//------------------------------// // Hydia, Reeka and Draggle // Story: Colgate's Rants: Hasbro Franchise Edition // by StormLuna //------------------------------// As you all know I have had all sorts of patients come in but so far the only one not to come to me in pony form or some other form of what Equestrian creature they are. One day though, I would have some odd patients, who actually scheduled in advance, come in to see me and when they came in I wound up seriously wishing they would have gone somewhere else. Here is how it played out. It was in the afternoon and I was looking in my schedule and I saw three final appointments, Hydia, Reeka and Draggle. My first thought was, "What kind of fucking names are those?" Right on time, they showed up. In the door came three incredibly hideous abominations of humans. Come to think of it I think my sister showed me creatures similar to them in her My Little Human comic books but I couldn't be sure. The first thing I noticed though was their stench. Sweet mother of Faust, I had never smelled anything that repulsive before in my life so I quickly ran back and got a mask over my face. Whether it offended them or not I wasn't sure but the first thing I did was tap on the sign regarding payment. Naturally their response would piss me off. They claimed they didn't have anything to pay me with because they came through a portal and lived in a volcano. What the fuck? How the hell does something live in a volcano. Then it hit me, these three are the witches from Ponyland. At that moment I realized that this was likely going to be a trio of the most disgusting patients any dentist has ever had, in any dimension! Draggle The first one I would take back was Draggle. She seemed a bit different from the others. She didn't smell as bad and rather than having a nasty attitude about her, she seemed a bit nervous. Now she wanted to talk but like I have told so many other patients, I told her that she may incur extra charges and that terrified her. She cried about not wanting her mother to abuse her. Now she seems to be old enough that that wouldn't happen but who knows given the nature of her mother. I got her to open her mouth without any problems and ugh, her breath stunk and her teeth weren't much better. She only had a couple of cavities but her teeth were horribly stained and even worse, she was developing gingivitis. Well shit, there wasn't a ton I could do for that gingivitis but I could take care of those cavities and those yellowed teeth. Want to know the bad thing? Even using my most advanced whitening agent, I could not get her teeth completely clean, that is how bad they were. I made a decision right then and there, I would use the same equipment on all three of them but then I would dispose of it. I sure the hell did not want anything that was in their mouths inside the mouth of another pony. Believe it or not but getting her taken care of was not all that bad. I could tell she was nervous but chances are she has had to deal with worse things in life, much worse things in life. Hydia After I got her done I took Hydia, the mother back. Remember how I said that Draggle's odor wasn't quite as bad, well this one smelled worse, much worse. I honestly thought I was going to throw up in my face mask and I cringed when she sat down in the chair. At that moment I figured, "Not only am I going to have to get new equipment, I'm going to need a new chair as well." She could tell I was uncomfortable so she happily opened her mouth which only made matters worse. Ok, when she did this I ran back and put a second mask over my face which blocked the stench, well for the most part. With her I also decided to put latex hoof gloves over my hooves because I didn't want to get anything nasty like her saliva in my coat. I was not pleased when she opened her mouth because a majority of her teeth were missing and the few that she did have were in horrible shape. I gave her a look of disgust and snapped, "You know what? Fuck it, you are missing most of your teeth and the few you do still have are in such bad shape that they are beyond salvaging." I didn't even want to rip the damn things out because I didn't want those nasty things in my garbage. Obviously she wasn't happy and threatened to cast some sort of spell on me and turn me into something else. Give me a break, a fat ass human cast a spell on an incredibly powerful Alicorn? I simply laughed and burned her with a few bolts of energy. Yeah she screamed in pain but I didn't care. The good thing was that after I finished burning her she cowered down in fear when I lit my horn up for a fifth time. I laughed, "You cast a spell on me? I think not!" Reeka Like I said she wasn't thrilled that I wouldn't do anything to address her dental problems but oh well. I sent her out front and grabbed the other daughter. As I led her back I actually began to gag. After getting her set in the chair I went back and put