203 years before…

Donut Joe walked the streets of New Pittsburgh. It was his hometown. His parents had moved there when he was a colt, and he grew up rooting for the New Steelers football team with his friends. Had his first girlfriend (a cute filly by the name of Bon Bon). He only moved out of necessity.

His Donut shop was doing well in Canterlot, and he knew he was wanting to extend his business elsewhere. What better place than his old neighborhood? He was dressed in a leather jacket as he made his way down the streets. His parents, God bless their souls, had died the previous year. It was hard looking at the apartment he grew up in, but as he saw children playing outside, he couldn’t help but smile.

A young gray Pegasus hybrid filly walked up to him, wearing coveralls and violet mane couldn’t be more than five years old as she looked up at him.

“Your th’ baker who wants ta make the donutty shop ‘round th’ corner, right?” She managed to speak with a missing front tooth.

Joe smiled and patted the girl on the head. “Yeah. And who told ya that, kiddo?”

“My momma. She said that once it opened, that we can eat th’ best donuts in ‘Questria!” She chirped as her smile spread over her face.

He couldn’t keep his grin this wide forever, but the way the kid looked at him, he couldn’t help but keep his smile on. “Well, if you come by, you and yer mom can have a donut on me when I open.”

The filly tilted her head as she looked at him, confused. “Why would I want to eat a donut off of you?”

Joe couldn’t help but let out a loud chuckle. “I meant it would be free, kiddo.”

“Then why didn’t you say so?” The kid’s smile returned as she ran off towards a human woman sitting on the stairs, wearing a gray dress and blouse. “MOMMA! WE’RE GETTIN’ FREE DONUTS!”

Joe shook his head as he began to walk to the shop. He noticed that a few humans who were on the street where giving him stares. He didn’t know, exactly, what caused it, till he saw a human boy, about ten years old wearing a white checkered shirt, selling newspapers.

“EXTRA, EXTRA! PURE-BLOOD ATTACKS IN PONYVILLE! TWO KILLED AS ANTI-HUMAN MOB ATTACKS CHURCH!” The boy hardly stopped as he looked at Joe, handing him a newspaper. Joe almost instinctively tossed two bits to the boy, who nodded his thanks to the unicorn, as he began reading the story.

“As mass was being held at the newly made Church of the Abbey of the Road, a small group of Pure-Blood members threw rocks through the window. As members of the congregation gathered together for protection, the assistant Deacon, Marcus Tennant and his brother, Nigel, went to the door to barricade it, only to be met with two members of the mob. The two were dragged out of the church and beaten and trampled. The group continued unabated for… thirty minutes… till they were chased off by a mixture of police and townsponies. The two humans were taken to the Ponyville General Hospital. Nigel Tennant was declared dead on arrival, while Marcus died shortly after surgery. Several critics of the Church stated that the attacks wouldn’t happen if they would be more open to revealing the location of the Abbey to Princess Celestia. Spokesmen from the Church replied “When the smaller towns of Equestria can care for the lives of the people and ponies of their faith, then the Church will be more than willing to reveal the location to the Royal Sisters” stating that “Lives should matter more than theological and political power plays”.

Poor response time from the Police guard were attributed with zoning restrictions imposed by Mayor Mare on the Church, forcing them to build near the outskirts of the town. In light of such a tragedy, the Mayor pulled back on her restrictions, and had set into motion the rebuilding and/or moving of the Church closer to Ponyville proper. Pure-Blood sentiment in Ponyville had dropped sharply after the near fatal attack on famed musician Lyra Heartstrings and her fiancé, Thomas Morgan by the local group’s leader, Red Rum, but the lack of arrests from the police on either the most recent case and the previous one has shown a lack of faith in the local government.”

He couldn’t read any more. Joe held onto the paper, but tore out the offending headline as he continued on. Pure-Bloods weren’t new. They had existed since ponies knew that other species could speak and think like they could. They put an emphasis on keeping “Pony Blood clean”, weather that meant encouraging same-tribe marriages, or putting more emphasis on “Old time herding”, a practice made popular in the time where the gender ratios where skewed to two stallions for every five mares (Because of modern medicine, the ratio had come to a comfortable 1.5 stallions for every two mares) where several mares shared one stallion.

They viewed humanities involvement on changing certain behaviors (namely the so called “Herd Mentality” when they assisted in equaling out the gender ratio ) as evil, and that all humans could never truly be Equestrian citizens.

Joe wanted nothing to do with them, and could feel the unease that several humans would have with him around. A face that hadn’t been seen for years, and who had yet to get into contact with his old friends made such things difficult.

He turned the corner, putting his paper to his pocket as he noticed a small group of humans and ponies standing outside his future bakery. At first, he worried, keeping himself to the side, till he recognized one of the people in the crowd.

“Is that you, Speedy?” Joe asked as he looked at a young dark skinned man in his mid twenties wearing a white greaser shirt and jeans.

“Dough Boy?” Speedy said as he parted from the group, walking over to Joe who got onto his hind legs to hug him with his forelegs tightly. “Damn, man! It’s been too long!” They stopped hugging as Joe went back to all fours, smiling.

Speedy was quick to the draw with a bit of the gossip he had heard. “I heard that you got a pretty sweet deal in Canterlot after that cooking school. Serve the princess’ any of your cream filled long johns yet?” Speedy joked, his elbow ribbing into Joe’s side.

“Yeah, but not in the way you mean, man. Princess Luna likes the Bavarian creams. Who’d knew.”

Speedy looked at Joe like he grew a second head. “You serve the Princess’? For real?”

“Yeah… not as much as I’d like.” He smiled as he looked up at Speedy. “But I am pretty tight with the assistant to Princess Twilight.”

“You’re shitting me.” Speedy’s mouth keep open as he looked at him.

“I shit you not, good sir. He’s a fan of the fritters, by the way.”

“Fucking hell!” Speedy knelt down and hugged Joe with one arm as he laughed. “Man, am I proud of you! I knew your stuff was good, just didn’t know it was THAT good!”

Joe grinned as he stopped and sat down, looking up at Speedy. “So, what brings you and your friends here? Where’s the rest of the gang?”

“Some guy is building a bakery here. Word on the street he’s a real douche bag.” Speedy’s grin couldn’t hide the pride he felt then and there for his friend. “The Twins are working at the steel mill, like their dad. Tipper is working at the Journal as a reporter. And Jenny got married.” The look on Speedy’s face made it seem like he was hiding something, but Joe decided not to follow with it, just in case it was a sore subject.

“It’s good to hear that they’re all still on their hooves. By the way, I’m the douche bag who’s opening the bakery.” Joe knew how to play along with Speedy’s jokes. “What are you doing, anyways?”

“Mailman, actually worked with a Miss Ditzy Hooves before she became Equestria’s favorite goofball.” Speedy smiled down at Joe. “And I do mean “worked”.”

Joe couldn’t help but let out a loud guffaw as he shook his head. “You horny bastard. When are you ever going to settle down, man?”

“Who said I’m not settled down? Got me a wife and two kids now.” Speedy said, in a haughty fashion. “And no, I didn’t even date her when I was seeing Ditzy, and yes, the kids are from her, you nut sprain.”

Joe blinked in surprise as he looked at Speedy. “Wow… that’s… kind of a big deal.”

“Said the famous donut master.” Speedy mused.

“Man… I’ve been so busy with the business, I’ve… I’ve only been on, like… three dates…”

“In, what… the last month?”

Joe shook his head.

“Three months?”

