Review: The Stranger and Her Friend

War fics irritate me. It's not a matter of their quality, really: most of them are written by competent authors with a reasonable understanding of how to string together a standard fantasy/sci-fi plot. Regardless, there's something inherently uncomfortable to me in the mixture of ponies and violence. Even leaving aside the show's kid-friendly tone, Friendship is Magic's modus operandi has always been the peaceful resolution of conflicts. Even when confrontation is inevitable, foes are dispatched with force-fields made of feelings, not swords and maces. If you're going to go against that, you need a compelling reason and strong influence from its tone to prevent the story from lapsing into a generic fantasy melange.

The Stranger and Her Friend does the best job that I've seen of reconciling ponies with war. There's a constant awareness of tone, here, an acknowledgement of the show's spirit even at its darkest moments that makes it work work where other fics don't. Admittedly, the first few chapters don't make the story seem like anything special. They're taken up by cryptic dream sequences, monologues by Discord, and a curt OC that seems to fly in the face of anything resembling the show's tone. You could be forgiven for thinking that this story was, like Upheaval, a generic and slow-paced fantasy story hiding under the guise of fanfiction. But a funny thing happens as it continues. Small details begin to show up, like a cheerful foal wandering the halls of Canterlot Palace and an adorably nebbish weapons trainer. Celestia's disgruntled guide gets lectured for his grumpiness, and she makes a number of new friends. And then, as the story opens up in earnest, you begin to realize that the author knows what he's doing, and that this is a story that's specifically been written for ponies all along. I can't overstate the importance of this; it's one of the few stories about Equestria going to war that I couldn't imagine working better if all the characters were suddenly replaced by humans.

None of this is to say that this story is a soft one. Society's attitude towards love and friendship is summarized by Daylight, Equestria's own little Joan of Arc: "Let there be victory now, and harmony later!" The hordes of chaos control the land outside of the city strongholds, headed up by a manic, diabolical incarnation of Discord perfectly willing to crush whole societies with impunity. War is a fact of life, but even the most triumphant campaigns can do nothing more than reclaim what has already been conquered. The peaceful communal society that exists inside Canterlot's walls belies the tension of life outside.

Moose's newborn Celestia seems to act as an avatar for her entire race in more ways than just the obvious: nowhere is the balancing act that the story walks between peace and violence more apparent than in her. She's naive, and at times quite childish, but these emotions are undercut by determination and a firey sense of righteousness. Over the course of a few chapters she can go from fleeing the castle in tears to fending off all comers in a swordfight. She's alternately curious, shy, and feisty. This portrayal forms a welcome and interesting contrast with her behavior in the framing device as the wise, composed ruler we've come to know from the show.

It should say something that even with Celestia's strong characterization, she's still routinely outshone by the cast of supporting characters. Moose has a talent for creating distinctive and likeable OCs, and almost all of them are strong enough to stand on their own. Cotton is the biggest example, a cute confectioner reminiscent of a more thoughtful and reserved Pinkie Pie who is almost single-handedly responsible for keeping the levity of the show alive when the story transitions from the city to the battlefield. She's capable of goofy, cheerful humor as well as serious ruminations, all the while underpinned by a nigh-unflappable sense of optimism. Lucky Break is more bread-and-butter fantasy, a military commander with a dark past, but his angst is measured and well-placed. His rocky friendship with Celestia is colored by his grief and self-blame over the death of his commanding officer, a mare whom she bears a suspicious resemblance to. Furthermore, these characters are dynamic. They respond to plot developments, changing in ways that may be surprising but make sense, and the story is clearly built with these events in mind. Characters die and suffer, and other ponies change significantly as a result. Backstories add new aspects to certain characters, and they themselves change with the telling. The author, in short, is sensitive to the needs of a story with such a large scope, something that's fairly rare to see in ponyfic.

Even leaving aside the characters, though, The Stranger and Her Friend has surprisingly complex themes for fanfiction, with none of the pretense that such descriptions usually imply. Religion is a frequent subject: the entire concept of "harmony" takes on theological connotations. Soldiers go to pray at a loose approximation of a cathedral every week on the day of Harmony, and hear sermons about its value. It appears to be some combination of moral virtues and a sort of nirvana-like concept, upgrading the show's conceit of friendship as "magic" into a sort of theological virtue slash moral imperative. At other points, the story explores Celestia's discomfort at being seen as the deity of a society that existed with its own religion long before she ever arrived. It even gets away with analogizing Twilight's admiration of her to religious worship. Other moments of depth include Lucky's backstory, which is a great example of how the difference between insufferable cliché and compelling trope can lie in one new element or a change in context. It's at its heart another story about a hero's doomed hometown, but, with the change in perspective manages to make it a great slice-of-life nugget that's genuinely tragic in the way that it explains the root of both his character flaws and the way said flaws drove him to become the pony he is today.

