Dogs!
CHAPTER TWELVE - DOGS
"The present has no rhythm." -Daft Punk
Dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs. They were are always right there. In my dreams. In the Wasteland. Barking whenever I stood at the threshold of something really big.
But it was just noise. Weird sounds off in the distant hills or something. Never, you know, actual dogs.
Lemme back up a bit. I was laying there in the hospital bed, clutching the get well card that I'd hidden Misty Mountain's nasty old tail hair in. It was an actual for-real relic from the Wasteland. Something I could hold. Something I could touch. Proof that all that crazy shit had actually happened. More importantly, it was a reminder of my Trottica friends.
I clutched that card like it was one of those life saver donuts they huck at ponies who fall out of boats.
Bananas Foster was still behind her curtain. A major relief. I didn’t want anypony to see me freaking out and panicking.
Where did it come from? Why just the hair? What else could I take with me?
I whipped the get well card open to make sure it was still safe, and slammed it shut just as quickly. Then, oof! It dawned on me: I probably should handle the thing a bit more gingerly. So I freaked out all over again cause I thought I might have screwed it up. A gentle peek confirmed that the hair was fine.
Still, there was a giant question mark made out of fire and nails and acid and snakes bouncing around the inside of my head. Why? Not to mention its twin sister, The-Fuck-How?
I could hear crying behind the curtain. Foster was coming apart back there. She wasn’t whining at nurses. She wasn’t criticizing my friendship skills. She wasn’t making a plea for storytime or any stupid shit like that. Just sobbing to herself in little whispers. For once trying not to be heard.
“Are you okay?”
“Fine,” she coughed.
"Are you sure?"
But she didn't answer after that, so I left her alone. Maybe she was as off-the-wall crazy as Cliff Diver, and she actually believed me. News of the apocalypse might have been a bit too much to take in before bedtime. Or maybe she was just plain crazy in some totally different way I wasn’t prepared to deal with. She was a teenager who acted like she was six-years-old. Who could even tell with her?
The point is that between her whimpers, the chirps of the medical bleep-a-majigs, and the sound of my own panicky heart climbing up into my head and thumping away like a hammer against the inside of my skull, I couldn't hear very much else.
But eventually I grew aware of it. The barking sound.
When I realized what it was, I gripped that get well card so hard I crumpled a corner of it in my hoof.
"Oh, no." I thought. "Not here.”
Why did I send my family away?! What if I dreamt again while in the fucking hospital? Woke up with bizarre injuries? Thrashed in my sleep and said things nopony ought to hear? Sweet Celestia, what if I died that night, and Roseluck and Cliff spent their rest of their lives going "If only, if only, if only!"?
I looked around me. Not a sign or a clue that I might be in a dream. Nothing. Just a boring empty old room with a bunch of useless medical junk in it.
Then I heard a great baying howl. It was getting closer, louder. More articulate. That’s not supposed to happen!
Whatever was making that noise, it was fucking there. In the hospital with me. This Wasteland dogthing. It had actually found my scent somehow, and it was coming.
That or my mind had taken a giant high dive out the window into a swimming pool full of cottage cheese, mane conditioner, and spatulas, and I’d just lost all ability to tell the fucking difference between present and future.
"Bananas!" I whispered.
No reply.
"Hey, Foster, you hear that?"
Again, she said nothing. Just sniffled to herself and ignored me.
"Foster!!” I finally snapped; I couldn’t take her silence anymore.
But still, she gave no reply. Then I heard the barking again. It was close.
“Luna, help me. Luna, help me. Luna, help me.” I chanted to myself.
In my condition, I was pretty sure at that point that nopony else could.
I folded the card up in a hurry, shimmied and wedged the thing safely under my back. Then pasted my eyes to that bucking door. No dog, or shadow, or monster, or pony was going to pry Misty Mountain's nasty old tail hair from me. I gripped the sheets and shook with anger at the mere thought of it.
"No way. I whispered to myself. "No fucking way."
Bang! Crash! Yelling. Screaming just outside my door.
The nurses! They were out there with that thing. The thought of them getting all killed and mutilated and eaten up on my watch was so horrifying that I forget to breathe. I needed to get up. To get help. To get them help. Those nurses never did anything to hurt anypony!
“Argg!” I grunted in frustration.
Why couldn't the fucking dog have come when more goose doctors were on duty? It could eat as many of those jerkface fucks as it wanted to.
I tugged gently on one of the tubes, to see if I could get it out of my hoof. No way.
It's not like in the books you read. You can’t just yank them out and then go trotting along on your merry way, fighting zombies.
Scramble, scramble, scramble, scramble, scramble.
Something zipped down the hallway right past my door. I didn't even hear it coming.
“Buck, buck, buck, buck, buck!” I tried tugging on the wires again, but there was just no way.
That thing hurt like crazy. There's a needle in there!
"Somepony get some rope!" Nurse Stethoscope shouted from just outside my door.
Rope?
“I got it, I got it!” Called another.
No one shouts for a rope to tie down The Living Embodiment of Their Own Most-Awfulest-of-Fears.
I held up my evil hoof. Tapped it as though it were broken. The damn thing wasn’t even cold.
The barking in my dreams had showed up just before the end, right? Just before I woke up. Each and every time. I mean, the dogs show up right before something big happens. That's what they do.
But that didn’t make them Evil. Not necessarily.
I took a deep breath and silenced the orchestra of rambling voices in my head. I couldn't run or fight. I couldn't even sit up properly, but this was still my problem - my apocalypse to deal with, and this monster dog-a-majig was bothering my fucking nurses. I had only one option, as much as I hated to admit it. And it scared the buck out of me.