He continued to shake his head.

“… Year?”

“Three years…. “

It was now Speedy’s turn to drop his jaw as he gasped at empty space. After a few seconds, he recovers and looks down, apologetically at his friend. “Dude… You better be careful when you sit your ass down, I don’t want to hear your poor aching balls explode when I’m on the other side of N.P., hear me?”

“I’ve been sitting pretty well recently, Speedy. Don’t worry. I’ll be out on the prowl soon after I open my shop up, anyways… Also, who is the lucky lady? And should I tell her what kind of things you where into in high school? Like that “experiment”?” Joe joked as the two got to the door of his work in progress.

“Funny thing is… it’s Jenny, so she knows first hand what kind of a dick I am. Still figuring out how she puts up with me.”

Joe couldn’t help but smile. Jenny was a Pegasus hybrid that Joe had known for years. She was his bully in grade school, and close buddy in high school. He could see her being the pants in any relationship, but thinking of her as a mother was a slight stretch.

The two entered the still blank Donut Shop as they continued their conversation, Speedy sitting in a chair as Joe went and made some coffee.

“So… you read the story?” Speedy’s voice turned to a more serious tone.

“Yeah… I’ve been to Ponyville, too. The ponies there aren’t bigots. Most of them, I mean. You’ve got a few jackasses everywhere, but Ponyville is just filled with crazy, not hateful, folks.” Joe sighed as he looked at the coffee pot. “I remember Pinkie Pie talking about two folks from her church. Brothers. If it’s the same pair from the story, then… Ponyville just lost two of the best blacksmiths that side of Canterlot.”

Speedy simply gave a grunt in approval as Joe levitated a cup of coffee over to him.

“I’m guessing that things are getting rough here in New Pit.”

Speedy looked up at Joe, a look of worry on his face as he took the cup. “It’s that obvious? Damn, I need to work on that.”

“What’s going on, Speedy.”

Speedy took a long drink from his cup as he collected his thoughts. “Pure Bloods have been moving in. Wouldn’t be that big of a problem if it wasn’t for the police.” He put the cup on the table, his gaze set on the table. “New Pittsburgh was a human colony-city, sure, but we fought to be a part of Equestria and this Earth. These guys… they are trying to take control of City Hall, the Steel Mill… it’s getting to be that we can’t trust anypony who moves in from out of the city, unless they got ties to the city. If this keeps up, we’ll be no better than the Pure Bloods. The Police have been knuckling down on both sides, which is a mixed blessing, to be sure.”

Joe stared at Speedy, his brow furrowed as he tried to ask for more information. The shock, however, was too much for him.

“No one’s died, thank God, but… what would happen if the Pure Bloods… or a crazy pro-human… got into power in the police station?” Speedy groaned to himself as he rubbed his forehead with both hands.

“How long has it been like this?” Joe finally managed to ask, a crack in his voice from the sudden fear weighing on him.

“Apparently, our parents have had to deal with this. Just now, the problems a lot more vocal.” Speedy finished his cup and looked at his watch. “Shit… Joe, dude, I got to bail.”

“No problem, Speedy. Go on.”

Speedy shot out of his chair and almost sprinted to the door before he stopped, and turned to Joe. “Saturday, you are going to eat at our place. No arguments, Joe Dirt.”

“First off, I don’t know where you live…”

“Same apartment. Parents gave it to me when they decided to move to Appleloosa. For a frontier town, it’s pretty cushy.”

“Alright, but still… Stop calling me Joe Dirt. I spend my whole High School era having to fight that damn nickname, I don’t need it to come back and bite me on the ass.”

“No promise…” And with that, Joe was alone with his thoughts.

Thinking of all the things going on in his home city, of the corruption and double dealings, could only be smothered by two things.

The first was that his parents had been through these very problems. He knew his mother and father raised him right. He’d live through it.

The second was that he wasn’t going through this alone. He had friends. And he knew that they could get through it all together.

/////////////////////////////////

Present day…

“You push me till I break and the anger turns to rage.

Why can’t you just leave me alone?

Your finger’s on the trigger

You think that you’re the winner

but your gonna get kicked offa your throne…”

Can’t tell why, but I can’t get that song out of my head. I doubt that Discord has any control over that. Hope it stays that way. I really don’t want to know what his taste in music is.

“Classical Rap.”

Huh… don’t know what that is, but doesn’t sound bad… And please stop doing that.

“Can’t help it.” Discord said with a slight chuckle. I need to make sure he doesn’t get too into my thoughts. I continue singing the song, both out loud and in my head.

“Tonight, get ready for a fight…”

“SHUT UP IN THERE, PINK MEAT!”

Oh, is that Mr. Happy? The guy who dragged me in here and told me to eat crap?

“TONIGHT, GET READY FOR A FIGHT, SO NOW YOU KNOW ITS TIME TO RIDE THIS CIRCUS FOR A PSYCHO!”

I heard pounding from the other side of the door. “I said shut your trap, you Pink Meat Sleave! If I have to open this door, you won’t be walking out of it! Your lucky you ain’t dead after the shit stunt you pulled on Monty and Rondo!”

Oh, oh! The two who probably got blown up? Oh, good…

I shook my head. I don’t need to think like them. Sure, they are scummy Raiders who want to kill me, or worse, but I don’t need to bow down to their level. If they die, they die, but I sholdn’t be glad that they die.

I heard applause for a few seconds as Discord clapped two disembodied hands below his head. “Well said, boy.”

Thank you, voice inside my head.

I need to get out of here. Weather I get saved by the others or not, I am not staying here longer than I need to. And considering I may have killed two… maybe injured others (I hope so, the fewer able bodied ponies, the better) it’ll be easier for me now, before they regroup.

I poured the water into the pee bucket slowly, trying to make it sound as authentically urinatingly as possible. (Shush. I know urinatingly isn’t a real word yet, but if we sweep that tiny fact under the rug, it might, someday, end up in Websters Dictionary.) Phase one of plan complete.

Phase two. Enrage the giant one eyed monster.

I wished I could have went through my life never having to say that, but hell, might as well enjoy the absurdity of it all.

“HEY, ONE EYED WILLY!” I yelled as loud as I could. “GET ME OUT OF HERE! THERE’S A RADROACH IN HERE!” I began to stomp on the ground, making it sound like I was fighting some large insect, or at least what I would think sounded like a fight against a large insect. As I heard the hoof steps, I got into position, picking up the bucket as quietly as possible.

“You better be dying in there, Pink Mea-“ He opened the door quickly, and in reflex, I threw the water at him. His brick red coat seemed to glow even redder. “OH, GODDESSES! IT’S IN MY EYE SOCKET!” Water dripped into his mouth, making him gag.

I smiled at him as I laughed. The fat head glared at me and backed away, still facing me.

“You are going to be paste!”

“Heaven or Hell! FIGHT!” I don’t know WHERE that came from, but apparently I was the only one to hear it. And frankly, it just put fuel in the dwindling fire that was once my hope of winning this fight. As One Eye lunged at me, I slammed the bucket over his head and managed to redirect the force from his head but into the wall. I ran to the metal door and closed it. Luckily, the key for the door was in the lock. So, what do I do?

“You broke the key in the lock.”

I broke the key in the lock! Wait, was that you Discord?

Discord’s head peeked from the side of my vision as he wore a metal workers mask. “Sorry, wasn’t paying attention. I’m trying to work on something in the background. Could you come back later?”

Oh, okay… well, if that wasn’t you, then…

I looked around the room, an apartments living room, and noticed a handful of Night Stallions looking at me.

