//------------------------------// // Twelve: Interlude III: Still I Grieve // Story: Rain without Rainbows // by Leoshi //------------------------------// Rain without Rainbows !Disclaimer!: The only ponies I want are the kinds I can find for sale on Ebay. You know the kinds I mean - ones I can place on my desk to watch me while I write. That means I don’t want the ponies owned by Faust, Theisson, or Hasbro. Got it? Let’s get moving. When we last left our heroines, they had held a heart-wrenching talk with Rainbow Dash about why she tried to end her life. We also learned that the stallion Alucard has been orchestrating some of the misfortune that has befallen our friends. What could he be planning? This chapter is the final interlude in the trio. In it, we will see Rainbow’s attempt to seek forgiveness from another mare who was ruined four years ago: Spitfire. But can she ever forgive Rainbow for what has happened? Thanks to spitfireart for drawing the amazing mare that I’m using as a mental image. No, I didn’t ask for use, but I’m plugging her work anyway. Besides, you can look for yourself. (Yes, it’s the version on the right.) http://th01.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2012/147/3/4/who____who_are_you_by_spittfireart-d51ak8n.png ACT II - The Pariah Chapter twelve: Interlude III: Still I Grieve Even given the short time since having been found, Rainbow Dash was making steady progress toward being healthy. A constant supply of food and drink kept her strength up, and a barest hint of weight began to show along her stomach. It was this newfound strength - or, rather, reclaimed strength - that prompted Rainbow and her best friend to make a little trip outside Ponyville. Applejack and Rainbow Dash moved slowly, not at all in a hurry to make their destination. Although, it would be more accurate to say Rainbow was in no hurry. While she was the one who mentioned it, she never intended to actually seek out Spitfire, especially after what had happened four years ago. It began earlier that morning. While she and her friends were waking up from their spots on the library floor, Rainbow Dash had mentioned the virtue of forgiveness. Mainly, how she was shocked to see her old friends accepting her so openly. There was an underlying friction with them all, like they hadn’t yet forgiven her (‘I guess Rarity was right,’ she had mused), but the fact that they welcomed her back was incredibly comforting. Their conversation eventually led back to the tragedy at the tryouts, and how furious Spitfire had been the following evening. Rainbow had lamented that she would like to at least try to apologize to her, if for nothing more than closure. But, she said, it wouldn’t matter, as she would never be able to find the stuntmare. That was when she got a surprise - Spitfire lived nearby. As it turned out, the fiery pegasus had been caring for Soarin’ even since he was permanently grounded, providing medicine and support when needed. The two of them had been offered a small home outside of Everfree, where they could visit the herbalist Zecora and acquire medicine when they ran low. Which brought them to where they now stood. Well off the beaten path, the simple house of the former daredevils was seen, growing larger as they closed the distance. The house was welcoming enough, boasting a second floor and a small balcony - which, oddly enough, had been neglected for a couple years at least. Despite the disrepair of the wooden balcony, the building as a whole was warm and inviting. Rainbow was rooted to the spot. “Easy, now,” Applejack encouraged. “Y’all said this is somethin’ ya need to do, remember?” The cyan pegasus gulped. “Yeah, but...it was easy just talking about it. This is something else.” Before long, the pair moved forward once again, finally reaching the door of the house. With a moment to glance at her friend, Applejack lifted a hoof and gently rapped on the door. There was a sound of movement from within, and in a short span of time, the door slowly opened. On the other side stood a bright-yellow mare, her red-orange mane gently sweeping over her head. When she first opened the door, her gaze had been gentle and curious. When she saw Applejack, however, a trace of hardiness tainted her gaze. “Mornin’, Spitfire,” the farm mare greeted. She offered a warm smile, one that kept the yellow pegasus from glancing over her shoulder and seeing a certain somepony cowering behind. Spitfire’s mouth turned into a curious slash as she recalled the name. “It’s Applejack, right?” “Yes, ma’am.” “I wasn’t expecting anypony today, least of all you...no