The Chicken Dance Summoning Ritual · 10:14pm Jun 7th, 2014
Y'ever have one of those days where thing just seem... Weird? Odd? That point between "no fucks given due to happy", "no fucks given because irritated", and "murder everything"?
I had that today and it appeared that I wasn't the only one to have this day at all, either.
Lemme start from the top, see, I was given a walkie talkie today. Normally, I don't get them as I am always thrown into the truck to toss boxes about, right? But at some point between when I stopped work the previous day and before I went in the next day, I pulled a muscle in my shoulder or something and asked if I could be excused from doing so.
She said sure, gave me a walkie, and told me to pull pallets.
Alright, cool, I can do that. Except... I hate having a walkie. I find it to be an annoying, squawking, awkwardly-placed-no-matter-what-you-do object best left in the trash. And if I am required to have one (which isn't often) I refrain from using it because I'll be a snarky bastard on it without fail.
So, we get done the truck, pull everything out, and work as usual. Nothing weird happens until around 7:30am when my manager boss overlordteam leader hits the talk button and asks for me to respond.
I give a groan and decide, 'fuckit, I'ma be a smartass' and say in a very deep voice: "I have been summoned."
A pause. Then: "You've been summoned, huh? That's all it takes?"
"No. Normally you have to perform the ancient pagan ritual of the chicken dance."
Much to my surprise, she did not hesitate: "Oh, ok, hey can you..." And things went as normal from there.
Until about 9:45.
I'm back from lunch, in domestics/homelines/plastics doing my shit and trying to get out before it clicks over to the point where I've been awake for 12 goddamn hours.
As I begin my journey back to my flat to get yet another box to stock, I hear my walkie click on. Except, instead of someone requesting someone or something... A very irritating song plays, and when I round the corner, I see the most unexpected thing next to my flat:
My manager is next to it, with one random employee next to her. The employee is holding the lead's walkie and phone, holding the PtT button to allow the music from the phone to carry through, which was, strangely enough, the chicken dance. As the music plays, my manager is in the middle of the aisle near the flat, with about 4-5 customers staring in what has to be the most perplexed way possible, as she breaks into none other than the chicken dance.
She does this for about a minute when the song ends and the employee releases the button, my manager turns to me and simply smiles. Next thing we hear is the store manager click on and asks a very simple question.
"Um... <a slight pause> Did someone just play... The chicken dance over the walkie...?"
My manager, before anyone can reply, snatches the walkie from the employee and says like it was the most natural thing ever, "Yes. I did."
"<yet another pause>... Can I ask why?"
She smiles without looking away from me and grins a grin worthy of a lotto winner and then, with no hesitation at all and a voice to match her grin says, "Because I needed to perform the ancient pagan ritual of the chicken dance to summon one of my team members."
You can almost feel the silence in the store after she said that. Everyone essentially stopped just to try and figure out just why, exactly, that would be a needed action. The silence was finally broken by a reply from the store manager.
"...Right, carry on then..."
Yeah. That happened. I don't know why, but that happened.
Allow me to restate this.
My manager danced the chicken dance in order to request me to do something.
So. How was your day?
~Skeeter The Lurker
I went for a walk. It was nice.
Well... That happened.
You have an awesome colleague if she did that!
2184887
I know, right?
~Skeeter The Lurker
This made my day.
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I'm just visiting my mother... Nothing special. Going home tomorrow again.
I think your team leader is awesome.
Tis a glorious day when you find someone who respects and plays along with your sense of humor. By the way, did your reply about being summoned have anything to do with your last blog post or was it just a coincidence?
Gifs relevant.
i.imgur.com/oq9B8UV.gif
i.imgur.com/acl8bL3.gif
You're not the only one who hates phone-like devices, Skeeter. My parents have forced me to keep a phone right next to my computer (I'm staring at the accursed thing right now as I type this) and I swear every time it rings I just want to smash it against the ground.
Anyway, my day has been okay so far. I just turned 22 yesterday, my brother graduated from high school today, and I've got friends over right now chatting it up with my parents and grandparents on the back porch. Had some friends over the other day too, who are currently visiting relatives in China.
So, yeah, my day's been pretty eventful.
~The lizardman is finished
Greatest. Manager. Ever.
You have one fucking cool manager.
Hey, maybe she likes you. Lemme think of something...
Aha! Skeetager 4 life!
I did a bunch of stuff today... too bad none of it was the thing I was supposed to be doing,
Well... that... was a thing.
Rush and Pony on!
T4E
That's brilliant.
This is clearly the best way to page someone going forward. Life-canon accepted.
Marry her.
I wish such open mindedness at workplaces were more common. That's a very nice thing that happened. Your team leader has a great sense of humour.
Well, I didn't have any chicken incidences, but I started playing Smite, so my day's been confusing and boring.
I just woke up. I'm exhausted.
Sleeping is hard.
... a car just passed by my street playing the Chicken Dance song on max volume.
IT HAS BEGUN!
I honestly feel the chill of a Fowl Prophecy unravelling. Fowl indeed.
I finalized plans today for a week-and-a-half long China trip at the end of the month. I might do something related to the culture and scene over there, definitely bringing brony swag with me to allow the residents to bask in the awe of a Spike hoodie!
I dunno if I could ever be summoned by the chicken dance, but I have managed to get the staff to refer to me as "Dash", and today, I was chillin on register and the store manager came up and asked why I call myself that, I replied: There's two (naaame) on the front end. It's easier to call me Dash. besides, I'm at least 20% faster than the regular cashier.
Took a look at me, then to his assistant, then back.
"But, why Dash?"
"Rainbow Dash" <- The assistant manager
"Rainbow what?"
"Dude, you know Rainbow Dash?"-me(wearing mlp seatbelt belt and Applejack shoes)
"I've seen a few episodes.." -awkward silence as he stood behind the manager looking everywhere except at anyone-
I high fived him, and got him hooked on the series. +1 brony acquired! The manager just shook his head and defers to call me Dash because it is, in fact easier, than three heads turning to the same voice.
Reluctantly, I don't believe I'll be attending the con coming up unless I miraculously find:
-A ride/train route
-Travel companion
-lodging
-Designated drivers
-Con access
...before the allotted time expires. I will try to write something before then to liven up the gears a bit, though.
Why am I stupid amounts of happy to see Kap publish the harem fic? I mean, it was saucy, hot, and there was TF...Oh..fuck me, it was amazing!
~Dash The Stampede
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Always fun to do!
2184914
Glad it helped!
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Yes she is and yes they are.
2184983
Coincidence. Nothing more.
I just felt like being snarky on the walkie.
2185012
I don't mind cell phones. I just don't like store walkie talkies.
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Damn right she is!
2185060
Nah, she's taken, mate.
2185061
That video... YES.
At least you did something, right?
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And what a thing it is.
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I know, right? I was laughing for quite a bit after that happened.
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Gotta have some fun at work, y'know?
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I wish I could, but alas... She is taken.
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She really does. One of the better bosses I've had, really.
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Better than just boring, I'd assume.
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Ouch... Good morning?
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WE MUST SPREAD THE GOSPEL OF THE DANCE!
~Skeeter The Lurker
2185492
Wow, quite a bit happened with you!
I do hope to see you there, though!
~Skeeter The Lurker
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Good morning.
You asked for that.
Ah, glorious laughter.
Okay, I officially need to get a job at wherever it is you work.
I am so glad this happened.