//------------------------------// // Lost in Thoughts, All for Naught, Pony Caught // Story: Woven Right, Courage Bright, Love in Sight // by OhYouFoal //------------------------------// To say that what was before Fluttershy was a trial would be an understatement. After weeks of thinking, days of pondering, minutes of questioning and seconds of deciding how to finally make an advance on something that had been sort of ‘haunting’ her, the timid pegasus had finally forced herself in to action. This belief that she had failed to speak up and pursue something was no longer possible to ignore. There was one pony that she knew she could trust, one intelligent but also considerate and polite enough to work with her and handle her problems at a pace which she could manage to reciprocate. As she made her way to the Ponyville Library, Fluttershy had been feeling like she was at the top of the world. Prepared to conquer the issue with a ‘Let’s get it over with’ attitude, there was the feeling that nothing could stop her. And then she ‘actually’ arrived at her destination, overwhelmed with a heavy cloud of concern. The door before her felt more a giant wall that burst from the ground, promptly after some witch or draconiquis had stolen her wings away. With that image in her mind, the yellow pegasus pony had easily been standing in front of this door far longer than she intended to. Her intense fear of opening up was keeping her from pushing through the wooden gateway standing between her and the one pony she felt she was comfortable talking with... At least since the other she felt capable of confiding in had gone away. Her thoughts drifted away from that fearful image to a memory that brought her heart a deal of despair and fright, but of a different kind. ~~~~~~ “So, after this year’s Winter Wrap Up, I’m afraid I’ll be leaving to take residence up in Canterlot. Needless to say, I’ve sort of struck gold with this deal girls. I... I can’t turn it down. You all know that I care about each and every one of you but we’ll still meet every year during the holidays and probably the gala as well. But the things this position could do for me, it’s just...” The Element of Generosity looked up to most her friends after a sort of guilty tucking of her head to find them all smiling. ”I’m gonna throw the BEST going away party EVER for you Rarity!” Naturally Pinkie’s mind jumping immediately to ‘her’ first concern, as the others lightly sighed at her usual naive way of thinking, Applejack and Twilight quick to contribute reassurance to their friend. ”It wouldn’t be fair of us to make you stay here just because we’re your friends and we’d miss you. Distance isn’t a concern after all, we’re connected and as long as we keep in touch, it’ll be like we’re not really apart”, the bookworm quickly assembling the best piece of comforting commentary she could compose. ”Twilight’s right, we ain’t about to hold you down, this is yer big chance to really make yer mark in Canterlot like ya always wanted. Why, ifin Braeburn was lookin’ fer mah help to get a new orchard started up out west, you’d bet yer flank Ah’d be out there faster than Dash to a Wonderbolts tryout.” “Yeah right, like ‘I’ would be ‘rushing’ to a tryout.” Rainbow was quick with her rebuttal, a delighted grin on her face. ”You know I’d be the first in line before enough ponies even showed up to MAKE a line.” Remembering there was an actual discussion going on, she turned back to Rarity to add her two bits into the discussion. ”It’s not like it even matters, if I wanna see ya badly enough, I’ll just bolt right on over to Canterlot, it’s only a hop, skip and a BOOM away from Cloudsdale after all”, she said, stomping her hoof at the boom sound that was made by the cyan pony, implying a Sonic Rainboom was all that really separated her from hanging out with the more fussier of the mane six. By the time all the others were laughing and resuming their conversations for plans for the next couple months, they had once again forgotten the presence of another pony there. However, Rarity looked across to Fluttershy who had been looking down at the floor for longer than she could remember. Unaware of the thoughts going through the pegasus’ mind, she called out her name. ”Fluttershy dear... Is everything alright? You haven’t, well, said much of anything since I told everyone about my full time contracts with Hoity Toity.” Fluttershy tapped the spoon in her cup of tea once more, putting off having to answer. Finally, she mustered up the courage for a response, but it wasn’t an honest one, ”I... Th-think it’s great! I’m really h-happy for you Rarity!” After that, she couldn’t manage to say anymore after she saw the relieved smile on the other pony’s face. With the fashionista joining in on the others banter of things they all wanted to do before she moved out of town, Fluttershy felt like sinking into the cushion she sat on in the hopes of just disappearing, overwhelmed with an indescribable sadness over her friend’s announcement. Though she wasn’t quite sure just ‘why’ she was so sad. