Mask of the Mysterious Mare Do Well. · 12:38am Jul 26th, 2012
Pluto is, as far as anypony knows, a regular pegasus. Sure she's never seen without her trusty trademark hat, but overall she's a good kid. Gets good grades in school, hangs out with her friends, and keeps a closely guarded secret.
Despite both her parents being pegusai, Pluto was a once-in-a-million rare mutation, where she was born a full-blooded Alicorn. For fear of their daughter being taken away from this, this fact was hurridly sealed. Her horn is hidden by her specially-designed hat, and she's been given warning not to practice her magic, though this doesn't dissuade her from giving it a try every now and then.
Like most other colts and fillies, she was a big fan of the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well when they first appeared. Wowed by their deeds and tales of their multiple powers, she looked up to them as a major idol. Which was why it was a big letdown when they just as suddenly revealed themselves as not one pony, but several. A chance finding of a mask in the ally however, brought a thought to her mind. A pony who could both fly, AND do magic... would almost certainly have to be an Alicorn...
Fast forward ten years later. Pluto Star is an ace reporter of the Foal Free Press, in a slightly-more-built-up Ponyville. Teamed up with her photographer friend Featherweight Snapp, she's never seen without her reporter's hat, a pair of glasses, and her trusty notepad and pencil. However, crime has begun popping up in places around town. Not to mention with all the new construction, accidents have been on the rise. Whenever these events happen, Pluto can be seen ducking into a nearby allyway, taking her hat off and turning it inside-out...
Scant seconds later, a pony is rescued. A ruffian is captured. A day is saved. By one pony that everypony thought had abandoned them, a pony clad in dark purple, with a dark mask over their face. Capable of magic, flight, and feats of amazement, Ponyville will always be grateful to the one hero, known only as, the Mysterious Mare Do well.
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Story concept. Thoughts?
Edit P.S. Pluto is not an OC.
YES
I like it. Seems a bit hard to hide the Alicorn bit for that long, but still.
Sounds like an interesting concept. I was never a fan of that episode...to say the very least...but the idea of a pony superhero, if done right could make for some pretty fun adventures.
The first thing that popped into my mind after reading this was this image: http://gegenschein17.deviantart.com/art/Who-s-Viewing-the-Viewers-300796870?q=boost%3Apopular%20favby%3Agammaeradon%2F43290931&qo=24#/d4hvg0x
If you threw in something about how devastated Pluto was when MDW was a fake and her reasoning behind wanting to be one herself...that would really be interesting.
could be interesting
Eh... Stick with Whisper of Wind for now, Conner.
Besides, Alicorn OCs tend not to be received favorably. You can give it a shot if you desire, but expect a lot of backlash from the community.
Still, the concept is good. I'd read it, but you really should finish Whisper of Wind before starting any other projects.
Sounds good to me.
But I'm pretty sure Pluto is a male name.
pinkie.ponychan.net/chan/files/src/134206142915.gif Bravo!
249270 What do you mean? Superman's kept his secret since the 30s. Sure, there could be a bit where she gets found out, but it could potentially go on pretty long.
Gonna be fun when/if the Mane Six find her. :D
"I don't get it. Where's her help? I'm pretty sure Pluto Star is giving her tips at the newspaper, or possibly doing the pegasus part of the identity, but who's her unicorn? Where does her earth pony live?"
Interesting.
Non-cannon alicorns/unipterippicorns are extremely difficult to write well, as they're automatically more special than everypony else. Can you write the story some other way?
Her secret identity of being a reporter is a bit overplayed in the superhero market. What other options do you have?
About the title: are you inspired by the Mask of the Phantasm, or the Mask of Zorro?
Reminds me of the MMDW comic on EQD with Luna as our beloved heroine, but I don't know about that as a story concept. It has a certain charm to it and I could think of a few plots, but it's just not my preferred type of story.
The origin story could use some work; "Freak genetics" is such an unsatisfying explanation compared to basically every other superhero in existence.
No. I dislike OC Alicorns intensely.