I smiled sheepishly before I heard, and felt the metal door thump a few times before a hoof burst through it, leaving a big hole in it. “I AM GOING TO SKULL FU-”

“Hold onto that thought.” I raised my index finger as I turned to the others, who were still not aiming their guns at me and confused. They were only in one of the doors out of the room, the other being a giant hole leading to another apartment, and a fire escape in questionable condition. Good enough for me. “Onetwothree YOUR IT!” I ran to the fire escape and sort of crawl jumped out. The alleyway was empty, save for a dumpster and a recently dead stallion.

“Oh, yeah, no big deal. Just another dead body!” I muttered to myself as I went to the ladder and tried to go down it as quickly as possible.

Wait, is that ladder made for humans?

“MEAT SLEEVE!”

Later! Got to run away from Red Hulk Rapist in pony form.

I slid down the rest of the way and realized something.

“Ow!”

I just twisted my ankle. That is going to make the rest of this plan suck. Not impossible, just suck.

I went to the body and looked on it’s person, and found a switch blade.

In his throat.

Which was now in the early stages of decomposition.

“Noooope…” I left the blade where it was, but did find, of all things, healing powder and med-x in his pocket. I had about just under half of my hp. (Handy to know how close you are to being killed, but I don’t exactly know how it’s measured. I suppose I had plenty of internal injuries. Maybe the burn?

Wait a second…

“OOoooooowwww!” I muttered to myself as I waved my burnt and now slightly bleeding forearms around. I took the medicine and limped down the alleyway till I found another dumpster. I climbed into it, and caught my breath.

Okay, decision time. What do I use the healing powder on, and what do I use the Med-x on? Well, I could use the healing powder on my arms so I can fight, and use the Med-x on my ankle. No, need the speed more than the fight.

I quickly jabbed my burns, giving each arm half a dose of Med-X, then applied the healing powder. It didn’t take long for my ankle to heal, but my forearms where now only a little less pained as I relaxed.

I was about to get out of the dumpster when I heard a set of hooves running down the alley towards me.

“You see him?”

“Nah. He must have flown away.”

“Idiot! Humans don’t fly!”

“Yeah? What about that comic you got? La Fantome?”

“She’s different.” The Night Stallion stammered as he walked away. “B-besides, that’s just stories. Humans can’t use magic or have wings, so they can’t fly.”

Oh, how I wished I could fly out of here now. Granted, I’d still have one Pegasus to worry about, but hell, that’s better than it was. I couldn’t help but smile as I thought of neutralizing one of the pegasi just a few hours ago. Wait, was it a few hours ago?

“Time is 9:54 PM.” I whispered as I looked at my Pip-boy. “So, it was three hours. The explosion was… an hour ago, I think. Huh… I wonder what caused it, anyways.”

////////////////////////

One hour and three minuets ago…

It was a good day for Target , a light red stallion with a long white mane and no mark. He had found what he had needed for a long, long while.

When he and the others picked up the human, he had with him a large bag filled to the brim with clay blocks and balls, and a shirt. It was a dirty shirt, but it was a shirt. Something to keep him warm. Something to keep him dry. He needed this shirt for the nights he wasn’t with one of his mistresses. Not that he actually enjoyed their company, mind you. It was just better than shivering alone.

The smallest of the group of Bad Dreams, probably the youngest fit fighter, he was also the runt. He knew this well enough, and the other Night Stallions took full advantage of it. He had to fight for his food. Fight for a warm, dry cot. Had at several times, been tossed out of Weapon’s Day gatherings, only allowed to use a two by four with a single, rusted nail to defend himself when they went “hunting”. But with this shirt, his luck would change.

He walked around the camp, with the dirty flannel colored shirt covering most of his torso as he walked about. He felt powerful. Strong. Like he could take anyone on. Maybe even waking up from being a Bad Dream and getting a job doing something good.

Regretfully, when Monty, the second largest stallion and resident brown coated menace in the herd and Targets resident tormentor, walked up, he barely could say a thing as the thug yanked the shirt off his back and put it on himself.

Target’s head sank as he watched Monty put the shirt on himself, strutting around with his small clik within the herd, Rondo, Tic and Tock as they laughed at Targets misfortune.

“Damn it… I’d give anything to see that bastard just go to hell.” Target mumbled to himself as he watched Monty play with a unicorn toy. A small zap could be seen as an arc of magic hit Monty, making him shudder and laugh at it.

Target shook his head and began to walk away when he heard the familiar zap of the toy, and the all too familiar sound of high explosives going off. His eyes opened wide as he felt wetness on his back. He hesitated, but began to turn his head at the sight.

Monty was nowhere to be seen. In his place was a gore and scorch marked impression on the floor, and Rondo, Tick and Tock… or more accurately, their bodies, slammed against the walls of their small hideout. Target’s hoof reached behind him and pulled it back. He saw the tell tale red smear on the palm of his hoof. Blood, and it wasn’t his. He looked back at the smudge, smiled, and made a run for it.

Today was a good day for Target.

////////////////////////

Present

I didn’t hear any movement around the dumpster, so after catching my breath, I lifted the lid slowly and carefully. I didn’t see anyone either way, but waited a few seconds as I paid close attention to my surroundings. There were hardly any windows looking out of the buildings where I was at. No need to worry about anyone ambushing me as I stepped out, unless the Night Mares where wasting time and energy walking about with their invisibility spell on.

Of course, it could be more of like an enchantment. No need for constantly feeding when you can have it recharge every couple of hours… or days.

Damn, I’m going to have to ask Flure how magic works. It’ll make things a whole lot easier for me if I knew how it worked.

I managed to get out of the dumpster with minimal (relatively speaking) strain. I needed to get out of the city, but I had no idea how. Simplest thing for me to do would be to run down a street as fast as I could, but that would bring too much attention to me, and considering that I didn’t know if they had any traps-

CLICK

….

I looked under my shoe and noticed that I had stepped on a trip wire. Looking up let me see quite the sight of a large, four door truck crash landing just inches away from where I stood. And I still have not emptied my bladder. I don’t know what is going on with me, but I am hoping that when everything hits me in the future, that the pants I am wearing at the time are not expensive.

I looked at the heap of twisted metal beside me as the thought of my near-death experience tried to take roost in my mind, only to be tossed out like a drunk from a nudie bar with the shuffling of feet. Hooves. Whatever.

I decided to make like a banana sundae and get the fudge out of there.

Huh, I wonder if this whole thing is making me more witty.

“Opps, sorry. That was me.” Discord said as he peeked back into my vision looking non-apologetic as he apologized. “Hit the wrong neuron. You’ll be back to normal in five minutes.”

Damn it.

“Oh, and I’m almost done with your present.”

Not the best time, Discord.

Discord looked at what I was seeing and nodded. “Point taken. By the way, take a left up front, or else you’ll hit a dead end.”

I turned left sharply, thinking that “Hey, Discord would be killed too if I die, so why would he send me down the wrong path?” Which he replied…

“Actually, I’d just be trapped in the Pip Boy.” He coolly said, knowing I was not happy with him. “Waiting for the next fool to put me on. The good news is that I like you.”

Yay me.

“None of that now. One version of me had to deal with some gentlemen who kept on saying that. It got quite annoying, very quickly. Oh, and keep going straight in the next intersection.”