I swallowed hard and told the cowardly pirate inside my head to get stuffed.
“Come here boy, come here!” I said in my sweetest voice - raspy and fucked up though it may have been. “Who's a good dog?"
"Are you nuts?" Foster finally spoke up. "Sssshhh!"
"Sure, now you hear me!" I snapped. "You alright?"
"Ssssh!" She replied.
I took that as a yes.
“Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?” I continued.
As I paused to catch my breath, I found that the barking had actually stopped. The clamoring too. It had noticed me.
Either I was a total genius, or I had about fifteen seconds before I got turned into rosemeat.
Before I could think on it any further, the thing bounded right on in - fast as lightning in a hurry - and before I could even flinch, it was already on top of me.
"Eek!"
Yes, I literally said eek. It slobbered on my face and pinned me down with its crushing weight. Definitely friendly. But it licked my eye of all places and I still couldn’t see a damn thing. It was actually hurting me.
"Ow stop that!" I squirmed.
The thing had the worst breath I had ever smelt. Like really, really, really, really, really old oatmeal. But it listened.
It stopped licking me the moment I told it to, and when I rubbed my face with my only free hoof, it didn’t give any resistance.
Just looked me square in the eyes. And that's when I finally got a look at hers.
"What the--;"
The damn bark-y thing was a pony! A fucking pony. A crazy blue lady with hair like a birds nest.
"Uh, hi." I said.
She lunged her face at me again, and tried to lick at me some more, but I wouldn’t have it.
"No!" I snapped. “Stop it. Sit!”
Again, she actually listened to me. And sat. Right there on top of my leg.
"Rose, Rose, are you okay?" said Bananas Foster in a panic.
The crazy dogmare turned to face the curtain and growled.
"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine." I grunted, trying not to let it show that the weight of a full grown pony on my leg actually hurt quite a lot.
Next thing I know the room is full of nurses and orderlies.
The Dog Lady hopped off me in a rush and scurried under my hospital bed.
“Oof!” I oofed as she stepped on my stomach.
Once I caught my breath, I found that the room was totally still. All the grown-ups were staring at me. Frozen in place.
“I’m fine!” I yelled as best as I could through all the coughing. “Don’t hurt her, she’s harmless.”
But Nurse Redheart was stepping closer and closer to me, inching up slowly. The fear in her eyes told me something was terribly wrong. Something I couldn’t see.
“She’s harmless.” I whispered.
With a grunt, I turned myself over on my side, and reached my evil hoof over the edge of the bed. I was just feeling my way around for the dogmare. But one tiny motion, and the whole room gasped at once. It sounded like steam escaping.
“Don’t move.” Said Redheart. “Please, just hold still.”
I did as I was told. It was no easy position to hold, leaning over my own IV, dangling my other hoof over the edge, but I didn’t dare move. I wasn't stupid.
“What’s going on?” I whispered.
Before the nurse could answer, my hoof brushed up against the mane of the crazy dog lady. She licked my hoof in reply.
“Its gonna be okay, girl.” I patted her head. “Shh.”
Then I felt something else down there and realized why everypony was so tense.
"Listen," said Nurse Redheart. "Were not gonna hurt her. You're right.”
She tip-hooved closer. “She's harmless. But she’s very close to a lot of machinery and important stuff running into your hoof."
I knew that. I could feel it. I glanced over at the tubes and wires that I'd tried to get free from just a minute ago.
“If she knocks into them, you could get hurt," said Redheart both calm and cautious-like. "Do you understand?"
I nodded.
The dog lady looked up at me from underneath the bed. She knew damn well that playtime was over. But she didn't run. She just sat there looking at me with these fragile lunatic eyes. They screamed at me for help. Threw a trust at my hooves so complete - so unconditional - that it actually frightened me a little.
My own eyes started to water in reply.
Nurse Stethoscope and the Nursedoctor inched closer, but the dogmare tensed and growled at them.
“Shh!” I said quickly. “I’m gonna call you Queenie. Do you like that name?”
It was literally the first thing to pop into my head.
She looked up at me from under the bed with such elation and joy that I almost forgot to breathe.
“Actually.” Nursedoctor said. “Her name is Screw Loose.”
"Do you mind?" I snapped. "I'm trying to--;"
Queenie thrust her head all the way out from under my bed to growl at him. It tugged on the tube so hard I could actually feel it.
“Ow,” I winced meekly.
Stethoscope smacked Nursedoctor in the shoulder.
Nursedoctor smacked him right back. “You got some nerve. You’re the one who started this whole stupid thing. I told you to quit teasing the dog.”
“Oh come on, it was just--;”
“Out, everypony out.” Said Redheart.
“What?”
“Too many chefs.” She snapped. “Out. Now.”
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
They did as they were told and tiphooved out the door.
“It’s gonna be okay, Queenie.” I said.
I pet her till she stopped growling.
“Why do you even keep that crazy dog around?” Whined Bananas Foster.
That got Queenie all revved up and barking again.
“Ow,” I winced. My eyes watered up some more, this time just because of the pain in my hoof.
“Bananas, quiet!” Said Nurse Redheart, never taking her eye off of me. “Stethoscope!”
He came galloping back.
“Keep the kid occupied until Rose is safe.”
Nurse Stethescope nodded.
“Hey, but--;” Bananas’ started to protest being dismissed, but her whining kinda trailed off when Stethoscope pulled up a stool beside her. After that point, all I could make out over there was a bunch of murmuring. I guess Bananas Foster got her storytime after all.
