The Announcement · 5:48am Apr 1st, 2015
So you're all expecting news, eh? Well, here it is.
I'm retiring.
Not from writing, mind you, but from fan fiction. My recent news that I'm soon to be published is a sign that it's time for me to stop all this wankery and nonsense and start working on more serious things.
Don't worry, Continuity fans, I'm sure that Swirling, Yami, or Aragon can take the stories up and finish them. In any case, here's the remaining plot for the trilogy.
Thank you all for your support over the years, but it's time for this eagle to spread his wings. CAW CAW!
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Shining Armor learns from Brother Veritas (who now has the ability to see the future) about the Changelings in Ponyville. He rushes to the town and confronts the King and Queen. After a pitched battle, Chrysalis realizes that Carapace has been playing her and turns on him. In anger, Carapace destroys the clutch of eggs. The remaining Changelings turn on their King and drain him of his life-force.
Chrysalis is distraught but finds comfort in, of all ponies, Shining Armor. The Changelings make peace with Equestria and Chrysalis marries Shining Armor to seal the pact. Luna and Cadance are not thrilled.
Back in Ponyville, Filthy Rich rigs a ton of explosives in hopes of covering up his work with the Changelings. Mac discovers his treachery and, in the ensuing struggle, is killed along with the business-stallion in the explosion. Cheerilee blames Fluttershy for his death and leaves Ponyville forever.
After a mental breakdown, Crescendo comes clean about his feelings to Rarity. After discussing things with Spike, she decides to make their little family more secure. Under Equestria’s laws on polygamy (rapidly growing in popularity) the three get married.
When Celestia’s strength does not appear to be returning, she insists that Twilight take the throne.
'On the Wings of War'
Shining Armor begins to act more villainous, believing that he is more suited for the throne than his sister since he is married to three kingdoms and has two heirs. Applejack reveals her godly heritage to Rainbow Dash who does not take the news well. Unable to deal, she leaves her lover and moves in with Scootaloo.
Terrified of what her brother might do, Twilight tries to unite her friends to re-activate the Elements of Harmony. They all pitch new Bearers of Laughter to no avail. It is Scootaloo who suggests Derpy Hooves. Derpy, along with Fluttershy, are revealed to be from the same tribe as Dash and Scootaloo. The Element of Laughter activates and the power of Harmony is once again active.
Shining Armor assembles an army and prepares to march on Canterlot. Luna, frightened by what her beloved has become, betrays him and flees with Moon Shadow. Twilight has no choice but to use the Elements, transforming Shining Armor into a Crystal statue. Derpy accidently bumps into him and shatters him. Cadance and the now once again pregnant Chrysalis retreat to the Empire.
Fearful of any further coups, Celestia calls Applejack to Canterlot and uses the last of her magic to seal her in stone, monologuing about her time as the Phoenix Queen. To her shock, Applejack returns to life as a creature made of stone. Applejack declares herself the Terra Queen and strangles Celestia with summoned vines.
'All the Pretty Little Horses'
One hundred years later, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, the CMC, Crescendo, Luna… they’re all dead.
Weary of her crown, Twilight prepares to abdicate the throne to Moon Shadow. Cadance appears in Canterlot for the first time in a century bringing with her Morning Dew and his sister, the new Changeling queen Masque. The Terra Queen hears of the brewing conflict and also comes to the kingdom.
Much to Twilight’s chagrin, a war begins to brew. The potential rulers learn of the Apple of Chaos and each demand it.
A full on war erupts, signified by a titanic storm over all Equestria. The storm is alive and has a name; Sombra.
Twilight is visited by Nevermore and Doctor Whooves. They explain that Twilight must send somepony back in time to the event that started everything. As Equestria crumbles, Twilight seeks Masque and implores her to use her Changeling abilities. Masque, hating the war around her, agrees. She accompanies the time travelers through the time stream and takes the form of the pony who kick-started Equestria’s end; Rarity.
Masque is suddenly in Rarity’s place, just after giving Sweetie Belle that fateful letter. Sweetie Belle looks up from the letter, tears in her eyes.
“Is it true?” She asks.
To save all Equestria, to end the blood-shed, to undo the madness that has consumed all of Equestria… Masque does the only thing she can.
She grins widely.
“April Fools!”
I want to stress how fake that all is.
In all seriousness, the real announcement is in 48 hours.
Whether it's a prank or not, all of us are very proud of you that you are finally getting represented for the excellent work you've done. Just remember the little guys when you show up on the New York Times Best Seller's List.
Peace.
Considering all the angst you've been going through, I half expected the news to actually be something like this.
The horrible part? Part of me was looking forward to it, if only because I could get pissed off and rant at the (relatively few) tropers who had been dismissive of the story, and keep the continuity on a pedestal of What Could Have Been. It's almost a pity you PM'd me or I might well have been taken in.
Props, though. Most of this sounded plausible based on the trajectory the story has taken. In fact, I'm pretty certain one detail in here is very true, so I can't help but wonder about any other
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2930521 Hey, you said last year that you didn't care for jokes such as these. I was simply trying to spare my most faithful follower.
Ha, I'm sure you taking the dismissive ones down a peg would have been highly entertaining.
There are actually three minor details in this pile of lies that are actually true (or at least partially true), but I won't come out and just reveal which ones.
My goal with these fake plot details was to go as dark as possible while also playing around with certain aspects of the Continuity folks find irritating (Shining getting all the ladies, three way relationships every which way you look, etc.) and things that are so silly that they should immediately throw people off;
(Derpy bumps into a crystallized Shining Armor. He teeters over and breaks.)
(Stunned silence from assembled ponies)
Derpy: I just don't know what went wrong...
You almost scared me for a bit until I remembered what today it was.
2931679 Part of me actually thought/hoped before Changelings started that we might get Cresparity OT3. Doesn't seem likely, or even palatable, now though. And I did wonder some about Carapace and Chrysalis's relationship (as laid out in various recent entries for Big Bad, Big Bad Duumvirate and The Heavy), though if Carapace was playing Chryssy, one wonders how he's faking the love he supposedly empowers her with....
2936332 Man, you guys turned on Crescendo REAL quick.
You have to remember that Crescendo is going through a journey right now, and that journey is multi-faceted. Crescendo might be a bit speciest, but I think he's ashamed of that fact. Also remember that he called Spike a 'gecko' to his face in a joking manner.
Crescendo's at that point where he's seeing where he is in life (divorced, single father, etc.) and is angry that someone else has the life he thinks he should have (specifically a unicorn he's in love with.) Spike is the target his anger is pointed at, and Cheerilee might be the rain that can douse that fire of anger.
Crescendo's story is one of the most important plot points of 'Changelings' and 'War,' and I can only hope that you find the path he ends up taking satisfactory, one way or another.
(Fun fact; I once got a PM requesting a clopfic that would have been Cresparity. I was so amused by the prospect I actually banged out a short outline for my archives and titled it 'Making a Deposit.')
As to Carapace and Chryssy, that's another pair of stories being told, and both will end in ways you won't expect.
"Don't worry, Continuity fans, I'm sure that Swirling, Yami, or Aragon can take the stories up and finish them. In any case, here's the remaining plot for the trilogy."
I'm doing what now? Well I WAS going to surprise you with a nice story to edit but I guess picking up your many stories and finishing them also works.
*picks up a pen* "And they all lived happily ever after and the pony you hate is dead and the pony you like is dancing on his/her grave and that romance you wanted is going on and everything is awesome. GOOD NIGHT!" *Mic drops*
Thank Celestia that was a fake announcement.