Playin' the Golden Record

by Ponycrafter


Viva Las Pegasus

The rest of the flight was somewhat uneventful. They met a griffin, who exchanged some bits for somewhere to catch his breath, but that was about it. The ponies had been flying for a whole day straight, and Yugo was showing no signs of exhaustion. The ponies found themselves getting increasingly bored, and not even Pinkie Pie's games could help pass the time. It was now night time, but the ponies couldn't sleep well with turbulence shaking them from their beds. They still hadn't had anything fun to do when Yugo made a strange sound.

Fnyyuuurrrrrrr!

The group, sans Spike who was in the bathroom, turned their heads and glanced forward at Yugo. He pointed with his hoof to the horizon. The looks on the group's faces instantly lightened as they saw bright, flashing lights and spotlights blazing through the air.

They had reached Las Pegasus!

"YEEEHAW!" Applejack cheered. The rest of the ponies quickly followed suit.

"Ooh! We're here!" Pinkie exclaimed. "We'reherewe'rehere!"

"Oh, those lights are so marvelous..." Rarity stared in awe at the beautiful lights that shone in the distance.

"Yay..." Fluttershy cheered at the amazing sight.

"Aww yeah!" Rainbow yelled. "I can't wait to cut some air through this place!"

"Wow, it's even bigger than the books said!" Twilight used her photography spell to permanently engrave the image in her memory.

The ponies were about to stick their heads out of the carriage to get a better look when a loud roar was heard from Yugo. Another roar promptly followed from behind them. Turning around and peering through the small rear window, Pinkie Pie caught the silhouette of a large dragon speeding towards them. Involuntarily her ears began flopping, her left rear leg began tapping and her tail began twitching.

"DRAGON!" She shouted.

The crew burst into action, diving under the table. Rarity instead ran for the master bedroom. They had all heard stories about the bandit dragons who ransacked unlucky carriages at night. Images of their dooms flashed through their minds. Yugo let out another roar, this time higher pitched.

The rapidly approaching dragon returned it, before soaring feet away from the carriage and dipping out of sight. When Rainbow Dash saw that the dragon had disappeared, she climbed out from the table.

"Peh, dragons. I ain't afraid of no-"

"Excuse me?" A booming voice said. Rainbow whipped around to stare directly into the face of a huge, black dragon. He soared alongside the carriage, his yellow eyes surveyed inside of the carriage. Yugo's green eyes turned a bright red as the dragon eyed Fluttershy.

"... I'm not going to eat her," The dragon said. "I'm a guardsdragon. I just came to make sure you aren't a threat."

Yugo's spectral horn glowed brightly, and that's when the ponies got a good look at the dragon. His scaled weren't black, but in fact a deep shade of green. He wore a large chestplate and helmet, both colored to match his scales. A shining metal "G" emblazoned itself on the dragon's chestplate and helmet. His left wing was replaced by a metallic, bladed one, similar to Yugo's wings.

Fluttershy was the first to act. she crawled out from under the table, followed swiftly by the other ponies. She showed no signs of fear as she eyed the dragon. The ponies were surprised to meet a friendly dragon. Spike gazed in awe at the dragon.

"Is that what I'm gonna look like when I grow up?" He asked.

"Yes, little one," The guard said. "I looked much like you when I was young, except I was green." The guard smiled slightly before continuing. "And I had wings."

The ponies giggled quietly. Yugo's light went out for a brief moment as his eyes shaded back to green.

"Now, to business," The guard grumbled. "I'm going to ask you a few questions."

Twilight stepped forward. "Ask away, sir."

"Do you have any fugitives on board?"

"No."

"Is there anybody onboard that is not present at the moment?"

"Yes, Rarity, but she's just a unicorn like me."

"Are you transporting explosives or toxic goods?"

"Nuh-uh."

"Last question," The guard said. "Why is Yugo pulling your carriage instead of royal guards?"

This question caught Twilight by the horn. "What? You know Yugo?"

"Yes, he is Golden Record's companion."