offense. What brings you by?” Applejack raised an eyebrow, giving a light grin. “Let’s call it...opportunity.” She side-stepped, revealing her rainbow-maned friend to the former captain. For a moment, they merely stared at each other. It had been years since they had last met, and needless to say, their last meeting was nothing short of disastrous. Spitfire’s mind had gone numb, but as the feeling returned, an old fire was brought with it. She narrowed her eyes, turning her gaze from Rainbow Dash to her farm pony friend. She spoke calmly, wrestling for control over what was obviously anger. “What’s the meaning of this?” Rainbow tried to talk, but Applejack spoke first. “Ah reckon it’s opportunity, like Ah said.” “Cute,” she growled. “And what would I do with this opportunity?” Applejack’s grin faded, and her tone turned serious. Not condescending, but firm. “Four years ago, Ah told ya that you could be angry with Rainbow Dash all ya wanted. Ah bet there were some things that went unsaid...well, now ya can have your chance. Ah reckon the two of ya would try and figure somethin' out,” she finished with a sideways glance at Rainbow. Spitfire’s focus returned to Rainbow Dash, who instinctively averted her eyes. For a long moment, neither of them spoke - the stuntmare simply stared, fighting an inner battle with her feelings trying to decide if she should react and in what fashion. Finally, with a huff, she turned away and walked into her house. But she left the door open. A quick look inside revealed that she was standing next to the doorway, her back turned, waiting for Rainbow to enter. The invitation was not lost to the pair, though Rainbow Dash was anxious. Applejack moved close, murmuring loud enough so her recovering friend could hear. “This is somethin’ you gotta do, Dash. C’mon, now, you’re only a few steps away.” Rainbow shook her head, feeling a flight of panic. “I don’t know what I’ll do.” “Ya never once got by jus’ on thinkin’, Rainbow. You’re a pony of action, ain’t ya?” she asked, giving her a helpful nudge along the shoulder. “Don’t think, jus’ talk. It’ll come to ya.” “Yeah, but-” “No buts, ponygirl. Get in there and make things right,” Applejack urged, nudging her closer to the doorway. With that boost, Rainbow walked the final few feet, stepping into the house. When she turned her head, Applejack was standing outside, content to wait and let her friend fight her own battle. Spitfire slowly closed the door, and they were alone. Rainbow Dash immediately turned her head away, unable or unwilling to meet her steely gaze. For a long moment, they simply stood, neither speaking and neither wanting to be where they currently were. The silence grew too heavy. “I thought you were dead.” Rainbow slowly looked up, meeting the gaze of her old idol. The stare was not a welcoming one. “I wished you were dead,” Spitfire added. She stepped around the weakened pony, considering every sickly detail. “From the looks of you, it’s like you were dying. What in Equestria happened to make you...you know what, no, I don’t want to know.” “Spitfire...” Rainbow began. She didn’t know what she was going to say. “The last time I saw you,” Spitfire continued, oblivious to the mare’s murmuring, “you were escaping from a hospital when you were in desperate need of care. You flew right into a storm, an idiot move by all accounts. You even bashed me across the head and sent me crashing to the ground. That was four years ago. I’m sure you remember it as well as I do.” ‘I do,’ she thought. The anguish at learning what had befallen her dream team was something that could never be forgotten. “Now look at you. Starved to death, wings barely hanging on, your mane is more of a disaster than I remember it being...what kind of hell did you crawl through, kid?” Rainbow turned her gaze away as she considered telling her what had happened. Thinking better of it, she avoided the question. “I wanted to tell you I’m sorry.” Spitfire visibly tensed - her breath stopped short and her eyes went narrow. “What?” With a sigh, Rainbow Dash finally lifted her head. She looked Spitfire square in the eye. There was no turning back now. “I’m sorry.” As before, a heavy silence claimed them. Spitfire’s face shifted from shock to wonder, then finally settled on disgust. She was insulted. She began laughing. It wasn’t pleasant. “You...please tell me you’re not serious. You can’t honestly expect it to be that easy, can you?” she asked, a sudden sadistic glee in her eye. Her response was silence as Rainbow Dash merely looked on. “You show up out of nowhere, looking like a walking corpse, and tell me you’re