==\=\=\=
Chapter 2: An Inauspicious Start
===\=\=\
I was crying. A hoof rubbed my back. “Whats wrong my little rainbow?” My mother asked. I turned around. She was there with her almost flowing hair, wearing a tie-dye dress. We were at some fancy retreat somewhere and the room was filled with over a thousand unicorns, all gathered to reminisce and chat each other up.
“All of the other unicorns keep looking at me mean and Aunt Abigail kept calling me a baby!” I bawled. “Nobody likes me here!”
She pulled me into a hug. “ssshh they’re just jealous of you. A lot of them wanted to have foals like you but they couldn’t and they don’t know what to do. They don’t mean it.” She kissed my head just behind my stub of a horn. “Here, lets go outside and see the snow.” She let me climb on her back.
We walked out on the deck of the lodge, the mountains in the distance were silhouetted by the setting sun. The cool air made me glad to be furry for once. “Your father and I once hiked up a trail in those mountains, he he forgot to bring a tent along because he had to make room for a tambourine, we had to stay in a cave for a night.”
She reached around and lifted me off her back and held me close. “You’re different my little rainbow. Who knows, maybe soon more foals will come around for you to play with.” She scooped up the snow that had accumulated on the deck in her magic and piled them up into a snowman. “Until then, I how about I show you how to make snowballs?”
The ten year old me scampered around in delight. Watching mom do magic was always enough to make me forget about the world.
==/==
“….You think he’s gonna you know, freak out or something?”
“I’m not entirely sure yet Spike. Take a look at this book, it’s clearly a spell-book of some kind.”
As I started waking up from my dream, I felt the immediate effects of whatever… I did last night. Then through the haze, I remembered, something had happened last night. I was in grandpa’s study when someone hit me with something.
“If my hypothesis is correct, then this human must have fallen through a portal like the one Sunset used. He might wake up scared or disoriented. We have to wait and see.”
Carefully I shifted myself in the bed. Fortunately with everything that happened yesterday, I hadn’t taken off my vest or cloths. Digging into my side were two cylinders, a can of pepper spray and a small stun gun hidden in the butt of a flashlight.
I heard a rumble. “Twilight, when was the last time you ate?” The voice that sounded like a kid asked. “Well I’ll go get some lunch for you and whoever this is just in case.” He said. After a moment I heard a door close.
Through one eye, I peaked out. The room was bright but without windows. The walls, ceiling, and floor all seemed to be made out of shades of some really expensive looking stone. I could hear my captor sitting nearby humming to herself. ‘crap, they’ve taken me somewhere.’ I thought. Clearly this wasn’t my house.
For the moment, I decided not to worry about why they had taken me hostage, I had to figure out a way to get out. With one captor gone, and the other presumably occupied, now was as good of a time as any. Quietly I slid a hoof in my vest and withdrew the cylinder of pepper spray. Holding it to my chest, I rolled over.
My captor took notice. I heard her come over, muttering to herself, still humming some upbeat tune. “Hmm, he should be awake by now.” she said. I heard hoof steps, which only made matters worse. Who in the unicorn community would kidnap another unicorn or work for someone to kidnap one?
Jumping awake, I propelled the can towards her with my magic and bombed her. She shrieked and fell to the ground. Briefly I noticed that it was indeed a purple unicorn, someone I couldn’t immediately recognize, but then I hadn’t been to a reunion in over a decade. ‘Priorities’ I thought to myself. ‘Escape now, questions later.’
I ran out the door and almost bolted down the hallway before I remembered something. Yep, forgot my spell-book. I scooped up the precious tome in my magic and stuck it to my back with a spell. “Hasta la vista baby.” I said.
“Wait don’t go!” She shouted. I grabbed the rest of the can of pepper spray and coated her a second time. “AH IT BURNS! SPIKE GET MILK, EMERGENCY NUMBER 243!” I heard captor #1 shout. The unicorn was rolling around on the ground in a tangled mass of purple.
The symmetrical hallway was lined with identical doors. I took off running. I passed some kind of mini-barnie or a kid in a barnie costume, I wasn’t sure. He was shouting something but I didn’t really care.
Taking a left I ran into a pair of… unicorn knights? “Halt!” they shouted.
“Screw that!” I shouted back taking off to the right. A dozen spells for this situation came to mind. “Slime, everybody loves slime!” I shouted coming to a stop around another bend.