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ That’s... That’s why I’m here, right? I need somepony else... somepony who might be able to tell me what to do. Fluttershy paused, then shook her head. No, I... I know what I want to do but, I know what I have to do. But, I don’t know where to started. She took a deep breath, trying to gather her emotions and get them under control at least long enough to regain control over her body and force it to move. Only a few seconds later though, after beginning to lift her right hoof, Fluttershy found herself lost in her thoughts once more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Will there be anything else you two need?”, the spa ponies chimed in unison to their two best customers. With a shake of the head from Rarity, they left the two alone in the sauna. Fluttershy let out a soft sigh as she settled in and got comfy, seeing that the white pony across her was staring at her with concern. ”Is... Is something wrong?” Fluttershy barely managed out, before Rarity began on a small tirade. ”Fluttershy, this is the third time we’ve had one of these spa outings of ours and you still haven’t said anything. Each time I try to talk, you don’t look at me and you seem to mumble everything. I feel like... I feel like you’re mad at me for deciding to go through with this plan.” Fluttershy’s eyes widened at the last comment. ”M-mad?! I-No! I mean, I...” Realizing she was stumbling up on her words, she shook her head and squeaked. ”I guess it just still hasn’t quite hit me yet that you’re going to be gone. Aside from Twilight, I... only really feel comfortable talking with you. Applejack’s a very understanding pony, but sometimes she doesn’t understand the problems I have. Pinkie... is Pinkie. Rainbow Dash is kind of her own person and she just likes to go to Cloudsdale with me and comes to me for advice on taking care of Tank but aside from that...” She trailed off with a slight shrug. As the timid pegasus had been talking, she’d failed to notice Rarity moving up to her side, carefully placing a hoof on her shoulder, making Fluttershy’s heart beat so hard and fast it felt like it was about to burst out of her chest. Only when the thumping sound of her own heart subsided had she realized that the other had begun speaking. ”Fluttershy, you’ve done so much with me and for me, you know I’ll always be there for you to talk to. We’ll still be able to talk, it’s just going to take a day or two between messages; Derpy is a speedy mailmare but she’s certainly no Rainbow Dash! And you know you can come visit me any time, it is just a day’s flight from Ponyville, right? But more important is that you’ll always be invited to any of the more VIP type events here in Ponyville or anywhere nearby.” She had full eye contact with the other mare now. ”I’ll always have somepony to escort you to my shows or give you a ride to the parties I attend, there’s no-pony and I mean NO-pony I’d want besides you to be part of my entourage.” Rarity had to pause. ”At the least, you’ll always be my number one. After all, I don’t know what kind of new ponies I’ll meet in Canterlot or through my work, it’s only a matter of time before I make some more new friends but...” Rarity began off into one her usual tirades while Fluttershy closed her eyes and gently snuggled against the other, sighing in a sort of relief. She did matter to Rarity and at that moment, she felt a brief sense of comfort in that thought. ~~~~~~~~~~ But that’s gone now. She’s gone... My friend is gone... My- She stopped at that thought and paused once more, unsure of the next words that would float through her mind. That’s why... That’s why I’m here. I need to know. The pegasus nodded and gave her best ‘prideful’ stance... Only for her confidence to be shot as she realized that Twilight had opened the door. ”T...Twilight? How long have you been standing there?” Twilight smiled lightly, almost with a tinge of guilt as she realized that her friend was now shivering, her bright yellow coat seeming to pale from the sheer intense startling sensation brought upon by the unicorn. ”Oh, just about five minutes, no biggie though, I didn’t want to bother you since you seemed pretty deep in thought.” The lavender pony stepped to the side. ”Want to come in? We can talk more inside, seeing as well... You don’t look comfortable talking about this even to yourself, let alone out in public.” Fluttershy nodded idly and slowly made her way into the library, Twilight quietly closing the door as to not startle the already well shaken up pegasus. With a quiet whisper to Spike, Twilight got him out of the house. Fluttershy breathing a sigh of relief, believing that they were truly alone, or so she hoped. As books began to float off the floor and the tables back to their resting places on the shelves, Fluttershy squeaked in protest as she tried her hardest to dodge the flying books. Twilight lost herself in the obsession over neatness and order in the household, failing to take into account the other pony with her. Not too much later, they sat down to a cleared off table, the Element of Magic ready to divulge some handy friendship mending advice to the clearly distraught pony. Or at least, that was what Twilight Sparkle had been HOPING would happen. Another couple minutes went by, which the studious pony had spent writing down some notes, knowing it was best to let the shyer pony come to speak in her own time. ”Twilight... Have you ever... Thought about another pony a lot?” Setting down her quill and parchment the moment the other spoke up, she was quick to respond. ”Mmmhmm, I think about other ponies all the time! Like if I talked to them today or if we had plans or something like that, except for Spike of course since he’s here all the ti-”. Fluttershy shook her head quite promptly. ”No, not like that, I mean...” She slowly drew imaginary circles on the table with her right hoof, sighing for what seemed to be the 50th time that day. ”I mean, have you thought about one pony in particular... Like so much, that it seems that’s all you think about.” Twilight raised her brow in curiosity to the other. ”Welllllll... Aside from maybe the foes we’ve dealt with in the past, I did think about Trixie for a few days after she left. But that was more of a simple, ‘Hmmm, I wonder what she’ll do now’ or ‘I hope she didn’t get herself or other ponies into trouble again’ kind of thought.” Fluttershy found herself slightly interested in that comment, but decided to go back to her earlier statement. ”It’s... sorta like that but... This pony, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them. I wonder if they’re alright or if they’re having fun or if they miss anypony from where they used to live or... Or...” Once again, the student chimed in. ”Or if they miss you?” Both locked in straight eye contact