More Blog Posts539

  • 1w, 2d
    Comic Review: Issue #28 (The Revenge of Everfree, Part 2)

    At long last, the finale for the latest story arc has reached store shelves. Can our intrepid ponies save their home from those vile, racist, evil, disgusting, preachy-as-heck deer? Or will the wretched curse that is the theme park industry bring doom to all of Equestria?


    We pick up immediately where the last issue left off. Celestia and Luna have freed themselves from the vines and sent correspondence back to Twilight about the situation, while Zecora's attempts to stop the rampant plant growth have come to naught. Aspen is still insistent on destroying the ponies who are obviously behind everything with their tree-hating ways, and after some more attempts to persuade the minotaur Well-To-Do to give up fail, he finally just says they're being thrown out of the hidden deer village the next morning. So far, so bad.

    That's when things take a wee bit of a turn. Turns out Well-To-Do has gotten some sort of smoothie mix...and it somehow works just like the deer potions, only it still works on the supposedly toxic land. When Bramble discovers this, he's kidnapped by the minotaur, who is now ready to initiate his grand plan to make Aspen his toady, remove the deer resistance to his park, and make himself rich. Can the ponies and deer stop the real enemy: capitalism?

    This issue starts just as bad as the last one, echoing the same themes and kicking the Mane 6 around for the sake of comedy. About the only amusing moment is when Twilight tries to revoke Well-To-Do's right to sell merchandise in her likeness, only to reveal that he's created a totally original pony, Twilight Sporkle, who looks like Twilight but has a different face so they are completely original do not steal. The deer are still racist elves that take missed messages (which we see are being intercepted by one of Well-To-Do's goons) as a sign that the ponies are guilty and don't, you know, go in person to see what's up with Celestia.

    Things pick up, however, when Well-To-Do goes from a standard businessman archetype to Looten Plunder from Captain Planet. He essentially turns the elven-king into his park's mascot by holding his son hostage, keeps trying to bribe others into supporting him, and when everyone finally has enough of his crap, goes into a grand speech about how all he cares about is money and progress and everyone had just better give up.

    This would be unforgivably bad if it weren't accompanied by Blackthorn, the other deer we saw last issue briefly, taking control of the now-leaderless deer and, in a matter of moments, starting the entire species on the road to redemption by having the ponies form an army of Everfree monsters to wreck Well-To-Do's crew of bulldozers. And by bulldozers, I mean carts and wagons shaped like bulldozers that are pushed and pulled by ponies. They even have to make their own beeping noises when backing up. The issue ends with a not-quite-epic-but-still-amusing brawl where our heroes fend off Well-To-Do's forces while knocking all those smoothie barrels over, bathing the land in toxic Miracle-Gro and saving the day.

    ...Okay, the smoothie crap was really dumb and rushed. And why didn't the deer potions work again? The comic had better do something to distract me from this plot hole. You know, like killing the villain in a gruesome fashion. Which they proceed to do.

    Well-To-Do, a ruthless businessman obsessed with progress and money, is devoured by a hydra. The scene was apparently so graphic that they had to censor the panel, much like the gag they pulled when Chrysalis killed that lovey-bunny thing way back in Issue #3. And while the final gag strip shows the minotaur still alive in the hydra's stomach, it's only a matter of time before digestion kicks in and all that, so...yeah, he's dead.

    The issue ends with...well, Celestia apologizing to the deer that destroyed her kingdom because they were racist idiots. (Although to be fair, they are very quickly working to repair everything, with Aspen taking personal responsibility for the clean-up, so it isn't as bad as the time they forgave the kelpie for trying to drown them all on the flimsiest of reasons.) Still, Fluttershy nuzzles Philomena, and that's so adorable that it almost makes it worthwhile.

    Overall, this arc was better than the last one, but still very flawed. The first issue was just a mess from start to finish, and while this one toned down the environmentalism after the first third, it still had to carry a lot of the baggage. The villain only becomes enjoyable when he becomes a caricature, and even that's mostly because of how ridiculous he and his comeuppance are. The ponies do very little, which is a bit of a problem considering they're supposed to be the main characters. And the deer...if it weren't for Blackthorn, I'd be advocating exterminatus on their furry hides.

