So ends the first story... · 3:48am Oct 7th, 2012
Well, here we are. Six months ago to the day, I published the first chapter of Make a Wish. It was my first real fanfiction undertaking, aside from a failure from before I had familiarized myself with what was horribly cliche in the fandom (it's still sitting around here somewhere if you want to look at it and laugh. Just don't expect me to ever touch it again). The response I received for it was entirely positive and unexpected, which inspired me to submit it to Equestria Daily. After one quick round of edits, it was accepted and posted up there.
Now the story is finished. I'm really proud of my work, but I know that in the end what I think about it doesn't matter. What everyone else thinks about it does. So, that's what I'd like to hear from you guys. I have comments on the individual chapters themselves, but they tend to be short and only pertaining to the chapter at hand. In the comments on this post, I'd like to hear your complete thoughts on the story as a whole. What you liked, what you didn't like, what you found funny, what you wish had been explored more, etc. Spare me no criticism, as I want complete honesty with my flaws. If I want to grow as a writer, I need to hear what I did right and what I did wrong so I can emphasize one and fix the other in my future works. Thanks a lot in advance!
Perpetual Lurker
Well I love every bit of the story good work
The story was good. Good enough for a sequal (If an idea could be thought of. An example being: Some other entity from another universe coming and causing havoc. Rough idea, would take refining). I really did like this. I thought, originally, "Oh, come on. I've seen this kind of thing before. Scoots and Dash sisters, or close enough to be called sisters, and Dash helps Scoots come over some problem." I'm glad I was proven wrong in this. I've seen the basic concept, yes, but the overall idea of the story I've never seen, personally. Really great work, keep it up.
Hmm... Overall, I'd have to say that the only things I disliked were the occasional grammatical or spelling errors, and those are easy enough to fix. I liked the overarching concept, and I like how you flushed out the back-story of the comet, and I really liked the other Scootaloo (I kinda saw it coming, but it was still an enjoyable twist). And a sequel (if you can come up with a workable idea) would be awesome, but that's up to you.
If this were DeviantArt, I'd give you a llama for this story, but it's not, so have a mustache instead
I deeply enjoyed the whole story and I'm hoping for some later stuff of how Alicorn Scootaloo is settling in.
Made an account for fimfiction now, should have done it earlier.
As was said, the grammar errors were sometimes distracting so in your future works you should try to minimize them.
And otherwise, I can't really give substantial criticism, I'm afraid.. I have mixed feelings. The story first appeared a bit lackluster for me, it never was clear where you were going with it (not that that's a bad thing, it's probably even a good thing), then it became better and the Finale even "touched" me. I don't really know how to express my thoughts.. It's just that, when I read other sad fanfics, I try to feel into the story and feel sad while reading, but I couldn't manage to do it very much with your story.
Sorry again for posting this gibberish. I wish I could give you better feedback. In any case I really liked your story, maybe I will try to look out for your future stories (if you make them).