now, Fluttershy was doing her best to keep her composure. ”Yes. This pony, I wonder if she misses me as much as I miss her.” Twilight blinked at Fluttershy in amazement, finally feeling it click in her head the moment that simple little pronoun was spoken. ”You miss Rarity, don’t you Fluttershy?” With the nail hit on the head, Fluttershy lost her security in being vague about the pony in question. This unfortunately enough led to MORE silence as the two stared off into space, before the pegasus returned to reality. “I don’t know why Twilight, it just seems like the moment I get some peace and quiet to myself, that’s where my thoughts go. I’m concerned about things that never used to worry me, I mean, it’s not like I’m worried about Opal or anything... I worry about Rarity as much as, if not more than I do about Angel getting enough dinner before bed or getting enough rest after play time or-” Twilight raised a hoof. ”It’s alright, you don’t need to explain any further.” Momentarily confused by the other, Fluttershy watched Twilight magically pulled one book from its resting place off the shelf to set it down in front of herself, flipping through the pages before her face lit up with an “Aha!” look. She promptly commanded the book over to Fluttershy, inviting the other pony to read. A quill floated from its resting place on the table, lightly tapping a portion of text, which Fluttershy read aloud. “Infatuation - The state of being infatuated and/or having overwhelming or foolish passion and interest, see also... C-C-C-CRUSH?!” Fluttershy’s mouth seemed to hang open as if a hinge in her jaw flat out snapped into a million pieces. ”You think I have a crush on Rarity?! That! That... that.” As her panic subsided, a brief hint of sanity attempted to understand the implication and she finally had a moment of clarity. ”I guess that could make sense.” Twilight grinned with delight, always pleased with her ability to swiftly and easily procure the answer to her friends problems, MOST of the time. ”You have an interest in Rarity you can’t explain and since she’s not here, you can’t spend time with her to sort of, how do I say this... Get over your interest?” It took a moment for her to process it, but Fluttershy was quick to agree. ”I think you’re right Twilight. Since she’s not here anymore, I can’t make heads or tails of whether this is just me missing her or if... well, I...” “If you’re ‘longing’ for her?” Twilight couldn’t help but casually tease her friend, the others were right when they spoke of the Element of Kindness and her blushing, it was ‘too’ adorable. After one more attempt at gathering her mess of a self esteem, Fluttershy’s thoughts pondered onto her concerns with Twilight herself, knowing the other’s eagerness to send her an analysis on practically ‘everything’. ”Twilight, you CAN promise that you’ll keep this between us, right? I mean, I understand that this ‘probably’ is best suited for a friendship report but, I don’t know how I think about it yet and I don’t know if the Princess would be able to help me either.” However, Twilight’s demeanor changed to one of shock, then discomfort, as if she’d just come down with something. ”...Twilight? Why do you look so nervous? Is something wrong? Are you sick? Did you just remember something really impor-” Finally she noticed the other presence in the room, turning slowly to find the last pony in Equestria she wanted to talk to right now. ”I assure you my little pony, I can give you the exact kind of help you need.” The Alicorn’s words lost purpose though, as Fluttershy only heard the word ‘I’ before fainting and hitting the floor with a firm thud, out cold from pure shock. ” I guess that probably wasn’t the best way to let her know I was here, was it?” It was at least an hour before the pegasus came to and a few seconds more before she realized where she was, who was there with her and why she was there. In that moment all the thoughts of the conversation before came rushing back, thought at least she managed to refrain from passing out again, limiting her embarrassment to a deep blush. ”G-g-g-g-g-good-d-d-d-d afternoon Princess.” Celestia presented a bright smile down to the mare and, Fluttershy’s whole body shaking in irrational fear as Twilight sat her up before moving to the other side of the table with the princess ”Forgive me for terrifying you Fluttershy, I forget sometimes that I have a bad habit of surprising and sneaking up on other ponies. I came here today to check into a certain issue involving you.” It didn’t take long for Fluttershy to figure out what it was. ”It’s been at least 4 if not 5 months since I last received a Friendship Report from you, but the rest of your friends send at least one every week, oddly enough. It’s almost as if it’s on schedule, as if some divine force seems to allow various events to fall into our laps and let us learn something every 7 days.” Celestia seemed to ponder that for a bit, causing Fluttershy and even Twilight to stare in a perplexed manner before Twilight prodded the Princess in the side with her hoof, bringing the Alicorn back to reality.” Ahem. That aside, it concerned me that I haven’t read anything from you in ages.” She sat down at the table with Twilight before prompting Fluttershy to join them. ”And based on what my faithful student here has told me, it seems that there is definitely something on your mind, something very relevant to the issues of friendship and caring for one another. So, if you don’t mind me asking, I’d like to hear what it is that’s been ‘on your mind’ for the past couple weeks.” Twilight lifted a piece of parchment and a quill by the will of her magic, smiling with glee. ”And Twilight will kindly remember that she is not the one giving me a report, won’t she?” Twilight’s expression immediately shifted into one of embarrassment, stashing her writing tools away with a wistful sigh, as Fluttershy brought the Princess up to speed... All 5 months of it.