sorry?” Spitfire went on. She walked to one of her windows, looking outside to the awaiting draft pony. “And I suppose your friend out there told you that you should? She told you that if you apologized, everything would be alright? Phah,” she spat, “you’re either really hopeful or just plain stupid.” “Please listen, I-” “And NOW, you want to talk? NOW you come to me, years later, expecting everything to just be fine?” She turned and unfurled her wings, letting the full force of her anger erupt on the unfortunate cyan pony. She stood in front of the window, blocking the natural light - Rainbow was thrown into shadow. “DON’T YOU KNOW WHAT YOU TOOK FROM ME?!?” “I do know!” Rainbow shouted back, desperate to be heard. “Then how dare you come here! How dare you show your face to me! How dare you say you’re sorry!” Spitfire moved forward, standing over Rainbow like a queen over her subjects. Her voice trembled. “You ruined everything, damn you! All that I had is gone because of you!” “I know!” Rainbow cried. She shrank to her haunches, no longer able to look Spitfire in the eye. “I know, it’s my fault, I’m responsible, and I’m sorry! I want to take it all back...I want to make things right!” Spitfire stomped both forehooves on the floor, bringing her head down at the same time. The force shook a nearby table. “You want to make things right?” “Yes! I’d give anything!” “Then what are you waiting for? Bring them back.” Rainbow paused. “Wh...what?” “Bring them back. Give me back what you took from me. Give me back my team!” Spitfire was shrieking like a banshee, her anger giving way to madness. “I-I can’t...that’s not-” “Don’t you DARE tell me it’s impossible! Bring them back! Make things right!!!” “Spitfire-” “DO IT!!!” Rainbow curled herself into a ball, trembling on the floor. She couldn’t answer, and that fueled Spitfire’s rage even further. Her eyes flashed in a new level of fury, and she brought her right hoof up and around. She decided, then and there, that she didn’t care what Rainbow had to say. If Rainbow Dash wouldn’t make things right, then Spitfire would simply make things better. The yellow pegasus cried out, a heartbeat away from hitting the poor mare, when a strong voice called to her. “Spitfire!” With a gasp, Spitfire looked up to the source of the voice. A third body had entered the room long ago, seeing everything. Soarin’ stood a few yards away, gazing at his ex-captain with a mix of worry and disappointment. The two of them locked gazes, unspoken words passing between them. After a long moment, Spitfire clenched her eyes shut. She fumed, a low scream bubbling in her throat. As the growl increased in volume, her raised hoof began to shake. She was fighting every urge to hit the mare before her, but it was a losing battle. Finally, unable to contain herself, Spitfire turned her head, sighted the small table, and punched the innocent furnishing with all the rage she now held. The table flew across the room, sending its’ contents pouring onto the floor. Spitfire pounced on the upturned table, landing on it at an angle - her slam left a sizable impression of a hoof. She continued to abuse the unfortunate wood, breaking the top and the legs alike, until finally her fury was spent and all that remained of the table was kindling and large chips. The whole time she was trampling, Rainbow kept her eyes shut. She visibly flinched at every sound of splintering wood, and understandably so: she could easily see herself being that table instead. As the sound of cracking furniture faded and the sound of Spitfire’s heavy breathing remained, Rainbow chanced looking up. Spitfire was leaning her body forward, panting in exertion. Here eyes were wide, staring without seeing upon the destruction she had wrought. The way she carried herself - bared teeth, maddened eyes, fluttering wings - Rainbow was reminded of a feral beast of the wilds, caught in a fight-or-flight situation. Except this beast would not only fight once, but she would also seek out the next. Soarin’ slowly walked across the room. As he moved, Rainbow was able to see his right wing for the first time in years. While she had heard that Soarin’ was disabled, she was never able to appreciate the scale of his injury. His left wing was healthy and strong, what you would expect from a former aerial ace such as he. However, his right wing was frail, thin, and in every other sense simply unfit for flight. It was similar to how Rainbow’s wings were - unused and left to wither - but in a different sense. Rainbow’s neglect of her wings had been by choice, and that didn’t seem to be the case with