Meanwhile, I pet the dog lady’s head frantically. My good hoof - the one with the tubes in it - was starting to hurt.
“Please, calm down.” I whimpered at her. “Please.”
Queenie watched me carefully with great big soulful eyes. She saw the pain I was in. But all she could do was look at me sadly. Then, out of nowhere, this little flicker ran across her face. I could see it. It was a weird moment, where she just sorta looked around. At me. At the nurses. At the tubes.
And that was when the poor thing went pale with horror. Queenie realized that she was the cause of my pain.
“It’s okay,” I whispered, petting her as best I could, but damnit, my hoof really fucking hurt. “It’s okay.”
I was short of breath. It was getting harder to talk.
Nurse Redheart spoke up again. “Listen, I need you both to stay calm, and--;”
Her voice trailed off, not out of fear, but amazement.
Screw Loose was calmly disentangling herself from my tubes and wires. Her movements seemed less dog-like - just for an instant. And then, just like that, she was out from under the bed. She looked over her shoulder at me. She wanted so bad to say she was sorry. I could tell. But she couldn’t even muster a whine.
Instead, Queenie slunk away, tail between her legs, toward Nurse Redheart, who sorta stood there speechless. The poor thing didn’t even flinch or try to run when Nurse Stethoscope reached for his rope. Just sat meekly at Redheart’s heel, crying.
“No ropes.” Said the head nurse.
“But--;”
“No ropes.”
Redheart patted Queenie on the head. Queenie was sobbing now. Heaving. It was one of the most unnerving things I’d ever seen. A grown mare. Coming apart like that.
“Check the injection site.” Redheart said to the other nurse.
Next thing I knew, he was all over my hoof, checking the machines. Prodding at the tubes. Tapping gauges.
“She’s okay.” Stehtescope gave the hooves up.
“Keep an eye on her.” Said Redheart. “I’ll be right back.”
She turned to the dog lady, and said. “Come on, let’s get you home.”
Queenie followed without protest, head hung low. Too ashamed to even look my way. She knew what had almost happened.
It was truly tragic. Just pony enough to understand. Still too much of a dog to really cope. Screw Loose whined with each dragging hoofstep. Just listening to it tore my soul into pieces.
“Queenie,” I called to her with effort.
Nurse Redheart stopped and stood in the doorway. The dog turned vaguely in my direction to face me, but still averted her eyes in shame.
“You’re a very, very good dog.” I said.
Bam! A thousand pounds lifted from the crevices in her face. All at once. She literally leapt with joy and bounced up and down, looking up to Nurse Redheart as if to say, “Did you hear that? Did you hear that? Didya? Didya? Didya?”
They trotted out the door together. Queenie with held her head up high. She was a good dog. I’d told her so!
“Be right back,” Redheart called to us, already in the hallway.
I was left alone with Nurse Stethoscope. At first he didn’t say anything. Didn’t make eye contact. Nothing. The bleep-a-majig just chirp-chirp-chirp-ed away, and that was that.
It was so quiet, I heard every little hook and ring on Bananas Foster’s curtain as it dragged across the rack. She was watching. Kinda timid. Kinda hopeful. That girl was strangely obsessed with Nurse Stethoscope and his stupid story time. It was sad in its own way.
I just ignored them both and waited for Redheart to get back. I needed to hear that Queenie had made it back okay. That she wasn’t scraping away at the door of whatever room they kept her in. That she wasn’t howling to be let out and see me again.
She was a fragile dog.
“You're very lucky there,” said Good Old Stethoscope with a smile as he tapped the machine.
I just stared him down in reply. That bastard had messed with my friend. And I wanted him dead.
Luckily, he backed off. Stumbled backwards in a hurry like I was some kind of poisonous snake.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Stethoscope and I were alone together for a little while. And he looked at everything in the whole damn room, so long as it wasn’t me. The ceiling. The floor. The meters on the machines. Any excuse to avoid eye contact.
Somehow he reminded me of tunnel number two back in the Trottica mines. The stampede. Kids who were all about unity, and togetherness, and fighting the good fight until the lights went off and nopony was watching. Then they dropped their druggos like sacks of moldy pears. Just 'cause they could. 'Cause nopony would ever know.
Nurse Stethoscope was like that. He was all "Hey, kids," one second, and, “Let me tell you a story,” and acted super friendly and nice. ‘Till you got him alone with somepony who couldn't tattle on him. Then he was a druggo-dropper. Which makes him worse than a fucking shadow thing if you ask me, cause at least with them, you know exactly what kind of evil you’re dealing with.
I watched him closely. He was way more tired than he had been just a few minutes before. What did that druggo-dropping fuck do to Queenie? I thought.
I would’ve asked, but if this guy’d babbled some dumb excuse about how all he’d done is tease her a little bit. How it was just some good fun. How he didn't mean any harm by it. Or any of that shit, I would have ripped that stupid needle out of my hoof, lunged across the room and stabbed him in the eye with it.
The only thing keeping me from doing it that very second was the knowledge that, at the very least, Queenie seemed to be physically alright.
In any case, Nurse Stethoscope was smart enough to shut the hell up, and quit trying to win me over, but the second that Redheart came back, he was out of there. That swell guy persona is hard to keep up when there's a broken-hearted, furious little kid staring you down, and he couldn't wait to get away. Didn't even stop to say goodbye to Bananas Foster who actually kinda needed him in a weird messed-up way that I couldn't quite put my hoof on.
