Another day has passed, and yet Twilight woke up this morning and informed me that Princess Luna hasn’t discovered where my powers are. This was, admittedly, disappointing.
Twilight’s consolation in the form of a snuggle, however, was certainly not disappointing.
I even indulged in her desire to have me read a book along with her. It was less unbearable than expected.
Thankfully, something interesting starts happening just as I am about to become weary of all of this inaction.
“Well, isn't that something!” I declare at the sight of the city on the horizon. “Canterlot was one thing, but this place… Some of those buildings are enormous!”
“That is one of many of Manehattan’s claims to fame,” replies Twilight. “A lot of ponies live here, obviously. The deeper we go, the more crowded the streets will be. Oh my, look, Celestia’s carriage just had to pull aside to let some wild cart pass. My goodness, but that fellow is impatient! I wonder how he would react if he knew who he was running off the road! That was outrageous! Although, I suppose things like this are all to common around here...”
“It is rather comparable to a balloon, I do declare.”
“A balloon?”
“Too much air in one spot and the balloon go boom.”
“Oh, I see. That's true. Manehattan's concentrated population is analogous to a high pressure environment. If the environment doesn't expand to accommodate everything, then heat increases.”
“Um, sure? I like my version better.”
Twilight let's out a quiet laugh. “Of course you would.”
“I remember this place from before though,” I continue, going back to my original point. “There didn't used to be anything here. And then, suddenly, WOOSH! Biggest city I've ever seen. I didn't even know that ponies could build towers that large, considering you lack the sheer magical power to hold it all together, but I won't pretend that I understand how you do the things that you do. I mean, clearly it works. Probably more pony magic if I had to guess.”
“Actually,” responds Twilight. “It's all possible thanks to advances in engineering and technology rather than magic.”
“Ah. Not something that would hold much interest for me then.”
“Discord, at this very moment we are sitting on a technological construct partially of your own design.”
“That's machinery though. Not engineering.”
“It is engineering though!” Twilight insists. “Engineering is the design phase!”
“Well, I couldn't have built this thing by myself. And I didn't plan anything on paper beforehoof, I just did it.”
“I suppose so,” Twilight concedes slowly.
We are flying closer to the city when suddenly Celestia’s troop turns away from the main road.
“They're not going any further into the city yet?” I ask in surprise. “We haven't even gone past a single giant tower yet!”
“They are called skyscrapers. But it would appear that the Princess’s current destination is somewhere close by.”
We both watch for a bit before the carriage train reaches it's destination.
“What is that place?” I ask eagerly.
“I don't know, but judging from the shape of the building coupled with the fact that this is close to the time of day that Celestia seems to always have lunch, it seems probable that it is an eatery of some sort. They must have reserved the place in advance. We'll have to go lower to see exactly what this place is and what they are up to.”
“Well, if they are staying inside that place, we'll have to do more than that if we want to get close to Celly. As much as I would like the idea of simply smashing through the wall, ponies might get injured.” Twilight gives me a funny look at this. “And while sudden and unexpected and dramatic entrances are hilarious, terrorizing everyone isn't really that much fun. Plus all the property damage which I currently have no method of repairing. Come on, I would never actually DO it. My point is, we're going to have to land entirely and get out. Although, I'm not sure I'll be able to tell the difference between our blimp and the real Celestia if I don't have a point of reference…”
Twilight let's out a laugh. I raise my eyebrow at her. “Did you just laugh at a joke about Celestia's weight?” I ask.
“What? No!” answers Twilight in a startled tone. “I was just- look, it's not that the joke is actually funny, it's just that you just keep on saying it and saying it even though she is clearly not overweight. It's almost foalish.”
“So you're not laughing at Celestia, you're laughing at me?” I ask. And then I grin. "Works for me! Remind me later to show you my comedy act.”
“Oh good grief, the chaotic draconequus has a comedy act. I can't even imagine how that might go. I expect it must be really something.”
“Well, I like to think so.”