Soarin’. And then Rainbow Dash saw why. Further along the bone, where the wing met torso, a disturbing bald patch in his coat revealed a trailing scar. It was obvious that, while surgery had been involved during his time at the hospital, the scar was caused by no scalpel or other tool. Whatever had torn the skin had emerged, from the inside - and Rainbow had no trouble guessing what could have so viciously rent the stallion’s skin. In the end, it meant that Soarin’ was physically incapable of using his right wing. All connection he had to it was cut off, and constant pain in his nerves reminded him of that. It was a wonder - a miracle - the wing had stayed on his body at all. Soarin’ crossed the room in a few shallow seconds, calmly walking up to Spitfire’s side. He gently touched her shoulder, and as before, the two of them locked gazes. They didn’t speak, but communication passed between them. After a moment spent in the stare, Soarin’ broke away and left the room as quietly as he had entered. As he left, Spitfire spoke again. Her voice was strained - the scream she had held inside had left her parched. “You’re so cruel.” Rainbow didn’t answer; she didn’t know how she could. “You probably have no idea of what you’ve really done to me, do you?” As before, she had no answer. Spitfire continued, finally walking back toward her. “Ever since that day, I haven’t been able to get over the pain. Four of my closest friends dead, another seriously injured, and the name I had strengthened was left to die in the wind. I had promised my old captain that I would make the Wonderbolts better than ever, when he left the team to me. And all that ended...with you.” Slowly, Spitfire made her way to Rainbow Dash. But instead of glaring at her or making to strike her, the fiery pegasus sat next to her. Rainbow looked up, both surprised and anxious. “You impressed me, kid. Every time I met you, you seemed to have this...this gusto in you that just wouldn’t be tamed. Your Sonic Rainboom, that tornado you formed...heh, even how you were so desperate to get my attention at the Grand Galloping Gala. You were determined to make it into my team, and I made sure you had the first best chance to prove yourself. “I wanted you on the team. Did I ever tell you that? I pulled quite a few strings to get you the first spot at the tryouts. There was that gusto in you that just intrigued me, told me that you would stop at nothing in order to get what you wished.” ‘What I wished...’ Rainbow mused. She felt a surge of guilt as she recalled her first meeting with Alucard. “I have to wonder, kid...did I ever do anything to you? Did I say something that set you off, led you to do this to me?” It was a real question with genuine pain behind it. Rainbow continued to look up at her, softly shaking her head. “No, never.” “So you ruined me just because it was fun, is that it?” “N-no, I-I...” She couldn’t bring herself to explain. Spitfire sighed. When she spoke, her voice began to break. “You really don’t know anything, do you?” Rainbow Dash turned her gaze down, once again finding silence as her only answer. ‘This was a mistake, this was all a mistake, I never should have mentioned this, I should have talked Applejack out of it...’ “Everyday, I see the same sight,” Spitfire muttered. Her voice was low, as though passing on a hidden shame. “I’m reminded of the tryouts and that attack whenever I look at my wings...or see a cloud in the sky. Hell, even when I see innocent pegasi flying above. But the worst is that balcony. What kind of joke was that, really? Giving me a house with a second-story balcony, somewhere I could look down on the earth? It’s just another reminder of all that I lost, all that I can never have again. “What happened that day, at the tryouts...it really did ruin me. It didn’t just take away the team that I had hoof-picked from years of candidates. It didn’t just disable my closest teammate and leave him unable to enjoy the skies anymore. It also took away all the years and effort I had put into the team before I made captain. “Did you follow the Wonderbolts when they were led by my captain, Microburst?” Rainbow slowly shook her head. “Just as well, he was probably before your time. I never wanted to take his place, kid; I was happy just being on the team. But after flying together for several years, he entrusted the name to me. He made me promise that I would take the Wonderbolts to new horizons, ones he had never shown us. “And I tried my best...I made new training regimes, I held higher standards for my team, I made every show as perfect as I could. The choices I made were for