* * *
Nurse Redheart trotted up to me and asked to examine my leg. I nodded.
“You alright?" She said, trying to be all reassuring.
“I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine!” I said. “Is Queenie okay?”
Redheart bit back a smile. “Screw Loose has had a long night, but yes, she's doing just fine now.”
I sighed relief.
“Really?”
“She’s sleeping.” Redheart chuckled. “I’ve never seen her so content.”
“Content?”
She nodded with a smile.
Content. What kinda dog is content after getting her escape thwarted? After getting locked up all over again? What kinda pony even?
Nurse Redheart put her hoof on my shoulder and whispered, “Can I let you in on a little secret?”
“Um...Sure.”
“I think you're the best thing that ever happened to that mare.”
Holy Celestia, way to stab me right in the heart with a fork made out of sunshine and happiness. I smiled so hard it squeaked.
“I need you to do me a favor, though.” She leaned in and whispered even more quiet-like.
Not even Bananas Foster could hear us.
“What is it?”
“I need you to be totally quiet about this.”
Before I could even ask why, Nurse Redheart explained that she was going to have to write up a whole bunch of stupid paperwork about what had happened that night, and while she didn't know what she was going to say, she was damn sure it wasn't going to be the truth.
I zipped my lip and mimed putting the zipper in my pocket, even tho I didn't actually have any pockets. Then we got some more of that hospital silence. Not the awkward kind. Just a quiet understanding.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Queenie was off sleeping tight somewhere. Content. Thinking about me. I was so happy to hear that - you have no idea - but at the same time I had to wonder. What the buck? Had the evening actually turned out better for her than she’d planned? The more I thought about it - the sadder it all seemed. She never expected to get away at all.
Queenie wasn’t a dog. She knew exactly how fucked she was. Her mind was way too smart - way too pony for carefree romps through the hallways at the end of a broken leash, or mad dashes for escape. But she still couldn’t hatch a real plan. The way she’d allowed herself to be lead away at the end? She never really dreamed of what it might be like to ever get the buck out of there. She was just stealing a moment.
Maybe I’m putting words in her mouth that she wouldn’t actually say, and thoughts in her head that had never actually crossed her mind. But to me, it seemed that Queenie was stuck where she was. And all she could ever hope for was a moment of power - a tiny little protest - a song of freedom. Like I had back in Trottica.
It broke my heart and confused the hell out of me just to think about it.
“Nurse?” I said at last, disrupting our little silence.
“Yeah?”
“Why is she like that?”
Redheart just sighed. “Some ponies. Sometimes their brains just don't play by the rules.”
“Was she always like that?” I pressed the issue tenaciously the way only a child can. “I mean did she just wake up one day, and snap, and decide she was sick of being a pony or something?”
I wouldn’t blame her if she had. After mistaking the howls of a pony for an interdimensional monster traveling from the future to try and kill me, I had to wonder if before all this bomb drama was up, I might just end up barking mad myself.
“That, I can't say.” Redheart replied. “Somepony found her wandering the Everfree Forest lost and confused a couple of years ago.”
Poor thing.
“Ooh!” I exclaimed. “When can I see her again?”
Nurse Redheart took her hat off and ran her hoof through her hair. Looked away from my eyes. Not good.
“But you can't!” I squeaked.
She shoved her hoof against my mouth and shushed me. She didn’t remove it till I stopped squeaking, which was an admittedly long time.
“Mm hmmm eeeeeeeem! Ennnggggm mm mmmm mmm mnnngggh! Unnn mmmm meeemmuuu mummmm!”
“Rose,” she said at last. “You can’t just check her out of here, take her home with you, drop a water dish on the floor, and expect everything to be okay. You do understand that, sweetie, don’t you?”
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
Bleep-bleep.
“Well, when you put it like that…”
I closed my eyes. It sounded so stupid when you said it out loud. But it was also what I was kinda hoping might happen. I knew Screw Loose wasn't exactly a real dog, but I also knew that getting to live like one is what she would want most. Look at how instantly she fell in love with me. All for a kind voice and a couple of pets.
“She is a very sick pony,” said Redheart. “And there is no doctor in Equestria who’s gonna let a kid leap head first into the life of somepony who is sick like that, especially if you start telling her that she actually is a dog.”
“But--;”
Plunk. She shushed me again. Hoof in mouth and all.
When I was quiet, she leaned in real close and whispered in my ear, “But no doctor in Equestria saw what I just saw either.”
I had to jerk my head away just to get a look at her face to make sure she wasn’t teasing me. What was she getting at? Could I actually see Queenie again?!
“That mare made more progress tonight than in all the years she’s been here combined. I can’t ignore that.” Redheart shut her eyes and took a deep breath. “Just give me some time to figure this out, okay? Can you do that for me please?”
I nodded sadly.
She didn’t say anything else on the subject, but she didn’t really have to. Hospitals aren't these places that you just wander into whenever you're sick, or hurt, or something, and they whistle a little tune and take care of you, and it’s all just hunky dory. Everything is paperwork, and forms, and big fat goose-ministrators telling everypony else what to do. It’s a bunch of stupid crap that everypony hates cause it makes everypony's life more difficult - doctors, nurses, patients - everypony. But for some stupid grown-up reason, they all just keep on doing it that way anyhow.
Redheart went back to messing with my tubes and wires. Acting all casual, like we hadn’t just had a great big secret conversation about Screw Loose. It was only when she finally got out of the chair that I realized that she had actually been holding my hoof the whole time. I suddenly wished she hadn’t let go.
