Mid-September, 1005 A.D.
Observation number 23
Subject shows further stability, a marked difference from when Subject and Observer first met. Instead of wildly leaping about*1, Subject walks to and from various stores*2, seemingly performing tasks for the Cakes for the day. When queried, Subject stated that she ‘no longer set up parties’, since she wasn’t ‘up to it’. This further shows that there is something that is not correct. More observation is required for the day to see if this is truly a fact.
*1(leaping to describe in one word for jumping, skipping, hopping, trotting, strutting, and twirling.)
*2(needed stores did not include the party supplies, ribbons, or little trinket toy store.)A.N.: There’s no way that she’s given up the things she loved to do. It’s part of her cutie mark! Even more lies! I’m hot on this trail of deceit!
Observation number 29
The Subject displayed a darker tone all day. Watched through the front window and door, found that the Subject stayed ‘busy’ all day. When visiting, Subject seemed to cheer up slightly. Discussed how the day’s sales were and how the various migrations had affected business. Tone of voice stayed neutral, with only a few moments of her previous attitude cropping up.*
*(The topic of upcoming Nightmare Night and the start of Cider Season were the cause of this swell in ‘cheeriness’.)
Discussed potential costumes. Subject seemed especially happy to hear that I the Observer was going to take part in the festivities. Once outside, the Subject returned to previous state of mind. This shows that she is indeed putting on an ‘act’ to appear ‘normal’. This consisted for the rest of the day.
A.N.: While I was watching, there seemed to be physical repercussions that were not expected on my side. Considering the consistency and how it occurs only when observing the subject, I have decided to write it down. Chest pains is the most predominant of the issues. Heaviness in hooves and back. Itchy ears. I can’t think of much else at this time. I may be coming down with some kind of sickness, which may hamper future observations.
Observation number 49
Subject hasn’t shown any signs of talking with inanimate objects since the ‘incidence’. According to others’ reports of the incidents previous to the one that caused the split, Subject would ‘speak’ to them while alone. Each observation is done while Subject is both surrounded by others and when alone.
So far, Subject isn’t left alone for more than a few hours unless she is asleep. While unconscious, she seems to lose more of her colorization. During her Rem cycle, the Subject seems very unsettled. Crying slightly in her sleep. I It was difficult to watch. After 25.6 minutes, the subject settled back down and continued sleeping.
A.N.: It’s been 39 days since we broke up. While she seems to have an outward appearance of being in a more stable state, when alone she shows the most of the problems. She hasn’t been sleeping well. Due to my studies and observations, neither have I. The signs of sleep depravity have begun to show for Pinkie. I, luckily, have found a magical stimulant that helps my focus and energy. I am tempted to tell or maybe even offer the solution to her, but in her sleeplessness, I may find more evidence of her old habits. Spike’s overreacting.
Observation number 61
The Subject has continued her evening walks as first described in Observation number 50. As a result, Observer has also begun to trail further behind, at a distance of 9.7 klicks.*1 Subject has not interacted with anyone during these walks, though she does pause at specific intervals.*2 During these moments, she consults a piece of paper, often breaking into sobs.*3
*1(Distance increased after Observation number 53 when Subject’s ear twitched when Observer stepped in puddle. Each evening afterwards, an extra klick was added as more twitches occurred, displaying how Subject still knew she was being followed.)
*2(These intervals do not seem to be for Subject’s benefit as she has yet to show signs of exhaustion while on these ‘walks’. Exact timing of these pauses are difficult to determine as Observer has to maintain stealth with difficulty.)
*3(Several attempts have been made to see this ‘paper’ but all have failed. These attempts are as recorded previously; spyglass, magical copying, levitation, searching private domistary, and approaching while Subject was in the middle of crying. After the last attempt (which failed, as noted in Observation number 58), Observer has stopped trying to read the note and waits the required distance away.)Observer has increased indoor research as a corresponding action. Still no signs of the ‘imaginary friends’. Considering how the parchment Subject reads during these walk often appear from midair*4, Observer will suspend questions or disbelief and accept the possibility of these ‘friends’ being any and everywhere at once.
*4(After previous studies on ‘Pinkie Sense’ and various skills have proven to be futile, it wouldn’t be advisable to try and start that particular observation notes.)
A.N.: I don’t know how much longer
The scratching of quill on parchment came to an abrupt halt when a purple claw rested against purple fur. A single blood-shot orb rolled slowly towards the interloper.
“Twilight, I think you’ve gone overboard.” Spike spoke firmly. “You haven’t slept in days. You look really bad.”
The rumpled unicorn half-glared at the drake. Her mane was a mess of knots and incorrectly layered strands. Her pelt was in clumps, flecks of dirt and mud darkening it. The purple orbs were riddled with red lines while large heavy bags rested underneath. The mare didn’t respond and turned back to her large blue book. The dragon growled lightly at the dismissive action.
“Twilight, I wrote to Princess Celestia. She knows how ridiculous you’ve been acting and-”
“You WHAT?!?” Twilight swung back around before her eyes shrank to pinpricks, searching the tree library. “I don’t have enough notes to prove my point! I need more time- I have to get ready to present my findings! Why did you do that Spike!?! It’s too soon!”