I didn’t let Discords little quip distract me for too long as I ran down the alleyway. I looked over my shoulder and saw two large stallions chasing after me. Don’t know what it was, but I turned my head back forward and closed my eyes. My lungs started to burn. I could barely think straight as I felt my feet snag onto something. I tripped, falling forward. I turned around, my right hand feeling slightly numb. I looked up as two shadows loomed over me. The two stallions where looking down at me, smiling venomously.

SLINK-SLINK

And then their heads exploded.

“Oh… well, hot damn.” I muttered under my breath as I began to stand up. I did the stupid thing and tried to use my left hand to balance myself. Oh, did my wrist not want any of that. “OH… ow… ow…ow…” I held my right hand close to my chest with my left, the coolness from the pip boy helping to keep the swelling down a bit. I decided to loot the bodies of the now dead Night Stallions, not really caring how they died.

I’m just going to chalk it up to God taking pity on the fat guy.

And boy, did he pity me.

I looked at the several needles of med-x and a nice police baton. Pocketing most of the med-x save for one needle, I injected a quarter of the contents into my wrist as best as I could. My left hand grabbed hold of the baton and I continued forward.

“Your being pretty stingy with the med-x, boy. You really think you should?” Discord tutted as I put the needle in my breast pocket. “You might need to do a lot more than just run, you know.”

I will not become an addict. I already have one full syringe in my system. I don’t need any more.

“My my. I suppose that is your dear poppa talking?”

…

“… I’m sorry. It seemed like my old demons like to rise up in inopportune times. You will have to excuse me. I do not like being imprisoned like this.” He actually sounded sincere this time.

I shrugged it off and continued forward.

////////////////////////////////////////////////

I so enjoy my profession.

The excitement of being a part of the action while being so far away is quite invigorating. Imagine seeing the world through a small glass hole, admiring and fantasizing what you want while in the safety of your own home? Anonymity. It’s a delicious feeling, I can assure you.

I stood at the rim, holding my sniper rifle close to my chest. Ragdoll, the sweet young mare she is, wanted to go with Sunday, Dumbass and Sunburn as they went into the long abandoned city to search for our newest addition to our “herd”, but after our Boss stepped in, she was stuck with helping her big sister with being a spotter.

“This is bullshit…” She muttered as she stood next to me. “He needs as much help as he can get. I’m not a filly anymore.”

I knelt down, patting her on the withers as I smiled. “I know, sweetie. The new… mmmm… man… needs as much help as he can get here.” I couldn’t help but giggle, bringing up a pair of binoculars. “I’d be more than willing to give it to him.”

Ragdoll gave an exasperated sigh as she glared at me. “You… you pervert. You know what I mean.”

I smiled as I looked through the binoculars, looking for movement. For a few seconds, all seemed more than a bit boring. Then I saw movement through windows. It was lethargic movement, but movement. Ragdoll saw it as well. It was sometimes strange how good her eyes where, but it made sense that she would be my spotter. I brought my rifle up as Ragdoll stood in front of me.

“Two clicks to the left. Big guy is limping. You see him?”

I nodded as my smile melted from my face. I didn’t like the look on his face. He was hurt, and I could tell he was looking behind him. I could see faster blurs behind him, and my blood began to chill.

Two Night Stallions, and they had a look in their eyes that I could never stand.

They wanted my plaything.

“What are you seeing?” Ragdoll asked several times as I began to turn off the safety.

“Don’t worry, hun. Daisy is taking care of it.”

Dear, sweet Jerry turned down an alley that I swear was looking right down the scope of my rifle. He probably could make a straight dash out if it wasn’t for the several blocks of buildings in his way. His plump self was adorable as he ran towards me. I stifled both a giggle and my fluttering heart as I saw him stumble. His fall, regretfully, brought my breathing to a standstill. His right wrist, as far as I could tell, was broken. Scratches and such could be mended, but we didn’t have any more stim-pacs for broken bones. A mixed blessing, meaning he would have to stay with us longer, but had to be looked after as well.

Mmmm… I would certainly enjoy being his nurse.

The thought almost clouded my mind as I saw the Night Stallions again.

“Daisy, what are they doing?”

“Shush, little sister. I need you to stay still for two…”

Bang-Bang!

“…seconds.” I almost moaned out as I watched the two stallions, their heads now a pasty mess on the ground and walls. I caught my breath as I watched my Jerry stand up, and began looking through the bodies. He took all the chems he could find and a police baton. He must not have used much of one of the chems, since after he stuck himself; he put it in his shirt pocket.

I watched him as he continued forward, and I smiled.

“Oh, I want him.” I whispered as I bit my lower lip.

“Keep your hands off him, Daisy. If he wants you, he’ll come to you.”

Spoken like a kid. But, maybe she is right. But I still want him.

“And keep your fingers on your rifle! I am not going to stand here while you clop behind me. It’s gross.”

“And your no fun, little sis.”

//////////////////////////////////////////////

I fucking love my job.

When you need heads slammed together, or bones broken, there is one stallion that you can count on for that.

“Sunburn…”

Damn, I can just hear the mares as they wait for me to grace them with my essence.

“Sunburn…”

I could care less that I’m doing this for some shit stain who can’t even take care of himself. The pink-skin mother fucker is probably a colt-cuddler, with how much he stuck around Dumbass and good ol’ B.S.

“SUNBURN, GET YOUR ASS IN GEAR BEFORE I BUCK YOU IN THE EMPTY SAC BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!”

“HOLY SHIT!” I couldn’t help but shout as I look back at B.S., her eyes staring daggers into me. Normally, a stallion like me wouldn’t be so disturbed by a mare like Bloody Sunday, but her eyes today. I couldn’t help but shiver. She may not be as strong as me, but she’d beat me to death if I didn’t do as she said. The Boss had split up with the Twins as we got close to the city. She didn’t tell me why, but I guess it isn’t really my place.

Of course, being stuck with B.S. and Dumbass, having to listen to them constantly, and all that shit did not make me happy.

I looked at my load out; A nice, heavy sledgehammer that I found in a shed in the town, and my sawed-off shotgun. Oh, hell is it fun getting up close and smashing the shit out of asshole’s! And it’s even better when you see their eyes flash from being happy little assholes to realizing that they are about to get Sunburned!

Yeah, that’s my catchphrase. Getting Sunburned!

I took the handle of the sledge in my mouth and pulled it out. Having such a big, heavy thing in your mouth would be hard for other ponies. But I’m Sunburn! There isn’t anything I can’t handle with my mouth!

…

…

Fuck. I’m glad I didn’t say that out loud.

The area around us only had like, two maybe four Night Stallions. The problem was that we were in a hollowed out building, and one of the fuckers had a plasma rifle with them. Don’t fucking know where the damn thing could have come from, but I did not want to be turned into a puddle of goo.

Now, any asshole can run from a fight. Sunburn, on the other hand, runs TO the fight. Fuck, I AM the fight!

I toss my hammer at the bucking fucker, and as he stumbles over his colt-cuddling hooves, I pull out my shot gun and…

Fucking Dumbass steals my kill! Uses his God damned rifle on him. He even shoots it like a griffon. Fucking ass, can’t even use his mouth to fire a damn gun.

“Hey, Sunburn, stop losing your hammer!” The asshole chuckles as he skips past me like a fucking mare.

“Fuck you, Dumbass!” Yeah. That’ll show him.

The other assholes ran away from the fight. Probably knew that I was coming to get them. Damn straight, they better run.

I walked over to my sledge hammer, the handle covered in blood. I leaned down and picked it up with my mouth, loving the taste of iron. I know that my mouth is going to be caked on with blood after this is all over.