“It was the tape coming loose,” said Redheart all of a sudden - a bit too loud, a bit too clear.
She’d have made a lousy spy.
“You're very lucky.”
“Tape?” I said.
“That's what hurt you so much.”
“Oh,” I rubbed my hoof.
It didn’t feel like luck.
“That stuff’ll rip your flesh off,” she said, surprisingly blunt.
“You got some rest now, child. The sooner you get better, the sooner you can get out of here.”
I sighed.
“And the sooner,” Redheart brushed my mane from my face and lifted my chin, “That you and your sister can start filling out visitors forms.”
When she whispered those last two words, they hit me like a shovel to the face. I could see my dog again! Getting out of bed - getting better - suddenly became the most important thing that I could ever hope to do.
I vowed then and there never to fail Screw Loose. And if I was gonna live up to that vow, I had a lot of work to do.
* * *
Roseluck. Cliff Diver. The ponies closest to me in the whole wide world. They couldn’t get me to stop moping. Even the memory of Twinkle Eyes, armed though she was, could only smack me when I was being a jerk to myself. None of them could light a proper fire under my flank.
But I had a goal to work towards now - one that wasn’t tainted by death, or slavery, or whiny piratetry. And this grown mare. This dog. She was counting on me.
Nurse Redheart straightened out her hat, gave a final glance at the bleep-a-majig, and kissed my forehead. Totally the last thing in the world I was expecting her to do, but I needed that. I mean really needed it. I didn’t even realize how badly I'd needed a forehead kiss until she went and did it. And when it was over I looked up at her and smiled, wondering how in the world she knew.
After a long and tranquil moment of smiling right back at me, she finally turned to leave.
“Please…” I called out, holding back the tears in my eyes.
She stopped. Cocked her head in concern.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
“Please, um…” I took a deep breath, and a deep sigh. “Tell her I love her, okay?”
I felt kinda stupid for saying it, but Redheart didn't seem to think so.
“You have a good heart,” she said to me. “Just like your mother.”
* * *
I lay there for a long, long, long, long while. Just like your mother.
Nurse Redheart had taken care of Mom in her dying days. It was Redheart who’d come running when the bleep-a-majig stopped and I was left crying in my mother’s bed - Redheart who’d held me whenever Mom couldn’t.
They may not have known each other for very long, but you can get awfully close to someone in an awfully short time when they are dying. So I wondered what it was that Nurse Redheart saw in me that was worthy of my mother.
I couldn’t begin to imagine.
All my life, I thought of Mom as this perfect being. This vague memory of warmth and solace and comfort. But who was she really? What did she do all day? What did she like to talk about? What would it be like to just sit down and talk to her?
No matter how many stories Roseluck told, I would never really know. Never really understand. Because to me, Mom was a feeling. An abstract. Something as awe-inspiring and earth-shatteringly amazing as a great big starry sky. In my mind, she was a deep and perfect mystery.
The idea that I might in some way be like her?
Wow.
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...Well, that was an unexpected plot development. :D
4681974
A good one, I hope?
4682056
Oh, it seems to be. Sorry if I worried you by not being more clear.
It will be interesting what more will be done with Queenie: whether she'll effectively just be there for motivation to get better, or whether she'll have further plot relevance.
And this chapter really brought it home of how mentally resilient that Rose is, because as she said, a lesser pony could very well have cracked up after what she's gone through. I'm suddenly pondering if that IS what happened to Queenie, and that she's from the future, or a fellow Dreamer...
As a side note, you continue to produce strange, delightful imagery with your words:
4684169
Thanks for your input. I'm always interested to hear what folks take out of what they read. I'm pretty much wearing Rose-colored-glasses all the time - (get it?) - because writing the story really involves seeing events from her point of view.
So Queenie's insanity meant to me what it meant to Rose - a warning about what could happen if you lost your mind and cracked. (And of course a cuddly pet).
I'm really truly delighted to hear that you noticed what Rose has failed to recognize about herself - that she is damn strong for not cracking so far. It's the opposite side of the same coin.
4685332
No kidding; it's all that much more impressive, since Rose is just a kid. I gotta figure that she'd be in the extreme minority of kids that could handle it and not crack. Heck, I figure that most adults would crack. True, Ponyville gets it's share of disasters and monsters, but for the most part, it's idyllic. But then, to be shifted to the blasted horror of the Wasteland (and back and forth)...
Yeah, Rose is made of stern stuff.
4689939
Welcome back.
I was totally not expecting to see Screw Loose show up, totally awesome addition!
"Could I actually see my Queenie again?!"
Whoa. Whoa whoa whoa, WHOA! I am deeply unsettled but this.
I understand Rose is a kid, and that she's been through a lot, but that is not a dog she's talking about but another pony, and an incredibly sick pony at that. To imply that Screw Loose is something to be owned like a pet is incredibly demeaning. You've made it clear that Rose is a tough, smart kid but still a kid at heart, but this is not the time to let that naiveté shine. To hear her believe that another pony is anything other than another pony is proof that she's not as okay as she believes.
If you're trying to foreshadow that Screw Loose is what Rose may become, keep writing lines like this. But this could also be me reading WAY to deep into pastel equines trying to kill each other.
Otherwise I absolutely love Screw Loose's depiction. Those subtle shifts in her demeanor really seemed alive. I'm probably only reacting this way BECAUSE its so believable that she's a pony with the mind of a dog but just enough of an inkling of either what she was or what she 'should' be to make it tragic. I am greatly interested to see more of her and somehow see if that 'should be' gets changed to a 'could be'. But that sounds like an entirely different fic all in itself.