“No way! It’s been way too long!” Spike clenched his fists as he shouted back. “You aren’t even trying to really see what’s been going on! Pinkie Pie is trying to get better and you are getting worse without her!”
“AM NOT!” The unicorn shouted back, eyes closed as she wobbled in place, mind darkening for a moment. She opened her gaze slowly with a shake of her head. “I’ve… just been busy with research.”
There came a solid knock from upstairs. Two sets of eyes shot towards the balcony where the sound came from. Without waiting for anyone to answer, the door opened with a flash of white magic, showing the solar princess standing there. Her gaze was guarded and face neutral.
“Princess!” Twilight bent one leg while stretching out the other, bowing low. “I’m so sorry, I’m unprepared for your visit!” The mare tried to grab her notes and papers with a beam of magic but instead scattered the papers as her magic backfired due to exhaustion. A single eye twitched at the mess. Lunging, she tried to manually grab the notes, leaving dirty hoof prints on each one.
Celestia remained impassive as she hopped down from where the balcony met the stairway. She trotted over to the frantic unicorn, looking towards the young dragon. She gave him a slow nod before focusing on her student.
“Twilight, stop.”
The studious mare stuttered to a halt. A muscle in her left back hoof spasmed. She didn’t meet her mentor’s gaze, searching over the papers instead.
“Look at me, please.” The solar ruler spoke sternly.
Twilight flinched. Timidly, she turned in place, ears flat. Seeing the lavender orbs staring back with concern and displeasure shining in their depths. “I… I can explain.”
“You and Pinkie Pie have broken up.” Celestia flatly stated as she stared down her immense height. “And you haven’t finished talking about what went wrong.”
“Yes! Right, exactly!” The lavender mare perked up briefly as she clutched the wild stacks of papers. “It’s all here for why we broke up and how she is still not progressing and -”
“Actually my student, it is you who are not progressing.”
“W-what…?” Twilight spoke softly, her heart clenching painfully at having failed her teacher.
The white alicorn levitated over a single paper that had escaped the unicorn’s grasp. Looking over it critically, she explained. “Pinkie Pie has for the past few months been talking with professionals about her tendency to talk with objects. She’s made great progress from what I understand.” Letting the paper float down slightly, she gazed flatly towards the smaller pony. “And she has reached out to friends and family about what has happened, gaining their advice and acting upon it.”
The mare slowly brought her two hooves closer to her barrel, mouthing a silent response. When it became obvious that there were none forthcoming, the Princess kept on.
“You’ve even marked upon it in your… ‘observational notes’.” When she caught sight of confusion in the bloodshot eyes, the solar alicorn waved a hoof towards the purple lad watching behind the desk. “Spike has sent me a copy of every note you’ve made. I also checked with the professionals that Pinkie had sought help from, to be sure every pony in the kingdom is happy and doing well.”
Twilight scuffed a hoof along the ground nervously. Her mind felt lighter and ever more floating as the minutes passed that she didn’t desperately write in her notes. The room went quiet as everyone focused on the swaying unicorn. Each motion got worse until finally she crashed on her right side. Spike rushed forward, sliding to a stop by the purple shoulders.
“Twilight? Twilight?!” The young drake leaned down to listen to the lavender chest, exhaling in relief. “She’s ok. Probably just asleep.”
Celestia trotted over and bent down to lay beside her student. She cast a scanning spell to be sure that it was merely ‘sleep’. Her breath caught at what she found. Worried, she began to cast remedial enchantments.
“I’m afraid not. That ‘stimulant’ Twilight found has only suppressed her exhaustion and mental stress. Without proper sleep or any sort of relaxation, she has passed out with very low stability.” The Sun Princess smiled tensely to the dragon. “I’m casting some spells that will help her recovery. We’ll have to wait for her to get better before doing the intervention.”
Spike leaned back with a tight smile of his own. Together, the unlikely duo waited in the middle of the library for the foolhardy mare to get her much needed rest.
-NKP-
The darkness seemed even heavier as various octaves of wailing rang through the air. The purple mare had hunkered down, both hooves covering her face. Scrap paper flew around her, causing her sides to sting painfully. Inside, tucked into a corner of her body that the unicorn tried to ignore, was a familiar whimper.
The monotone voices still tried to drone out an answer to the unicorn’s problems. The voice deep inside the purple barrel shouted back counterpoints.
Twilight’s mind was a swirl of pain, half-formed thoughts, and confusion. Her ears, when they weren’t hit by the whizzing pages, twitched and flicked to each of the voices ringing out. Tears pricked the corner of her eyes.
The winds continued to rise, turning slowly into a fierce roar like those found in tornadoes. Just as the mare was about to shout out in frustration, there was a blinding flash of light, dissipating the winds, darkness and parchments. In the center of the sphere stood a proud navy alicorn, wings flared as she stood stiffly. Her long trim horn was lit with a light blue aura. Her gaze, stern and guarded, swept over the area as she trotted closer to the huddled mare.
“Twilight Sparkle, stand.”
The unicorn hesitantly rose, eyes looking uncertainly about the landscape that was now a pale gray. The room took on a more hazy feel as her mind floated up and away from its previous terror.
“Pr-Princess Luna…? Why are you…? Am I… dreaming?” Twilight inched closer to the large mare.