Turning around, I focused on the spell, bent my head and out from my horn shot a torrent of green slime, coating the hallway. Slime was a fun spell, the first part makes a friction-less surface.
Sure enough the knights rounded the corner and slid straight into the wall at painful speeds before discovering the second component of the spell.
When they tried to get up from the pile they were in, they found themselves pinned in place. The slime turns into a heck of an adhesive when you stop moving. I stood there catching my breath for a moment as another pair of guards slid into the same trap and became pinned. “Don’t hurt him!” I heard Captor #1 shout. I watched as she too slid into the wall with a squeal of shock.
Taking off down a flight of stairs, I found myself in a large circular room. Picking a door at random, I entered what appeared to be a giant library. Books stacked up to the ceiling, shelves lining every wall. The whole thing was quite a sight, and I’ve seen NYC’s stacks before.
I heard what sounded like more guards coming. I needed something to keep them preoccupied. “Ooh, I know.” I said mischievously.
Taking the tome off my back, I flipped through till I found what I was looking for. “The fantasia golem.” I looked over the arcane script of the spell. In my spell-book, this was written as the Self Animating Construct spell but I had always called it the fantasia golem spell on account of how I first learned it by making all the cleaning implements come to life at home.
Fixing the spell in my mind, I read the incantation and metered the power. A glowing hologram of the spell construct lifted off the page and hovered in front of the book. I poured a bit of power into the spell, more than I thought I should, and then the construct began rotating rapidly before releasing a violet pulse through the room.
Books, furniture and papers flew towards the center of the construct, adding onto each other. By the time it had emptied one wall, the pile had taken on a humanoid shape, using two inverted chairs as shoulders, a pair of cushions for eyebrows, and a mouth lined with tomes. I slumped against a desk for a moment, I hadn’t expended so much magic in such a short time since… ever.
Another facet of the construct was that once formed, it would continue on animating what it couldn’t add to its bulk. So by now the golem stood over 10 feet tall and had a whirlwind of animated books flapping around it with more items jumping up from their desks. All in all, this is kind of the reason why I’ve never used this spell with so much power before, frankly it would scare the ever living shit out of everyone.
The library doors burst open. The purple unicorn, flanked by a dozen guards stood there. “There you are….” She stopped as the golem turned towards her.
“Bye-bye.” I said waving.
The golem understood. With the sound of scraping gravel, the golem unleashed an avalanche of books on my captors. Captor #1 to her credit, threw up a violet shield in response.
“BOOKS NOOOOOO!” She shouted as the books assaulted her. “I JUST WANTED TO- UGH” She was cut off as the golem pounded her shield again.
Looking for an exit, I face palmed. Marked next to another door was a sign in a script that my parents had taught me that read as follows. ‘Main Entrance’ with a green line drawn out on the floor leading out of the library.
Following my way out I found the entrance to be unguarded, presumably everyone had been called inside.
Opening the enormous doors with a little magical persuasion, I took off running down the gravel road beyond.
==/=/=/==
I ran. I ran far. I ran so far away.
The large castle loomed in the distance, despite the night it seemed to still cast a shadow over me. I reached for my phone only to find it had been removed, as well as my wallet and keys. Crap. Not that it probably mattered. The castle was the obvious sign something was up. Where could there be such a massive structure on earth? Outside of maybe Disney, nobody builds giant castles anymore.
I looked around, nope no mice, definitely not Disney World.
That left the obvious question, where the hell was I? I stumbled as the path shifted to cobble. I considered lighting my horn up but that didn’t seem like a good idea when I was trying to hide.
There was a town up ahead, at least I thought so. The houses looked quaint to say the least. Few had lights on. Exhaustion from all that magic was creeping in, my limbs felt like lead as I crept along the path. “Damn” I swore as I tripped on another rock. I fell against a porch where I sat for a moment.
If I wasn’t in some kind of Disney park then where the hell was I? Who were those unicorns in the castle? None of it made sense. I’m not that loved in the unicorn community but I’m one hundred percent sure that they wouldn’t bother to kidnap me.
That purple one.
I thought back to the last reunion I went to. Who was that? “Think dammit.” I said softly. I tried to visualize all the earth unicorns. Maybe Mabel? No not her, the coats were too different. Dominoes? No too young. There simply wasn’t any that purple...