Also, the possibility of hiding a pair of wings/ a horn for so long is incredibly unlikely.
iambrony.jsmart.web.id/mlp/gif/130773496041.gif
249270 remember, there are ways around the whole flying thing if you're a Unicorn
ver good, but finish your other stuff first please
Write. This. Please.
The majority of these seems to be positive, so I guess I'm gonna' be on the party-pooper side of things.
I'm not liking the idea. But hey, nobody said every story has to appeal to everyone. Honestly, the most important person for it to appeal to is you.
I do indeed like this idea very much. I don't care if you put anything else on hold.
249282
I think the anti-alicorn stance is nothing to regard too highly. The most obvious two in canon are extremely strong, yes, but then just have an alicorn who's not unusually strong, or have one who's actually pretty weak in any one area and is a pony jack-of-all-trades, master-of-none. Make her awful at coordinating her wings. Make her magic feeble or too specialized to be of more general use. Both kinds of magic could be under conflict in the same body, reducing her to using her wings for gliding (easier than powered flight) and to using her horn as something like a knife on her head.
249274
Yes. Pluto is not a very good name. I'd try something else.
>> OP
Pluto is, as far as anypony knows, a regular pegasus.
I think it would be easier to hide the wings under a shirt or jumpsuit or dress than to hide a horn under a hat. Hats can be knocked off, and given how the horn grows out the head, the hat would have to be at an odd angle. Or ridiculously large.
Despite both her parents being pegusai, Pluto was a once-in-a-million rare mutation
I'm not sure about mutation. Maybe she won the genetic jackpot because she had a unicorn ancestor, or something? Maybe her alicorn status is actually considered a genetic disease when unicorn and pegasus elements mix, and usually most couplings with the mix don't result in a child? (Trust me, genetics is very complex, so this isn't as weird as it sounds).
It certainly looks like you could have a lot of fun with this one. How are you going to handle villains? Will they be comedic yet still evil, or outright monsters? Themed supervillainy or normal ponies who are corrupt and have a lot of resources available?
You could play the masked hero in the shadows stereotype to explore her feelings of loneliness and fear of being an outcast. That could be a good source of drama.
And you could include cameos of Royal Guard alicorns from a glitch in the Season 2 finale, if you wanted.
This could be quite good way to have MMDW without needing the Mane Cast. I like the potential.
A supermare story ?
I would love to read that.
Plus, it probably needs a different job. Reporter is a little too obvious. Maybe she could be a teacher, or a security mare for extra irony.
Sounds great! Pluto needs fics about her and I liked Mare Do Well herself. I'm interested in seeing how this goes.
To the neighsayers, Pluto isn't an OC, she's an animation error. You know, like a certain beloved grey pegasus started off as.
This sounds very interesting, I would definitely give it a read.
ALL MY WANTS... You won't have a shortage of people wanting to pre-read THIS story, that's for certain! xD
I think you have enough talent to make this into the best Mare-do-Well story on the site. However, I would personally prefer if you focused more on Whisper of Wind. But that's just because "On a Cross and Arrow" is my favorite fic, and I'm excited to see where the sequel goes.
Do as you will.
Hell yeah do it!
I say yes, I use to hate alicorn ocs, but with cadence it makes more sense for there to be other alicorns. This would be a fun story, please do.
I've always loved Batman (Mostly TAS and Justice League), so maybe a dark, brooding Ponyville, with filth and crime hidden just beneath the thin veneer of a small city. The ponies below fear her, thinking her a revolutionary, a terrorist supporting some villain's attempt to seize control of their fair city. Eventually, the accumulated filth of their blood and sex will foam up around their flanks, and all the mares and mayors will cry "Save us!", and I'll look down and whisper, "If you say please."
I've been taking lessons from Rorschach.
Damn... I hate to be the party pooper, but even when I think the story sounds good. It still needs something. Is not the Alicorn part that upsets me. But perhaps the "Resurrection" of the hero without a good and strong reason.
Also I think it would be a good idea to have a stronger connection to the mane 6, since they were the original Mare Do Well.
Very nice concept, would love to see a story of it.
Would the Mane 6 or other canon characters appear in it as well? If so as minor characters or with more major roles?