Well done sir, well done.
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I'm not an "I only write fanfic" person, nor am I an aspiring professional writer type. I have written a few things here and there over the years, but none of it is on the Internet, and all of it was crap. I didn't even begin to "find my voice" until I started exploring the inside of Rose Petal's brain.
Something just sort of clicked.
It's been a path of discovery for me. I think I'm getting better at it as I go, and maybe one day, I'll write a "real book," or something. But for right now, this is where my heart is, and if you're looking for a portfolio of my accomplishments as a writer, Hooves of Fate is pretty much it.
I pretty much just write what my own brain hornets tell me to anyway, and I'm in it for the roller coaster ride.
If you're hungry for good fiction go to http://www.joerlansdale.com He is an accomplished, but lesser known author. (He wrote the short story that Bubba Ho Tep was based on, a few of the better episodes of Batman the Animated Series, and one of his early novels Cold in July just got made into an indie movie that got released a few weeks ago). His website features a different one of his short stories every week.
I swore she was about to be plunged back into the Wastelnad, but no, it was a false alarm. And Screw Loose huh? Interesting to see you bringing her into the tale. I never really ready to many stories with her as a character. Actually, this might be the first. So I'm excited where you take her. Perhaps even Rose can help her in becoming a pony again. Brony Joe is right and that Rose really shouldn't be possessive over Queenie, not so soon at least. It was startling and upsetting, but at the same time nothing like a dog to really bring a child back around. I do like the idea of Rose making it her goal now to be there for someone in her world, knowing desperately that someone needs her.
This chapter was a step back for her innocents and the one thing that truly brought Rose out of her depression. I like how you're focused on her child aspects along with how intelligent and thinkiness Rose is. It all comes together into a wonderful little clumsy brat. Not only will we be watching a character grow and expand in this truly fantastic tale, we'll also watch her grow up and mature. I only wish there were more updates so I can maybe even think of her character growing out of fillyhood and into teenagerhood.
I bid you well and good luck with the writing into the future. You've truly caught my attention and I've fallen in love with your characters. I eagerly await the next installment. :)
Quaver Ava
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It's a giant emotional mess for Rose. Queenie has decided that she is Rose Petal's dog, and placed a huge responsibility at her hooves, and Rose is processing what happened the only way she knows how.
There's still a lot to sort out in the chapters to come, and it is my hope that watching their relationship unfold will provoke questions as well as answers.
4696119 Hahaha, Alright I get ya completely. For a while that's all I had as well, just a bunch of fanfiction. Never really stuck with any one story and seem to still not be able to finish stuff, so that's kind of why I ain't got a book of my own yet written... But as for the good fiction, I appraciate the offer but I must pass it up. Got a lot of reading to catch up on and I'm no where's close to finished. I was more interested in seeing more of your stuff cause. :)
Have a nice day. Strangely comment replies aren't popping up in my message box, and I have to hunt down the stories I commented on to see if anyone replied to my reviews... :/
Quaver Ava
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Well if you're interested in my stuff specifically, I don't have any fic to show off, but I do have a buck ton of music, and I do like to tell stories with music.
Insert shameless self promotion here.
http://www.youtube.com/user/sdoggingsworth
:)
4706625 Oh yay! :D
Geez this makes me want a Queenie! She's so lovable!
So she was in the Everfree Forest when they found her, huh? I wonder if she is by chance not even actually a pony at all? Like maybe a dog that wandered through some poison joke and was turned into a pony. I guess that sounds too easy even if it would be kinda interesting but for some reason that was the instant place my mind went when I heard she was found in Everfree.
If Queenie had been found alone in the Everfree, if she didn't have any sort of identification either, the name Screw Loose suddenly seems much more... mean-spirited I guess.
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I seldom do edits like this, but I went back and softened some of the language a bit. Just a sentence or two here and there. It made a big difference, in my opinion.
The dog sentiment is still there, but it's a little less possessive.
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It would be kinda mean for your Mom to name you that at birth too.
At least with the hospital, it was an educated guess based on the cutie mark. 
Okay nice quick one. Rose is starting to come to terms with her lose, with being back, and staring to work out how to deal with her pain. But still rather overwhelmed by it.
Ummmm, okay..... I really have no clue what to say here. Don't really care or know much about music.
And one rather major mystery about what the hell is going on. Is it symbolic of how "fate" sees the ponies it send on these mission as it's dogs? It's pets/servants? Obedient to it's will? Or, is it something else? It's a big mystery, and yet nothing to really base guesses on. And why does she hear them? If she's hearing them now, does that mean she's going back when she falls asleep? Never did get an answer to if her body is still there while she's in another time.
You know, besides the back hoof.
From when you tripped and bit his tail then out of nowhere commented on the taste of his ass. It was the only thing in your mouth and the only hair you pulled out. And, that is a really REALLY good question.
So how long till she starts calling it 'her precious'?
Given how man points you seem to have in perception, you are pretty unobservant at times. Then again not in the best of shape to figure these things out right now. But seems clear it wasn't so much the war, as the fact it was against the zebras that is hitting her hard.
Okay, this is oddly done. The fact that we left off with her hearing the barking in the last chapter. Then got a bit of he talking about it. But then a good chunk of actual story without a mention, only for it now to appear like she is just hearing it, rather then having heard it at the end of the last chapter. Just, hard to parse what is going on with the barking here.
