I sat at my desk, the pencil in my grip gently brushing over the paper, shading in the hair of the character I was drawing. Once I had completed that, I glanced at the whole for a moment, checking to see if I had managed to copy the general likeness of a favorite character from my favorite manga, Wings.
I growled when I saw that I had drawn her in such a way that resembled Rarity. I prepared to trash the sheet but stopped, instead taking up the eraser I had sitting to the side and instead removed a few lines. With a few strokes, I was looking at my love, rendered in my own drawing style, though I don't think I captured her eyes just right.
I sniffed, feeling a wave of tears mustering to march forth as they had most of the afternoon when I wasn't wearing the mask for my friends, playing the new and stronger Fluttershy, the one that didn't cry at the slightest provocation and wasn't afraid of silly things.
Like being forgotten.
"Why?" I whispered to the drawing. I had stayed up to talk with Rarity on the phone like she had said earlier, but it was later than she had ever called before. "Why didn't you call?"
I laid my head on my desk, staring at the graphite-rendered form before me, tears leaking free. Two sides of myself starting warring with each other, the rational side acknowledging that she had a demanding course load compared to mine, and that we both had more than we had expected in the first few weeks of classes. The emotional side, however, argued that a phone call wasn't that hard and that she had to know how muh I had been looking forward to spend in time with her this weekend.
The two sides sniped at each other, neither side gaining any ground until there was a soft knock at my door.
Wiping away the tears quickly, I called to the door. "It's open, Mom," I said, expecting to see my mothers slight form enter.
Instead, Rarity stepped in, her hair not quite the model of perfection that she kept it in for being seen in public, but I recognized it's fashionable unkempt look. Her muse had been ignoring her again. She was lookin down at her feet, hands clasped and twisting slightly.
"May I come in?" She asked quietly.
I stood slightly. "Rarity?" I asked softly. "What are you doing here? It's after eleven."
"I know," she said, hands betraying her nervousness where her face wouldn't. "But what I need to say couldn't be said over the phone. It had to be done in front of you."
Fear sprang fully into my heart, making me cower slightly as the curtain of hair slid downto shield me from her gaze. "Oh," I whispered. "I understand."
I heard the bed squeak slightly as she sat down. "No," she whispered. "I don't expect you do, darling. I have been terribly unfair to you these last few weeks. I can never make up for the time lost there, but I can try to be better. I've rearranged my schedule to free up the weekend again."
"How gracious," I bit off, unable to help myself, though I did feel bad when I saw her wince at my tone.
"I suppose I deserve that," Rarity sighed. "Fluttershy, I know that you probably think the worst of me right now, and heaven knows I've like to earned it, but would it hurt to at least look at me?" The weakness in her tone was sad to hear, for I had never heard her sound that way before.
I raised my head, eyes locking onto hers. Tears shimmered there, and she looked for a moment like a young girl I had once seen daily in the mirror before I he retreated behind the mask of timidity. I wanted to cradle her in my arms, but something boiled up from below the surface, and I felt my face grow hot.
"A month," I whispered.
She blinked, opening her mouth to speak, but I cut her off.
"You've been canceling plans for a month, and you think that just because you drove down in the middle of the night I'd forget the hurt you've caused?" I spun my chair around and stood, pointing my finger at her. "That you'd be able to just wipe out the anger and the nights I cried myself to sleep over it? You're wrong, Rarity!"
I seethed, trying to get ahold of my emotions, but they were determined to roam for the moment. "At least twice we could have stayed in at your place, but you kept claiming that you'd be a bad host," I glared at her, the look breaking into a sorrowful stare. "You don't have to be a host for me, Rarity Belle. You just have to be there. That's all I need."
I collapsed back into my chair, slumping against the back as I hid my gaze again. After a few moments I heard he bed squeak again and felt slim fingers slide under my chin to tilt my head up.
"I can't promise I'll always be there," Rarity whispered. "Mentally, at least. But don't you ever think I won't be there for you if you need me, Fluttershy. Come Monday, I'm going to withdraw from a couple of classes. The demands on my time are just a bit much for me right now, and I need to focus on some things that are truly important to me."
"Don't do it because of me," I breathed.
"Why shouldn't I?" She returned. "You aren't the only one that's felt the strain. I've missed my Care Bear."
She leaned forward and rested her forehead on mine.
I stiffled a giggle. "Is that all you came to tell me?" I said, reaching out and hugging her.
She kisses me gently before pulling back slightly. "Not entirely," she said, reaching into her pocket to pull out a key. "I also want you to have this. It's a key to the apartment. After all, I want you to feel as much at home there as you do here. Any time, day or night, you are welcome to anything in those walls."
I took the key, gazing at the tiny bit of brass. I knew Rarity valued her privacy, especially with Sweetie Belle always violating it - dangerously so with the Anon-A-Miss incident from a few years ago. But for her to give me unlimited access...
"Thank you," I whispered, pulling her into a deep kiss.
"Hey," Zephyr's voice called out as my door opened again. "Could you keep it down? I'm..."
A thrown plush hit my brother square in the face. "Out, Zephyr!" I warned.
"Sheesh," he grumbled, leaving.
I grinned sheepishly at my girlfriend. "Sorry for exploding on you like that."
She waves a hand. "You needed to say it," she said twining her fingers wih mine. "Though I do want to ask a favor..."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Could I borrow a set of pajamas? I seem to have left in such a hurry I neglected to pack an overnight bag."
I couldn't help but laugh.