We are indeed at a restaurant, apparently,” she noted, pointing out a large sign as we descend through the air.
“ ‘Merrio’s’ “ I read aloud. “What kind of restaurant is this?”
“It looks like an Itailian place.”
“Hmm,” I muse aloud. “Is it normal for these places to have bouncers?”
Twilight looked and saw that there is a unicorn mare and an earth pony stallion standing in front of the front door to the establishment. Next to them is a large poster that looks like it was created and hung in haste. It reads, 'We are reserved for the whole day for a private party'. As we watch, a line of palace guards gather at door.
“They must be there to ensure that nopony else aside from Celestia and the royal guard enter in order to maintain the privacy that the Princess wanted,” Twilight says. “Speaking of the Princess, where is she?”
“The one at the very front of the line,” I declare. “She made herself look like one of her own pegasus guards, but that one is Celestia for sure. I can feel her magic. She can certainly pull off an effective disguise when necessary. No doubt she is using it to remain inconspicuous when she's out in the open like this. Do you think she's going to eat like that too, or do you think the employees of the place know just who it is that they're serving today?”
“I don't know, but I just realized that we have a problem. You can probably slip inside with no problem, but I don't think it will be as easy for me.”
“I suppose a teleportation would attract way too much attention. Are there any other entrances into this place?” I wonder.
“Possibly. Let's check the back.”
After a short flight over the building, I manage to spot a likely door and we begin to land.
Suddenly, as we are descending I become aware of a bit of passive magic at the edge of my senses, and something about it feels off.
It grows stronger as we touch the ground.
“Discord?” says Twilight after a moment of waiting. “Are you going to deactivate the machine now or...?”
“Oh, duh,” I mutter, and I turn the appropriate switch. “I was just distracted by some sort of magic.”
“What sort of magic?”
“I'm not sure, but it's not the sort that I'm used to being surrounded by. It's originating from the inside of the restaurant.”
“There's strange magic in there?” asks Twilight, worried. “I hope it isn't a threat to the Princess.”
“I don't think so… If my magic sense was boosted by my powers, I would know exactly what it is and where it's coming from from across the city if I tried, but as I am, I need to get closer look.”
I jump out of the snow blowing machine and jog over to the door. I stop in order to focus on my magic sense and immediately stare at the wall in complete surprise.
“Discord?” Says Twilight in concern after catching up to me. “What's wrong? You look dumbfounded, and that alone tells me that something is wrong. Is it dangerous?”
“Well, it depends on your definition of dangerous… But if you are asking whether it's going to hurt the Princess then the answer is almost certainly 'no’. You see, I am pretty sure that Pinkie Pie is in there.”
“What? Pinkie Pie?” cries Twilight in bafflement. “That's highly improbable! Why would she be here in Manehattan?”
“Perhaps she came to look for you?” I suggest.
Twilight gasps. “Maybe something serious has happened in Ponyville and I wasn't there to stop it and she came to find me! But, wait, she was already in the restaurant before we arrived. She might be here looking for the Princess instead and she discovered her schedule somehow. Or perhaps she IS looking for me and her Pinkie Sense told her that I would be here before even we knew we would be here. Or maybe she is here for some totally random and unrelated reason. With Pinkie Pie, it's difficult to know.”
Well, just so you know, I can tell where her general location is, and she isn't in the front of the restaurant. She's back here, in the 'employees only’ section.” I tap a claw on a sign on the door that declared the area behind it as such.
“Why would she-”, Twilight began, but then cut herself off. “She must be here to find me for some reason. It's the only explanation that makes sense.”
“Which is why I sincerely hope that there is another explanation. Also, don't you think that Pinkie would be thrown out of the kitchens? She tends to make a mess when she is left around ingredients.”
Twilight scrunches up her muzzle in concentration. “That's true. Even if Pinkie is here with Celestia's permission, it would still be suspicious for her to be in the back with the chefs. She doesn't work here. I don't know, maybe she convinced them to let her help?”
“Well, standing around and guessing won’t get us anywhere,” I say. “Let's for ourselves shall we?”
