//------------------------------// // Vodka // Story: The Great and Powerful Trixie // by TheCrazyAsian //------------------------------// The Great and Powerful Trixie Chapter Six: Vodka By: TheCrazyAsian A.K.A. Feasttalon Ramen is simple enough to cook. I just go to the hot water machine I have, push a button, and wait for about five minutes. The thing I love about this ramen is that it has actual beef in it. I'm not joking there are real chunks of beef in it, I think it's freeze-dried beef or something like that, don't ask me I'm not a chef or anything like that. All I know is that I put hot water in and ramen with beef comes out. While I wait for that to finish stewing I might as well get that vodka. I open the cupboard to my left and pull out a bottle of Grey Goose, about half the bottle is left. I put the bottle down on the table and look for some shot glasses. Where are those damn shot glasses, they should be in the cabinet next to the booze but I can't find them. Oh well, I'll just use regular glasses and try and eyeball the amount. I grab a glass out of the washing machine and put it on the table next to the bottle of booze. Time for the first shot. I take the bottle and tilt it forwards, vodka begins to pour out of it. When I feel I have the same amount as about one shot I stop, then I take the cup and knock it back. Nothing like the taste of alcohol in the morning. I then pick up the bottle to pour myself another shot. At this point the show must have ended because Trixie in walking into the kitchen. After she walks in the first thing she notices is the bottle of vodka in my left hand. She asks "What's that?" "Do you guys have alcohol in your world?" I respond. She seems to mull over what I've just said and just stares at the bottle in my hand, still halfway between being on the table and pouring another shot. "Yes I think we do have alcohol, but we only have it in the form of hard apple cider and salt. What you have in your hand is obviously not apple cider or salt. So pray tell, what is it?" she replies. She speaking in a rather condescending tone for someone who doesn't even know what vodka is. "It's vodka. Basically apple cider, but stronger," I say, trying to tell her what I mean in the simplest way I can. She seems to brighten up when I say the word 'stronger'. A smile appears on her lips. I assume that she wants some of it. "No way! You are not getting any alcohol from me! No way, no how," I say. Her smile turns back into a frown, she's obviously displeased when I tell her that I won't give her any. I half expect her to try and beat me up again. "I, The Great and Powerful Trixie, demand that you give me some of your va-, vu-, vodka," she replies. Great, now she's back saying 'Great and Powerful'. It's like she's regressed back to her previous phase. "I don't care how 'Great and Powerful' you are, you're not getting any!" I exclaim. I try not to make fun of the Great and Powerful part, I don't need a repeat of the incident when she first came here. She seems to mull it over in her mind for a second, I hope that she just gives up. But of course she doesn't, and it seems she think the best course of action is to tackle me. She charges forwards, and before I can move out of the way, she pushes me down on the ground. I just lay there, with the wind knocked out of me. This is just like in the beginning, maybe she has regressed to a previous phase. I praise myself, expecting her to start beating me up again. But instead, she proceeds to take the bottle, which miraculously has not shattered and killed me, and puts it into her mouth. I'm never using that vodka again. She proceeds to tilt her head back and chug a rather large amount of what's left in the bottle, I'm not sure if she intended to or not. She then, for lack of a better word, spits the bottle out of her mouth. And as if to add insult to injury she spits it out, all over my face. "Hayseed! This tastes horrible, why didn't you tell me!" she yells. If you're going to steal my liquor at least enjoy it. After finishing the sentence she smacks me across the face, as if she were some girl that just found out I was cheating on her. I finally regain enough of my breath to the point where I'm comfortable speaking, and I reply "Hey, I told you not to drink it," in an 'I told you so' sort of tone. She looks at me, looking angrier than before. I crawl out from under her and stand back up. "Why don't I get you something to eat. Is that okay with you?" I ask. "Yes, Trixie is rather hungry," she answers. At least she's not saying 'Great and Powerful' anymore. Based on what she said before about apple cider I feel it's safe to say that she'll eat an apple, and luckily for me I have a few in the fridge. "Trixie, I got a few apples, is that okay with you?" I ask. She looks at me like she's bored, then again today has been pretty interesting so everything else should seem boring. "Yes, apples will be fine," she responds. Okay, things are going smoothly now, thank god for that. I open the fridge and take two apples out of a bag on the top shelf. After I get the apples Iwalk over to the sink and wash them. Trixie just sits on the ground in the middle of the room and watches me wash the apples. After I finish the first one I throw it over my should and say "Hey Trixie, catch." I couldn't see what happened but I do hear the sound of an apple being bitten into, so I think it's safe to say the she caught it. The whole time that I'm washing the second apple I hear her biting, chewing, and swallowing bits of the first apple. If I didn't know any better I would have thought that she was Ryuk from Death Note. Then again unicorns exist so why not gods of death. Maybe a death note would drop out of the sky onto my front lawn soon. I finish washing the second apple and wipe it on my shirt to dry it. After drying the apple I turn around and toss the apple to Trixie, she seems to have finished the first one, core and all. "You know, these apples are delicious, much better than the ones I get in Canterlot!" she exclaims. Canterlot, it's probably some sort of town or city, possibly an apple orchard. And it sounds just like Camelot from in that legend about King Arthur. At this point I remember my ramen noodles and rush to the table with a pair of chopsticks. At this point I then proceed to shove the delicious noodles down my throat as fast as I can. While doing so I release a very loud series of slurp noises. By the time Trixie's done with her apple I'm tearing up slightly and my mouth feels like it's on fire. You can see why these are my favorite. Trixie trots up from her previous spot on the ground towards my seat at the table. She sees me basically crying over my noodles and asks "Are you okay? You seem like you're crying about your food. Is it that bad?" It is then that I notice how much I'm crying, as I had been concentrating on my noodles the whole time. "No, I'm fine. It's just really spicy," I reply. "Can I try" she asks. I was about to say yes but then I remembered that it was spicy beef ramen. And I'm pretty sure horses don't eat meat, so I should probably try and keep her from eating it. "No, I don't think you'll like it, trust me, remember the vodka?" I reply. I hope that she learned something from the vodka incident. She seems to think about it for a few second then she opens her mouth. "Whatever, it probably isn't that good anyway," she comments, though she seems somewhat angry about it. She sits there waiting for me to finish, after about a minute she pipes up and asks "Can I get some water?" I stand up from my seat and walk to the dishwasher, pick out a random glass, and fill it with water. After getting the water I walk back to my seat and put the glass on the ground in front of Trixie. She uses the same approach as she did with the bottle and uses her face. She bites the cup with her front teeth and tilts it back, and proceeds to get most of the water in her mouth, with a small amount trickling down the sides of her face. Thank god I used a plastic cup instead of a glass one. She leans forwards and relinquishes her grip on it, dropping it on the ground. She then says "I am going to watch some more, what did you call it, T.V." Before I can respond she's turned around and is walking out of the room. It's not like I could really tell her to stay, it's not like I'm one of her parents. When she exits the room it's not unlike any random Saturday, me by myself, eating some ramen. But then I'm reminded that its isn't just me here anymore there's somebody, or maybe it'd be more appropriate to say somepony, else. End Chapter Six