“You are Twilight Sparkle. You have had this particular dream many times now.” Luna looked dispassionately around. “But do you know what it stands for? What causes this to haunt your mind?”
“What? What do you mean?” The studious mare didn’t look at the night princess as her heart sank. “I-I’ve never remembered this dream after I’ve woken up.”
“Hm, this I’m not sure of, but I can feel that there is more to this dream. Coming from deep in your mind. Something you do not want to acknowledge.” Luna’s voice seemed to echo in the emptiness.
Twilight’s ears flattened. She looked up when there was a flash of blue light coming from the other mare. Seconds later, the prevalent wailing appeared. Except this time the sound was clear and easily defined. It brought to mind a set of sky blue orbs that overfilled with water. Pink mane straightened to flat rows.
“Pinkie Pie…”
Luna tilted her head thoughtfully. She hummed with a nod. “Indeed, I suppose so. And what of this one?” She used another spell, sending away the one sound of crying to focus on the other one; one that was much more restrained and stifled.
It took the dreamer longer to recognize the sound. When she did, she flinched back half a step, eyes shrinking. “I… I don’t know why it’s…”
“Do you not? Truly? There is no pain you could image that would cause your inner mind to cry out?” Luna didn’t let up, stepping closer with her stern look firmly in place.
Twilight clenched her teeth painfully. “I-She- There was a reason why I thought we should stop dating! Really!”
“But your mind cries out in pain and sorrow.” Luna looked off to the murky distance, letting the wails fade and the monotone voices return. “And these, are they your reasons? The sounds that grate on you in your dreams and that command the very parchments themselves to attack you?”
“Well-I mean, yes but-I-there was-it seemed-”
“Wake now Twilight Sparkle and remember this moment. Think and reflect on ALL that has happened, not only your fear; a thing that drives many ponies to ruin and to create enemies where there were none before.” The lunar princess’ voice boomed out as she flew into the air.
The dream world swirled wildly as the purple unicorn felt her body fly towards the ground which dropped away. The wind howled in her ears as she reached out towards the floating alicorn. Her words were quickly lost in the noise while the darkness rapidly brightened to a blinding white.
“Think about what your dreams were trying to tell you!”
“Twilight? Princess Celestia, I think she’s waking up!” A gentle claw gripped the purple shoulder, moving to help the mare upright.
Twilight groaned, moving her right hoof from under her to rub at her temple. Mind clearer than it had been in weeks, she blinked in the bright light provided by the candles lit around the room. Moving slowly, the unicorn tilted her head, giving it soothing cracks as the kinks cleared out. Once completely upright, she looked around the library, freezing when she noticed the large white mare staring directly at her.
“Princess Celestia! I’m sorry, I don’t know what happened, uh, were you waiting long?” The studious unicorn struggled to stand properly. A firm white hoof and purple claw prevented her from doing so.
“It doesn’t matter how long it was. You need much more sleep, though for now, we must talk.” The solar princess didn’t smile and instead pulled over the neatly organized stack of papers and notebooks. “I believe, considering how your fretful dreaming turned gentle, you spoke with my sister while you slept.”
The lavender unicorn blushed and nodded as her mind flashed back to what they had talked about. “Y-yes… Uhm, I… I think I need to review some of my notes…”
“Yes. However, I want you to read them out loud. And wait for my word before you continue to the next entry.” Celestia wore a tiny frown as she eyed the pile.
Twilight blushed as she lifted the first and read it out loud. Afterwards, the room went quiet. The silence built until the pressure made the unicorn flatten her ears anxiously. Only then did the older royal sister issue the word to go to the next one. This extended silence after each reading continued all afternoon as the three listened to how far the unicorn went as she ‘observed’. The more recent the entry, the further upset Twilight grew as she looked back with a much clearer mind.
After she realized that her coldness towards Pinkie had caused the color loss and long crying sessions for the party mare, the librarian’s stomach sank into her back hooves. Noticing that her own ‘symptoms’ were not so much random as a subconscious reaction to her misbehavior, most of her innards filled with lead and dropped away, leaving a gaping ache in her center.
Finished with her recitement, Twilight hung her head in shame. The ruler of the day lost most of her neutrality, and frowned sternly instead.
“Twilight, do you realize how your actions appear? The watching, the spying, the coldness, the unfair treatment?” Celestia leaned down to catch her pupil’s eye. “Can you see how all of this has been affecting you my student?”
Hot tears streamed down the purple muzzle. “It… hurts! She… What she did…”
“It hurt your feelings and betrayed your trust.”
“Yes!” Twilight wailed as she threw her head to the left.
“But what you did in return was just as hurtful. Betraying and injuring a one time lover, and even worse, a close friend, is just as hurtful.”
“Yes…” The younger mare whimpered as she thumped to the ground, hooves around her barrel while silent tears continued their trek down her face. The dragon, chewing his lip anxiously, stepped up and put a sympathetic claw on the shaking form.
Celestia sighed. She closed the distance and wrapped a large wing around the sobbing mare, pulling her close. “There, there… It’s going to be ok.”
“Is it? Because I don’t know if it ever will be!” Twilight leaned back just longer enough to look tearfully to her teacher before ducking forward once more, her breath turning to hiccups. “I just don’t know what to do Princess… What do I do now…?” The muffled question was weak and drawn out as the questioner felt the remainder of her paranoia shatter away.