I fling the door wide open. Turns out it isn't even locked. Inside, a white pony in a chef's garb and sporting an impressive bushy black mustache walks straight past the open door without even glancing our way. I turn toward Twilight and behold a horrified expression. She motions for me to close the door.
I close it.
“I can't sneak into the kitchen!” Twilight half whispered. “I'll be caught! I know that being in close proximity to you tends to hide myself from others as well, but we know that it isn't perfect! It's too risky!”
“Oh, right. Sorry, I forget. Here, you stay put and I'll run in and see if I can figure out what's going on?”
“You'll come right back, right?” says Twilight cautiously.
“Yes, of course I will. I don't want you to miss out on anything!”
“Alright, very well. But do make sure not to cause a disturbance just yet? We need to find out why Pinkie is here before we do anything stupid.”
“Only for you.”
I open the door again and slip inside.
The other side of the room turns out to be a storage room. The mustached chef is still in here, complaining about something or other, but I have other things to be doing besides listen in, fun though it might be. I pick a direction and start exploring.
I don't have to go very far before a solution to our problem presents itself. It's almost too convenient, how easy this was. But then again, this is the storage room.
I snatch up a spare set of chef's garments and run back to the back door with them in my arms.
I stop and stare at the door handle. And I let out a sigh.
No matter how much time passes with it absent, I will never stop wishing I have my powers back.
Instead of opening the door with magic, I am forced to bring my paw up to the handle, still clutching fabric. Getting the handle to turn without letting go is tricky, but I do manage it. I then awkwardly push it open with my side and stumble outside.
“What are you carrying, Discord?” asks Twilight in confusion.
“I'm carrying a disguise for you, of course!” I announce as I unfurl the garb for her to see.
“That could work, actually” Twilight agreed. “Hopefully anypony who doesn't know who I am will believe that I'm a new employee and won't question it. It's not a perfect solution, but I really do need to find Pinkie. I just wish she had turned up some place more convenient. Oh well. I better get these on.”
This process takes literally one second, as Twilight simply teleports the clothes onto herself.
“That reminds me,” I say, and then I walk over to our ride. I quickly locate my trusty swirly colored towel and wrap it around my middle, tying it up like a belt.
“You never know,” I say to Twilight as I come dashing back. “By the way, that chef is still behind the door rambling to himself,” I tell her. “He might not wander off for a while.”
“I’ll just stay calm and walk by casually. If I look busy, he'll probably leave me be.”
She turned toward the door and hesitated.
“You’re a bad influence on me, you know?” she says. “I can’t believe I am sneaking into an Itailian restaurant when I could probably just go to the front door and have Celestia vouch for me, even though she would be surprised to see me. Well… here it goes…”
She cracks the door open and steps inside.
“Oh, a-thank tha stars!” cries a voice, which turns out to be the chef. He rushes up to Twilight in an instant.
“It’s-a disaster!” he continues frantically in a heavy accent. “Half of your-a co-workers are ill and cannot work! You’re-a late, but at least…” He trails off and studies Twilight’s face briefly. And then he shakes his head, apparently not caring that he can’t remember Twilight’s face. “You are-a here, at least, and that’s-a all that matters!”
Twilight is taken aback and clearly nervous, but she says, “Half of the chefs are ill?”
“Yes!” cries the chef. “It’s-a terrible! And on the most important day in-a my career! At least my-a finest chef is not also ill! I just hope that she's fine enough to save us from this disaster in-a the making! She a-needs somepony to assist her with the pasta dishes! The rigatoni and the mostaccioli and the ravioli! Come, already the orders are-a coming!”
Without further words, the chef drags Twilight away and into a kitchen.
The very place where I know Pinkie Pie to be.
“Stinky!” he cries, much to my confusion. I hurry into the kitchen myself and I see Pinkie Pie also dressed up in chef’s garb and currently kneading some dough, I think.
“Yes, Mister Merrio?” Pinkie says, not turning away from her task.
