4918983 Yup its still updating. I am writing this story as I have time. Bloodbound has priority, as does my work. But Hivemind is still worked on as fast as I can. and I think I am half way though the next chapter
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." *salutes the american flag*
4648606 Child, heed these words and strengthen thy resolve: "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."
So when I saw the authors notice at the beginning did I not think that it would be that bad, the other chapters being pretty nice... but boy do you have a lot of missing double lines and troubles with periods in this one, the ones that I have noticed being commented on below.
In general should you remember that what you upload reflect your quality. So always spend a bit of time to pre-read and polish as much as you can since you only have one first impression when a person read a new chapter, and while the story is fine am I not that impressed with how it is presented.
Nitpicks: "and a safe return to their homeland.... if they so wish" Sentences always start with capital letters, and you have 4 periods in that ellipse.
"“We.... is Hero?”" 4 periods again
" She noticed in the wall gaping holes with bare electrical wires dangling uselessly." You lack a period in front of this sentence, and feels like the sentence is also lacking a word somewhere
"It was not fear mixed with hate" Missing a space in front of this sentence.
"As she petted him she gave a low rumbling churr from her throat." Someone stole your period yet again.
Somehow, it being so vague makes it sadder.
Now this is a story I haven't seen update... In a long time.
Your alive? Your alive!
What the ... I'm completly lost
4648737 I'll get the booze!
4652664 wooo!!
4648737 *You're
Also, BOO-YAH!!! Update, baby!
yay, words!
Hope there's no hiatus. I enjoy reading this fic. Got a soft spot for changelings.
4691606 No hiatus, just takes me a lont time to write with the other things I also do (work etc) but the next chapter is way underway.
Are you still updating this? This is a very unique story idea and it would be a shame if you discontinued this.
4918983 Yup its still updating. I am writing this story as I have time. Bloodbound has priority, as does my work. But Hivemind is still worked on as fast as I can. and I think I am half way though the next chapter
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." *salutes the american flag*
4648606 Child, heed these words and strengthen thy resolve: "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."
A howling changeling? I cant see it.
8322885
I hope not, it's a story
So when I saw the authors notice at the beginning did I not think that it would be that bad, the other chapters being pretty nice... but boy do you have a lot of missing double lines and troubles with periods in this one, the ones that I have noticed being commented on below.
In general should you remember that what you upload reflect your quality. So always spend a bit of time to pre-read and polish as much as you can since you only have one first impression when a person read a new chapter, and while the story is fine am I not that impressed with how it is presented.
Nitpicks:
"and a safe return to their homeland.... if they so wish" Sentences always start with capital letters, and you have 4 periods in that ellipse.
"“We.... is Hero?”" 4 periods again
" She noticed in the wall gaping holes with bare electrical wires dangling uselessly." You lack a period in front of this sentence, and feels like the sentence is also lacking a word somewhere
"It was not fear mixed with hate" Missing a space in front of this sentence.
"As she petted him she gave a low rumbling churr from her throat." Someone stole your period yet again.