The solar ruler sighed and shook her head. The motion caught the distressed unicorn’s attention. “My little pony, I nor anyone else can tell you what you must do now.” The princess waited until dual orbs peeked upwards then kept on. “You must look inside and decide for yourself; do you try to reform the relationship you had with Pinkie Pie before or do you stay as friends? Either way, you should speak with her, the treatment you have shown her is not becoming of anypony.”
The purple mare shivered as her heart screamed out. She shook her head, hoof going to cover her muzzle. Her mind tried to present facts of what happened while another side of her argued back that she had not been clear-sighted when she first made those ‘observations’. The confused mare shook her head with a half-whimper.
The alicorn shook her own head in return. “Twilight, you must decide before you go to talk with her. If you are not clear on what you’ve decided, you will continue to hurt her and yourself.”
“What… What if we don’t get back together in a more… romantic relationship…?” The unicorn faced forward, not noticing the rest of the room or the young lad hiding in a corner. “How could we ever be ‘just friends’...?”
“It’s happened before. If both parties try, they can remain social with one another in a friendly manner.” The alicorn mused. “It can be difficult at first, especially as feelings do not always listen when you are around the one you used to want to be romantically involved with. But you must think about the future and how much you can stand being or not being with the other pony involved.”
The room went quiet for a time. Twilight thought, each one floating up and disappearing in a pop, unable to corral them in line. She grit her teeth, trying to keep things orderly while her heart sobbed openly. She looked up through a river of tears to a clean stack of papers on her desk and hesitated. The sun princess leaned closer to the mare beside her.
“Twilight, do not fear your notes or studies. Just realize your state of mind when you do make those notes.” The calm, collected tones of the royal mare helped to ease the uncertainty in the other’s mind.
Assured, the studious mare levitated over a few sheets of paper and a favored quill. Labeling the top with ‘pros’ and ‘cons’, the mare went down the list, adding a line for every thought that came to mind. Soon, the quill was moving nearly at the speed of light, the list leaning further into the positive side until her mind went silent and it was her heart that spoke on the papers. The positive side was quickly filled with how the blue orbs had sparkled, the pink mane flew through the air, the light hooves skimming along the ground and the unicorn’s side and more. Twilight stopped looking at the page as she continued to cry, mentally picturing each word to correspond with the feature that floated up from the depths of her heart.
Celestia leaned in to whisper in the purple ear. “I think it’s clear what you want to try and do.” She nudged the other mare then pointed with her nose towards the scattered stack of ‘cons’ and the large pile of ‘pros’ still upright.
Twilight looked to where her mentor pointed. She bit her lower lip as the last of her anxiety that held her back drifted away. She felt a shy claw on her right side. Spike stared upwards with caution shining deep in his eyes.
“Are… What are you going to do…?”
As the purple unicorn stared at the lad, she noticed that he had large bags under his eyes and his whole body sagged in place. The librarian reached out and pulled the drake close for a hug.
“I’m going to do what I should have done a while ago. I’m sorry you had to put up with… all this…” Twilight jerked her head to the desk where her notes overflowed. “I hope it’s not too late to try and get Pinkie Pie back…”
The Sun Princess smiled and stood up steadily. She nodded to the pair and flew upwards back to the balcony she had arrived in, silently. She gave one last parting farewell. “Take care and if you need help, please, ask before it gets too out of hoof. Good work Spike, you take care of Twilight just as much as she does for you.”
Twilight gave the the dragon in her hoof grip a gentle shake. “Alright Spike, let’s get another good rest.” The mare glanced out the window and winced at the darkness she saw out there. “ And then, after a nice breakfast, we’ll try and see if Pinkie is still willing to put up with a just as crazy mare and her great friend dragon.”
Spike nodded with a large grin, following closely as the duo went upstairs. He watched, uncertain that the mare would actually follow through, and relaxed in place when she did lay down. The lad went to his own room, dropping into the bed with a gusty sigh.
“It’s about time…”
The morning seemed brighter when the occupants woke up the next day. Anxiously, the dragon went to check on his guardian and found she wasn’t there. An herbal scent came from below. Frowning, he went for the kitchen, his fears mounting as he thought to the last time the purple unicorn had tried to cook.
Inside, Twilight held a steaming cup of wake up tea in her hooves. She smiled guiltily towards the lad. “Good morning Spike. I was going to make us a nice little breakfast but uh… heh heh… I remembered what happened last time.” She put a hoof to her head sheepishly.
Spike sighed playfully. “It took me and Pinkie an hour to get the burnt stuff off the ceiling.” He froze when he realized who he mentioned. Seeing only a sad smile instead of the extreme paranoia of the last few weeks, he tried to perk up the mare. “Anyways, I’ll make us the best ‘starting over’ pancakes ever and… uh…”
“And I’ll go and try to find Pinkie Pie, if it’s not too late.” Twilight looked determinedly upwards as she spoke before going back to her warm mug.
“Right!” Spike agreed heartily. He stepped further into the room but paused as he felt his throat work up a burp. A lick of flame came with the sound, revealing a small scroll addressed to the pony. “Message for you Twilight!”