Secondly, given that it's after A Canterlot Wedding, we know it's not RD committing Grand Theft Slipper. But still, likely a real dog... or Screw Loose.
.......... What the... why? That..That is one of the most awesome ways to describe something like that possible, just because of how insane it sounds in and of itself. It makes so little sense, it's perfect.
At once both odd, weird, and just not to rationale for her to be this obsessed over it. And going to this lengths, and being so sure something is coming just to steal the hair. BUT, it also makes sense. She's really not in a perfectly rational state right now, and that hair, despite it being, well, just a hair, it is all those things she saw in it. A link to what happened. Proof, at least to herself, that is did occur. And the only reminder of her friends from Trottica she's likely to ever have.
And she still wants to help, NEEDS to help, can't just sit by and let other ponies be in danger without doing something to help them, even if she has no idea what she could do. She simply cannot sit around and not try to save ponies that needs it. Even still. Don't lose the trait Rose. Though maybe add a little bit of a delay while you work out how best to help rather then rush in blindly.
Then again.. though doubt she'd actually feel the same if it was really happening, more and ideal thought.
She reads some awesome books.
First. Again great naming Rose. And yeah wasn't likely it was ever some weird, supernatural threat. okay this IS Equestria, so it could be, but not one connected to her.. Second. So, it really was frostbite caused by the cold, and the blackness is some sort of by product, some sort of other effect. But how? Why? Is it permanent? just till she confronts The Shadow and wins? till she's is no longer an agent of fate?
Gandalf Stormcrow. And, very good observation. Just because something only shows up to bring bad news, or when something bad is happening, doesn't mean they cause it, they could be a warning, trying to alert you to something bad on the way. Or just something that has no interest in you, isn't in league with the 'evil' but simply for some reason hangs around it. like remora's on sharks.
Or, it is simply a regular dog.
Something that I'm sure she'll be saying quite a lot. Or.... she's about to drown in happy puppy slobber.
Time for a
? Ehhh kind of saw that coming.
So this takes place between A Canterlot Wedding, and Just For Sidekicks/Games Ponies Play.
AH! That makes sense. Was rather odd they were all being so shocked and scared and 'Don't move" and what not given how friendly Screw Loose seemed. Like they were afraid she would attack or something. but, just afraid of her accidentally hitting the wrong thing.. makes sense. Though also brings to mind the question of why she listened so well to Rose, but the nurses were having such a hard time catching her.
Unless it was this, she was just having some fun and playing with the nurses.
you know... I did kind of like him... till this point. Yeah......... asshole.
Double for you.
Bananas... you're still on my "like" list, but don't push your luck!
Really REALLY want to know more about her. Rose is right, she is rather odd. being as old as she is, yet acting closer to Roses age, but with a certain twist of being older therefore wiser and smarter and what not. Not to an adult condescending to a kid degree but still like an older kid to a younger one. While still acting more like a younger one. Just how long as she been in that bubble?
Again with the 'dog'. Not good Rose. I get why, and if Queenie things of her self as one, responds to it, but still, bad reinforcement of it. Would have been better to say 'good girl'.
Hmmmmm, yeah not quite liking this. I do see some of why Rose is thinking this way but.. still not good.
Yeah... little bit to much of the Wastes bleeding into her....
Typo!
That's not entirely what happened and you know it Rose. Not all of them did. And you saw that those that did get dropped ended up being picked up by other foals. Or at least others tried to. And given that you dropped both of yours, same thing. Not an intentional 'Screw this you're on our own." but just unable to hold onto hem in the rush. AND, keep in mind, you only came across one other drug-o during your own escape after the herd stampeded over you, so the rest were still carried to safety.
Agree with the that type being worse bit. not so much on why she's seeing the nurse as one of them. Yeah he's not exactly a paragon of ultimate pony ideals and physical embodiment of all the Virtues of Harmony, but hardly that bad.
Ah right.. he's the one that 'teased' her... forot about that. Okay maybe.. depends on just what he did and why.......
There is a WHOLE lot going on here, but so much of it is behind the scenes, is things that Rose doesn't know about, and yet, you can tell are there. First, GREAT storytelling and writing being able to do that, to make the world that much more alive, to make it clear there is a while world beyond just what the main character is seeing. Second, means I really have no idea what to sa yabout what was happening because i can tell there is a lot I don't know.
Well, if she wasn't trying to escape, just have some fun, have a little play time? And yeah her referring to her as a dog first, and only as a pony as an after thought..... still not something I'm really liking.
Okay, but why? I mean get why Rose needs to be quite, but why lie? And keep ALL the other nurses that were involved quite as well? Really, what is going on here?
Go Redheart!
Don't make me retract that earlier 'Go Redheart!"
Yes Rose did clearly some how reach her, and having her help, talk to her, visit her, it might help. But it needs to be with the understanding they are trying to HELP her, to bring her out of the delusion, not simply play into it.
Because, on the whole, those rules, and that order is rather needed. Unless those running it and following hose rules get to blinded by following the rules and the paperwork and so for it's own sake, rather then following WHY they are there.
D'awwwwwwww
Ohhh boy.. she was just starting o be happy and... okay this could be very good, or very bad.
ok really good. So, yay that.
Alright short simple chapter. Annnnd, yeah.. good overall, but really did not like how Rose was treating Screw Loose. Well some of it. Some of it was great and really, I can see why Screw Loose responded so well. But the whole, "My dog" thing, and treating her like a dog, an animal.. yeah not good.. at all. okay that is 'not good' from an in universe perspective, not good for Rose Petal the pony to be doing. NOT bad from an out of universe, Rose Petal the Character perspective. And it's clear why she is.