    The moral of the story:

    Elves suck.


    Next issue is about pony wrestling. Here is a brief summation of everything I know about professional wrestling:


    See you next week with two comics to look over.

    13 comments · 205 views
  • 1w, 3d
    On the "great" FiM vs Steven Universe "war"

    So yeah...more explosive drama. Yay.

    There's a show on Cartoon Network called Steven Universe. It's a series about the titular half-human, half-alien hybrid who lives in a sci-fi temple in a tiny beach town. He's raised by three alien warriors that are actually just space gems with hard light bodies, and who take him on missions to train him to become part of their group, the Crystal Gems. Between adventures, he hangs out with his dad (a failed musician who lives in a van and owns a car wash), his best friend/potential love interest Connie, two teenagers that work at the local donut shop, and his hyper-dimensional pet lion.  Over time, the series goes from problem-of-the-day adventures to include a longer story arc revolving about alien invasions, civil war, love and life itself, and Steven growing into a real Crystal Gem.

    It's a very solid series, combining simple-but-effective animation design with solid writing and a charming atmosphere and aesthetic that knows what mood to hit with every scene. It has a very Adventure Time feel to it - which makes sense considering Rebecca Sugar, the show's creator, also worked on that series - but honestly pulls off many of the same things better than that series. And unlike a certain Disney show, it can actually have new episodes in a reasonable amount of time.

    So yes, the show is good. So good that Calpain of Equestria Daily decided to create another, EqD-style site for it. Unfortunately, this caused nothing but drama and heartache, as the very idea of that loathsome other fandom coming into their turf sent bellyaching fans rallied against him until he finally gave up. That's nothing new.

    What is new is that it's the Steven Universe fandom that's stirred up the most shit about it.

    What it boils down to is that Steven Universe is popular, but not just because it's a good show. There are a lot of folks who like it because it's a progressive show. I won't go into too many details because I'd probably get it wrong, but here's an article that explains some things in a bit more detail. It's a children's cartoon that's doing a good job of representing groups that really don't get that good of a deal in media at large...so when news came that someone who created a BRONY website was going to create one for this show, people...overreacted, to say the least.

    To put it simply, the FiM fandom has a reputation. We've ruined MLP by taking it over and making it all about "creepy adult males." The first things anyone brings up is that we make porn, or that we put FiM with things that shouldn't go with it, or that we're chasing out all the little girls and women the show was made for. The fear was that we were going to do the same thing to Steven Universe. To which I say:

    A) There's a ton of porn and inappropriate crossovers already.

    B) The show is aimed at a general audience, whereas FiM is open a general audience but targeted towards girls. There's a difference.

    C) Gatekeeping your playhouse so that nobody but those you approve can come in is freaking stupid and counterproductive.

    Are there a lot of shitty bronies? Of course. Should there be standards on what is acceptable to post in places children can easily see, especially since parents cannot control all their online time in a world where a stapler can probably connect to the Internet? Yes. But there is a definite glass house issue going on with the reaction here. The Steven Universe fandom seems to be more in love with the representation the show provides than the fact that it's a good series. I'm happy that the show's laying some strikes against the shittiness of our society, but that's not why I enjoy watching it. I enjoy watching it because it's a good show. And good shows should be enjoyed by all.

    ...And for the record, there is nothing wrong with liking Fallout: Equestria. I don't like it myself, but it doesn't make you a bad person.

    33 comments · 330 views
  • 2w, 3d
    I'll soon have tons of time to write

    7 comments · 172 views
  • 3w, 2d
    Comic Review: Friends Forever #14 (Spike and Princess Luna)

    So, you might have noticed there were no comics last month. Due to a labor strike that basically screwed over all of IDW's releases for the last half of February, last month's issues will be coming out in March. And to start, let's look at Spike as he teams up with another princess. Sort of.