If there wasn’t a unicorn on earth that matched my captor…
On earth…
“Son of a bitch.” I said out loud. If there was no unicorns on earth that matched her, or any of the knights I saw, then…
‘This human must have fallen through the portal’ She had said. The portal.
“Ha.” I laughed. “HA HA HA.” The laughs kept coming. “AH HA HA” kept laughing. I rolled around on the porch laughing like a madman.
If there was no unicorn that matched her appearance on earth, and I had somehow fallen through a portal, then 2+2 = 4 and I in a drunken fit found a way back to my people’s homeland, Equestria. The land of peace, harmony, and cake.
“Is somepony there?” I heard a regal voice ask.
All these years, all this time, and the portal was in my grandpa’s study.
“Pinkie Pie if this is one of your pranks, it is not the time!” the voice shouted. Lights went on in the house behind me.
The laughing subsided. ‘Time to go’ I thought. I tried to stand up but the ground was spinning. “Crap.” I said planting my face into the ground.
“Cmon legs, work.” I said, dragging myself up again. The world spun again protesting. I was in real trouble now. I remember what happened once when Grandpa overused his magic one day. It was one of the scariest days of my life. Spots swam in my vision as I tried to get up again only to fail once more.
My eyelids felt like lead as well. I closed my eyes for only a moment. I heard a door open. “Oh dear!” someone said. I didn’t care by now, exhaustion overtook me finally.
=\=\=\=
I slammed the door behind me. “Stupid school.” I mumbled as I dropped my bag by the door. “Stupid butt faces.” I kicked it.
“VVVKBBB MFFFFSFFF?” A kazoo tooted. I looked up. Dad was in the front room, a kazoo stuck in his mouth, a guitar around his neck and an amp sat plugged in behind him. A drum set sat in the corner.
While grandpa’s passion was magic, Dad’s passion was music. He could play anything with anything while playing something else. The more ridiculous an instrument was, the more he loved it. That's why we have a tuba in the basement. He played a mean harpsichord, which was impressive cas he doesn’t have hands.
“YBIBIBA PPPRRR?” He chirped. Which translated to ‘Something happen at school?’
“The other kids, they wouldn’t let me play kickball with them.” I said plopping down on the couch. “They said I’d pop their ball or cheat with my magic. My horn isn’t that sharp!” I crossed my arms and blew my hair out of my face.
“PPPffffwwww” He blew. ‘they don’t mean it.’
“Why do they have to be so stupid and mean. I’m just like them, they just don’t want me there. And don’t say make friends because they all think I’m weird.”
He walked over to me and sat down, the guitar slapped against the couch. ‘one second’ He tooted.
He pulled the guitar cord out with his magic and stuck the plug in his mouth. He looked so ridiculous with a plug in one side and a kazoo in the other, I may have giggled a little. He made a squeaking sound with his nose.
He lit his horn up with some magic and the guitar squealed. I giggled again. Dad always was doing crazy stuff like this. “PFFFFFF” He tooted, bringing the guitar up to play. As he strummed I found myself lost in his music, the troubles of the day long forgotten.
I sat on the couch, resting my head on Dad’s lap as he played all the way till mom and grandma came home from shopping and shooed me off to wash up for dinner.
=====\\\====
Something warm and liquid was shoved in my mouth. I gagged and coughed. I tasted a noodle.
“Sshhh dear. Its alright.” An angelic voice said. “Its just a little manastrone soup. Just relax, it’ll help.”
I felt another spoonful push against my muzzle, this time I didn’t fight it and swallowed. The rich broth filled my aching stomach. I felt an electric jolt, like I had just taken a shot of coffee.
My caregiver fed me another spoonful. This time I greedily ate it.
I opened my eyes, the bowl was sitting on my chest. I slurped down the whole thing, vegetables be damned, it was the best thing I had ever eaten ever. I dropped empty bowl, feeling completely filled up.
Turning, the spoon was floating in the air, suspended by the magic of my caregiver, an alabaster unicorn with curlers in her deep purple hair. She blushed reflexively. “please dear, a lady shouldn’t be seen like this but your aid was more pressing.”
“I um…. Thanks.” I croaked. “I guess I owe you one.”
“No no, I simply cannot allow that. A friend in need is a friend indeed. My name is Rarity Belle.”