Twilight nodded, as if she were understanding, but truly she didn't know. Rainbow Dash shifted uneasily on her hooves, growing frustrated.

"Well, you don't seem to pose any threat," The guard said, unhappy he wasn't able to blaze another terrorist out of the sky. He turned his head to Yugo. "Follow me and I'll guide you to Neighon Hotel. Golden Record has informed me of your arrival."

Yugo nodded, tilting left as the guard did. He soared quickly behind the dragon. The ponies allowed themselves to relax and look out the window. Rarity emerged from the bedroom and joined the girls wordlessly.

"So, he was friendly, I take it?" She said.

"Eeyup," Applejack replied.

The group opened the carriage door and crowded carefully onto the outside of the huge carriage. They peeked over the railing and stared out the glorious sight. Beneath them was fabulous Las Pegasus. The gang oohed and awed as they saw fireworks going off in the distance. Strange sirens filled the air as a pair of pegasus guards chased down a speeding carriage. The city was alive with movement, but what really got their eyes was the gargantuan building that loomed in the distance. Some of the windows were lit, others were not. A large, well-lit sign perched on the side of the building - "Neighon Casino and Hotel".

"Is that where we're staying?!" Pinkie Pie shouted. She leaned too far over the edge, however, and the other she screamed loudly as she tumbled over the side. The other girls and Spike yelled after her.

"PINKIE!"

But just as they thought she was a goner, Yugo's wing tentacle dodged out and snatched her by the hind leg. A chorus of "phew" was heard as Yugo flipped Pinkie into his hooves, hugging her tightly.

"Aww, thanks, Yoogie!" Pinkie said. "I thought I was done for! You can hug me anywhere you want, by th- Eep!"

Pinkie reached down and yanked Yugo's wing tentacle from inside her marehood. Yugo's eyes shifted to a blue color as he looked at her, as if saying "why?".

"Not there, Yoogie." Pinkie said in her usual cheery manner.

Aaawwwwwww... Yugo hung his head low as his cartoonish heart cracked in half.

The group exchanged glances before bursting into a fit of laughter. Yugo joined in shortly after. The laugh was cut short as Yugo ushered the ponies inside before slowing down to land on top of Neighon. The landing was rather rough as Yugo wasn't quite used to landing vertically. After touchdown, the ponies grabbed their bags and trotted off the carriage. Spike, as usual, rode on Twilight's back. On top of what looked to be a huge bird perch sat the same dragon guard, although his helmet was now held in his left claw. The group got a good look at his razor-sharp head spikes. Wind ruffled them slightly. Twilight wondered why no wind was hitting her or her friends.

"Welcome to the Neighon Casino and Hotel!" He said as he nudged open the roof door with his claw. The ponies thanked Yugo for the ride, and Fluttershy even kissed him on the snout again. His heart melted once again. He handed Fluttershy a card before she left to join the other ponies who were waiting for her. Yugo's horn glowed brightly, and a cyan forcefield formed and dissipated from around the ponies. Wind quickly battered the mares, and Spike was almost blown off of Twilight's back.

"That must've been Yugo's air forcefield," Twilight yelled over the loud whooshing. "Everypony inside!"

The girls quickly obeyed, especially Rarity who bolted for the door.

"Oh dear, my mane will be ruined!"

Applejack's hat also blew off of her head, and despite her efforts to catch it, it blew away in the wind.

"Mah hat!" She cried as it whipped wildly in the highrise wind. The dragon guard reached out effortlessly and snatched the hat from the air, much to Applejack's approval. "Thanks."

"No problemo," The guardsdragon replied. "Happens all the time."


Twilight stood at the counter of the hotel's check-in booth. She had rang the bell three times, and still no clerk appeared. Twilight's friends chatted and relaxed in the lounge, finding a large comfy couch to sit on next to en elegant fireplace. A tiny but adult dragon tended the fire from the inside, stepping into the flames easily and without pain, moving logs and blowing flames on any unlit ones. Twilight saw the crew burst into laughter as Spike told them an inaudible story. Twilight's thoughts were interrupted at an accented voice.