    Our adventure opens with Spike dreaming about a terrible episode a sub-par outing “Dragon Quest” and those big jerks known as teenage dragons. His vivid memories of his humiliation are stopped only when Luna interrupts the dream and awakens him, as she needs his help. There has been a series of strange fires in Fillydelphia, all of which seemed to have started in a perfectly straight line. And who is the prime suspect? Why, dragons, of course! Those foul, wild, vicious, perfectly-civilized dragons that have their own Chinatown analogue and are treated with suspicion by the Fillydelphia police...

    …Let's back up to “Dragon Quest” again. Remember how it was a big deal that Spike knew nothing about his past? Remember how Twilight went through seemingly every book in the library and stated that nopony knew much about dragons because of how wild and dangerous they are? And now there's an entire city of them in Equestria? Not to mention that the few moments we see with the Fillydelphia dragons paints them practically as saints, while the ponies are quick to use terms like “fire breathers” and equate Spike's presence to using Chrysalis to investigate identity theft. PONY RACISM, NOW AND FOREVER!

    I hate to keep harping on this point, but this is so at odds with how dragons have been shown up to this point that I can't accept it as simple worldbuilding. I can accept dragon civilizations, but in the middle of Equestria? Was this meant to erase “Dragon Quest” from continuity, like when they unceremoniously dumped Spike's pet? And I don't think it would be as bad if IDW hadn't said that they had to change things to match what the show's planning, meaning that this retcon may actually show up in the series. (Albeit in a hopefully better manner.)

    The issue's other problem is that Spike and Luna are not together very long. Much like the Fluttershy/Zecora issue, the two meet up, go to the problem, and then split for nearly the entirety of the adventure. The Celestia/Spike issue gave us some nice character growth and examined both of the cast members; here, Luna just pulls Spike into an adventure, goes off to do paperwork, and then yells at him. Spike ultimately stumbles across the answer (a fire snail that looks like it escaped the set of Adventure Time), with Luna only showing up to help slightly with the final rescue and apologize for not instantly believing the dragon.

    The character that Spike spends the most time with is a new one, a female dragon named Mina that works at a comic book store. There's a page-long conversation about how dragons are almost never shown as the heroes in comics, and Mina's every line is either her fangirling about Luna (which is hilarious) or her decrying how dragons are treated (which is forced). Between the pony racism and Mina's speechifying, the issue appears to be trying to take a stance regarding prejudice and social injustice, which would be fine if it didn't also interfere with the story itself.

    All that being said, there were plenty of highlights. Luna reminisces about banishing villains to the frozen north, and is promptly burned by the chief. One of the cops is obsessed with acting like a siren, most likely as a nod to the infamous Police Academy films. Twilight's dream is to alphabetize the entire Canterlot Library. The characterization for Luna and Spike is generally good, and you can tell the issue is really trying, but the rather large breach in continuity and poor handling of the pairing weigh this one down. It's a so-so issue overall.


    Next time, the bureaucracy expands to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy.

    9 comments · 221 views
  • 3w, 5d
    I'm a liar

    It's March, and Waning Moon has not been updated. I am officially a liar.

    It's all over. Thanks for stopping by.

    19 comments · 232 views
  • 4w, 3d
    To all those involved in stubborn, idiotic arguments about a goddamn fanfiction AU


    Also, Eye of the Hurricane may be cancelled and deleted soon. Just a heads up.

    18 comments · 333 views
  • 5w, 1d
    It's funny...

    I get home after a long day of dealing with angry people upset about their taxes, and I find this being featured on the site. Isn't serendipity fun?

    ...

    Look, I have nothing to talk about. I'm a lazy hack writer who hasn't written anything, so I can't talk about that. The latest issue of the comics is delayed because of a labor dispute, so I can't talk about that. I could regale you with tales of the people who think threatening to kill people will get them insured faster, but that's hardly newsworthy.

    ...

    I'm a horrible person, aren't I?

    16 comments · 170 views
  • 6w, 4d
    Jumping on the "I Write Like" bandwagon

    Because somebody else did it and I have no creativity whatsoever.