“This-a mare is here to assist you, Stinky.”
“Oh, good!” she answers.
“I-a must go!” he cries, and swiftly leaves the kitchen, leaving us alone with Pinkie Pie. And something is very, very wrong with her. I focus my senses further, hoping to locate what appears to be missing.
“Hi!” says Pinkie, giving Twilight a wave. “Just give me a minute!”
“Pinkie!” cries Twilight in surprise.
This causes Pinkie to cease her kneading instantly and look towards Twilight.
“Um… My name is Stin-“
And then she freezes in place.
“How did you…” she whispers, before abruptly collapsing on the ground.
“Oh my goodness!” cries Twilight as she rushes to the other mare’s side. “She fainted! Why did she faint!”
“Because I am pretty sure that this is not your Pinkie Pie,” I say cautiously.
“What is that supposed to mean?!”
“Well, you see, my dear, the Pinkie Pie that you and I know has a bond of friendship with every single pony in your entire town. This Pinkie Pie doesn’t have a single one.
Twilight stares at me in disbelief for a few seconds before turning to face the unconscious mare.
“So,” I continue. “Well, not to jump to conclusions here but Pinkie might have undergone the most severe midlife crisis I have ever seen.”
“There’s no chance that Pinkie would just give up every single friend that she has like that!”
“Well, what do you think is going on then?”
“Do you think that she came from another universe? What if she is some sort of parallel version of Pinkie Pie?”
I blink in surprise. “That seems like a far-fetched idea. Not exactly the sort of thing I expect out of you. Where did that come from?”
“It’s not completely far-fetched. I’ve recently become engrossed in the study of cutie marks. It’s startling how little about them we actually know. It’s all theory for the moment, but I think I can feel something big if I can just discover the right connections. Anyway, in a way a cutie mark is a symbol of who a pony is. But a cutie mark doesn’t so much tell what one’s special talent, but rather show how that pony has chosen to harness their special talent. This is why there are ponies today who have marks depicting things that were invented relatively recently, even though they could not possibly have gotten such a mark if they lived in the past. It is also possible, although rare, for two ponies to get what appear to be identical marks, but their magical signatures will always differ even in those cases. Not even identical twins have identical magic signatures, because their fundamental magic is tied to their spirits, and even twins are not the same individual.”
“Well, yes,” I agree. “That’s what I am saying. The mare in front of you is Pinkie Pie. I’m fairly sure of that. But where did the whole ‘other universe’ thing come from?”
Twilight seems hesitant for a bit. But she finally answers. “Well, it’s just that alternative realities are a popular theory among theoretical magicians and I asked Princess Celestia if she had any idea about whether it’s all true or not and… She sort of mentioned that Starswirl the Bearded managed to make contact with another universe, a long, long time ago."
This surprised me far more than I allow to show. “You mean another dimension, surely? There is a big difference between another dimension and another universe. I’m pretty sure that there are no other copies of ourselves in other dimensions. I would have noticed. Probably. I suppose anything is possible."
“Wait, you can access other dimensions?”
“Well, yes, but they are all strange and alien to ponies like you. Not places that you would expect ponies to come from, certainly. But I can’t access places that are in a totally separate universe. So, I’ll admit, for all I know, there are other versions of ponies in other dimensions. I’m just having a little trouble believing that somepony actually found a way through the barrier between dimensions. I still think this theory of yours is a stretch.”
“Well, yeah, you’re right, that theory probably isn’t correct. Especially since I have thought about it and I have an explanation that makes much more sense. I think she is a magical copy of the real Pinkie Pie!”
I shake my head. “No, I don’t see how that could be. Whenever I animate something, there are two options: I either have to control it myself, or else give it a set of instructions that it will follow autonomously. While it is possible to fabricate something that looks like a pony with something that looks like a cutie mark, the result would be a lifeless automaton. One made out of the same stuff as ponies, but it would be a hollow shell never-the-less . This mare has Pinkie Pie’s magic and cutie mark, which, theoretically, is fundamentally tied to one’s spirit. And if this Pinkie Pie is a separate Pinkie altogether, then this is like nothing I have ever seen before in my whole long life. It would mean that there are two copies of the same pony running around that are fundamentally the same pony, only with a different set of experiences and memories, since memories are stored in your head and not in your spirit.”
