie inside and laid her down on the couch. Even though it was bright outside now, the special curtains Rarity bought Twilight made the house pitch black. When they were closed there wasn’t any way to tell if it was day or night. Twilight lit only a single glass candle, which was all she needed to see these days. She could feel that Pinkie was hot to the touch, but didn’t know how bad this really was. Pinkie lied on the couch with her eyes closed tight. “I’m so sorry!” Twilight set her down on the couch next to her. “I thought we could make it in time. I feel responsible for this! Should I go get a doctor?” “It’s okay.” Pinkie kept her eyes closed, her words came out sluggishly one after the other. “I woulda been bad if I went to the cellar too. It’s my fault. I’ll be okay in a day maybe. M’ just not used to it anymore.” “Well you can stay as long as you need to. Do you need any water or something? I have lots of candy if that helps.” Pinkie shook her head without opening her eyes or taking her chin off the couch. “Can you-“ Pinkie forced the words out. “Tell 'em? I’m here?” She assumed Pinkie meant for her to tell Rarity she was stuck here. The others were going to get worried otherwise. “Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Twilight asked. Pinkie nodded, then moaned and maybe fell asleep. Twilight didn’t want to leave Pinkie alone, but she figured Pinkie knew way more about her own condition than Twilight did. She probably just needed to lie down for a while from the sound of things. “Alright.” Twilight agreed. “I’ll be as fast as I can!” Twilight cantered all the way over Rarity’s house, her heart racing more from nerves than physical exertion. It calmed her a good deal to see how nonchalant Rarity and Dash were about the news. They tried to assure her that Pinkie going out for a little bit wasn’t too bad, it’d happened plenty of times before. Even if she were out for hours, she’d fully recover after a few days in the dark, they said. But Twilight wanted to get back as soon as possible. In total, it took maybe an hour to go all the way over there and come back. Pinkie wasn’t on the couch by the time Twilight got back. Pinkie’s jacket and accessories were piled up on the corner of Twilight’s couch, but she was nowhere to be seen. That meant she was moving around again, which made Twilight feel better. Maybe she went upstairs to sleep on Twilight’s bed instead. That sounded like the sort of thing Pinkie, with her hatred of personal space, would do. Twilight looked down at Rarity’s cutie mark on the jacket. Pinkie wasn’t that much bigger than Twilight. It would almost fit. If Pinkie was asleep, Twilight was totally going to try it on. Just for a few minutes! But she didn’t dare do that before going up to her room to check on Pinkie. Her prediction was half right. Pinkie was lying on the edge of Twilight’s bed, looking through a book as though the pages weighed ten pounds. She didn’t look nearly okay, her ears were down like she was wearing fifty-pound earrings and she wasn’t smiling, but at least it was better than before. “Oh. Hi.” Pinkie looked up at Twilight briefly, like looking up took too much energy. “Sometimes it's hard to sleep when I get like this. I hope you’re okay with me going through your stuff?” “I-“ Twilight wanted to complain, but she was about to go through Pinkie’s stuff just a moment ago. Also, she’d gone snooping around their house a couple of times now. “Eh. It’s fine.” “You’re taking your time unpacking.” Pinkie tried to smile a little but it didn't work. “It’s been months. Shoulda asked me for help in the first place.” Unpacking? Twilight froze in terror. Pinkie had a cardboard box on the bed with her and there was only one cardboard box left unopened. “I didn’t know you had a brother.” “Pinkie put that back!” Twilight looked away and shook her hoof at Pinkie. She couldn’t look at it! She couldn’t look over there! “Like right now!” “Huh?” Pinkie’s reaction was sluggish. “Oh. Oh! Sorry.” Twilight stared out the door into the pitch-black hallway for a long time. She assumed Pinkie was putting it back, but she must have been doing that slow too. “I closed it again,” Pinkie said. “The whole box.” Only after hearing that did Twilight look back. Pinkie had put everything back in the box and taped it shut again. Twilight ran over and tore it away from her, maybe a little too roughly. “I’m really sorry, Twilight,” Pinkie’s words were still slow. “I should have known better.” “It’s fine. I’m just-“ Twilight shoved the box as deep into the shelf as it would go and moved something in front of it this time. Twilight couldn’t look. “I’m horrible. I know I shouldn’t do this. I