I fucking love my job.

////////////////////////////////////////

My occupation brings me gratification.

That is one of the things I have to remind myself as I find myself fighting such plebeians. My real eye tracked the movement of the lone sniper as he tried to fly from rooftop to rooftop.

He thought that because he was a Pegasus that I wouldn’t notice him. Such a rookie mistake makes this next part so much more interesting.

My fake eye… I chagrin the use of the word “Cyber”, considering that it is such an unrefined term, can read him like a book. His heart rate is up. His breathing is far from steady. I can smell the Turbo he used to get this high. Two inches to the left will be good enough.

I maintain my grace as I felt the bullet fly past me, both eyes on my target.

There isn’t any reason to use a spell on him. Or even to use my… conventional weapons.

That’s why I enjoy walking the Twins.

I sit down, clearing my throat into my hoof.

“Girls… Play with the poor boy, will you?” I speak just loud enough to get to the two mare’s ears. I could never see them, as they enjoy “walking” just out of sight of everyone. But as Rip came close enough to me, I heard her giggle.

I made no attempt to make a shield as the foolish stallion aimed again at me, but his eyes met mine. I could tell, since his movements stopped. His heart-rate raised to unhealthy levels, and his breathing quickened, but he was in my trap.

Fear is a weapon that is best used sparingly. However, when you use it, make certain to use finesse.

With a handful of seconds of his life left, and the last thing I can make out as the Twins began to “play” was a plea to a God the fool ignored for his entire life. I stood back up and took out my revolver, loading it with hollow points.

Tonight, I was going to show my “neighbors” a new dawn to a day they will never be a part of. Tonight, I would see for myself what this human’s potential is.

I hope that he had chosen wisely.

///////////////////////////////

Running is never my strong suit. I mean, I’m not fit. Three hundred pounds was not meant to go very fast.

That being said, there is something about being chased around by a group of blood thirsty raiders (human or pony doesn’t matter) that gives me “encouragement” to keep going. But everyone has their limits. My bladder is said limit.

“I need to pee…” I muttered between gasps. I didn’t hear any hoof steps behind me, so I slowed down and looked at the buildings around me. I then saw it. A doughnut shop. And not just any doughnut shop. Donut Joe’s Donut Shop and Bakery!

“Oh, God… thank you…” I limped towards the door and stumbled into the boarded up windowed establishment. I was lucky that it wasn’t locked. I hoped that there was a clean-ish bathroom. Maybe a few Fallout Twinkies. You know what I DON’T want?

A sentry bot with two mini-guns for arms pointing at the door! “DEAR GOD!” I shouted as I curled up into a ball, waiting for… something. Five seconds passed, and I dared to peek up. The metal monster was unresponsive, despite the fact that it looked new. Well, newish. I uncurled myself and slowly walked towards the machine. I poked it, expecting it to rain hot lead on me.

I kind of felt stupid for doing it. Like, monkey poking a landmine with a stick stupid. Thankfully, I was not going to end up as a Darwin Awards nominee, at least not today.

“Note to self: do not touch robots. Hire other people to touch robots.” I mused as I looked around the room. Looking at where I was once standing, I noticed that the floor was riddled with bullet holes, and that the window to the door was not. My mind quickly came up with a hypothesis. Well, two. If the city was affected with a mind altering mega-spell, it wouldn’t affect machines… theoretically. (The Braintrons or whatever you want to call the rolling brain jars could be, if my theory was correct, and that would be… kind of nasty.) So the Mr. Handy’s could repair the store front. If it did, it would raise the question of why they didn’t fix the floor. Which brings the second hypothesis into the forefront.

There where survivors.

While my adventurers spirit wanted to look for clues, my bladder reminded me that I needed to pee. I waddled to the bathroom and, remembering bathroom edict, knocked on the door. Then I proceeded to face palm before opening the door.

My culture has not readied me for such emergencies. It’s readied me for flipping off rude drivers, complaining about stupid politicians, and blaming the dog for a rancid fart. It has not, to my knowledge, anything in place for post-apocalyptic toilet use.

Thankfully, no one(‘s remains) were inside, so I slipped in and, after putting the baton in arms reach… well… did what I needed to do. I then began thinking about why I didn’t actually use the pee bucket when I was in the closet. Or why I didn’t save the water.

I wasted perfectly good water! Cloudy, disgusting looking water, but it was better than nothing. I swallowed my spit as I let that sink in. For now on, I had to treat any moment where water is available as though as if it is the last… okay, maybe not “the Last”, but you guys get the gist.

I finished and looked at the sink. Thankfully, it looked like it was still working, so I didn’t have to resort to using “Rover’s Drinking Fountain”, especially after it was given a nice… I got to stop thinking about it. (Forgive me, Patches O’Houlihan. I cannot follow in your footsteps.) I cupped my good hand under the sink and took large slurps of water. I began to feel a whole lot better. Not, you know… bruises and burns being fixed better, but my HP bar was getting farther from the halfway point.

I stopped and grabbed hold of my baton, and began looking around the bakery, looking for anything of use.

Cash Register had a few bits in it, which I pocketed.

Found a safe that I couldn’t lock-pick, because of the lack of skill and hairpins.

Saw a computer that was still on, and no password. My Pip-Boy downloaded anything of use from it, so I can review it later.

Then I saw it. On the counter of the kitchen was a full box of Fancy Lad snack cakes! I couldn’t believe my eyes! My mouth suddenly watered as I walked towards the unopened box of- *Crunch*-

“What the…” I looked down, and then realized that I was currently stepping on the bones of some… guy.

“Oh… oh… Ewwwwww….” I gently stepped off the broken, dry bones and looked at them. At first I thought that someone had cut off the head of some guy and put a pony’s head on top, but then noticed the three fingered hands (That’s three fingers plus one thumb, by the way), very much like Daisy’s. My curiosity got the better of me as I knelt down and looked at the fingers. The bones where thicker, but not by much. He (I could tell because he was wearing what looked like a tattered suit) looked like he had been in a lot of pain during his last moments in life.

How, you may ask, would I know that since the poor sap was neigh but ash and bone? Because of the several broken ribs scattered around and the jaw that was shattered. My hypothesis was that he either got beat up horribly and crawled into the bakery to die, or he was shot by the Security Bot. I could only tell that the wounds where made before he died, not what caused them. And either way, it was a gruesome way to die.

Now, I will be forward to you guys on this, because you seem like the trustworthy sort. I kind of hoped that he deserved what he got. Not in the sense of Karma or God’s Judgement, but because… well, okay, maybe I am hoping it was God’s Judgement on the guy, but not like that. A jerk who did someone wrong, but then sacrificed himself to protect others sort of deal. You know, the kind of thing that could warm the heart a bit, making the idea of what I was seeing far more palatable.

Palatable…

Mmmmm… Donuts… Where are those Fancy Lads again?

“Focus, Fat Boy.” Discord said as he peeked back into my field of vision. I semi-ignored him as I took a few fancy lads out of the box and unwrapped them. “You shouldn’t eat too much of that.”

Like hell I won’t.

“So, you’re going to weight yourself down with sugary foods and hope it gives you a bit more oomph to your go?”

That’s the idea. You know, I should really be talking out loud for this. I mean, no one’s around. It’s not that weird to talk to yourself out loud.

“Where did you get that from?” Discord’s look on his face was twisted in slight confusion as I tried to remember. “It better be from some crackpot psychologist. I like them. They break a lot easier when you do the cigar trick on them.”