the good of the team. We never even had a headquarters in Canterlot until after I was captain. I helped us find a home in the royal city, and I worked for it with every fiber of my being. I knew I was doing my captain proud with every choice I made. “But then, you came along,” Spitfire continued, a trace of hatred seeping in her tone. “You show up with your talent and your pride, and you get my attention. You make me think you’re Wonderbolt material, and I make exceptions to get you an opportunity in the tryouts. And instead of proving to me that you’re worth my time, you...you...” Spitfire closed her eyes, berating herself for breaking up like she had. As she drew in her grief, she seemed to look older than she was, like the events of the last few years had stolen more life from her than normal. She sucked in a shaky breath - her voice cracked when she spoke again. “I can’t escape it. Every day, I see it again. I see that dark thing hitting me and my team, see the ponies I had carefully chosen over the years just...lie on the ground...I-I see Soarin’ in the urgent care center, thrashing about as they save his wing...and I see you, too. I see you everywhere. “And the more I think about it, about all I’ve lost...the more I see you. Even when I remember flying with Microburst, I see you. When I remember the day I signed up...I see you, and what you brought with you. You ruined me, ruined everything I’ve worked for, and I...” For a long moment, Spitfire was at a loss. She brought a hoof to her mouth, mentally chewing over her thoughts, trying to find some form of control. She sat like that, taking deep breaths to keep herself from breaking. A long minute passed, until finally... “I...I-I can’t do it, Rainbow Dash. I c-can’t forgive you.” That simple statement tore through Rainbow’s thoughts like a stone through water. The words burned into her, mentally branding her with the heat of a crucible. For a moment, Rainbow stared ahead, unmoving. That moment was doomed to die, however, as her shoulders began to heave. Restrained sobs broke through her, filling the air with their clattering sound. The cyan pegasus gently placed her head in her forelegs, face-down, throwing her vision into darkness. Hot tears began to soak her face. Rainbow cried. She cried with the pent-up anguish of the last four years. She cried with the lingering fear of storms and flying and everything she now hated. She cried with the memory of her attempted suicide, both on the rocks and in the library. And when she ran out of reasons to cry, she just kept crying because it gave purpose to her pain. Spitfire let her cry until all that was left were dry hiccups and the sound of sniffing. The stuntmare stood up, turned, and looked at Rainbow’s heaving form. She spoke clearly, choosing her words carefully. “Do you still want to make things right?” Rainbow tried to respond, but was interrupted by a heavy sob. “Do you?” “Y-yes,” she managed. “More th-than anything.” Spitfire nodded. “Then be better than me.” The former exile halted her sobs long enough to lift her gaze. She questioned Spitfire with her eyes, clearly confused. “Look, kid, I’ve made my choice. I’ve chosen to stay here and take care of Soarin’, and I’ve chosen to stay trapped in the bad memories of my past. I’m letting myself stay here, and I won’t move forward again. It’s too late for me, but you...” Slowly, Spitfire extended a hoof toward Rainbow Dash. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten all the good you’ve done. Not only have you helped Equestria with monsters I’ve never seen, but I still remember how you saved my life in Cloudsdale. And despite how I can’t ever forgive you, I won’t let you become like me. I won’t let you stay down. “Now get up. Get up, and move forward. Be better than me.” Rainbow’s lip trembled as she stared at the offered hoof. She untangled her own forelegs and reached upward, hooking her hoof around Spitfire’s. The latter waited a moment, then pulled up and away, helping Rainbow to rise. When she stood, the two of them looked at each other. Somewhere in Rainbow’s mind, she knew that the two of them had found equal ground. It had taken tragedy and agony to reach it, but now they stood - not as captain and trainee, not as idol and fan, not as victim and criminal. Simply two mares who had finally reached an understanding, bitter though it was. The cyan pegasus wiped her eyes and sniffed one last time, feeling calm - true calm - settle over her. A weight had been lifted from her, the burden of her guilt. It wasn’t perfect, and would leave an impression on her forever, but it was finally