I sat back in the well made bed. My strength was rapidly returning. She handed me a glass of water. “What was in that soup by the way?”
“Manastrone soup darling. I always keep a can around for when I’ve exhausted myself, it always does the trick.” She mumbled something under her breath. “So, may I have the honor of knowing your name?”
“My name is David, David Moon.” I said.
“Well Mr. Moon, If you don’t mind me asking, what were you doing laughing hysterically on my porch at Celestia knows what hour?”
Right, Equestria. “I’ve had a bit of a bad day and lost it I guess.” I said meekly.
“I can certainly see that. Who goes around wandering at night, exhausted and out of magic. A unicorn your age should know better.” She chided. “At least nopony’s house was on fire this time.” She said, trailing out of the room. “So what exactly do you do Mr. Moon? I’ve never seen clothing quite like yours.” I heard a tub being filled.
I looked down and frowned. I was naked, not that it mattered too much since everything was covered up but still its never good news to wake up next to a strange woman naked. Clothing was sort of a necessity for unicorns that worked and lived out in the open. My pants were hung from a rack on the other side of the room.
“I’m a detective actually.”
She charged back into my room. “Oh you must tell me all about it, do you hang out in smoke filled rooms interrogating bad ponies, or chase criminals down dark alleyways, or bring down international smuggling rings through relentless investigations!?”
“Um, look lady, I think you’ve been reading too many novels.” I said. She deflated a bit. Shit, I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. “Not that there aren’t detectives that do that sort of stuff though. I just sort of get leads to talk that’s all.”
“You must grill them for hours until the perps finally crack under pressure.”
“Something like that. Usually they’re pretty unresponsive before I get them to talk.” I said.
“Well you must tell me all about it, but first.” She gestured to the hallway. “You are absolutely filthy dear. I hope you don’t mind but I’ve prepared a bath for you. If you don’t mind, I’d like to have a look at your vest as well.” She said.
I gave her a puzzled look.
“I’m a fashion designer you see, and I’ve never quite seen material or stitching quite like that.”
I continued staring.
“Well you see, your book prevented me from removing your vest so I could launder it too.” Her white cheeks turned rose.
I looked on my back. My spell-book was stuck there still, bound by the spell I had used on it. Funny, I hadn’t really noticed the thick tome digging into my back until now.
I removed it and handed my vest over to her. No sense arguing, if she wanted my cloths she could have them for not reporting me to whatever authorities I may or may not have assaulted.
I stepped into the bathroom which had a large claw foot tub in the center of it. A warm bath sounded amazing right now. “Thanks for all of this.” I said, turning to her.
“Darling, I’m the element of generosity, its the least I could do.” She said with a flick of her tail.
It didn’t take me long to slip into the me-sized bathtub, the hot water felt good on my sore muscles. I don’t think I’ve ran so much since high school. I’ve been doing a lot of things I’ve never done before since finding myself in Equestria.
Equestria.
Of all the unicorns on earth that had to end up here, why did it have to be me? Any one of them would give up everything for a chance to come back here, well except Abigail, she wouldn’t abandon the limelight for anything.
I thought about what I knew about this place but I honestly was drawing a blank. My parents certainly didn’t talk about it much. I think they were just trying to spare me, stranded on earth after all. Grandpa talked about it but he only really cared about the magic, as far as he was concerned, it didn’t matter if it was New York City or the city of Lunestria, as long as the lights were on and the garbage was collected, he was content. The only one who seemed to care any was grandma and well, she only really talked about Lunestria, the gleaming city of mages. I remember asking them once after mom and dad were gone why we left Equestria, neither one ever gave me a full answer just that something happened and we had to leave abruptly.
Maybe I should have talked with other unicorns about it after all. I hardly knew anything about this land. Here I was mooching off of some stranger after laughing like a lunatic on her doorstep.
=\=\=\=
Cleaned up and tub drained, I used a little trickle of magic to wring the water out of my fur and hair. There was a vanity off to the side. I stood in front of the mirror. My hair was due for a cut, not that I was impressing anyone. I looked at the two marks on my backside and frowned. I needed my pants.
=/=/=/
Dried and clothed I made my way downstairs to what appeared to be a dress shop. Here was my first glimpse of Equestria’s wealth, each gown was studded with at least a fortune in precious stones and everything was just casually sitting out, there wasn’t even a lock on the front door, just a latch.