“What the hell is the Cigar Trick?” I suddenly regretted asking as I was reminded of the “disappearing Pencil” trick. I also regretted the fact that I said it out loud when I heard hoof steps outside.

“The hell was that?” A gruff voice carried in the air to me.

“Told you it wasn’t a good idea to talk out loud.”

Shut up, Discord.

“Oh, don’t get mad at me. Besides, I am helping you out. Just finished with half of my new gift to you.” Before I could ask anything else, I looked at the sentry bot and realized that on the HUD, there were instructions. “Hope you can work fast, Fat Boy. You’ll need to be if you want to activate the bot.”

Step One: Open panel on back.

Easy to do, since the back panel was already opened. I wonder why I didn’t notice it before?

Step Two: Insert red wire into Pip-Boy.

Same deal. Easy to do, since out of the various wires in the back, there was only one red wire, and it had a rather easy port on it, like a head phone jack. I inserted it into the Pip Boy, and then the third step lit up like a Christmas tree.

Step Three: Hold on for your life.

“Oh… crap.”

//////////////////////////////////

Dumbass and I chased after the group of Night Stallions down the street. It was pretty easy to get them on the run, even when handicapped with an idiot like Sunburn. However, besides the first two Raiders killed, we haven’t had any luck with cutting their numbers any more. I don’t like being lead around a city, and Dumbass could tell how anxious I was.

It would be easier if we had any clue as to where Jerry was. The easy way would be to wing one of the bastards and interrogate them, but I know that with Sunburn in his mood…

“I’m going to eat your spleen, you cock-bite!”

I’ll be lucky to have anything resembling a body if I try and incapacitate them.

Sunburn used his magic to levitate his shot gun around the side of the car he was crouching behind, firing it as he tried to look for a way towards the enemy across the street from us. Dumbass and I sat in a shop, trying to take pot shots. That was when I heard the clamor of hooves around the bend. Five more Night Stallions where making their way towards us, headed by a stallion who had to be five feet at the shoulders, wearing what probably was a bucket as neck protection. At least, that’s what I thought it was till I heard what he screamed.

“WHERE IS THAT FUCKING PINK APE!? HE’S GOING TO DIE LIKE THE LITTLE SHIT HE IS FOR PUTTING THIS THING ON ME!”

Heh. I wonder if I should tell him that making that kind of noise on the battlefield is a pretty stupid idea? Or that admitting to the fact you got tricked by a guy who’s experience in surviving in our world is counted by hours makes you look like a complete idiot? It would make him pissed, which would be fun. But I am being shot at right now.

“SUNBURN, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!” Dumbass shouted as he shot at the enemy. Sunburn grunted angrily as he dived into the shop behind me, sending glass all over the place.

“Damn it, Sunburn!”

“Hey, not my problem. I actually wear shoes on my hooves.”

“If you keep on talking like that, God and the Sisters help me, I will…”

“Shuuush…” Dumbass said as he tried to get our attention, pointing to his ears. I stopped talking and did the same as him, listening in. At first I only heard the laughing of the idiots out in the street as they explained the situation, but then I heard it again.

At first I thought it was a guitar, but something about it sounded disjointed, or just unnatural. Like the speakers in a supermarket where going out, but… intentional.

“Psycho-cho-cho-cho… Psycho, here we go!”

Sunburn’s mouth beat me to the punch with the question all three… maybe all of us in earshot had. “What the hell is that?“

The electric-guitar began to pick up, with drums giving a primal beat to it. Then the voice came.

“You push me till I break

and the anger turns to rage,

why won’t you just leave me alone?

You got your finger on the trigger

You think that you’re the winner

But your going to get kicked off of your throne-“

A sudden shuddering could be felt all around us as something hit against one of the store fronts. I risked a quick look and saw a robotic arm sticking out of a window, a mini-gun attached to it’s wrist, and aimed at the raiders as the song continued to play through the air. The muffled whirring of the mini-gun firing couldn’t overpower the song being played.

“You think your going to hurt me

Get ready to get dirty.

You created this beast inside-“

I retreated back to cover as I looked over at Dumbass. “Still got the Skeleton Key?”

Dumbass nodded as he rummaged through his pack and pulled it out. “Alright, won’t take too long to make him our little fri-…The hell?”

“What? What’s wrong?”

Dumbass looked back at me with a confused look on his face as he showed me the screen. On it was a simple sentence.

“Fat Boy on Board”

I couldn’t help myself as I tilted my head to the side. Sunburn looked over my shoulder and at the Skeleton Key. “… the Hell?”

The music continued as the Bad Dreams where either running away or being shot down by the massive robot, which was following the survivors quickly. As the mob and tormentor passed, I saw clinging on the back of the towering sentry bot Jerry, grabbing for dear life with a look of absolute terror on his face.

“… the Hell!?”

//////////////////////////////

I have seen a lot in my short life. I know how a still beating heart of a full grown stallion looks like. I have heard the sound somepony makes when a low grade explosive is shoved up a very tender opening and they are not going to blow up. I’ve heard the sound somepony makes when a low grade explosive is shoved up a very tender opening and it IS going to blow up.

I have never seen a pudgy human grabbing hold to the back of a sentry bot chasing after a group of raiders as some sort of foreign music is being belted out of somewhere, yet nowhere in particular.

“Daisy… are you-“I asked my big sister as she leaned over me with her rifle, her mouth open.

“Yes.”

The silence was palpable as we watched what was going on.

“He’s really favoring his left hand right now, isn’t he?” I noticed as the Sentry Bot turned sharply around a corner.

“Well, he probably broke his right arm when he fell.”

“HE FELL!? WHEN!” I could feel my eyes bulge as I turned to Daisy. I was not going to have her shi-

“Shush, little sis. Your moving too much.” Her fingers griped hold of my head and turned it fast yet gently forward. “It was before I covered his ample backside.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

She sighed as she tapped my shoulder, telling me to cover my ears. I did as I was signaled to do as she fired two shots at an unknown target. “Because I need you as my spotter. You’re starting to lose your focus now. Come on, little sis. We all want to see him walk out of this. Well… maybe not Sunburn, but he’s an asshole.”

I didn’t know if she was saying that to make me feel better or if she really meant it, but I couldn’t hide the smile on my face. I stayed still, looking out onto the city, and found The Boss standing on the other side of the city, her revolver glowing next to her as she hid behind a cement wall. I bit my lip as I watched her, but I knew that telling Daisy about it would be a moot point. The Boss never liked having help when she got involved.

I just shook my head as I looked back at where Sunday and Dumbass where, and could make out that they had ran to follow Jerry. I smiled a bit as I watched her go after him, and could tell that they could get him out of this problem.

This left me wondering one thing. How the hell had he managed to get on the back of the Sentry Bot?

//////////////////////////////////////////

Oh, Lord, don’t let me loose my fancy lads over the nice robot.

“Told you not to eat them.”

I wasn’t in any shape to actually argue with the Chaos spirit. The Bot was going a lot faster than I thought he was going, and doing a fairly good job at keeping them on the run. Regretfully, because the Sentry Bot didn’t have any concept of “don’t run over the dead bodies”, I couldn’t look down, leaving me looking up at the sky as I struggled to keep my lunch down.

“Jerry? What the hell are you doing up there?” I heard a very familiar voice call out to me. I looked behind me as much as I could, and saw Sunday.

I don’t know how to explain it. I could feel my eyes water up as I saw her and DA. I mean, I’ve known them for barely a day, but knowing that they were there for me was… was… heart achingly amazing. It also lead me doing one of the stupidest things I have done in the last fifteen minutes.

