//------------------------------// // Bullies and Butt-heads // Story: Weapon of Math Destruction // by Ultimate Punch //------------------------------// The accursed day had finally arrived… Cheerilee stood in front of Ponyville Elementary School, her gaze shifting left and right as she warily eyed the other prospective students. Fillies trotted past her while making idle chatter and colts chased one another in a friendly game of tag, all eagerly heading towards the learning center to start their first year in a completely new environment. But despite the excitement and bustle around her, Cheerilee was not cheerful about any of it at all. Several years of home schooling and an early exposure to bullying documentaries on the news channel had made the filly loathe the idea of ever learning in such an unfamiliar—and possibly dangerous—establishment. And yet here she was, forced by her mother and father to enroll at the place she wanted so badly to avoid. Gone were the days when she could watch television or take a nap as she pleased. No, now her world would consist of shabby, old textbooks, bossy teachers and snot-nosed kids. Not to mention the tyranny of the bullies in the jungle gyms. Salutations, new world! she thought resentfully as she took in the sight of her school. It seemed like a humble looking place, but Cheerilee knew better. It was all just a ruse to attract unsuspecting parents into enrolling their soon-to-be victimized children. The wooden building gave off a modest and friendly aura, but behind those sturdy planks were unspeakable acts of horror, like wedgies and nuggies. The sandbox in the playground would be fun to play in, if it was not filled with buried illegal items, such as water guns, gum, and deplorable beauty supply magazines. And then there was the swing set. Oh how much fun it would be to ride on those jolly red swings, paint-coated by the blood of the bullies’ victims. But the creepiest part of the school was the birds. Those winged harpies flew around the premises, incessantly chirping in their shrill voices while staring down at the students with their rapidly turning heads and their shifty eyes. With all of the noise they made, it almost sounded as if… they were trying to warn her of something. Yes, now that she thought about it, it was obvious that they were desperately trying to caution her of the unseen dangers lurking behind those dark windows! She could almost hear them now as they cried, ‘Run! Run child, and don’t ever look back! Terrible things happen within those walls. It is too late for the others, save yourself!’ Cheerilee felt a bead of sweat run down the side of her head as she stared wide-eyed at the nightmare. All of these foals were walking into their dooms, and they would not even realize it until it was too late. And she was to suffer the same fate. Despite voicing her fears back at home, her parents had adamantly ordered her to get over her hysterics and march into the school to enjoy her new life. Disobeying their orders would spell an even worse fate for Cheerilee; one that lacked snacks, television and other necessities the filly required to get through the day. Well, at least she would be able to tell them ‘I told you so’ in the afterlife. She gulped down her fears and decided it was time to step into her doom. She had a good run. Those few years flew by so quickly that she never really got to appreciate the small things in life, but she had no regrets. Well, at least her last meal was satisfactory. Her mother had gotten up especially early and prepared waffles in the shape of a house for her... or perhaps it was the shape of the school. How fitting, she thought bitterly. Even her breakfast had foreshadowed her resting place. But that was enough dilly-dallying. With a solemn look, the condemned filly took her last step as a free pony and her first step into prison. Then the worst possible thing happened. As she slowly took a hesitant step, another student came galloping at full speed past her and tripped over her outstretched hoof. The poor filly sailed through the air in slow-motion, allowing her a chance to look at Cheerilee during her flight. They made brief eye-contact before the filly fell into a roll on the dirt road, only stopping when she bumped into a tree. Cheerilee went into panic mode. Not even one step into the school and she had already made an enemy. She saw the look the filly had given her when she flew by; there was pure bloodlust and undying rage in those eyes, she was sure of it. In a documentary she had seen, there were several cases in which bullying started out with a simple misunderstanding. This was a prime example of how those came to be, but Cheerilee would not let her school days be ruled by some punk getting her tail in a knot over something so trivial. The documentary had also stated that in order to stop bullying, you had to stand up for yourself, and the best time to do it was before the problems escalated. With that thought in mind, she analyzed the potential threat. By the looks of it, she was a unicorn about the same age and height as her. She had a minty coat that matched her multi-hued mane of teal and