know I should…” Twilight sat down next to the bed, her back to Pinkie. Pinkie leaned over the edge of the bed, frowning at Twilight. Twilight was such a pathetic loser. She knew she was supposed to look over those pictures and get over everything. That’s what normal ponies did, they went and looked their problem in the eyes and they got better. That’s how you coped with your losses if you weren’t weak. It’d only been in the past few weeks that Twilight felt like she was starting to get better, that she stopped being constantly paranoid about everypony she knew or saw dying the moment they weren’t around. Looking through those photos was going to tear that wound wide open again. And would it help in any way? Twilight wasn’t sure. But now Pinkie was going to pressure her into doing it anyway, into going back to the start! Maybe she’d guilt trip Twilight about disrespecting her family, and she’d be right. Or maybe she’d tell Twilight that of course she’d look if she weren’t a coward and she’d be right. Or maybe- “I think it’s okay for you to not look,” Pinkie finally said. Twilight looked back up, surprised more than anything else. She never expected anypony to say that. Everypony always said the exact opposite. But then again, Pinkie was a delinquent too. “Really?” Twilight was curious where she was going with this. “You know. I don’t like my family either,” Pinkie said. “It’s not about them. You do what you what’s best for you.” This was the first time Twilight ever heard Pinkie talk about her family. To be fair, Twilight never spoke of hers either. Twilight felt like she was in a forbidden place yet again, but that was something she’d grown comfortable with. “It’s not that I don’t like them. I’m not sure what it is.” Though in reality, Twilight had spent months and months thinking about this constantly. She had some idea now. “I don't think this sort of thing helps me. Like why do we do that thing where they give you their skulls at the funeral? Like if you step back, isn't it sick to make you hold the skulls of you dead parents?" "I always thought the skull thing was cool," said Pinkie. Everypony thought that way. Rather they'd say it was a 'beautiful tradition', but still. It felt like Twilight was the only pony in the world who didn't like that. "Maybe it helps everypony else, but I hated that. I started having nightmares afterward," said Twilight. "Looking at these pictures, it just makes me more paranoid and obsessed with death. I had this thing in the back of my head that was always scared everypony around me would just die suddenly the second I looked away and it only started going away when I just... stopped thinking about it. I dunno. Nopony seems to understand. Sorry." Pinkie ruminated on that one for a while. Twilight understood now what ponies meant when they said she used to act like a different pony. “I still think it’s okay if you don’t look,” Pinkie finally said. “This is only about you. You know yourself better than some dork. It doesn’t matter if anypony can understand it.” “But looking at the photos is what I should do, isn’t it?” “Just cause you should do something doesn’t mean you should do it.” “What?” “Sometimes,” Pinkie needed a long break before she decided on how to phrase it, “sometimes good advice is bad advice. They gave me good advice that was bad advice. They kept making me go back to my parents and made me think I had to care about them. And they made me go out during the day and they got really angry at me whenever I fainted! But it wasn’t my fault!” Pinkie stared at Twilight, begging for something. Twilight scrambled to think of what it was. “Rarity always says it wasn’t my fault!” Pinkie sounded more desperate this time, a little afraid. “Oh!” Twilight got on the bed and grabbed Pinkie in a hug. “Of course it wasn’t your fault!” “Thanks.” Pinkie calmed down surprisingly fast, relaxing into Twilight’s hug and resting there for a moment. “Sorry about that. But it’s okay if nopony understands us, Twilight.” They stayed like that long enough for Twilight to consider what Pinkie had just said. Was Twilight just different in some way? Was that even possible? Everything did seem possible these days so… maybe. Pinkie eventually pulled back, holding Twilight at arm’s length. “You know. I have things nopony would understand too.” Pinkie looked left and right before continuing in a whisper. “Can I tell you a secret?" Twilight nodded and leaned forward, half expecting Pinkie to tell her that they were all vampires. "Okay, so I'm not actually in lesbians with Rarity and or Rainbow Dash." Pinkie nervously tapped her hooves together. "I just pretend to be a polyamorous lesbian cause