"May I serve you?"

Twilight turned around and faced a male griffon, dressed in a great-looking tuxedo. She had to get used to seeing all kinds of Equestrian races in Las Pegasus as it was such a great vacation spot. He sat behind a large red book with a quill at the ready. His headfeathers were well combed, and the majority of his feathers were a deep brown except for his head, which was a dark gray. He opened the book as Twilight looked him in the eye.

"Yes, we're checking in," Twilight said. "My last name's Sparkle."

The griffin's eyes darted across multiple pages as he flipped through them quickly. He found the S's, and started going through last names. Stargazer, Stormchaser, Spindle, Shooter... Aha! Sparkle!

"Are you Twilight Sparkle or Shining Sparkle?" He asked.

"Twilight."

"Good. I see you have a reservation for seven in the penthouse," He said, scratching out Twilight's name in the book. "Welcome to the Neighon Casino and Hotel. I am Bildar."

"Nice to meet you, Bildar." Twilight held out her hoof, and Bildar shook it kindly.

"May I show you to your room?" Bildar asked.

"That would be lovely," Twilight said. "Let me get my friends."


Pinkie Pie bounced happily next to Bildar, happily holding a key in her mouth. She had insisted that she carry the key to the room. Bildar had hesitated at first, but let her hold it for now. She hopped into the elevator, and was quickly joined by her friends and Bildar. The griffon pressed a button on the wall, labeled "P", and the elevator jolted into motion. The gang was surprised to find that the walls of the elevator were glass, and they passed multiple floors, each different from the others. On floors four to seven, the casino sat. Ponies, griffons, dragons and even a diamond dog played various games throughout the giant room. They next passed the pool, where folks of all races were swimming happily. A large, red dragon was sprawled out on the floor with four female dragon masseuses surrounding him, massaging various parts of his body. Fluttershy and Rarity chittered excitedly when they saw the sauna and spa nearby. Next were the strangely large rooms that housed dragons of all sizes. They were much bigger than the pony or griffin rooms. They passed more pools, game rooms, another casino and a wonderful ballroom. In the ballroom, a pair of newlywed ponies danced slowly to elegant music.When the elevator jolted to a halt, Bildar raised his voice to be heard over the elevator's loud humming motor.

"Here we are, the penthouse!" He said. "Watch your step on the way out, please."

The ponies stepped into a tiny, bland room with only a few chairs, a window and a door.

"Excuse me," Rainbow Dash said, "What the buck is this?"

"The entryway." Bilder chuckled as Pinkie handed him the key to the door. He pushed it in and turned it (Giggity), and a quiet click was heard as the door drifted open slowly. Like the chariot, the door moved without a sound. Bildar flicked on the light switch, and the ponies stared in awe at the sight before them.

At first, they thought they had entered the royal chambers of Princess Celestia. Golden chandeliers hung from the ceiling, and a marvelous table occupied the center of the room.

On one end of the room, a 120" flatscreen television hung on the wall, and under it sat a collection of movies, remoted and a Ponystation 3. The television set was complete with matching surround sound speakers that circled a set of jet-black fuzzy chairs. A coffee table sat between two enormous couches, holding the master television remote and four Ponystation 3 controllers. Rainbow Dash and Applejack practically drooled their way over, plonking themselves on the couches.

Opposite the entertainment corner was a large kitchen. It was complete with ovens, microwaves, sinks, and everything else a pony/griffon/dragon would need to cook anything they wanted. Pinkie Pie squealed with delight when she opened one of the cupboards nearby, revealing an entire stash of baking goodies. Rarity admired the kitchen too, as a pristine tile floor and mahogany wood furnishings decorated every inch of it. She even found a bowl of gems, ready for anydragon to eat should they desire a special snack. What truly made this kitchen amazing, though, was the button that Pinkie Pie curiously pressed. Seemingly out of nowhere, a somewhat pony-like robot stepped out from a trapdoor in the wall and into Pinkie Pie's view.