The unicorn’s eyebrows twitched as she levitated it over. Opening it, she read the message quickly, brows furrowing as she did. Without looking up, she magically pulled over several dictionaries, searching through their pages before slumping in place.
The dragon, his claws full of cooking supplies, watched over his shoulder. Catching sight of now exhausted purple orbs, he faced her head on, drawing closer when she offered the paper towards the lad. Spike set the supplies down and grabbed the page.
Twilight,
I had meant to say it last night but you and Spike both needed the rest. The next vocabulary word you should learn about is ‘confirmation bias’. I believe it will be helpful in understanding.
Your mentor, available for any questions should something come up,
Princess Celestia
Spike looked at the different text books on the table and found they were already opened to the term. He read those to himself as well.
“Confirmation bias refers to a type of selective thinking whereby one tends to notice and to look for what confirms one's beliefs, and to ignore, not look for, or undervalue the relevance of what contradicts one's beliefs.”
The boy thought hard about that line before his mind cleared as he thought about what the purple unicorn had been doing recently. “Oooooh…”
Twilight sighed, rubbing her forehead. “Yes. And it makes sense… Now that I’m thinking more objectively and not in such a biased way.” She pulled at the lids under her eyes with a half groan. “I can’t believe how I acted.”
Spike scrunched his face but didn’t comment. Instead, he turned away and went back to cooking. The studious mare sighed and wrapped her hooves around the mug once more.
“Thanks again Spike.”
The two went back to their own devices. It wasn’t long before they had a large stack of pancakes, and for the unicorn another cup of tea, feeling more confident of the day’s outcome. Twilight made sure Spike knew he had the whole day to himself while she went to find the keeper of her heart.
The day seemed brighter than it had been for weeks. No one in Ponyville seemed to notice the recently reclusive mare strolling about. She went straight for the local bakery, knowing that the pink pony usually worked at this time.
A tiny bell rang as the unicorn pushed open the door. She wore a timid smile, preparing to greet those at the counter, when she felt the temperature of the shop drop to freezing. As early as it was in the day, nopony else was there except the two Cakes and Twilight. The married couple, having heard the sound, came from the kitchen with careful grins of shopkeepers but dropped them to instead glare at the librarian.
Mr. Cake drew himself to full height, casting an intimidating figure even if he was slimmer than the average stallion. He reached out and held onto his wife’s hoof to reassure and restrain at the same time. Mrs. Cake had instead leaned forward, scowl heavy, as she planted herself solidly in front of the stairway and opening to behind the counter space.
“What do you think you are doing here…?” The low, scornful threat veiled pitifully as a question came from Cup Cake. She barely noticed how her husband tightened his hold for a second as she spoke.
“We aren’t going to let you continue hurting Pinkie Pie.” Carrot Cake’s voice was more neutral than the mare’s but no less stern. “It would be best if you kept away if you don’t plan on making a proper apology.”
Under the harsh stares, Twilight hunkered down, ears flattening. “I’m… I came to talk with Pinkie Pie… I mean, really talk. I know I’ve been very foolish and I’m very sorry…” She gulped as tears pricked at the corner of her eyes. “If… If it’s not too late, I’d like to talk with Pinkie…”
The two didn’t lessen their stiff stances.
“You have made a serious mistake Twilight Sparkle. A very big mistake.” The female baker raised her tone slightly from the low octave of before. “Pinkie Pie is like a daughter to us. And you’ve hurt her far worse than needed.”
The orange stallion kept his brows furrowed. “And until Pinkie says otherwise, you aren’t welcomed here. Please leave.”
Even though he had said ‘please’, the studious unicorn could tell it wasn’t request but a demand. Slowly, backing up the entire way, she left. Before she exited completely, the unicorn asked a question softly.
“Where is Pinkie Pie…?”
Mrs. Cake sniffed as she turned her head away. “We said she should go for a morning walk as well as one in the evening.”
Twilight perked up slightly. Her mind flashed to the party pony’s well traveled park path. She nodded silently and finished leaving the bakery. She didn’t linger and rushed for the park. Her hooves twitched to go into the bushes. Snorting in annoyance to her previously demented methods, she kept on, glancing to each of the benches dotting the landscape. The usual ponies were sitting about, but no shocking pink or even dimmed pink fur was to be seen.
The unicorn rushed to the tallest hill, about to magically enhance her sight to further the search, when she heard a quiet sob from the other side of the large oak tree that rested on the crest. There, oblivious to the world, was a pile of dim pink fur.
Pinkie was curled up, her face buried in her center and under her hooves. Her cries were dampened by the layers of limbs over top of her muzzle. There wasn’t any sign of the usual parchment that would cause the torrent of tears.
Seeing the distress up close caused a sliver of fear to run through the purple form. Twilight had to remind herself that she came to stop these sorts of outbursts and forced one hoof in front of the other. Not wanting to go overboard in her need for forgiveness, she stopped just beside the huddled mass.
“P… Pinkie Pie…?” Twilight kept her voice soft as she reached out. When the mass of half-poofy mane twitched back, the unicorn winced with one eye closed. “Please… I just… want to talk… I mean, really talk…” The mare looked up from under her bangs, tears starting to build once more.
