Visiden Tries It: Project Horizons Chapter 6 · 2:50pm Jun 24th, 2016
I was going to post sooner, but I spent a good chunk of my free time being antsy and following the Brexit news. Which is kind of stupid given that I'm all the way here in the Philippines and I'll likely never set foot in the UK. I guess it's just a compelling story to follow.
Here we go, Chapter 6. Let's see what this story's got.
I wasn’t going to discard a single bullet or bit of loot that might contribute to our ten-thousand-cap goal, though, and with P-21’s injured leg and Glory’s lack of pockets, I was left slogging through knee-deep mud while they trotted ahead.
I'm convinced that anyone writing a Fallout story should play in Survival mode, so they can get a feel of what being in a harsh environment is actually like and have to work with stricter weight management. They don't have to beat it. Just get a feel of it.
Then I saw a unicorn inside the trailer who had to be the pony in charge. Charisma and charm seemed to drip from his ivory hide and cobalt mane, and he gave the impression of illuminating the dim interior of the rusty trailer. His smile made my knees feel like I’d just glanced up at the sky. “Greetings. I am Prince Splendid.” You bet you are! “I’m glad somepony responded to my requests in a prompt manner. Would you care for some refreshment?”
Horseshit. This guy doesn't look like a shotgun. I doubt he'd get Blackjack hot and bothered.
Prince Splendid was a gracious host, but there was way too much awkwardness. I had to admit, I was impressed by what I saw; his ponies were better armed and equipped than most. He had fresh food; that was a miracle in and of itself. It was simply the fact that the Society seemed to believe it had some inherent right to rule. Even if he got this super cure for his father, who would it help besides ponies who already had so much?
Yeah, fuck his dying father, and fuck professionalism. He's a snob, and they can all die.
I’m here to talk. If I can work out a deal where nopony gets killed, even better,” I said truthfully. “My name’s Blackjack.” Incomprehension. I sighed and added, “Security?” Comprehension dawned and they started to relax a little. Urgh… as much as I hated to admit it, that little title of DJ Pon3’s was making my life easier.
Oh shit, you're the Security Mare? Well, come right in, armed stranger who came from the direction of the camp of someone trying to get rid of me. No need to prove your identity, I trust you implicitly.
Damn, my mane was itching like crazy.
A little Head and Shoulders should help with that. Or not walking into ominous situations that require foreshadowing.
In the center of the fountain rose the bronze statue of a pegasus pony, one hoof around the shoulders of a young unicorn filly, the other stroking the mane of an earth pony colt. On her shoulder perched an elegant bird. At her hooves, a small rabbit seemed to glare rather insolently out with his forelegs crossed. A plaque at the base of the statue read, ‘We Must Do Better’. Looking at the pegasus’s gentle smile, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the statue wept for all the decay around her.
You know, I'm always wary of politicians who like to pose with children. Blackjack waxing poetic here. Weeping for the decay around her indeed.
Fluttershy. She was a ministry mare, and a friend of Rainbow Dash. She founded the Ministry of Peace and dedicated herself to helping the ponies of Equestria throughout the war.” Morning Glory looked wistful as well as she looked up at her. “As the war progressed it took its toll on her. Some claim she aided the enemy, despite orders to the contrary, and gave zebras medical supplies and other care. At the end... well… I was taught she went mad with grief and wandered out into the Wasteland to die. She simply couldn’t live with having failed Equestria.”
I stared at the bronze statue a moment longer. “If she failed, I can’t believe it was for lack of trying,” I said softly as we headed towards the stairs. Morning Glory, however, examined the remaining elevator curiously. “Something wrong?”
Aww, she was so immaculate that she aided allies and enemies alike. And then she presumably died of grief because she wasn't messianic enough for Equestria. What a martyr. Someone build a temple to her. And Blackjack just knows that Fluttershy gave it her all. Based on the appearance of a statue. Because beautiful people are good. Hold on while I vomit.
What the hay is going on here?” I muttered softly. I suddenly found myself longing for Pony Joe’s. “Give me bodies… or something shooting at me… or something. Not freaky pictures and words written in dark paint.” I glanced back and saw both of them staring at me. “What?”
“She doesn’t know?” Glory whimpered to P-21.
“Apparently not,” P-21 said as he looked behind us.
“Know what?”
Glory swallowed. “That isn’t paint, Blackjack.” She pointed at the black-red letters on the wall.
Makes sense. Blackjack has never seen blood on concrete before.
Then we heard a soft ‘thump, thump, thump, thump’ in the hallway ahead of us. A bright red ball bounced down the dimly lit hall towards the three of us. No… not a ball. It was too irregular for that. It rolled to a stop at my feet, leaving bright wet splotches on the floor.
I don't think severed heads bounce. Probably not even Pinkie Pie's. I suspect that if you hurled a severed head to the ground, it will just go splat and maybe roll slightly.
We encountered a box in the hall, a large metal cube with small pink hearts painted on each side. I couldn’t explain why, but I had the strangest fondness for the box.
Too many somehows in this story. "Somehow" you had to open that box, just as you "somehow" knew how wonderful Fluttershy was. "Somehow" can be useful if used sparingly. Sometimes the character doesn't know how something happened, but this is best utilized if the somehow is later explained. Maybe this box had some kind of mind compulsion weaved into it that made you want to fuck around with it. Otherwise, repeated use of this is symptomatic of copping out. "Somehow" is replaced with "because the plot said so".
When the note hit ‘pop’, the metal top snapped open, and out flew a pony. No… half a pony. The skinned front half bounced back and forth on a heavy metal spring, front hooves crossed as if hugging itself. Bony wings flopped around behind it.
