Canterlot, Fall of 4 BAT: The Night Court of Equestria was well underway. A solemn affair it was, led by a detached but benevolent Princess Luna, Sovereign of Stars, Mistress of the Moon, Lady of the Night, Younger of the Diarchy, etc., etc., who really was getting rather bored with the whole thing. She maintained an attentive facade for the blathering politician- blast, what was his name? Oh yes— Baron Green Light, who was currently outlining the fifth point of eight in his new tax cut for a certain bracket of the populace. A bracket into which, Luna was quite sure, he only just happened to comfortably fit. Yet, though she registered the words, her mind was concerned with quite a different and considerably more vital affair. To be absolutely precise, it was concerned with using her magic to quietly slip food off of the cheeseboard and over to her beloved pet opossum, Tibbers.
Her ears pricked up suddenly. Out in the corridor, there echoed a faint bumping and crashing, as though an intruder were attempting to escape the guard. That would be interesting, Luna thought. Perhaps she would finally have an excuse to use the baseball bat she kept stowed under her throne for use in emergencies. She hadn’t wielded it in battle since… well. Since before she had become a princess.
She left that particular train of thought as the noises grew louder. Hooves skittered along the hall. The ears of many bored courtiers perked up, desperate for any sort of distraction. Luna’s gaze fell on the door. The excited scuffling grew louder and louder. The door flew open, and Princess Celestia, Her Serene Majesty, High Solar, Elder of the Diarchy, etc.etc. danced in, her mane flying and her regalia disheveled. “Sister!” she cried, eyes shining with excitement. “They’re back! The Doctor has returned!”
Luna stood stock still, jaw dropped wide. Then she broke into a wide grin. “HUZZAH!” she roared, deafening those closest to her.
The assembled courtiers that evening had the rare privilege of seeing their rulers do a happy dance, all the while squealing like schoolfillies. Catching herself, Luna attempted to regain some degree of composure. “Night Court is suspended on this eve, due to a national emergency which our sister and ourself must investigate personally,” she declared. “Until our return, please take up any business you may have with either Kibitz or Raven.”
“Um, pardon me, your highness,” murmured a royal guard at Luna’s side, “but the guards have received no report of anything like a national emergency. On what grounds are you so sure that anything of such magnitude will occur?”
The princess merely shrugged. “We’re going to Ponyville. It really is only a matter of time.”
Then, giggling freely, she vanished into thin air, followed by her elder sister.
“Point Six,” Green Light droned, “The economy will be vitalized synchronously through the harmonic resonance of concentrated money…”
***
The princesses strolled down Ponyville’s main boulevard. They received a few stares, but most of these came from out-of-towners who weren’t yet used to Ponyville’s unusual relationship with reality. “I wonder what they’ll be like this time,” Celestia said. “I don’t know if I told you, but I met a new incarnation while you were… away.”
“Yes,” Luna agreed dryly. “While I was in a centuries-long time-out. As I have told you a thousand times, sister, I have forgiven you as you have forgiven me!” She sighed. “Which number, then?”
Celestia frowned. “They were oddly evasive about that. I think they were the ninth, but there was a strong possibility it was… later on.”
Luna snorted. “Still ever the enigma?”
“Yes, I suppose so. Less the cold chessmaster than was ours, though. They seemed rather tired, really. Said something about a war. And…”
“And?”
“How Gallifrey fell.”
Luna was silent. “By ‘fell’, you mean…”
“Gone. Vanished. Dead.”
“...Poor Doctor.”
“Mm. They were in a bad way when they first got here, not long after the Grand Galloping Gala fiasco.”
“Hah! Now We wish even more that We had witnessed that rare event!”
Celestia nodded, but her smile dropped. “Yes… they seemed lost. If I’d let them continue on in such a way, they would have driven themself mad.”
Luna glanced over, interest piqued. “And?”
The merest hint of a smirk graced Celestia’s elegant features. “Well… I gave them a companion.”
“Oh, go on, don’t keep me in suspense.”
Celestia’s smirk bloomed into a full lunatic grin. “None other than our dear nephew, Blueblood.”
Luna’s eyes bulged. “That pompous brat? We have heard many a tale of his misadventures, aye, and many a mare scorned as well! Did he not shun honest Applejack? Did he not crush graceful Rarity?”