    So there's this website called I Write Like which attempts to compare you to published authors based on your style, word choice, etc. Pretty silly fluff, but whatever. Time to run some stuff through and see who I'm unconsciously ripping off.

    A Taste of Meat - Arthur Clarke

    A Shimmering Sunset - Vladimir Nabokov

    Waning Moon - J. K. Rowling

    A Chance Encounter (my contributions only) - J. R. R. Tolkien

    Of Hearts and Hooves - Neil Gaiman

    Eye of the Hurricane - David Foster Wallace

    And That's Terrible - J. R. R. Tolkien

    Bringing Up Blueblood - Raymond Chandler

    Well, I have to say, it's been interesting so far. Some strange results, but not too bad. Now let's try my first two stories...

    Keeping Your Hooves on the Ground - Dan Brown

    ...Okay...

    My Little Alicorn - Dan Brown

    ...

    I must sadly withdraw from the writing world forever. There are already too many Dan Browns.

    27 comments · 202 views
  • 7w, 5d
    I'm sorry about Friday

    I've had a weekend to relax and reflect, and I have much to talk about after...well, Friday's outburst. But in the meantime, two things. First:

    “Sorry to bother you, Zecora, but you're the smartest zebra I know when it comes to potions!” Pinkie cocked her head. “I mean, you're technically the only zebra I know, but you know more about potions than most ponies, except maybe Twilight, and Apple Bloom did make that one that turned out to be a disease, but...”

    The rambling ceased as Blueblood jabbed the pink one in the side of the leg. Pinkie paused for just a moment, caught her breath, and then continued. “We found this weird thing outside the library and were wondering if you could take a look at it.”

    The pink pony spun her head around until her muzzle was tucked into her mane. After a few seconds of tussling and squeaking, her cranial parts returned to staring at Zecora, this time with the transparent bag holding the dart. Zecora was stoic as the item in question made its way from Pinkie's mouth to her outstretched hoof. “It was in the grass under the balcony. We don't know what it is, but...”

    “It is a blowgun needle, and recently fired.” Zecora leaned her head closer. Her gaze locked onto the tiny red splotches along the needle tip. “And the consequences may be most dire.”

    “A...blowgun?” Blueblood tilted his head. “Is this like that commoner thing where you chew up paper, stick it on a straw, and blow so hard that it hits your teacher in the eye and you end up in detention for two weeks?” There was just long enough of a pause for Pinkie to wince and the colt to shift uncomfortably. “Er...it was Orange Peel's idea.”

    Zecora chuckled. “A crude comparison, but it shall do the trick. And a needle can do much with just a prick. It can be coated with such poison so deep, that its victim might fall into a deep sleep.”

    There were many ways to take that last word, but whether Zecora meant it to be literal or metaphorical did not matter. “It's kind of important that we find out what this green stuff is,” said Pinkie. “I'm pretty sure ponies don't leak green. Unlesssss you're really sick, but I'm pretty sure this didn't hit where that stuff comes from.”

    Blueblood grimaced. Please forget about that. Don't let that image into your brain. No, stop thinking about it. No No No No No NO NONONONONONONO! He gagged and rolled his eyes as the image of a puking (or worse) pony was forever burned onto his regal and impressionable mind.

    And second, Seattle Seahawks...

    10 comments · 329 views
  • 8w, 21h
    I think I'm done

    I've reached my breaking point. I'm sick of all this.

    Sorry to let you all down. But that's what I've always done, isn't it?

    25 comments · 521 views
  • 8w, 1d
    Comic Review: Issue #27 (The Revenge of Everfree, Part 1)

    Another month, another comic. With Friends Forever getting off to a good start, can the main series deliver?


    Our story begins with the Mane 6 enjoying a picnic, only for it to be interrupted by Zecora fleeing from a mass of vines and a pair of timberwolves. Turns out the Everfree Forest is growing out of control, which means that Discord has corrupted the Tree of Harmony and...wait, I'm looking at the script for “Princess Twilight Sparkle.” This time, they have to look for the “Heart of the Forest,” a being that has never been mentioned before and completely contradicts the notion that the Everfree Forest is supposed to actually obey natural laws.