The white unicorn was busy cooking up breakfast in a kitchen at the back. I stood in the doorway mesmerized as skillets and dishes floated around. The elegance with which she moved everything about, so effortless. Her hair twirled around her back, matching her tail which wiggled around tantalizingly as she… I realized she was stark naked and I was staring at her butt.
If I wasn’t leaning in the doorway I’d have fallen over. I looked away. Dammit what was wrong with me? What was wrong with them? This is why we have pants! ‘Don’t stare at her butt, don’t stare at her butt.’ I thought as she worked.
“Breeeeakfast.” She chimed, setting the table at once. “Sorry I don’t have much in my cupboard right now. I wasn’t expecting company after all.”
“Its alright.” I said. While yes my assistant of the month would probably make something “healthier” in the name of improving my diet, the setting reminded me of better times at home, a couple steaming bowls of oatmeal, a couple grapefruits, and a plate of toast. My stomach grumbled at the sight. I started eating. It wasn’t until after my third piece of toast that I noticed my host was leaning on her arm staring at me from across the table.
I took a swig from a glass of orange juice. “Is something wrong?”
“No, Its just your mane darling.” I self consciously ran a hoof over my head. “Oh no nothing’s wrong, I’ve just only ever seen one other pony with a mane like that. I don’t mean to be nosy or anything but my gal pals and I have a little wager that its natural or an elaborate dye job and if you don’t mind, certainly you might be able to weigh in on the matter.”
Pony? Was that meant as an insult or… I mean I AM the size of like a Shetland pony but that’s not the point. I’m about as close to a horse as a human is to a gorilla. Same sort of shape but that’s it, nothing else. Those things always creeped me out. Like one time some talking head tried to say we should breed with horses to try to solve our fertility problem. Its bad enough I’m substantially younger than anyone of my species to date, and my prospects of ever meeting someone my age were zero point zero, but then to have somebody out there spread the idea that I should be breed like a stud or something, fucking ridiculous.
“No its real.” I said opening up my spell-book. Something had been bugging me since the bath tub. I flipped to the back of the book, spread out across two pages, reconstructed from my grandfather’s memory was part of the spell array that they had used to transport all of them to earth. While it was most likely incomplete, owing to the fact that my grandfather and the mages that came over were only involved in part of the ritual, his thoughts on the subject were what I was after.
In the corner of the page was the information I was looking for. He described the ritual itself.
‘Initially, a modified teleportation spell was considered to quickly evacuate the city, the power requirements to teleport multiple citizens scales linearly, however the power to transport over distance scaled non-linearly rendering the whole spell too taxing. In a stroke of genius, it was discovered that two surfaces could be connected through a higher dimension. While the power requirement for transporting multiple citizens was not solved, since the two surfaces were in essence on the same location, the distance needed to travel was that of a single stride. Unfortunately for us, this invention was what I fear lead to our stranding in this magic-less world for without a prepared surface on the other side, we cast our line out to the sea without direction.’
Basically it confirmed my suspicion that whoever kidnapped me was ridiculously powerful.
“Oh drat, I owe Applejack 20 bits then.” She started clearing off the table. I looked up from my reading.
She glanced at the page from across the table. “hmm, I’m not much into spells but my friend would absolutely love a chance to look it over. Magic is sort of her obsession. The poor darling doesn’t have much time to get to it these days unfortunately. If you’re having a magic problem, my friend would be the mare to go to.”
I was about to thank her but then a loud voice shouted from the front. “RARITY!”
“Rainbow Dash how many times have I told you not to shout in my store.”
“SOMETHING HAPPENED AT… oh.” I nearly choked on my toast. It wasn’t a unicorn that barged in. It was like a unicorn, minus the horn and added a set of wings. Apparently her parents had no imagination when it came to naming though. Her hair was a mess of colors like mine. “Sorry Rares, something happened at Twi’s and she needs our help.” Pegasi, that's it. They lived in clouds and had a city far far away from Lunestria and that’s about all I know about that.
“Who’s your coltfriend? He’s gotta cool mane.” She said. Rarity’s tea came spraying out of her mouth.
“I.. what… he’s not my-” She stammered.
“I’m just a customer.” I lied. She floated... She floated over the table flapping her wings way too infrequently to keep herself aloft. I could tell she wasn’t buying it.