I used my right arm, the one that I had decided during the last big turn was probably more than just sprained, to hold onto the bot as I looked back. “SUNDAY! DA! Thank God! These guys did… and then the room… and the bucket!” I was on the verge of bawling when a sudden jerk made me fall off the bot’s back, disconnecting my Pip-boy from the bot.

Sunday was the first by my side, and hugged me around my neck. I almost didn’t care about the fact it was hard for me to breath. Before I could complain, however, she let go of my neck and smacked me on the shoulder. “Don’t ever do that again, you stupid pink fat man! You know how worried you made Ragdoll?”

“Sorry, Sunday.”

D.A. Came next, and punched me in the other arm. “And don’t you ever smack my ass like that again, man. Just not cool.” Before I could apologize, DA replaced Sunday’s vice-like grip with his own neck hug.

“Gaaaay…” Sunburn shouted from a safe distance. DA stopped hugging me and glared at him.

“Hey! Get your ass over here and say that to my face!”

“Dumbass! Not now!” Sunday shouted as she looked back at the Bot, which was slowly starting to wind down.

“Oh, well… that’s not good.” I said with a slight waiver in my voice as I stood up. DA grabbed hold of my right arm as I stood up, then looked at Sunday.

“Broken ulna… probably tripped and fell onto his arm.” He looked back at me. “You got any weapon on you?”

I pulled out my baton with my left hand, and the groaning from DA and Sunday would be considered legendary if it wasn’t for the music that was still playing. “Hey, it was the best I could get after they took my pistol.”

Sunday hurried me away as her aura put the baton on my right arm and used a stip of cloth from a nearby “former” Night Stallions jacket to tie the stick to my arm as an impromptu brace. “Don’t try anything, you hear? We’re getting you out of here.”

I nodded as the three of us walked past Sunburn, who had a weird smile on his face as he looked behind us. The Night Stallions had almost been completely wiped out, save for three. Big Red and two other earth ponies that did not look like push overs. The Sentry Bot didn’t stand a chance as the three tore one of the mini-guns off it’s arm and started beating it with it. I was looking at it, with my own two eyes, and I still couldn’t believe it!

“Thanks for leaving me with three of the weaklings, Pinkie. I hope that you realize how much of an honor it is to have me save your gargantuan ass.” He smirked as he held onto his sledge hammer in his teeth.

“You know… looking at my ass is kind of gay, dude.” I rebutted with a smirk of my own.

He didn’t respond. I don’t know if he heard me, but after DA, Sunday and I turned the corner, I heard a howl I had only heard from a starving wolf in video games, and a sickening thud like meat being hit by a slab of concrete.

“It’s going to be messy on that street, isn’t it?” I asked Sunday.

She nodded as she let me lean onto her. “Those three didn’t even stand a chance.”

///////////////////////////////

Three stallions. The one in the middle with the weird collar is definitely going to be the harder one to fight, but if I focus on him, I’m open to the other two. Kind of makes my choices easier.

I stood my ground as I looked at the three slowly walk towards me after they three the mini-gun on top of the corpse of one of their friends, letting the sound of his insides turning to mush echo through the streets. The one on the left had a slight limp in his rear leg.

A nice place to start.

The Stallion on the left had been coughing a bit. Probably from smoking.

Another nice place to start.

I decided to settle this problem the best way I knew how. The Sunburn Equation of Pain and Suffering.

First, look at my enemy. Then add in my trademark grin, with plenty of my currently blood stained pearly whites gripping my weapon of choice.

“Goddesses… what the hell is wrong with him?”

Right one is freaked out, his eyes looking at me with disgust as he tried to ready himself with his attack, but he’s freaking out just the same.

Second, I begin to laugh. Not just any kind of laugh, though. The kind I found out could make anypony shudder with fear.

“Gehehehehe…. GEHEHEHEHEHEHE!”

The left one backed off. I just got my plan ready. Just need the finishing touch.

I shouted at the top of my lungs the first bullshit thing that came to mind (I never remember what I say, but the last time, Daisy told me I said something about bicycles made of meat) as I lunged at the Stallion to my right. I got on my hind legs as I swung my body around, my neck bracing for the force of my hammer trying to escape my grasp. The Stallion couldn’t even move, his eyes widen as the head of my sledgehammer connected with his neck. I felt his neck break as I sent the corpse flying towards the red one. I felt a sudden surge of adrenalin as I skidded to a halt, still turning as the rest of the energy from my swing dissipated. I turned to the next stallion, the one right across the street, and ran at a full sprint to him. I bowed my head low as my horn glowed, and as I slid between his legs, he instinctively jumped up just in time to meet the shotgun blast from my gun I managed to keep floating behind me.

His brain just went EVERYWHERE!

Man, was it funny. I turned to the last one, who… didn’t look phased at all.

“I fucking don’t have time for this shit.” He grabbed hold of the body of the first stallion in his jaws and threw him right at me. I rolled away as he threw something at his feet. Before I could tell what it was, it burst into smoke, and I was left coughing and wheezing as the fucking asshole made his escape!

“FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-!”

/////////////////

The streets where rather calm, to my surprise. I followed my fake eye’s directions as I could make out three heat signatures from a nearby building. By what I could tell, it was the remains of a school. I stood at the entrance as I kept my eyes on the windows.

“Girls, go to Daisy and Ragdoll. Make sure they are safe.”

Rip managed to peek out from a trashcan near me, looking sad. “Boss? You not die yet, right?”

I smiled as warmly as I could at her. “No, little one. I won’t die yet. I promised you two that I would let you drink my blood while it was warm, not when it is cold and stale.” A sentence I had grown too used to. I had already lamented that years ago.

Rip smiled back at me as she motioned for her sister to follow. I didn’t bother to watch them leave. They knew how to follow orders.

I walked to the schools doors, ready for movement at the windows. I got to the door and felt the arcane workings of a hex. It was a low level affair that I managed to wipe away with a wave of my horn, but I could feel that I had made a mistake. One of the figures I saw perked it’s head up, like a bird would when it heard an uncertain noise. Most likely, she had layered a connection spell on the hex. Any kinds of tampering would have alerted her, and since it was such a low key affair, I would have had to have been looking for it to find it.

I had no intentions of actually looking for such things, however. I had no intentions of keeping a low profile. I kicked the door open and rushed into the room. I could feel the hum of a magical bolt passing through a horn as it shot out over my head. I managed to get to a wall, and looked at my surroundings.

It was an old lobby, dirt clinging to most surfaces including the lockers against the walls. I made my way to a door labeled simply “lobby”. The room was devoid of the attacker I dodged moments before. I could feel that this was the best way to get to my objective.

I slid into the room as I heard hoof steps. The lobby was a mess. What was once the secretary’s desk was upturned and torn to pieces. A gaping hole was in the wall leading to a nearby classroom as the ceiling of the Headmaster’s office had collapsed. I peered into the classroom and saw the remains of several ponies thrown about. At first I didn’t pay it any mind as I stepped forward. It wasn’t till I was halfway into the room that I had noticed the small limbs on the now dried corpses.

It would be easy to tell that this was remnants from the war that the Bad Dreams had simply refused to get rid of. That was till I smelled the scent of more recent rotting.

I didn’t bother looking for it. Bad Dream’s were notorious in killing their offspring, especially colts. There was no reason to kill them for someone I didn’t know. Children dying in the wasteland was normal.