She seemed ready to go into a full-blown rant, but Celestia cut her off. “Exactly why I chose him. He needed a firm hoof. The Doctor needed someone both to care for and to argue with. It was a perfect match, and Blueblood has turned out better than even I had expected.”
“...Celly. I think you scare me slightly.”
The elder alicorn stuck out her tongue, smiling. “As well I should, Lulu.”
***
The duo eventually arrived at a cottage. Luna looked at her sister doubtfully. “Are you certain that this is the right address? It seems rather… small.”
Celestia hesitated. At that moment, however, the door flew open, and a grinning dun stallion came bouncing out. “Celly! Lulu! Brilliant to see you again!”
“Hello, Professor,” Celestia smiled.
Luna said nothing, choosing instead to throw herself at the Doctor, wrapping the Time Lord in a tight hug. “Cru— cru— crush— ing—” the Doctor gasped.
“Oops,”
Breathing deeply, the Doctor managed a smile. “Won’t you come in? Have some coffee?”
“That sounds lovely, old friend,” Celestia said.
And the two most powerful beings in the world walked into the little cottage. They left their crowns and regalia at the door, for they were here not as princesses, not as rulers, but as friends. And a pair of goddesses sat down with the Doctor and his family for teatime.
***
Ditzy was not easily nonplussed. Living in Ponyville, one had to more or less accept the occasional oddity. Things like rains of frogs, rampaging monsters, and suspension of the laws of physics were par for the course, and even Discord, ancient spirit of chaos and disharmony, destroyer of harmony, ender of worlds, had been relegated to the role of a harmless old prankster. But this was different. This was Royalty. In her home. Which, she realized, with a sick plummeting in her stomach, she hadn’t even cleaned since the last time the Crusaders had visited.
“Ditzy?”
She snapped out of her reverie. Everyone was looking at her with expectation. “Would you pass the sugar?” Celestia repeated.
“Oh! Um, yes, of course, your highness.” She grasped at the sugar bowl, upsetting the cream. Fumbling, she dropped the sugar bowl into the strawberry jam. Her face was as red and burning as a sunset. Hesitantly, she picked up the remains of the spilled sweetener. “One lump or two?” she squeaked.
Celestia merely smiled. “Five, at least, please. Here, let me help tidy—”
“Oh, no! I couldn’t possibly ask you to do that!”
But a warm, golden aura was already levitating the settings back to their proper place. Luna leaned over. “Thou may relax, Miss Doo. We are here as your guests, not as your princesses. As the moderns say, ‘Chill’.”
“It’s Dr. Doo,” Ditzy corrected automatically, before she realized what she was saying. She gasped and stuffed a hoof in her mouth.
“Apologies.” Luna smiled kindly at the pegasus before straightening back up in her seat. “It really has been too long, Doctor.”
“Well. I suppose it has been, yes,” he agreed through a mouth full of jammy dodger. “When was it from your perspective? Cos’, last I remember seeing you was that business with the— no, hang about, that’s not happened yet.”
“It was, I believe, not long before the fall of the Crystal Empire— immediately before, that is,” Luna mused. “Yes, you and that masked unicorn— you wouldn’t tell me her name—”
“No, sorry, that’s not happened yet from my perspective.” He took another jammy dodger. “Best to avoid that sort of foreknowledge, I’m afraid.”
“Mm,” Luna acquiesced with a nod. “I remember you used to tell us that all the time when we travelled with you.”
“Oh yes,” Celestia laughed. “‘Don’t wander off, girls.’ ‘Don’t cause a paradox, Luna.’ ‘Celestia, I know exactly what is going on, but I can’t tell you, so be a dear and blow up that planet.’”
The Doctor had the good grace to blush. “I was a different pony in those days,” he protested, half joking.
“When DID you travel with the princesses, Doctor?” Dinky asked.
“Wwweeellll…” The Doctor puffed up, rubbing a hoof against his cheek, “they weren’t princesses just yet. Not exactly. They were still quite young… and they lived in a very different world…”
Celestia looked at him. “Oh go on and tell the story,” she said, smiling. “We all know that you want to.”
The Doctor grinned. “Well, if you insist…”