This, it give he hope, something she can do right, without killing anypony, without hurting anypony. That need for something good, something right. She WANTS Screw loose to be Queenie. To be her dog, he pet. Need her, love her, be loyal to her, and above all, be helped by her. For Rose to be able to make her happy. And, being a pony, that happynies, that joy, it's has far more of an impact then if she really was just a dog.
BUT, it's also wrong. yes she wants to help her, but for the wrong reason. She doesn't want to help Screw Loose to make her healthy, to break her out of insanity, to heal her mind. She wants to help her, so she can feel good about helping her. There's a pretty selfish undertone to this. "My dog." after all. At some level, she's seeing Queenie as simply an object, a means to an end. Not as another pony. BUT, it's not overt, it's not conscious, it's just, there in the back of her mind, influencing her. She does care for her. Does want her to be happy. But, isn't seeing what NEEDS to be done. Isn't thinking about curing her, helping her recover, only helping her be happy while still insane, still acting like a dog.
But again the why, is obvious and does make sense. So yes, while I'm glad Rose is happy. And I do think she can end up helping Screw Loose. (After all we know she likely does get better.) Her attitude is just wrong, she's making her happy, but not REALLY helping her. Just feeding into her delusion. And I really do not like her looking at Screw Loose as just a dog. Seeing her as a pet, and object, something to be loved and cared for, but not as a pony. Not as their own person, as a sick pony that needs help. Just a sad dog that needs a friend and owner. YET that is fully on Rose Petal the pony, and all of that disappointment and "BAD ROSE!" is confined to her actions in story, to what she is doing and why, not towards the character or the story for going that way, it makes sense, and i'm interested to see where it goes.
Wow!
It's been a while since I read the previous chapter of The Hooves of Fate. (Silly real life got busy, and before I knew it, months had gone by.
) So before reading this chapter, I re-read the last one. And it was every bit as amazing as I remembered it. I think it was even better the second time.
I'm so glad there are more chapters ahead to read. Returning to reading The Hooves of Fate, I've found it is like embracing an old and dear friend. I'm very much looking forward to reading every chapter of this story.
This chapter was quite unexpected. This is a short chapter. But it is beautiful, both in the way that it tugs on the heartstrings and how it changes Rose Petal's immediate goals and self-perception. This chapter gives Rose Petal a well-timed and deserved boost to her self-image and demeanor.
I also really like the dissonance created by the simultaneous positive and negative values of treating Screw Loose like a dog. Rose approaches the situation with a mature attitude but childlike perspective. Nurse Redheart gently but firmly brings Rose the adult moral view. But even from an adult perspective, it's impossible to ignore the immediate good caused by treating Screw Loose as she wants to be treated, and perhaps at some level needs to be.
Screw Loose is a very sick pony. There is an impulse to help her heal and become normal; yet there is also one to comfort and give her what will make her happy and content. And when those two are mutually exclusive, it is difficult to chose which is best. Would it be selfish for Rose to keep Screw Loose as a pet, preventing her from actually getting better? Or is it selfish to make Screw Loose constantly miserable in an effort to "fix" her so that she conforms to accepted social behavior? (The answer may be an obvious "yes" to the first and "no" to the second. But we have far too long and ugly a history of horrific treatment of the mentally ill in the name of healing, and of trying to "cure" people of qualities we dislike. So it's a worthy discussion to have.)
And this is Equestria, so how sure can we be that a pony found walking around the Everfree acting like a dog isn't actually a poor dog who sniffed the wrong blue flower?
Thank you for this story.
Poor Banana Foster. She has all the makings of a great Steel Ranger. ...A ridiculous food-based name.
Why am I not in bed yet?
...Wait, this barking wouldn't happen to be Screw Loose, would it? Hehe. Called it.
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This goes over my own feelings pretty well, besides the fact I haven't done rereading of anything yet. If I read as much as I wanted to these days, maybe...
Anyway, I enjoyed this chapter just as much or more so than the previous. I mean, previous has that thing that happens, but this here has a wider swath of stuff for me to enjoy. I'm really glad to see this turning point for Rose: it's obvious and self-evident that she needed it. And indeed, the Screw Loose matter is complicated... And at the same time, I love seeing such a minor character shown some love attention. Just like certain Iron Will and Sapphire Shores appearances I've read... (I adore those two and their potential)
...Anyway, I also learned what bananas foster are, and I want to try some so bad. Plus the character interests me.
I can safely say the story certainly isn't getting any less good.
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I'm 3 years late but oh well. I wanted to hopefully clarify the Daft Punk thing a little. In music everything follows a rhythm, this is the sole basis of every piece and it's magical. What I believe they are saying is that the present is without rhythm so it cannot be experienced The same as the future or past. But if you look to the future you can be excited or in fear, same for the past although fear is replaced with regret. Time is a hard thing to hold, everything you do is instantly in the past. Everything you wil do, has not happened so it can't be explainedwith words, sometimes music can do everything that words can and more; sometimes it expresses feeling. Things done in the past can have a feeling or a rhythm to it because it is known. Take that as you will, it's really my opinion but I figure clarification is helpful? (Really it has little to do with music, if you didn't get that from my spiel)
When it comes to philosophy I am not the person to ask, this is just my take on itSincerely,
A rather philosophical Yogi
Hm, you know, that's a thought. I wonder if her wasteland travels and/or her visits with the nightmarish shadow monster would constitute as dreams that Luna could enter.