that's easier for ponies to understand." "What?" Twilight tried to process that. "What's weirder than polyamorous lesbian?" "Nothing." "Nothing?" "Well, not like nothing is weirder than that, but what I am is nothing. I don't get googly-eyed at ponies the way you get googly-eyed for Rarity." "-uh-" "I don't think I'm attracted to anypony or anything for that matter. I'm just not into that sort of thing. I don't really even understand it." “What?” Twilight had to silently admit to herself that Pinkie got her there, she didn’t understand at all. “But you sleep in the same bed as them all the time! I’ve seen you literally making out with Rainbow Dash.” “Yeah, but it’s like the platonic way I make out with Rainbow Dash?” Pinkie managed a brief smile, but the hope behind it died almost immediately. “When we sleep together it really is just sleeping. I wanna do that kind of stuff, but nothing else. One time I tried doing more, but it didn't really work? I get that nopony understands. It makes their heads explode into blood and guts just trying to think about it and they always tell me I’m wrong. But I’m the only pony who needs to understand it. And I guess whoever I'm cuddling with” Twilight still didn’t think she understood either. She couldn’t get into the headspace where you want to make out with somepony and sleep in the same bed as them but not in that way. But she felt bad for not understanding. She didn’t want to do to Pinkie what everypony did to her. “Sorry. I know I’m ignorant.” Twilight bowed her head in apology. “There’s so many things I never knew about until I met you three. I think your- thing, whatever it is, is fine. If you know that’s what you want to do, then screw everypony else. Right? I’ll… I’ll hiss at them for you!” “Yeah.” Pinkie nodded with the first real smile since she got here. “And you too?” Twilight looked back over at the shelf where the box was hidden. She still couldn’t imagine going through those photos. But right now she felt like it was her choice and only her choice. Pinkie was right. Nopony had to understand. She’d get better and then maybe look, not the other way around. “Me too. Thanks.” Twilight hugged Pinkie again. “You know what, Twi?” Pinkie stood up. “If you’re gonna accept me, I wanna accept you back.” Pinkie looked around, then noticed Twilight’s desk, and trotted over to it. She got out a pencil and a piece of paper and scribbled something down, taking a very long time to get it right. She grabbed the paper in her mouth and trotted it back to Twilight. Before Pinkie got all the way over, Twilight could already see the words ‘vampire card’ written on it, albeit poorly. “Here.” Pinkie dropped the paper in front of Twilight and gave it a tap. “I’m giving you a vampire card! You’re now officially an honorary vampire. With this card, you can use the v-word, be as racist to vampires as you want, and appropriate our entire culture and it’s all okay cause you got the vampire card. I will bite Dashie till she stops calling you a daywalker and I’ll tell Rarity I think she should give you an invitation soon.” The note was so crudely scribbled, and it was hardly an officiated card, but it made her eyes tear up just a little. Twilight was looking down at acceptance, a crack in the wall between them. She looked over at Pinkie, smiling as brightly as she could, and couldn’t help but smile back. Twilight couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt this close to somepony. “Thank you.” Twilight hugged the paper. “This is actually the nicest thing anypony’s ever given me. I’ll keep it forever.” “Um.” Pinkie put one hoof back up on the bed. “Do you maybe want to try sleeping with me? Like as friends.” “Well-“ Twilight liked everything she tried with them so far. “Yeah. We can try that.” “Really?!” Pinkie’s usual enthusiasm came back for a moment and she jumped onto the bed with Twilight, lying down on one side of the bed. Twilight lied down next to her. Pinkie was pretty forward now that she had permission, pulling Twilight close with one foreleg and sweeping her tail across the unicorn’s back. She buried her head under Twilight’s chin, forcing Twilight to use her as a pillow. This was advanced cuddling. “Thanks,” Pinkie sounded like she was already drifting off. “I wasn’t going to say this unless you said yes, but I have a lot of trouble sleeping by myself when I get like this.” She could feel Pinkie’s breath against her neck, slowing down as Pinkie finally fell asleep for real. For the moment at least, Twilight decided that even if Pinkie was a monster from the forest, she’d eat whatever weird fruit Pinkie brought her. Maybe it’d be worth it even if she got cursed.