The distressed earth pony rubbed at her eyes, though it didn’t manage to clear much from her eyes. “Tw-Twilight…?” Her crying slowed as she got a better look at the mare who haunted her every moment. Spotting that the unicorn looked much more rested, Pinkie sat up slightly. “You look better… Were you able to finally get some sleep?”
The librarian raised a single brow, curious, before her mind shouted that it didn’t matter how the other mare knew that. “Yes. And I had a talk with… with the princesses. And realized how I’ve been acting…”
Pinkie Pie sniffled slightly, breaking eye contact as her heart pinched. She scuffed a hoof on the ground right before her. “You… It wasn’t…”
“No. I know I was acting and behaving badly. And… it’s been very hurtful to you.” Twilight shook her head with a grim frown. She ducked her head to the left. “And I’m really sorry. Please don’t cry.”
The pink mare shook her head, biting her lip. “I’m not crying about… about that…”
“You’re not…?” The unicorn frowned concerned before sighing sadly. “But you’ve cried before about it.”
The baker didn’t refute the statement. Instead, she reached blindly for what had been causing her sobs before. “I… I know you said you wanted to be friends- or at least work on it.” Pinkie cut herself off when she saw the unicorn look up. “But I… I can’t help how I feel about you T-... Twilight. I wrote to my family, asking about their advice.”
Twilight sat down, inching a little closer to the earth mare. “What… what did they say? Because I’ve been… very horrible to you…” She closed her eyes, wanting to explain in a rush. “I only said we could be friends so I could watch and observe you, trying to prove that you still weren’t better and that I was right.”
Pinkie, her gaze on the letter, rested her head back on her hooves. “I know.”
“You knew…!?” The librarian whispered ashamed. Her cheeks flushed as even more pieces of understanding fell into place.
“I knew… I always know when you’re about.” The young baker closed her eyes, listening to her heart race inside her chest. “I… It’s part of my Pinkie Sense… And even though I… I doubted my Sense, it still worked just like always…”
Twilight shifted closer, pausing just shy of touching the dimly colored fur. “You doubted your own Sense? How… W-why…?”
In response to the question, the pink earth pony pushed her letter before the other mare. Her heart kept up its marathon while her hooftips tingled, sending the center of her body skyrocketing into the air with hope. She clenched her hoof with tightly closed eyes, willing the hope away lest it destroy what little peace she had achieved.
“My family, well, some of them, have had their own kinds of Senses. And since… I wasn’t trusting mine, I asked them about previous Pie Senses… About special someponies.”
The unicorn glanced bewildered to the pink pony before looking over the letter. The style and wording was a little old fashion but the message was clear enough.
Pinkamena Diane Pie,
Thou shalt not doubt thine Senses. While our own senses are weaker, needing the aid of a more magically connected Choosing Stone, thine Senses are stronger, as strong as thine’s grandmother. Grandmother Pinkie has only had her Sense about her Special Somepony once, after she had already knew and loved your grandfather. While she mourned his passing, being with her true love helped her move forward, as thou must also move forward.
This mare may not be with you right now, but our family’s Senses are never wrong. Stay as strong as a rock, and thou shalt withstand any storm.
Thine father and mother,
Igneous Rock Pie and Cloudy Quartz
“What’s a Choosing Stone…?” Twilight went with the simplest question instead of the harder one that caused another split in her mind. One, the more logical side, argued there was no thing as ‘true love’ nor could it be predicted if there was such a thing. The other felt that she had to accept the earth pony’s words; having already seen the effects of doubting ‘Pinkie Sense’, as well as being comforted as to why she still needed the party pony in her life.
Pinkie’s ears flicked on their own while her inners clenched. “Some of my family don’t have a strong sense like me and my Granny. So we found a very special kind of rock that helps us connect with the magic of the world and find the one that would be our special somepony.” The earth pony stopped, paying close attention to what her body’s Sense was telling her. As each second passed, her stomach relaxed slightly as her hooves lit on fire, spreading a pleasant warmth up the limbs.
Twilight shook her head clear of the argument and leaned up against the trembling pink side. “I… don’t understand… but I’m willing to let it go. Does… Does that mean that you’ve gotten a Pinkie Sense about us being together?” The unicorn kept her eyes closed while relief flooded her veins. Her attempt at talking things over with the baker was going much better than she thought.
The earth pony stiffened slightly as dread filled her mind. Speaking slowly, she tried to gauge the other’s reaction. “Y-yes… When you first came to town, I had the Sense that you would be my very special special somepony…” She rushed on, noticing how the unicorn flinched away. She reached out, grabbing a hold of a purple hoof as she stared up to the purple eyes with tears forming in her own. “I didn’t start trying to date you right away! I knew we would have to be friends at least and you might not want to anyways so I just wanted to make everything the greatest ever for you and it was working and I thought you were happy and I was happy and it seemed like my Sense was right but then things got worse and we broke up and I thought that my Senses must have been wrong and even if you don’t want to get back together I could understand I just want you to be happy and I know you’re not and I don’t know why and I’m sorry and-”
The studious unicorn leaned back at the first few rushed words only to stop when the other pony continued in a very familiar style of ranting. She closed her eyes briefly, absorbing the words and accepting that her paranoia was trying to turn her away from potentially regaining happiness once more. Once her mind unraveled the ranting for what the frantic earth pony was trying to say, an old feeling built in the center of her chest, urging her to embrace the frantic pony. She waited a moment, to be sure of her feelings, and leaned forward, giving the pink mare a kiss on the forehead. She used her left hoof to half hold the now silent mare as she rested her muzzle along the pink neck.