Carry On
While I'm not much of a fan of any alicorn OC story, this one sounds fun. For sure, I would read it.
seems like a good plan, but you would need to cross it with the mane 6 in their new jobs (like twilight the new mayor of ponyville, and rainbow dash the loose cannon cop) trying to figure out who the MMDW is. if you want more intrigue throw in some of the mane 6 knowing (rarity re-designing costume and pinkie with her pinkie sense) and trying to keep it a secret to protect their new friend.
249286
Pluto Star was your average reporter, a pegasus from the struggling news firm Wing Flap Express. Until one day, when she was bitten by a radioactive horn, and became an alicorn...
249318
From the original concept it sounds like Pluto is able to match up to the original MDW making a rather weak unicorn/pegasus concept difficult to sell.
I have an angle that could work both the success of MDW with the not so super superhero into the same pony. The Man Who Knew To Little (Bill Murray). Turn up the accidental luck factor to 11. Presto you get a not so super superhero that somehow saves the day sometimes without even realizing it.
249273
it could be a paralell world like C&A. perhaps set in the marevel universe? or DColt?
where freak genetics are the least likely but still possible?
249419
A radioactive rhinoceros. Or a radioactive narwhal.
Or she just magically sprouted a horn when she got her cutie mark (80% of X-men origins)
Or, you know, aliens. Humans. Whatever.
(Edit: I'm actually liking the human angle. For some reason, the idea of humans turning a pegasus into an alicorn is hilarious to me. Maybe too meta?)
I'll keep reading your other stories, I'm not too big on this story. I'm sorry
hiding a horn for that long? Plenty of possible plot points to go with that. Let's see this concept turned into a story!
Interesting concept. The MDW concept is a little overdone, so always have something that distinguishes your story from the clump of other fics. Good concept though, and I like the fact that you are making up an OC to be MDW, having a BG char be MDW would be weird.
249359
I think you have enough talent to make this into the best Mare-do-Well story on the site.
I take it you've never read "Eyes Without A Face" by theycallmejub. That was easily the best MDW on this site. Not a knock against Conner's talent or anything, but he'd have to make a hell of an effort to match EWAF.
One in a million mutation sounds kinda fishy...
Apart from that, I like it, I don't think someone wrote a good fic like that before.
Even though Ponyville is sort of small. It should be happening in Manehattan or other big city, but then, it'd be stripped of cannon characters.
Make it happen!
Most intriguing, though surely such a high-profile alicorn would attract the notice of the princesses. And something tells me a pair of glasses, I mean, a hat will be enough to fool the stewards of the sun and moon.
I've never been big on the concept of mdw in pony cannon, as most superhero's need to hide there real identety to be able to that what is considered outside the law in order to help people/ponies.
I also seem to recall that the horn was not hidden in the mdw costume despite the hat, but i'd have to rewatch the episode to confirm that.
Also most alicorns have larger wings than normal pegasi so he/she'll probably attract attention for that alone.
But despite what i sed, you should be writing becouse you want to write it. not becouse everyone wants it.
If you think you can make a good story with it and you enjoy writing it, don't let anyone stop you from doing so.
i loved on a cross and arrow and it's sequel, i hope you continue to write that as well if you deside to go trough with this concept or another story.
love the story idea and i will read this when/if it comes out
Interesting. Seems worth exploring.
It's
OVER 9000!!!
249271 That is so sad. I remember that picture and it's still hard to imagine how heart breaking it is to find out your idol was built around a big lie to teach somepony who let a bit of attention get to her head. I'm sure she's more thinking that her hero never really was what she imagined would be but, still hurts to have your hopes and dreams shattered like that.... and to Twi and the gang doing things without much consideration about the effects their little games can have on others.
I also agree, we all need a bit of a gimmick to work a story out but hopefully you can explain how an alicorn can hide through school life and beyond without ever dropping her hat even once lol xD she must of had a very lonely childhood to be forced to wear a hat all day every day when she went out for school or to hang out with friends. No doubt be picked on for being so obsessed with hats :P
But it's not like everything needs explaining so as long as the adventures are fun, the past can stay as hidden as Bruce Wanes who ever only let you peek into his mind every now and again to get tidbits of his past. Batman the Animated series is best series of batman ever, seriously.