gone, and it was simply relieving. When she opened her eyes again, they were steady. Sad, yes, but steady. She nodded. “Th...thank you.” “For what?” Spitfire asked. “For letting...letting me apologize.” “Ah,” she breathed. “Don’t mention it, kid.” Rainbow nodded again, giving a small smile. “I’ll go now. I won’t bother you again, I promise.” Spitfire returned the nod as the former exile turned to leave. By the time she reached the door, however, the fiery pegasus called out one more time. “Hey, Rainbow. One last thing.” She turned her head. “Mmm?” “Those clouds from yesterday, the ones that appeared out of nowhere...did you have something to do with that?” Rainbow blinked, not at all expecting the question. ‘She must mean the clouds that Alucard summoned yesterday,’ she mused. “N-no, but...I think I know the one who did.” Spitfire hummed, looking at the mare with a knowing face. “Something big is about to happen, isn’t there?” “...yes.” There was a heavy meaning behind the answer, one that Spitfire picked up. “I see...” Spitfire glanced over to the side of the room, where the remains of the table were left haphazardly. She let out a quick sigh. “I have faith in you, kid.” Without waiting for a response, Spitfire turned and walked out of the room, following the route Soarin’ had taken earlier. She rounded a corner, then was gone, leaving only the echo of her hoofsteps. Soon, those were gone too. Rainbow gazed after her for a moment, left with no choice but to accept her words. She hesitated, the smile on her lips growing more solid. The previous night, she had given thought to testing the bridges in her life, to see whether or not she had burned them. Somehow, by divine grace, this particular bridge stood scorched but strong. After giving a nod to the empty room, Rainbow opened the door. The mild air of the outside rushed in to greet her, and she stepped out into the sunlight. Applejack was resting against the side of the house, her hat pulled over her eyes. She spoke without looking up. “Sounds like things got pretty hairy in there.” Rainbow looked over, silently giggling at the sight of her friend. “It wasn’t so bad.” With a grunt, the farm mare twisted and stood. She walked over to the pegasus, looking her square in the eye. “You okay?” The former exile looked behind her, taking in the details of the house one more time. She held her gaze on the neglected balcony above their heads, mulling over all Spitfire had told her. While before, the balcony had served to confuse Rainbow, now it served as a symbol. It was neglected, decaying, and unappealing - but still it was strong, and there remained a chance for it yet. “I have faith in you, kid,” Spitfire had said. Perhaps there was a chance for Rainbow Dash, too. She let out a satisfying sigh, bringing her head forward once more. “Yes, I am.” A moment passed as the two of them simply enjoyed the day. Before long, Rainbow Dash began walking back toward Ponyville, muttering about how it was nearly lunchtime. Applejack guffawed, rushing to catch up. That was the last time Rainbow Dash ever saw Spitfire. Despite the history the two of them held, both were a little stronger after what had happened that day in her house. It was a meeting that was wanted by neither, but needed by both...and Rainbow Dash was not the only one to smile that day. End chapter twelve Author’s comments: So ends Act II of this story. I believe this is one of the chapters that I have enjoyed the most, and definitely my favorite of the interludes, particularly because of the chance to touch on the Wonderbolts one more time. They can be very deep characters if you give them the chance. Co-author’s comments: This was an ‘interlude’? Dear sweet Celestia! I wasn’t expecting this many pages, despite knowing what the chapter was about beforehand. It also surprised me as to how much help I was in the interlude as well. Not really any major details, the “Don’t you know what you took from me” line was originally all bold. The first time Aaron would have had bold text in the story itself, but I thought it stuck out too much like a sore thumb, and suggested making it all capital letters. Both of us liked it, and I like it because it shows more power in the words, rather than having the words stick out. Stay tuned from here on, folks. Act III is where all the excitement is. Next chapter: Rain without Rainbows, Act III: The Prestige. As promised, Alucard brings his storm to Equestria. Before he can fulfill his goal, however, he’ll need to deal with Celestia herself. Yet he is confident, because even Celestia cannot hope to guess what he has planned.