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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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My theory is that Project Horizons, once activated, will drop the moon onto the Core. The moon will then react with the massive amount of Starmetal down there (whatever that thing is called) and destroy most of the planet. I imagine this was done as a sort of last resort, if Equestria was going to completely lose; a sort of "if I can't have it, no one can."
3582605 Hahaha! I would not be surprised if that was the case. I gave up with PH at chapter 43, I know how you feel.
Isnt it amazing how good fics just pass you by sometimes? I didn't even know this was here. Downloading the lot now, looks like I got a new story to delve into Keep up the good work!
3583038 Thank you! Its been a while since I read MoP but I only have C12 to read then I am up to date!
This story looks fairly interesting.....I shall give it a shot!
seems like the 2299 site has got everyone craving FoE fics
Edit: Seems good! Time to binge read 9 chapters
3582605 Wow dude. That's dark even for Blackjack I doubt Sethisto would just whole sale nostril fuck the work Littlepip accomplished in OG FoE
Another great chapter! Tho I noticed an error when the girls were setting up the tent; Foxglove follows herself into the tent.
Also Foxglove's crush on Seafire is cute ^^
3583950 Thanks for the heads up, its amended. Though, that you only found 1 major mistake is a miracle! And what makes you think Foxglove has a crush on Seafire?
Well it looks like Foxglove has gotten into trouble again but at least they know who has their friends now, good chapter again
3586198 Nothing is as it seems Glad you enjoyed it!
3582608 There's only a few more chapters left in FoE:PH (it is up to 62 chapters currently), I still find it to be an amazing story. I mean it can take gore to a whole new level sometimes, but I enjoy it. Anyway, I am curious, what made you stop reading it?
You have a bit of a bump in your plot... When the group returned to viewpoint, they didn't let Clef and Stave know what happened to everyone from the sable. So, what was the deal with that?
3588149 I will be honest, I totally forgot about them. I was very much focused on the others that they just never entered my mind. Looks like I have some work to do.
As for PH, it went from realistic to plausible then out to unlikely and then on to just plain stupid. I stopped when they were in the prison with the megaspell. No one would go anywhere near that thing, nor hang around in the fire. She survived so many things that should have killed her. Also there is no way that you would be able to fit 4 new legs with that technology in post-war Equestria. I see the end of part two, where she dies, as the end now. It just went to far.
Very quick thing before I've finished, I'll come back and edit it later with more, but I noticed it switched between first and third person in the tent.
Now the tent is getting really confusing. Did the first person perspective change to Foxglove without being mentioned? I've completely lost track of what's going on.
3622269 The perspective switches to Foxglove at the * * * division. I have re-read it twice and not spotted any 3rd person talk. There are sections where Foxglove is just observing the others and thus doesn't say much which might explain it. Pin it down for me and I will see what I can do.
3625854
After realizing the perspective has shifted there isn't any third person talk.
However switching perspective in the middle of a chapter is extremely disorienting, especially when it goes unannounced as to where it's gone.
Stories which change perspective without overtly telling tend to start doing it much earlier in the story and having the first paragraph telling the reader who it has switched to through numerous cues. Others, like the Animorphs books, have the name of the person they've switched perspective to, in order to make it very clear.
Otherwise it was a really good chapter with some world building, decent character development and the description of the general dilapidation of the wasteland were great. The fight with the raiders from Foxglove was tense and well handled.
3628175 The switch was defined by the different kind of break and I did try to clear up who it had changed to within a paragraph or two. I will see if I can find a better way to do a switch in later chapters.
This chapter was originally all from Fran's perspective but it just didn't work right beyond about half way as I couldn't seem to get across the... emotions? feelings? in the right way.
Maybe I will stick to whole chapters from now on, like C7. I am glad you liked the fight, that was written in one move, I haven't had such a rush of words in months, and it barely needed editing! I will be lucky if it happens again.
3895625 Thanks Got to ask though... "Also, Fran, your boss wants to see you in his office." the cover art or a euphemism?
3899808 What is worse is only last week did I discover that Ambrosia is a brand of ready made custard But I am glad you are enjoying it, I feel my descriptions lack most of the time but perhaps its better than I think.
U need to mark POV changes. I'm getting a little confused.