• Member Since 15th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen Apr 3rd, 2014

Pastor Pulp


I'm a sexy general who enjoys generally generaling.

More Blog Posts14

Mar
27th
2014

The Fig Fag Bruddas · 4:30am Mar 27th, 2014

Well, looky what we got here, brother of mine, it's the same in every town
Ponies with thirsty throats, dry tongues, and not a drop of semen to be found
Maybe they're not aware that there's really no need for this teary despair

That the key that they need to solve this sad semen shortage you and I will share

Well you've got lots of sodomy
In this very community

He's Fig

He's Fag

We're the world famous Fig Fag brothers.
Traveling prostitutes nonpareil

Prosti- what?

Prostitutes, and that's exactly the reason why, you see
No pony else in this whole place will give you a good deal on anal sodomy
And that's a new world, with tons of semen
Fresh squeezed and ready for drinking

More semen than you can drink in all your days of thinking.

I doubt that.

So take this anal sodomy

It's buy one get one free

He's Fig

He's fag.

We're the world famous Fig Fag brothers
Traveling prostitutes nonpareil

I suppose by now you're wondering 'bout our peculiar mode of transport

I say, our mode of locomotion

And I suppose by now you're wondering, where is this promised semen?

Any horse can say he came and any pony can do the same

But my brother and I have something most unique and superb
Unseen at any time in this great new world

And that's faggot sodomy

Folks, it's the one and only, the biggest and the best

The unbelievable

Unimpeachable

Indispensable

I can't believe-able

Fig Fag brothers' Super Speedy Semen Squeezy 6000

What d'you say, handsome?

Oh, we got lots of sodomy
In this very community
Please Fig, please Fag, let us get a good shag
With your Shim Sham sisters' Super Speedy Semen Squeezy 6000

Dear stallion, I would be ever so honored if you might see fit to let my sister and I borrow some of your delicious, and might I add spell-bindingly fragrant semen for our little demonstration here?

Uh, sure, I guess.

Opportunity, in our community

Ready Fig?

Ready Fag?

Let's beej this man!

Shim: And show these thirsty ponies a world of delectable semen!

Semen, semen, semen, semen...

Watch closely my friends!

The fun begins!

Now, here's where the magic happens, right here in this heaving roiling semen press suction cups of the very machine, those penises sucked fresh are right now as we speak squirting lots of grade-A top-notch five-star blow-your-horseshoes-off one-of-a-kind semen!

Feel free to take a sneak peek!

Now wait, you faggots, hold it!
You went and over-sold it!
I guarantee that what you have there won't compare
For the very most important ingredient
Can't be added or done expedient
And it's quality, friends, Apple Acres' lube and pubic hair!

Well granny, I'm glad you brought that up, I say I'm glad you brought that up
You see that we are very picky when it comes to semen if you'll kindly try a cup

Yes, sir, yes ma'am this great machineit's just the very best
So whaddaya say then, Apples
Care to step into the modern world
And put the Super Speedy Semen Squeezy 6000 to the test?

Semen, semen, semen, semen...

What do you think, folks? Do you see what the Apples can't? I see it clear as day! I know she does! So does he! C'mon Ponyville, you know what I'm talking about!

We're saying you've got

Lots of sodomy
In this very community
He's Fig, He's Fag
We're the world famous Fig Fag brothers
Traveling prostitutes nonpareil

Yeah!

Report Pastor Pulp · 464 views ·
Comments ( 5 )

So does this mean Applejack does it "by hoof" and "with plenty of care and affection"?

I can't believe I just read that whole thing from start to finish.

I'm also glad that I did. I love this new song.

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