It had a strange look to it. It was equine in form. It had shiny, white metal plating covering it and a finely combed mane made out of magnetic beads. In place of eyes was a camera. It had wires exposed all over its body. Twilight thought it unsafe, but Pinkie paid no heed.

"Hello," The metallic pony said in a male voice resembling a Canterlot accent. "I am Automated Kitchen and Oven Stove System. But you may call me AKOSS, Ms. Pie."

Pinkie squealed again, this time her tail swishing to add to the emphasis.

"He knows my name! Heehee!"

"Of course I do, Ms. Pie. Princess Celestial Sun, known to you as Celestia, programmed me to recognize anypony who enters the kitchen. I am currently unable to recognize dragons or griffons, however."

Pinkie Pie pulled AKOSS into a tight hug. AKOSS didn't know how to respond, so it just stood there while it was being practically crushed by Pinkie's iron grip.

Finally, there was the bedroom. To Twilight's surprise, there were only three beds. Two ponies would have to share each one, but she found that sleeping with another pony wasn't so bad when you had a giant, king-sized bed with silk covers to sleep on. Fluttershy flopped down on one, and literally fell asleep right away. Twilight followed her lead. It had been a long trip, and she wouldn't mind a small snooze. She slapped down next to Fluttershy and dozed off without hesitation.

Meanwhile, Bildar stood ready at the door, waiting. After seeing that he wouldn't be noticed any time soon, he sighed and sat down in a nearby chair, eyeing a small golden statue that stood on the table in front of him. The statue resembled a pony kneeling down, grasping a sword with its mouth and wearing a strange hat and robes. Engraved into the front of the statue's base was the word "Stephano". Whatever that meant.

After a few minutes of admiring the statue, Spike padded over, dragging a bag twice the size of himself, filled to the brim with bits.

"Okay, here's 40,000 bits," Spike said. "That should cover it!"

Bildar hoisted the bag over his shoulder, its weight tipping him backwards and forcing him to go bipedal. Thankfully he had trained on how to walk like this. He thanked Spike and walked out the door, nearly hitting his head on the way out. The door shut behind him, and seconds later Spike heard the sound of the elevator's motor starting up again.

Spike looked at the statue that Bildar was admiring. He picked it up and studied its features, paying close attention to the details put into the pony's robes and hat. The curved sword in the pony's mouth was pointed towards the ground, as it saluting something.

"Stephano, eh?" Spike said as he flipped the statue over, looking at the bottom. It had a little phrase engraved into it. It was hard on his eyes, but he managed to read it.

To do:

Find Piggeh and Mr. Chair
Don't trust statues
Hate barrels
Run from bro
Be wary of teleporting naked guys

"Hello Pewdie!" A mysterious voice with a strange accent emanated from the statue. Spike yelped and dropped it, rubbing his eyes in case he had dreamt it. As he hoped, it was only his imagination. His lack of sleep must have been getting to him. For some reason, he wanted to take... Stephano... to bed with him. He felt safer with it. He picked the golden statue up and headed for the bedroom. He walked past the baking Pinkie Pie and AKOSS. He walked past the gaming Applejack and Rainbow, who were busy blasting each other in Call of Duty: Equestrian Conflict. He walked past a suit of Canterlot Knight's armor. Suddenly, Spike remembered the message on the bottom of Stephano:

Don't trust statues

Spike turned to glare at the suit of armor. He swore it had changed position. Spike turned to walk away again, but whipped back when he heard metal creaking. This time, the armor's helmet was turned towards him slightly. Spike walked back over and studied the armor, expecting it to move. After staring at it for a few minutes with sleepy eyes, he threw Stephano at the armor's helmet.

Clang!

The helmet clanked to the floor of the penthouse, a large dent implanted in the side. Stephano bounced back into Spike's hand, unharmed, and Spike caught Stephano with ease.

"I don't trust you..." Spike mumbled tiredly as he padded off to bed, bringing Stephano with him.