Why I'm Going to Stop Writing Diamond Tiara Fics · 4:16am Aug 21st, 2014
Diamond Tiara gagged as she threw the book to the ground, feeling disgusted with herself. She leaned against the wall, making sure to take deep breaths. Who the hell was this ‘Mattricole’?! Surely he was some sick, foal fiddler freak! Why else would he be writing stories about her and Apple Bloom?
Diamond Tiara growled as she picked the book back up. She glared at the cover of “Apple Bloom’s Disastrous Hearts and Hooves Day”. Her hooves shook in anger as she turned back to the last page, depicting her and Apple Bloom showing their ‘true’ feelings towards another. A horrendous scream gargled in her throat, before finally being released.
“Mattricole!” she screamed. “I will kill you, and all of your descendants!” With a wicked snarl and her pent up rage, Diamond Tiara threw herself out the window, scaring several other fillies and colts. She quickly grabbed one (by the name of Scootaloo), and mounted the poor foal.
“Hey! What gives?” Scootaloo demanded, before being roughly kicked in the flanks.
“Heyaa! Git along, lil doggy!” Diamond Tiara ordered, once again spurring on Scootaloo with her hooves.
“Okay! Just stop kicking me!” Scootaloo whined as she quickly carried Diamond Tiara off to her destination.
It wasn’t long before the two finally made it to the Mayor Mare’s office. Diamond Tiara quickly got off of Scootaloo, slapping her flank in a show of releasing her.
“...Jerk,” Scootaloo muttered as she headed back to school with an aching flank.
Diamond Tiara ignored the orphan and marched inside the building. She quickly made her way to a tied up Mayor Mare and removed her ball gag.
“How dare you march in here!” Mayor Mare screamed in rage. “You know today is my day to unwind and you-”
“I need information,” Diamond Tiara interrupted. I need to know where Mattricole lives, and you’re going to tell me!” Diamond Tiara demanded, causing Mayor Mare to sigh.
“Why? He should be here for our annual bondage sex in three…two...one…”
“Honey!” I scream as I enter the door. “I’m here to...oh shit…”
“You!” Diamond Tiara screams as she pounces on me. “I am going to kill you!”
“Nnnooooooo!” I scream as several of my organs are ripped from my body.
And that is why I no longer write Diamond Tiara fanfics...cause I’m dead.
...But seriously, should I expand on this?
Well, that was entertaining.
How can you expand upon this if you are dead?
Unless....
ZOMBIE!!!!
Yes. Expand ALL the organs.
Oh, you mean turn it into an actual full blown Matrricole adventure?
PARTY ON, DUDE! Go for broke!
Expand it into a story!
I too am curious on how this would possibly be expanded. Is this like, some sort of weird rescue sim where the chosen few of us have to embark on an epic adventure through the cosmos to save Mattricole and find the Dragon Balls?
Also, please tell me I’m not the only one who saw “anal bondage sex."
I'm pretty sure it classifies as a meta-fic, which is against the story submission rules of fimfic, because it is characters interacting with fimfic users.
2387717 didn't they lift that partially? I'll have to check for myself.
2387717 Hmm...Looks like it's up to the mod pre-reading it. So they may accept it or not accept it, doesn't hurt to try.
2387818
I remember one story I wrote involving a fimfic user as a main character passed, but in that case it was an AU Equestria dubbed the "Riffingverse" where the users in question - the "riffers" actually were ordinary people in Equestria independent of their user selves.
I want to hear more about this
2387585 Or a ghost.
Who ya gonna call?