You find yourself pacing a little at home, worrying you said too much to AJ or the wrong thing. That's what it feels like you're always doing now, is worrying. Why did you tell AJ she needed to think about what she wanted to do with Anon? There's hardly any point until he learns to communicate what he wants. Then you vigorously shake that thought out of your head.
"No, it's important," you tell yourself.
"Yeah," Spike nods, clearly not keeping with the conversation.
Lately, the little dragon has become a source of venting concerns and ideas. More than usual. You know he tunes out a lot of it, content to snack away, but you need to hear some thoughts aloud to really help you gain a perspective on them.
"Even if Anon can't tell us, it's important to think about it. Just in case," you rant.
Then you pause mid-step. No, what you're really confused about, is why you told her Anon was lonely. It's obviously true. Of course he is lonely.
"The only one of his kind trapped in a world completely alien to him. So why point it out?"
"Point what out?" Spike asks mid-chew.
"That Anon is lonely."
"Well, I think every pony knows that. That's why everyone tries to help him out, like with the birthday party Pinkie is going to throw for him."
"Yes, I know that. I'm just wondering why I went around stating the obvious."
"Twi', you've been stressing a lot over this. It's not healthy."
His words give you pause and you take a seat. He's right. He's right, and you know it, and yet you still let the paranoia fly off the handle. Here you are, just minutes later, over-analysing every bit of the conversation you just had.
"Besides, how can you really stop him feeling lonely? It's not like we can just get another human, or send him back wherever the other humans are."
"You're right. I know. I just... I don't know."
"You mean you're right."
"What?"
"I just repeated something you were saying earlier."
"Heh, I've been talking in circles haven't I?"
The little dragon stops stuffing his face, wipes his little claws off on his thighs, and gives you a hug.
"I'm worried about you Twilight."
"Thanks, Spike," you half-heartedly reply as you return the hug before sending him to bed.
Part of you wants to admit you're worried about yourself. The other part thinks it's best not to do any more worrying than you have been. Especially after you wander into the bathroom and look at yourself. Your mane has some stray ends poking up here and there, your face appears pale yet flush, and some dark shadows have formed under your eyes from sleep deprivation. While a couple rings of saggy flesh isn't uncommon from staying up late reading a good book, you've never developed dark shadows.
"What is going on with you?" You ask your reflection as if it had an answer.
You splash your face with water before retiring for the night.
You've decided to take a bit of a self-care day. Last night you kind of realised it's well overdue. You sleep in, have a big breakfast, give Spike the day off, and get wrapped up in the latest Daring Do. A content sigh escapes your lips and you roll over on the floor.
"Twilight, darling?" Rarity calls from downstairs.
You hastily descend the stairs, eager to see your friend. While you were planning to spend the day locked indoors alone, after half the day passed, you find yourself more willing to have company.
"Oh dear. You do look absolutely dreadful," she tisks as she looks over your mane.
"I know. I've been a... Little under the weather lately."
"A little is a bit of an understatement don't you think? What you need," Rarity beams in a sing-song tune as you can already guess where she is going, "is a spa day."
"Called it," you think to yourself.
"I won't hear a single word against it. I bet it's all that lesson planning for Anonymous. It's very valiant to try and look out for him so much but you need to do a bit of self-care too."
You suppress the urge to decline or resist this. In a way, it's a bit of punishment for letting the stress pile up like this and in a way, it'll be kind of nice to be pampered.
The spa is relaxing as always. The cucumbers over the eyes, the facials, the mud soaking, and the rest of it. You find yourself so relaxed in the sauna that you nearly nod off for a bit. Once your head drops, you jolt yourself awake.
"Ooo, that's no good. Come on, let's hop out if you're feeling sleepy."
"You sure?"
"Of course. It'd be a real risk to your beauty if you slept in all that steam," Rarity says as she shoves you out without any resistance.
The two of you head over to the massage tables, where you lay down just as the spa ponies zip over.
"How are you feeling?" asks Rarity.
"Much better. Thank you for all this."
"Nonsense, you needed it... But, how are you doing? I mean more than just in the now?"
"I just let the stress pile up on me. You know how I get sometimes," you dismissively try to shrug her off.
But you know Rarity well. Just as well as she knows you. Plus she has always been a pretty good read of a mare.
"What's been going on?"
Her tone is sincere. And that's when you notice it's just the two of you in the room. Rarity must have signalled them away a moment ago. You sit up and look at her in the eyes.
You take a very long, very deep, and very need breath before speaking, "You ever have a day where everything seems to stress you out more than it should, you get paranoid and second guess everything, and you feel isolated because of it?"
"Do I ever? That's every time I get a bulk order, especially around the Grand Galloping Gala."
"That has been my past couple of months," you reply dejectedly.
"But why?"
"It's all this Anon stuff. And I don't mean teaching him. He's a pretty good student most of the time, he really tries no matter what I throw at him."
"Then what about him?"
"Just... I'm the only one who... Seems to worry about him."
Rarity sternly frowns at you.
"You know that's not true. We all do. He needs company, and the Apples have given that in spades."
"I don't mean in that sense. I... Don't you worry what goes on in that head of his? Or what if he's dangerous?"
This time Rarity's frown burrows so much, her eyes almost disappear. But you can still see the anger behind her eyes.
"Of course I do. Aside from the Apples, he spends more time with that little group than anyone else. They are always dragging him along to things, and they follow him into the Everfree sometimes. I've forbidden Sweetiebelle from going but I bet that she still sneaks away, you know how carried away they get."
Hearing Rarity's words do calm you down a bit. It's nice knowing you're not the only one who worries about this sort of thing.
"But we need to trust him, just a little."
"Yeah, I know."
"I know you know, and that's why I'm not going to lecture you Twilight. I'm just going to ask you calm down a little more."
"I'm trying," you shrug, "I just wish I had the answers."
"Well, he is quite the mystery," Rarity cheerily chirps back.
"You know what bothers me most of all about Anonymous," you ask as you recall how often the thing that bothers you most seems to change so often.
"Twi," warns Rarity, "You're here to relax."
"Right."
In a defeated slump, you fall back onto the massage table to stare at the floor.
"Go on, what is it."
"He seems very accepting. Of his place. Don't you think there'd be a bit of culture shock and depression that'd go along with his situation."
"That is odd, I'll admit. But he could be thinking that already and we just don't know it."
"I guess."
"There's a lot of possible explanations, like maybe, he's had time to go through all that and we don't know. We can't be sure until he learns to speak to us."
Then the idea hits you.
"Where did Applebloom say she met him?"
"Where? Well, it was the Everfree, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, but when?"
Rarity ponders your question for a moment but is unable to answer. And neither are you, because as far as you're aware, Applebloom never did give much of an explanation on her and Anon's encounters. Let alone their first. You thank Rarity for the spa day, de-robe, and eagerly head off to find Applebloom.