“Is that even possible?” wonders Twilight aloud. “Can the spirit of a pony actually inhabit two individuals at once?”
“Theoretically, I don’t see why not…” I muse. “The spirit of a pony is bound by physics even less so than magic. Almost not at all, in fact. Ergo, a spirit does not physically have a location. It must be bound to ponies somehow, obviously, but it might be possible to bind it to multiple, across any distance. Or even across universes, I guess. The distance wouldn't matter. In fact, it would likely have to be the case if parallel universes do exist, as multiple instances of ponies who are the same individual would have the same spirit. And you and Celestia seem to be quite convinced. I’m going to have to ask her about that sooner or later, it is far too big for me to just ignore.”
Twilight lowers her head. “Then that complicates things very greatly,” she says. “A month or two ago, Pinkie Pie managed to find a strange magic that allowed her to create copies of herself. I had decided that they must have been magically constructed automatons because of their single-minded focus on having fun. Admittedly, sometimes the real Pinkie Pie acts like that too, so I was having a lot of trouble figuring out who the real Pinkie Pie was. But it got worse. The copies started causing property damage and severe disturbances. I had no choice but to send them back into the magic that spawned them. But, of course, I needed to make sure that the real Pinkie didn’t get sent back by accident.”
“Wait,” I interrupt. “As a normal pony who is not a magical construct, would the real Pinkie have even been able to be ‘sent back’?”
“I don’t think so, but I wasn’t about to take that kind of a risk. It also turns out that they shared Pinkie Pie’s knowledge, although, I later realized that they didn’t share her memories. It would have been simple to identify the real Pinkie by simply asking a question about our past with her. The copies wouldn’t be able to answer correctly. It doesn’t matter now. Anyway, one more thing that I noticed though was that each copy seemed to have the real Pinkie’s magic, and they were also each their own source of it. Which meant that I couldn’t even differentiate them that way either!
“But they never did stop acting like fun machines. Even when we gathered them all up for a test of friendship, never once did a single one of them even try to ask me to not send them back. Instead, they all goofed off right until the moment I sent them back, exactly what I would expect from an automaton. The only Pinkie Pie that understood what was at stake was the real one. Or so I thought. I suddenly have this heavy suspicion that one of the copies looked around and realized that it didn’t want to go back. And decided to run off.”
“You think it became a true, free thinking Pinkie Pie…” I mutter, now overwhelmed with interest. “If all of this is true-“
Suddenly Pinkie lets out a moan.
"Well, I guess you're about to find out!" I say.
Seconds later, she opens up her eyes and stares at Twilight. And then her face fills with dread.
“Pinkie,” says Twlight quickly and seriously. “When is the last time that you saw me before today?”
I realize that is is one of those questions that only the real Pinkie would answer in a certain way. Pinkie hesitates for about ten seconds.
“It was the day that you sent the others back,” she whispers.
“I Pinkie Promise, says Twilight, still speaking quickly, “that I am not going to send you back. Not now, and not ever. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my ey-argh! Why do I always forget to close my- Argh!”
“… Oh…”
“Are you okay?”
The Pinkie Pie who is a copy of the real Pinkie lets out an enormous huff, and then stands up.
“Today was the day,” she says. Both Twilight and I stay silent, listening. “Today was the day I would fix everything. Princess Celestia herself is here. Here, at the place where I took work! I was going to fix up the yummiest dish ever, and then when the Princess is in a good mood I was going to reveal myself and ask to talk to her. And then I was going tell her everything and try my hardest to convince her… That I am Pinkie Pie. Every time somepony makes a Pinkie Promise, like you just did… Somehow, I know. The moment it happens, I get this tingle. Because Pinkie is who I am. And I was hoping against hope that she would understand and make sure that you understand too, as well as everypony else.”