“I understand… And the others were right… You have changed and are trying to not be as possessive.” Twilight spoke softly, reaching with her other hoof complete the hug as she felt the earth pony shiver with more tears landing on the purple back. “And now it’s my turn to not be as paranoid about every action and reason… You’re right. I haven’t been very happy. Because I didn’t have somepony there to always cheer me up.”
Pinkie continued to shudder, afraid to believe this wasn’t a dream and that her ears and senses were right. She slowly moved her own hooves to hold onto the unicorn, biting at her lip to prevent another outburst that could potentially cut off what the other mare had to say.
The librarian took heart from the return of the embrace and rushed on. “You’ve… You’ve always cheered me up and reminded me to get outside instead of drowning in my studies. Even… Even when I was following you, you made sure I had breaks from those extremely long walks you went on.”
The baker couldn’t help herself. She giggled, remembering those moments and how unaware her watcher had been of why she had stopped. Twilight smiled at the sound, growing braver with the sound.
“And even if your Pinkie Sense DIDN’T say we are supposed to be special someponies, I can’t think of anypony better to be with.” Twilight had to pause as the pink hooves wrapped around her barrel tightened while the other mare shook. She tightened her own side of the hug, moving her head to be within reach of an trembling pink ear. “I know I’ve been really horrible to you… Please let me make it up to you? As your special somepony?”
The last line was nearly a whisper, the wind louder. Tears flowed freely from the blue orbs as Pinkie nodded rapidly against the lavender fur. Twilight sighed in relief. She began to stroke the pink back, trying to soothe the distressed mare.
“Thank you… Please don’t cry Pinkie… Please don’t cry…”
“I’m just… so happy…!” The muttered response was almost lost in the purple shoulder but attentive ears managed to catch it. “You want to be with me, even though I made a mess of us being in Canterlot, and even if I do… do pointless pursuits that… nopony really cares about…?” Pinkie’s sobs grew stronger. “Nopony wants me to throw them parties anymore anyways!”
“What?! It’s not pointless, your parties are the best ever! They make every pony happy!” Twilight argued as she turned in place to bring their two bodies closer. “Who said that!?! I’ll prove them otherwise in a heartbeat!”
“F-Fluttershy!” Was the sobbed reply, throwing off the unicorn for a moment.
“What? Fluttershy? But she’d never say something like that. Is that why you were up here crying this time?!” Understanding started to bloom in the usually astute mare. She started to pepper tiny kisses along the pink muzzle and neck, trying to get her marefriend into a state that she could think a little clearer. It did stop most of the waterworks, except the party pony continued to shiver in the purple hooves. “There, a little calmer…?” Twilight smirked as she looked at the other mare.
“P… Please don’t stop…” Pinkie murmured, leaning forward a few inches. Her center had reached temperatures that she couldn’t feel any of her insides. They may have also started to do a conga dance of joy and worry. Her mind, previously filled with more negative thoughts, had slowly cleared away, leaving only a buzz of happiness in it’s place.
When Twilight complied with a half smile, the rest of the baker’s mind filled with warmth, a ghost of laughter, free and joyous, echoing there. Memories of brighter times, with her special somepony and her best friends, with townsfolk and family, burst through the previously constant haze of depression. With a bright flash, the pink mare’s colors returned in force, her mane and tail curling as the deep kiss continued. The two mares inched closer with every passing second, reveling in the feel of the other.
Finally, Twilight started to move back, with Pinkie Pie doing the same a half breath behind, though she moved faster. Her eyes were still closed with a heavy blush on her cheeks. Both swallowed as their hearts and bodies craved more of the long missing touch.
“Do you think parties and making others happy is still pointless?” The unicorn spoke gently, prepared to take more action if her mare still doubted herself. It wasn’t needed as the party mare shook her head with a tiny smile.
“No way! Everypony needs some happiness in their lives. And one of the best ways is having a super duper fun party for whatever they need!” Pinkie’s grin grew larger with every word. At the last second, her smile dropped away as she lunged forward to peck at the other’s muzzle. Leaning back once more, her cheeks were dark red against her fur. “And a good friend never gives up on their friends. I’ll… I’ll go and talk with Fluttershy.”
Twilight wore a goofy smirk at the touch that grew stern as she thought. “There has to be a reason for the change… What has Fluttershy done recently before she talked to you like that?”
Pinkie pulled at her bottom lip. “Weeeeellllll, she did go to some assertiveness seminar…”
“Then that’s where the problem might be coming from.” The librarian assured her marefriend, holding a single hoof. “Do… Do you want me to go with you to-to help?”
“No, it’s ok. I’ve… I’ve got you right here.” The earth mare tapped her chest with a hoof with a sheepish glance. “Can… Can I meet you back here after… afterwards…?”
“Of course.” The lavender unicorn smiled gently to the mare of her heart. She resettled in place to show how she wouldn’t be moving. “I’ll be right here waiting for you.”