“Well whoever you are, I guess I’ll tell Twi that you’re busy then. With a customer.” She giggled. She said zipping out the window. OK now that happened. I mean.. I’m not exactly the strictest student of physics, after all, I’m a extra dimensional magical creature that can seemingly violate the laws of physics on a whim but flying… ponies? I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised but FLYING PONIES. Come on.
“Don’t mind her, Rainbow Dash can be a bit much sometimes. I suppose I should go see is going on at Twilight’s.” She said sounding mildly annoyed as She showed me to the door. “I do hope to see you around town again, maybe under more ideal conditions?”
I found myself at a loss for words, I don’t think I’ve ever really had anyone flirt with me before. I mean I’ve had people proposition me before, being a unicorn and all tended to attract some weird folks, but I’ve never had a descent conversation with another unicorn, let alone have one flirt with me before. “Thanks, I’ll see what I can do.” I replied sheepishly. She smiled and gave me a twirl of her hair before closing the door on me.
=-=-=-=-
I stepped off her porch, and with no real direction in mind I started off. She waved to me as she trotted along in the opposite direction.
Without any other options really I walked towards what looked like the center of the town. Uni... Ponies of all kinds milled around the area standing around stalls that from the looks of it sold every kind of greenery imaginable. “Hey mister, wanna buy some apples?” An all too high pitched voice shouted.
I looked down. Standing in front of me was a little pony er… pony girl that couldn’t have been more than eight or nine years old. I must have stopped in my tracks.
“Fresh from tha farm. Ma sister bucked’em this mornin, only two bits per bushel.” She said “Ma big brother’s right over there!”
Now I said I am not in any way shape or form the same as a horse, but the red pony she was pointing to certainly would make me question that assumption. Not only was he about as big as an average horse, he wore a yoke around his neck like he was some kind of draft animal. I mean at least he was wearing something.
“So waddaya say? Wanna buy some apples?” She squeeked.
“Um.. no sorry.” I replied at a loss and with that, she moved on. I stared at her for a moment before catching a look from her big big brother that said ‘move along’.
Quietly I mixed into the crowd of all the gathered people, it wasn’t that hard after living in New York for so long. In fact, it was sort of refreshing to not be so short as to be mistaken for a guide dog. When I get back to earth, I have to make a trip to japan, just to get this feeling again.
Turning a corner I spotted a pair of guards scanning the crowded street, their spears poked up above everybody. Quickly I ducked down an alleyway before they could spot me. I walked into another square, this one had less of a crowd.
I started walking down the street in another direction when a pair of winged guards landed. Without a crowd to hide in they spotted me immediately. “Hey you there! Stop” They shouted. I took off in the other direction. I honestly thought I could hide a bit longer but at least I was topped up again, whatever was in that soup was freaking amazing.
Townsfolk split out of my way as I ran by. Skidding around a corner, another pair of guards stopped in their tracks and looked at each other like Abbot and Costello. I grabbed their helms and smacked them together, dazing the unprepared couple.
Rushing past, things opened up into a town square with streets branching off in every direction. Shops lined the square with another open air cafe taking up one Before I could cross the square, another pair of guards dropped from the sky in front of me. “We got him trapped.” One of them said.
I looked around, sure enough several pairs of guards had flanked me on each side.
“Easy now, I know everything is confusing but we just want to talk.” One of them said. Like heck. You don’t drop a golem in their barracks and just talk. They circled around me, closing in slowly. Looking around, none of them seemed to be unicorns which at least gave me the advantage, unless my admittedly limited knowledge about the other races of ponies was wrong. I had magic, they didn’t.
I began charging up a spell from memory. While people generally were nice and or indifferent to unicorns on earth, there was still always that possibility of running into someone with less than good intentions. Generally speaking, most unicorns stayed in crowds or kept people around, its also one of the reasons why we have assistants, they tend to discourage the riff raft. Me however, I don’t have that kind of fear of people but I’m not that naive either. I’ve seen the worst of humanity up close and personal, it sticks with you.
With a flash, my horn lit up, blinding the guards and knocking them back. With them dazed, I took off to the left. With them dazed, I charged off to the right. With them dispatched, I bolted forward. With them dazed, I spun around and charged through the guards behind me. I dove for the nearby table.