My only substantial complaint has to do with the fight scenes. Compared to the more down-to-earth slice-of-life that predominates in the earlier part of the narrative, they stick out like a sore thumb, feeling like they'd be more at home in an anime or a pulp low fantasy novel. At times, it feels like the mooks scatter like bowling pins before the main characters, without any particular physical or magical advantage to account for it. (TUM also has a somewhat annoying shorthand where he lists off the actions the main characters are taking without actually bothering to describe them.) Personally, though, there's always been a sort of guilty pleasure for me in pony fight scenes ("It's a pony! And it's bucking a guy in the face!") and provided you're willing to suspend disbelief a little, these will definitely scratch that itch. The current penultimate chapter in particular is a massive, utterly ridiculous setpiece that had me giggling the whole way through at its sheer scale. While it's not quite fitting with the rest of the narrative, I can't blame TUM: there can't be many better ways to send off a story for a two-year hiatus.

There are some other assorted quibbles, as well. A fair portion of the dialogue early on consists of characters speaking in overwrought rhetorical questions and flowery language, sometimes to the point of cliché. The author is a little too zealous in his attempts to sell us on Cotton. And it's certainly not a terribly original story, when you get down to the nitty-gritty: most of the tropes employed are fairly standard for fantasy, although some of them are applied in unexpected ways. But let me put it this way: I read this story around the same time I was working through Brandon Sanderson's Elantris, the first book of a professional fantasy writer beloved by many. It's considered one of his weaker books, but it's still fairly close to his par. I found Stranger both stronger in its characterization, more authentic in the feel and scope of its worldbuilding, and more nuanced in its evocations of spirituality. This is one of the few pieces of long-form fanfiction that I can safely say such things about.

Comments

[TheUrbanMoose]

Hi there!

I've been meaning to do this for a long time, but I guess I've been busy. Doing things. Really important things. (Not really, I'm just a horrible procrastinator.)

First of all, thanks a ton for writing this. Sometimes I feel so clever, slipping in little references and themes I don't think anyone will understand. I mean, it's just a generic fantasy, right? Yet time and again, I see my readers are cleverer than I give them credit for -- and certainly many of them are cleverer than me.

You may be interested to know that Eternal by device heretic was what inspired me to start writing my own story. The plot was engaging, the themes were fascinating, and the prose was wonderful -- and everything was so heavy with emotion. Every sentence had something worth reading. Pithy with meaning and raw feels. It was new, and it excited me. And the best part? The moral of the story is arguably, "friendship is magic". It was dark, emotional, and it still stuck to the message of the show. I wanted to write something like that. I wanted my story to be that.

But apparently, I couldn't stand to tear myself away from the slow-paced fantasy shtick. The result is what is indeed a slow-paced fantasy, packed with as many interesting themes and characters as I could muster -- being dark, while doing my best to remember this is My Little Pony we're dealing with (and trying my darndest not to come off as stupidly "edgy"). I'm still working on that, but I like to think I've made a valiant effort.

you begin to realize that the author knows what he's doing

Yes, let's go with that.

Religion is a frequent subject

And mostly by accident, I'll have you know. Religion is a big part of who I am. To me, it seemed natural for spirituality to be a part of the story. The questions of "Who am I? Where did I come from?" are a big deal in Stranger. In the real world, religion is man (and God's) answer to these things.

It also doesn't hurt that Twilight's mentor is a demigod who controls the sun.

She's alternately curious, shy, and feisty. This portrayal forms a welcome and interesting contrast with her behavior in the framing device as the wise, composed ruler we've come to know from the show.

I'm glad you think so. I often feel like young Celestia is too wildly emotional: shy today, bold tomorrow; getting her trash kicked one minute, and becoming an expert swordspony the next. Most, if not all of these contrasts are intentional, and I think she does develop as a character, but I can't help but wonder if sometimes things are slightly disorienting and awkward. I'm glad that is not the case!

distinctive and likeable OCs

Thanks! This is a bigger compliment than you know.

My only substantial complaint has to do with the fight scenes.

The current penultimate chapter in particular is a massive, utterly ridiculous setpiece that had me giggling the whole way through at its sheer scale.

Yes, regarding action/fight scenes, I have no idea what I'm doing. I have absolutely no experience writing them, and that annoying shorthand is a result of me thinking, "Wow, I wish this scene would end quicker. I have feels to write." Though I told myself my characters would defy cliches and tropes, Lucky is still sometimes overpowered to the point of ridiculousness. And if chapter 25 had you giggling, 27 must have put you somewhere between "very amused" and "passed out from laughter-related asphyxiation."

The author is a little too zealous in his attempts to sell us on Cotton.

But... Cotton is best pony...

Anyways, thanks again for taking the time to make this. I hope you don't mind if I link it in a blog sometime soon. I would have done it a long while ago, but I figured I'd better respond myself first.