“Heey! That’s my song line!” Pinkie Pie stuck her tongue out playfully before skipping down the hill, heart as light as her hooves. She hummed to herself with a tiny grin. “Whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for you…”
“‘Heh heh… But in the end, if I’m with you, I’ll take the chance…” Twilight murmured as she watched the other mare go. She laid down her head onto her two hooves, content smirk in place. With a single thought, she teleported over paper and a quill to write the princesses with.
Dear Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,
You were right.
Clouds had tried to take over the sky but failed. Even if there had been pouring rain, the librarian was determined to stay right by that tree. Her mind drifted freely, pleased and weightless finally. It was as a sudden extra warmth beside her that caused the lavender mare to look up, already guessing who was there.
“Welcome back, Pinkie Pie.” Twilight beamed up, waiting for the inevitable large embrace.
Instead, the earth pony hung back, scuffing a hoof on the ground. The top edge of her body swayed, wanting to be closer, but her hooves seemed stuck in place. Noticing the purple hoof patting the ground beside its owner, Pinkie allowed herself to fling forward, giving the unicorn a hug briefly and laying down beside her.
“I’m back…”
The studious unicorn leaned into the warm body with a large smile. “I’m glad you’re back… That you are willing to forgive me and take me back…”
“I’ll always be here for you Twilight-... my star…” Pinkie murmured the nickname softly, feeling a pang far in the corner of her mind. A loving kiss chased away the sting.
“I… I never thought I would hear that name again…” Twilight kept her voice low as the warmth lulled her into a cozy haze.
“I can call you that as many times as you want… my star… My lovely star, star of my heart, star of my sky…” Pinkie felt extra awake as she fought the dark voice saying it was all a dream.
She kept watch as her marefriend slept, memorizing each line, strand of fur, and movement of the unicorn. Her body released the tension as the afternoon wore on, growing accustomed to the happiness and warmth she felt coming from the unicorn, a marked difference from a few days earlier.
It was a wonderful sight for the usually hyper pony to see the love of her heart wake up beside her. She hadn’t known if she would be lucky enough to see it ever again. Even as she wanted to give the unicorn space, Pinkie couldn’t help but nose nuzzle her marefriend once she was more aware.
“Have a good nap my little star…? Do you think it’s about time for some dinner…?” The pink pony helped provide a stable shoulder as they stood up.
“Would… Would you like to come by my house and… we could cook up something?” Twilight’s mind scrambled to plan rapidly. Seeing the agreeing nod, she lead the way back to the local library.
The duo trotted into the large tree house slowly, adjusting to the feel of the other beside them. Twilight blushed when she saw that she hadn’t put any of the ‘observation notes’ away from the previous night. Using a rapid spell, she sent it on downstairs. Pinkie, knowing exactly what they were based on how it looked and being left out overnight, hunched down with flat ears. The feeling of a loving nuzzle along her maneline brought her out of her worries.
“I wanted to fix… ‘this’... as soon as I could, so I hadn’t thrown the papers away, that’s all.” Twilight smiled when she saw that her words helped.
Before either could say much more, there was a happy yelp from the stairway. Looking over, the two mares were quickly engulfed in a tight hug by sharp claws that tried to not prick on their fur.
“Please say you two made up…” Spike whispered with tightly shut eyes.
The earth pony bit her lip happily as she put out a hoof to hold him back. “You bet little buddy.”
Twilight wore a bright grin and clasped the lad happily. “Yes, and I’m very happy we did. We were about to cook dinner, want to help?”
“You bet!” The dragon let go gruffy, a blush staining his cheeks.
Together, the three went for the cozy kitchen and started a simple meal. The atmosphere was full of jokes, joy, and delicious smells. With the baker present, they made prench toast and waffles. Sitting around the little table, it felt like they were a family. Natural. The two mares saw the lad to bed, promising no more crazy things, for the next two days at least. When Spike frowned, confused and concerned, Pinkie merely shrugged.
“You never know in Ponyville!”
Twilight couldn’t fault the logic and nodded solemnly. Once the drake was safely in his room, the unicorn looked towards the earth pony who was already heading downstairs, though she stopped when she noticed the purple gaze on her.
“It’s everypony’s bed time my star. You still have a looooooot of sleep to get back.” Pinkie returned to the librarian’s side, rubbing her muzzle along the purple one.
“I… guess so… I’ll… walk you to the door.” Twilight tried to keep the disappointment from influencing her actions and led the way to the front.
Their steps were both familiar and yet hesitant. Pressed up against one another, they knew the situation was ok, and yet, things weren’t quite like it was before. When they reached the exit, both went still, trying to extend their time together.
“I’ll… see you tomorrow, right, my star…?”
“Yes. And as many mornings as you want.”
“Then I won’t need to say goodbye…” Pinkie pressed up her body against the other mare’s. “Just… ‘goodnight’. Goodnight my little star.”
“Goodnight, my sweartheart…” Twilight’s words drifted off as she moved in for one last kiss of the night. The touch was short but full of meaning.
While the earth pony walked back to the bakery, she kept looking over her shoulder, unsure if the image of her unicorn bathed in candlelight would still be there. The unicorn didn’t move from her vigil in the doorway. She watched, making sure to savor each line of the mare she almost lost due to her foolishness. That night, she made a promise. To always forgive, and always learn from her mistakes.