“He went this way!” One pair of guards shouted taking chase.
“I see him!” Another shouted.
“This way, I think he went past me.” Yet another.
Four pairs of guards took off in four directions chasing four identical copies of me shot off in as many directions. I peaked out from the table of the cafe that I had taken refuge under to check that all had indeed left. My head ached but at least I had gotten away. Splitting my focus like that always left me feeling woozy when it was over. The spell was deceptively simple, much like every racing game ever made, the images will always stay so far ahead of them until the spell runs out, hopefully drawing them away.
For extra measure, I cast a spell that in hindsight, I should have done in the first place. The air around me shimmered for a moment as the spell took effect but other than the small draw of power, there wasn’t any discernible effect. I poked out from the table again. The cafe was empty except for some serving staff and a pink unicorn having a light lunch. None of them seemed to pay me any mind as I walked out from under the table, not that they would. Un-noticability, an extremely practical spell, it basically acted on the mind saying ‘Nothing to see here, move along.’ Its not true invisibility, but from what I learned from grandpa, spells like this, being simple and discrete, were often the most wicked when it came to fights. Everybody expects the fireball, nobody expects to not notice anything. As long as I kept quiet and didn’t do anything too distracting, nobody would notice me walking away. Of course it doesn’t hold up against scrutiny or someone who’s looking for you specifically but it will hopefully keep others from noticing me.
“Phew, that should keep them for a while.” I said to everybody, not that they would notice. “Now to find somewhere to hide and let this blow over.” This town was large enough for me to find somewhere to lay low until I could figure something out, I might even be able to convince that Rarity to hide me for a little bit.
“An impressive display. Its a shame you’re leaving so soon.” The pink unicorn said as I was walking by. I froze. Why don’t you have a cup of tea and stay for a minute, I won’t tell the guards.” Her voice was calm and smooth.
I should have moved on, but a cup of tea sounded nice about now. She patted the seat next to her which was a warm, nice looking cushion. I sat down next to her. “That was quite an interesting display of magic. Was that a multi-focus duplication spell or were those animated mirror images? Splitting one’s focus four different ways requires tremendous talent.” She said taking another sip of her tea. I looked up at her. Sitting, she was a full head, and horn, taller than me. A cup of tea floated in her golden aura and a piece of half eaten coffee cake sat in front of her. “I once used a similar trick to escape from the clutches of a party of unruly minotaurs.” She poured two cups of tea. “Honey?” She offered. I absentmindedly nodded.
I took a sip. I’m not a tea fan but I could get to like it if this was what there was around here. Something was bugging me but I couldn’t place it.
“That’s good tea.” I said, feeling somewhat dazed. I really should have been going but something was telling me I should just stay here for a little longer, maybe just blend in some more. “I..I really should be going, I have to, to find a solution to something...” I rambled. The lady just chuckled and refilled my tea.
“You remind me of a former student of mine, she was always racing around too busy to stop and enjoy life, thankfully she seems to have grown out of that for the most part.” Using her magic, she cut a piece of the cake off with her fork and brought it up to eat. “Mmm delicious. I wish you well on your quest, I find a good library is usually a wise place to start.”
As I turned to get up, I felt something sharp poke me in the back. “Don’t move.” A gruff male voice said. Guards charged in all around me. These guys weren’t the pansies I was running from earlier either, they wore much heavier armor and were armed with very large pikes. I thought about charging up a spell but the unicorns among them had already lit their horns up in anticipation. “Now then, I’m going to slip this on your horn and we’re going to go have a nice chat.” My assailant said. He must have been talking about a power suppressor. Before he could slip a ring on, well something big happened. Something just dumped a lot of power, enough to buzz my horn. I saw a magenta flash and then someone shouted.
“STOP!” A familiar voice shouted. “Stand down! He doesn’t know what he’s doing!”
The guards I could see instantly shouldered their spears and the unicorns dismissed their spells. The guard with the spear to my back held steady. “CAPTAIN!” She stomped in anger. I winced at the sound of cracked stone.
“Princess, I refuse to let my guard down around this creature.”
“Captain…. I’m ordering you to-”
“Unhoof him at once you ruffian!” Another familiar voice shouted. It had to be Rarity. The captain huffed but kept up his spear.
“I think this has gone on long enough Captain Twinkle Shield.” A calming voice said.