three more masks over my face. I could see the look of disgust on her face when I came back with five masks over my face but you know what?, I don't care. I would need that many just to prevent myself from smelling her. Like her mother, she gladly opened her mouth and of course I would not be happy with what I saw. I saw that she was missing three teeth and the ones she did have were the filthiest I had ever seen. That wouldn't bet he worst of it though. Between several of her teeth were lodged RAT TAILS! Yes, rat tails. This was so disgusting that I actually wound up throwing up in my face mask and had to rush to the restroom to clean up and get new masks on. After spending ten minutes recovering from what I saw and getting cleaned up, I put TEN face masks on and headed back out. I gave her a glare and despite me knowing what she did I asked her how the hell she got those tails stuck between her teeth. What she told me would cause me to throw up all over again. She told me that she eats rats, other rodents and bugs ALIVE! Well you probably know what happened when I heard this. I threw up again so I had to go and get cleaned up again! Now it is official, Reeka is the absolute most disgusting creature of any sort I have ever dealt with. I also decided that I would not take them back to their portal, I decided I would do Ponyland a favor and go throw the three into Tartarus and hope Cerberus didn't leave his post again. Once I got cleaned up and got more face masks on I took her up front and told the three that I would not bill them anything but I did do something else, I stunned them multiple times. Getting Rid of Them I had to keep stunning those three multiple times because I did not want them coming to until I did what I had planned. Once it became completely dark I decided to levitate those three to Tartarus. I know my harem will wonder where am but I know Starlight will keep the girls in line, she is always so good at it. Once I got them to Tartarus they finally began to come to. Now I had to make an important decision, where to put them. Given that she is the least bad of the three I put Draggle in a cage not too far down in there. Yeah she was scared getting locked up in a cage in there but oh well, I'd think it would be preferable to living in a volcano with her bitch mother and disgusting sister. Now with Hydia, I took her much, much deeper down because I thought that if she was to be able to get loose, assuming that mutt was to leave his post again, that she might be a genuine threat, well to other ponies' nasal passages anyway. Now for Reeka, the most disgusting of them. I had special plans for her, very special plans and these would involve not only making life miserable for her, but miserable for an undesirable I made over 300,000 bits off of a while back. I took her to the bottom most bowels of that place and put her in the same cage as Cheese Sandwich! Now of course he immediately began throwing up bile since he didn't have any food to throw up. Along with that he began screaming that it was bad enough I took organs from him but making him smell her was cruel and unusual punishment. Apparently she knows something about him because she began screaming that putting her in a cage with an annoying party pony was beyond cruel and unusual punishment! Once I got her locked up I headed back up and told Cerberus that he better not let them, or anything else down there escape or he would not like what I would have in store for him. He nervously agreed and I flew home. Now while I would have loved to go and join my harem for some fun I decided something had to be done first. After those three were in my practice, I realized that they had probably contaminated it to the point where it could never be cleansed so I had only one option. I torched it and decided that I would simply start from scratch. Now your everyday pony would have been charged with arson but hey, I'm the number one princess so I have nothing to worry about. Yeah it would take a couple of months to rebuild but hey, that will be two consecutive months I'll have with my harem! In the end it took nearly three months to rebuild my practice but it was all worth it. My new practice is larger than my old one, I have newer, more modern equipment and I have made a decision. I will NEVER take in any patient that filthy ever again. If it doesn't come to me in the form of a pony or some other natural creature that you would find in Equestria, I'm not seeing it! I'll just haul it to Tartarus because it is likely evil. One more thing though, the next patient I get from Ponyland will be punished severely for this. Who knows, I may go through that portal, drag one back to Equestria with me, work on her and then take something to compensate me for my work and having to deal with those witches. After looking through my sister's comic books, I know exactly who I'm going after. I'll just need to take plenty of sedatives with me.