white, and her flank had some sort of stringed instrument on it. It was common knowledge that unicorns never truly unlocked their full magical potential until their prime years, so basically the pony in front of her was just a weak unicorn with a specialization in music. I can take her, thought Cheerilee. She thinks she could bully me, but I’m not going to let her, decided the earth pony as she resolutely stepped forward. A small crowd had formed around the unicorn, but only a few of the students were bold enough to step forth and help the filly up. Cheerilee smiled at this. The more students around to witness that she would not accept bullying, the better her chances of living a peaceful school life were. The crowd of young ponies fearfully stepped aside and made room for her as she stomped towards the would-be bully with righteous fury blazing in her eyes. The unicorn was brushing the dust off her hooves, but looked up when she felt a shadow loom over her. Upon seeing the familiar face of the pony she had bumped into, she stretched out a hoof and gave a clumsy smile. “Hey, sorry about bumping into you back there,” she said through her wide grin. Cheerilee scowled at the missing front tooth of the filly. She must have just lost a baby tooth… or maybe it was knocked out during a fight! This filly was a lot tougher than she looked. Cheerilee would have to be more cautious when dealing with her. “My name’s Lyra, and I guess we’ll be schoolmates from now on. What’s your name?” Cheerilee narrowed her eyes as she swatted away the unicorn’s hoof and took a big step forward, causing Lyra to step back in surprise. “You want to know my name?” The unicorn nodded slowly as she shrunk under Cheerilee’s glare. “Why? So you could write it on my tombstone after you’ve bullied me to death?” “W-what? No, so we can be frie—” “Oh, I get it. You’re going to look up my address and mess with my family too, aren’t you?!” Cheerilee smiled as the unicorn scrambled backwards until her haunches were against the tree she had crashed into earlier. The look of panic in her eyes, the way she moved her mouth with no words coming out, and just the fact that a bully would cower beneath her brought an odd sense of glee to the rose earth filly. But before she could practice her justice any further, the school bell rang, signaling all students to hurry their little flanks into the classroom for attendance. “Hmph, saved by the bell, huh?” sneered Cheerilee. “Stay out of my way next time, or feel my wrath.” Satisfied that she had avoided being bullied, and perhaps even countered it, Cheerilee turned away from the unicorn and stepped into a relaxed trot towards the classroom. She noticed that the other children were making room for her and were also avoiding eye-contact as she made her way past them and smiled. It seemed that she had successfully gotten her message across. That’s right, I don’t take bullying from nopony, she thought victoriously. With her newfound confidence and respect, perhaps school was not going to be as bad as she suspected. Lyra sat in bewilderment under the shade of the tree she had bumped into earlier, her mind abuzz with questions as to what had triggered the hostility of the crazed earth filly. However many times the unicorn replayed the scene in her mind, she couldn’t figure out why her classmate had acted so ornery. Perhaps something she said or the way she smelled; did she offend? The now self-conscious unicorn lowered her head until her snout was hovering just above her pits, and then she took a large whiff, confirming that she still smelled as fresh as the daisy soap she had used during her bath in the morning. If it wasn’t a bad odor that had repulsed the earth filly into acting like a jerk, maybe her personality was just sucky. It was the only explanation she could think of for why the filly had acted so… butt-faced. Yes, butt-faced was the perfect way—nay—the only way of describing the aggressive mannerisms of this filly. Then it hit her, harder than she hit the tree. This butt-faced filly must be a bully! Lyra began sweating at the realization, but not out of fear. No, the curious unicorn had never met a bully before, and so she was getting excited at the chance to meet such an oddity. As far as she knew, Ponyville was the safest and probably the happiest place in all of Equestria; a place where everypony befriended each other and hung out to cause all sorts of shenanigans while drinking cider! Or something like that. Bullies were as rare as dragons in these parts, perhaps even rarer. She had to take this opportunity to be friends with the bully, or she may never get another chance. With that thought in mind, Lyra got up off her haunches and eyed the trail of frightened colts and fillies littering the path the bully had taken to get to class. That was a bully alright, but she was also a potential friend. The unicorn bounced up off the ground and began chasing after her target with mad glee shining in her eyes. Other students stared at her like she was crazy, and maybe she was, but she paid them no heed. With a filly like that as her classmate, she could tell that this school year was going to be eventful.