I hated reminding myself that, but it was a sad truth.

I saw the figure that fired at me returning to the others rather quickly. If I had to make a guess, they were in the classroom across the hall from my current location. As I made my way to the door to the hallway, I began to hear what was being said by the Night Mare.

“Fucking bitch must have teleported! I didn’t see here in the hallway.”

An exasperated sigh came from the taller form. “You did check the lobby, didn’t you?”

A moment of silence passed. I heard something being lifted up in the air and smack the other mare hard. I grinned as the first mare gasped at whatever new wound she received.

“Go check! I don’t want anypony walking in on me while I do the ceremony!”

Ceremony? Bad Dreams weren’t known for any kind of cult-like activities. Just mindless attacks and bedlam. What kind of ceremony would they find the need to keep even their groups survival at risk?

“Alright, alright… but I still think we should have gone with using the human as soon as we got him instead of using Night Shade’s little shit.”

Night Shade was the third Night Mare, if I wasn’t mistaken. That would mean that the third form I was seeing on the floor was a filly. But that didn’t make any sense. The heat signature I was seeing was the size of a full grown mare.

Before I could go further into my thought process, I heard a small group making their way towards the school. I looked and saw three figures. Two ponies and a human. I bit my bottom lip as I stifled a curse. That was when I made out the sound of music playing. I could make out the words, but just barely.

“Circus for a Psycho!”

“Damn it, Jerry, can you turn that off?”

“I don’t even know how it turned on.”

The first Night Mare giggled quietly as her horn began to activate. It didn’t take much to tell what she was going to do. I had a choice to make. I knew that they where not prepared for a fight, and I was putting the three in danger, but I needed to know what the second Night Mare was up to.

I would have to trust them.

I finally began to hear the muffled whimpering from the filly as I opened the door. The door to the room across the hall was open, showing the second Night Mare as she stood over a bundled up pile of fur. She held a Ripper in her aura, ready for something. “If we got the human, then we don’t need you.”

I didn’t know what came over me. I pride myself in the manner that I control my baser instincts, but as I heard that, my magic surged as a chair flew up from behind her and hit her in the back of her head. Instead of knocking her out, she stumbled over the filly and out of my sight. The Ripper laid on the floor near the filly.

“Gaaah…. What the hell?” She grunted. I looked and saw where the other Night Mare was at, and saw that she, as well as Jerry, Sunday and Dumbass were already on the other side of the school. I made my way out of the room I was and leaned against the opposite wall. I wanted the mare alive.

“Ooh hoho… I see you…” She sang in a wicked tone as I saw her horn flash. The wall behind me burst apart, and I felt heat and pain on my flank. Instead of turning to the attacker, I brought my revolver up and entered the room, fireing at the figure that ran out into the hallway I was once in.

Two shots, two misses.

I managed to get the Ripper into my aura as I kept my fake eye on my target, who was now making her way back to the door. I stood my ground, feeling my back legs shaking. I wouldn’t be running away. And it was for the better. The energy for my fake eye was dwindling to unhealthy levels.

The Night Mare stood at the door, a shield up as she looked in at me. “You are a tricky little bitch.” Another figure appeared from the other opening. An exact duplicate of the Night Mare in the doorway. I inwardly cursed my luck as I brought the two weapons up, pointing at the two figures. I couldn’t hold onto both and create a shield, so I was left vulnerable as both of my eyes darted to both figures. “Of course, I’m a pretty tricky Bitch myself.”

////////////////////////

“Hey there, sweetie!”

“Oh, hell…” I mumbled to myself as I looked around the room. Jerry was gasping for air as he looked at Sunday. She brought her shotgun up and aimed it around.

The damn music continued to play, and I could tell that it was getting on both Sunday and Jerry’s nerves. Jerry gritted his teeth as he looked around the room. ”Come on, Discord… shut the music off so I can concentrate!”

“Jerry?”

He didn’t pay any attention to me, but did look behind us, to the front door. “Behind us, aim at the knob!”

I was surprised that Sunday didn’t ask any questions. She simply turned and shot, leaving a large hole in the door and a very agitated Jerry. “Damn it! It was right there!”

“It? Oh, Pink Boy, that is such a mean thing to say.” The voice was like the song, not coming from any one direction.

“Sorry, Buddy, but we really can’t tell much about you from just your voice. It’s kind of hard to tell what you are.” I said. Jerry and Sunday looked at me, a bit confused, till we all heard the slight growl in the air. We began to limp towards a hallway, Jerry standing on his own now letting me get on my feet. We began to speed up, me and Sunday staying on both sides of Jerry as he scanned the area.

“If you can’t say anything nice, BOY, don’t say anything at-“

“Ten o’clock! High!”

I shot up at the ceiling, letting debris fall down. A slightly ghostly figure covered in grime could be seen.

“DAMN IT!” It ran down the hallway quickly, and we began to hear the sounds of hooves on steps. We followed as quickly as we could up the stairs.

“Heh… kind of nice knowing that I don’t need a gun to be helpful.” Jerry said with a chuckle.

“Don’t congratulate yourself yet, Jerry Boy! We ain’t leaving here till that Night Mare is down!” Sunday said with a smile.

I don’t know why, but it feels good working with both Sunday and Jerry. I mean, I know why I love working with Sunday. We’ve been working together for years, even before the Boss came. One day working with him, though, and things just clicked. Like he was always supposed to be with us. I don’t just mean working with me and Sunday, either. I don’t know, maybe I’m thinking too much into things. I know that he makes Sunday happy, and that’s a feat all in its own right.

Maybe it’s because of Wick. I think once the day is done, I’m going to tell Jerry about him. I doubt that he’s going to leave us any time soon, so it might be a good idea to tell him about our life. It would be-

“Six o’clock! Low!”

I shot my rifle ahead of me as I heard clopping and curses. “I think we’re getting to her!”

A sudden explosion rocked the school building. Nothing was crumbling, which was a good thing, but it reminded me that we needed to keep ourselves focused. Who know what is going on here. Sunday kept to the right side of the hallway as I kept to the left. Jerry crouched, but insisted on staying in the center. As we walked forward, we heard the laughing as Jerry brought his arms out, as though as if he was in the dark.

That was when we heard it.

*Crack!*

Everyone froze and looked around at the walls and the ceiling. But then we looked at the floor. In a near perfect circle around Jerry was a dark green aura.

“Lets see how you two assholes do without your eyes!” The cackling voice rang out through the hallway as the aura dissipated. Jerry didn’t have time to jump off, but he did the second best thing. He bent his legs and braced himself as he brought his arms close to his body, protecting his vital areas as he fell.

Was it horrifying seeing him fall? Fuck yes it was! But after a few seconds of waiting, we heard moaning from the hole. I walked over and after looking around for any signs of a further ambush, looked down the hole. The son of a bitch was still standing on top of the rubble, shivering from the burst of adrenaline.

“Hey, Jerry, you dead?” I yelled down.

“Yeah, man…” He said in a weird accent. He looked around himself and giggled oddly. “And so is the other Night Mare…”

“WHAT!? Oh, Fuck me!” The target said as she de-cloaked, running to the hole, totally ignoring me and Sunday. One look down, and her jaw dropped. “Oh, I am soooooo screwed… I give up!”

“Sorry, lady, we don’t take prisoners.” I raised my gun up to her head as she raised her hooves up to defend herself.

“Dumbass, stand down.” A strong voice came from the hole, as well as a yelp from Jerry. “We’ve got things to settle.”