I heard a collective gasp. The spear clattered on the ground. “Ppppprincess!” My kidnapper stammered. I looked over. The pink unicorn next to me was no longer a pink unicorn. Instead what sat next to me calmly with a cup of tea was a large white alicorn, scratch that, THE white alicorn with unmistakable flowing hair, a rainbow quite unlike my own, huge angelic wings, and a massive horn.
I may not have known much of Equestria, partly due to my parents desires, but there was one story my grandparents insisted I knew, the story of the wrath of Celestia, who banished her sister to eternal darkness just for standing up to her. To summarize, you don’t want to cross her. According to them, she ruled the night and day, immortal and unquestionable. Also she apparently banished my ancestors from Equestria at some point.
I gulped.
“I see you’re finally using the garrison I assigned to you.” I turned around. Captain Twinkle whosit stood at attention. He was well… short. Like really short. If I wasn’t sitting next to a literal goddess, I probably would be laughing. Not that I would ever laugh at an officer of the law.
Standing behind him were three people I recognized and three more of complimenting shades to fill out the rainbow of the group.
“Why don’t you girls come and join us, its a nice blend of tea.” She said offering up the pot.
With the gathered gang seated, the guards retreated to where they came from, all except Captain Twinkle who stood at ready leering me from across the table. To add to that, I finally got a better look at the purple one who started this whole thing and realized she too was an alicorn, which probably wasn’t good since the guards reported to her as well.
We sat in relative silence. The other alicorn took up a seat across the table from me while Rarity sat beside me.
“So David, how are you liking Equestria so far?” Rarity asked breaking the tension. “You seem very… acclimated to...everything. I am deeply sorry Twilight has gotten you into this...situation.”
“Yes, you um seem to be handling everything better than I expected.” The alicorn, presumably Twilight said nervously looking between me and Celestia.
“She means you’re pretty good at being a pony for a human.” Dash blurted out.
Rarity dropped her cup, spilling on the table. Twilight twitched and shifted about on her seat. “Why would I be a human?” I asked confused at the whole thing. Celestia just sat there calmly as ever.
“Because you know, you come from that freaky mirror world, right Twi, Twi?” Dash bumped her friend with her wing. “whoops, I broke her.”
“Y'all tellin me you weren’t a human before comin through that mirror?” The orange pony who looked a lot like that little girl I saw earlier butted in.
“Ooh he’s gotta secret I know it!” The other friend blurted out. “Lemme guess!-”
“Thank you Pinkie Pie but I think we ought to let David explain for himself.” Celestia interrupted. “I sense that he’s not quite what you girls might think he is.”
I took a long gulp of my tea only to find I had already drank it up. Its not everyday you have a potentially vengeful goddess staring you down. Whatever I say next could be the last thing I say at all.
“I um well the reason I act like a unicorn so well is because I’ve always been one and I’m not sure why you would think otherwise. As for that mirror world, yes there are humans over there, in fact there’s over seven billion of them but there’s also a population of unicorns living there in exile from Equestria. They all uh came from a place called Lunestria and got stuck on earth where I was born.”
I looked around, only to find Celestia looking down on me, studying me intensely. “Um you’re not going to banish me now are you?” I asked meekly.
She cracked a smile. “Why would I ever do such a thing to one of Equestria’s lost sons.” She wrapped one of her soft wings around me and pulled me close. Her coat was angelic soft. Memories of mom surfaced only to be quashed with a collective gasp from the assembled group. “Princess, is there something wrong?” the one pegasus that had been averting my gaze finally spoke up.
I felt something warm and wet hit my head. I looked up, Celestia was in tears. “I had given up hope on ever finding your people, you don’t know how happy I am to see them alive and well.” She squeezed me closer before suddenly releasing me. “Wait there’s someone you must meet. Twilight Sparkle, bearers of harmony, please meet me at Canterlot this evening. There is much to explain. I cannot celebrate this alone, there will be a feast to celebrate this occasion. In the meantime, I believe you might have a lot of questions for one another. I have no doubt you’ll show David kindness and compassion, and David, I ask that you respect everypony.” She said giving me a wink.
Rounding up some of the flying guards, she gave us a final farewell before taking off, bolting towards a castle in the distance, seemingly suspended from the side of a mountain. “What the hell just happened? I said out loud to the other slightly confused ponies.