This corpse should stink. I've noticed that none of the dead bodies in this chapter has any smell.
Sick fu-- wait... not sick enough. “Run!” I yelled as I grabbed P-21 with my magic and scooped Glory up as I bolted down the hall. A few seconds later the bombs hidden inside the box exploded. The three of us landed in a heap.
This should have more to it. They're indoors. Explosions should be deafening. Where's the bits of broken box and pulverized concrete? How about those chunks of dead pegasus raining upon them?
A means of preserving injured or sick ponies. “This is it,” I said in excitement. “If Splendid can bring his father here, they can keep him alive till the Collegiate makes a cure. Heee! I love it when a plan comes together!”
"Either I’m incompetent or I’m cursed. Either way, you’re better off without me,”
Could be cursed with incompetence.
"You put one shell in! You take another one out!” I shouted as I blasted another bunny camera. “You load another shell in and you blast it all about! You do the pony pokey and take the fuckers out. That’s what it’s all about!”
There are people who find Dark ponyfics contemptible. I disagree, obviously, but lines like this make me sympathize just a bit.
I noticed a sound file loaded on the terminal. Why not? I hit the playback as I prepared my clips. At least it would give me something to do.
Because you're evading enemies and the sound might draw them to you? No? Not a problem? Okay.
I stood and looked at some of the pictures hanging askew on the wall. Fluttershy looking rather terrified on a stage in a weird dress; goddesses, she looked adorable!
Hold on, I have to vomit again.
Bad pony!” they cried as I used S.A.T.S. and dumb luck to chew my way through them. I paused only long enough to smash in their heads with the baton, just to make sure they didn’t start moving again.
Thrilling fight scene.
Then the door opened and all the talking stopped. I’d seen her cast in bronze; now I was seeing her in flesh. The yellow pegasus may have been smaller and less dramatic than her statuary counterpart, but as I watched I couldn’t shake the grace and beauty and aura of kindness that seemed to radiate off her. She greeted everypony by name, shook hooves, and talked with clear sincerity and interest. Just touching her hoof made me feel special, and it wasn’t even me!
Bleeaaargh.
You’ve tested them on animals and adults. These are children, Fluttershy. Three months being trapped in your own body might be tough for an adult who understands what’s going on, but what about a child? They want to run and play and talk. They can’t simply be locked up for weeks on end. Fluttershy, it’s cruel!”
Then Fluttershy spoke in a soft and gentle voice, “Are you saying I should leave children to die when I have a way to keep them safe and alive until they can be healed?” At that instant I knew that Cheerilee was screwed.
Oh fuck the children. Whenever there's drama needed just throw in some dead or dying children. As if Fluttershy isn't emotionally manipulative by herself.
Somepony, I suspected Redheart, had cut the connection between the repair bots and the facility maneframe. They’d sat here alone, incapable of any interaction at all. Unable to sleep. They couldn’t even kill themselves. Then the Enclave arrived and connected the maneframe again. The children had resumed their games, honed after decades of being trapped within themselves.
Reminds me a bit of Old World Blues. It's an interesting take and the whole chapter's horror themes is refreshing. It just needs more atmosphere. And less Fluttershy.
Right now, she was a more welcome sight than Splendid stepping out of a hot shower.
Or a shotgun coming out of a shower. Just think about it. Long, glistening, ported barrel with a perky muzzle brake. A stout, shiny drum magazine full of shells just ready to blow, and a marksman's full stock, sturdy and thick. You know you like that better.
A hot, wet slipperiness moved out of me
The explosion was barely equivalent to a grenade, but it did the job. The cable snapped once more as I was showered with shrapnel.
None of which apparently cut her.
I wanted to heal your leg,” I muttered softly.
“Why? You didn’t break it.”
Because you should only want to ease suffering that you caused.
I sighed as I climbed off the bed, looking at the burned out talisman and feeling as if it’d been wasted on me. “I thought if I healed your leg I’d stop reminding you of 99. Then maybe we could be friends.”
He arched a brow and smiled, shaking his head. “Ever think it’s not about you, Blackjack?” I blinked stupidly at him and he sighed softly. “Guess not. Come on. We’ve got one last thing to deal with.” He started back out the door. “And it’s going to suck. It’s going to suck a lot.”
This guy is the real hero of this story. That is laser-precise, razor-sharp, bullshit-slaying right there.
And then they kill some deranged kids. Boo hoo. To be fair, I do really like the lullaby part of the scene.
It was a figurine of Fluttershy. Her soulful blue eyes looked up at me as she hugged a disgruntled white rabbit beneath her hooves. So gentle. So forgiving. ‘Be Kind’ was written on the base. Her head was cocked just so, as if she knew I desperately needed to talk to her.
Bleeaaargh.
At least soulful was used right.
New Perk: Foal at Heart - This perk greatly improves your interactions with children.
Well, they do substitute foal for fool so it kind of fits.
Yeah, the change of atmosphere's kind of nice. I like the idea of their enemies, certainly a step up from raiders. There was more tension for this chapter, not just another monty haul. I think I'm done here though.
They do say that chapter 6 is where it gets good. Personally, I didn't find the preceding chapters all that bad, but then again, maybe I just had lower standards back when I first read PH. Either way, I read it all the way to the end, and for all its faults, I liked it a lot. But it's not for everyone, that's for damn sure.
You'll note later that Blackjack being outright stupid is supposed to be part of her "charm" to other characters and her bullshit becomes almost impossible to slay.
It was the Companion Cube. Because fuck this story.
I was enthralled from the get go. Sucks that you didn't enjoy it friend. Hopefully you find something more palatable for your tastes.
Shame you didn't like it, but then again this kind you have to stomach a lot. Not to mention how long it is.