“I see,” says Twilight uneasily.
“I don’t need to do that anymore, though, do I?” Pinkie says.
“I could still introduce you to the Princess,” says Twilight.
“Whoa, wait,” I cry out. “What about staying out of her sight?”
Twilight glances at me wordlessly, but it only takes one look into her expression to realize that this is a greater priority.
“No!” says Pinkie quickly, and she shivers. “I was only going to do all of that because had no other choice! Now… I don’t have to do it, and so I don’t want to!”
“You don’t want to keep hiding forever do you?” Twilight asks in confusion.
“No, but I just don’t want to right now! What if she doesn’t approve of me? What if… the other me doesn’t like me?”
“That’s not something that they would do,” answers Twilight with confidence. “That will never happen.”
“I… I know. But I’m still too scared. One day, maybe I’ll have the courage but for now... Will you please, please promise to keep me a secret?”
“Well, if you’re sure…” says Twilight. “I promise.”
“Thank you. So… what now?”
At this time, a waiter comes rushing into the room with a notebook held in his magical grasp and starts sticking them to a weird metal thing hanging from the ceiling that I just realized must be intended to hold orders for the chefs.
“This one is the Princess's order!” he shouts, pointing at a specific paper. “You must ensure that it is perfect! Please waste no time!”
He rushes right out again.
“Great galloping gators!” squeals Pinkie. “I almost forgot all about that! I have to cook for the party!”
“What party?” says Twilight in bewilderment. "I saw something about that outside, but I thought it might just be a ruse..."
“Mister Merrio said that the Princess arranged for a birthday party for one of her private guards! I guess he must really like Itailian food, but I'm still going to make a cake too! It’s traditional! I know I said I don’t want to talk to the Princess anymore, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to walk away from giving her what she ordered! By the way, are you actually here to help? Because I could really, really use it! Can you cook?”
“Well, sort of,” says Twilight uncertainly. “If you have a cookbook with very precise instructions then I can definitely follow that to the letter.”
“Good enough!”
“Discord, you’re going to help me!” says Twilight as she comes to my side.
“Hang on!” I cry out, feeling suddenly overwhelmed. “I had this vision of us spiking their food, or switching who is sitting next to who without warning, and other fun stuff like that! Now you want me to help you make Celestia and her goons the best lunch ever?”
“Yes!”
“But what about what we came here to do?”
“That will just have to wait. You’ve shown me what you do already! Now I need to do what I do, and what I am doing is helping a pony who needs help! And I’m asking for you to help me to do that!”
“But,” I stammer. “I don’t know how to cook! I always just summon up fully complete dishes! I have no idea what to do, and if you think I can follow a cookbook, you’re very much mistaken!”
“You can be my gopher then! And you should be able to manage assisting the waiters, too, if you can refrain from messing with Celestia.” Twilight suddenly rushes back to Pinkie.
“Let’s divide the orders between us!” Twilight says to her. “What’s the first thing on my list?”
“Um,” says Pinkie, looking over at the papers. “Somepony ordered spaghetti. I don’t understand why that keeps happening, that’s not even on the menu!”
“Well, do you have spaghetti?”
“Well, yes, although Mister Merrio doesn’t like it. He says its uncultered or something. But it’s in the storage room.”
Twilight comes rushing back to me.
“Discord! Please go fer spaghetti! I’ll get everything else ready!”
Okay, well, this is really happening then. And she did ask nicely.
And besides, I just had an idea.
I reach down to the towel and undo the knot, and then I wrap it around my middle again, but in a different way so that it doesn’t bunch up and instead hangs down toward my legs.
“Server Discord is ready!” I declare. "Don't mind all the stains that might suggest that I have several coats of strange and colorful foods clinging to my waist, it's just paint!"
“That’s great!” says Twilight. “But we’re kind of in a rush!”
“Oh, sorry, forgot!”
I dash out of the kitchen.
This is going to be a long day, I think to myself.