    So our heroes set forth, where they discover a deer fawn named Bramble. This is soon followed by a grown deer named Blackthorn, and finally by King Aspen, the leader of the deer, ruler of the deer city of Thicket, and the Heart of the Forest itself. Turns out the Everfree Forest is being chopped down by a minotaur and his pony construction team to make room for a theme park, and the deer are using their nature-controlling potions to spread the forest outwards across Equestria in retaliation. Why?

    Because the deer are in touch with nature, unlike those awful, evil, polluting, non-nature loving ponies.

    The deer are goddamn elves.

    If you've ever touched stock fantasy, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Every single deer in this issue is a condescending, arrogant asshole who take every opportunity to belittle the Mane 6 for not being in harmony with the forest or bullcrap like that. They have this wonderful, mystical city with a strict “no outsiders” policy, and when initial negotiations with the minotaur head of the project fails, they decide the best course of action is a scorched earth policy against the ponies as “tit for tat.” Sure, they say they sent messengers to Celestia, but when there was no response, did any of the deer, I don't know, go in person to speak to the ponies' ruler and find out why nothing was happening? Nope, those ponies are just so arrogant, unlike us perfect deer.

    And if you believe this is a measured response to an intrusion into their homeland, they're also implied to be attacking Canterlot. You know, that city high in the mountain that has nothing to do with what's going on? Aspen's a dick.

    Oh, and don't think the minotaur boss gets off scot-free. He's essentially a Captain Planet villain that talks about how awesome parking lots and amusement parks are, and how he can't stop because PROGRESS! The only redeeming feature of his involvement is that the workers are just portrayed as regular folks doing their job; if this was a Captain Planet episode, they'd all be laughing along about how much fun it is to pollute and destroy nature for no reason other than because they're dicks.

    As you've probably surmised, they're going for an environmentalism moral this time, and while I agree that protecting our environment is important, this is a topic that you really have to be watchful when you write; otherwise, you'll just come across like you're browbeating the audience, like this issue does. Just as an example, Bramble calls the ponies monsters because Twilight tore down a tree to cross a chasm, which would displace the non-sapient animals nesting inside. Note that Bramble, at no point, offers to help the ponies cross. Twilight was not willfully evicting the animals, nor was she trying to chuck them into the chasm; heck, she probably could have just popped that tree back up the minute they got across. And before this point, the ponies had to cut down several trees to create a barricade against angry monsters that wanted to feast on their flesh; they even found Bramble while he was crying over “those poor trees.”

    Bramble values a tree over the lives of the thinking, feeling, loving ponies.

    But of course they deserve it, because they've ignorant ponies who don't know how precious nature is. He even tells Aspen (who's his dad, by the by) to listen to the Mane 6...and then throw them out, thereby indicating that he doesn't give a real crap what they have to say. Screw you, Bramble. I hope someone makes venison out of you.

    There are some amusing moments, such as Pinkie's “Go Team Pony!” sign, the frazzled Pinklestia doll, and the explanation of where Celestia and Luna are (they're tied up by vines again). But overall, this issue fills me with a deep loathing. It doesn't perform character assassination like the last arc, where Twilight valued a historical site over the lives of ponies, but the incredibly forced message and the arrogance of the deer derails the story for me. The next issue better make up for this.

    10 comments · 200 views
  • 8w, 3d
    Okay...

    Can we cut it out with the death threats? Please?

    I don't care who did what to someone. I don't care what causes someone supports or what stupid things they have said. There is no reason to wish death on someone. It's not some stupid, harmless joke on the Internet. I have people calling in and threatening to kill me or my coworkers every damn day because of our job. I've had people threaten to assassinate the governor because their insurance carrier is taking too long to process some paperwork. I can't publicly acknowledge where I work for fear of someone kicking my ass or trying to gun me down.

    Do I soldier on? As much as I can, but when you're bombarded with the shit, it's not a pleasant experience. I know that nobody that calls in threatening to plant bombs on our cars or run us over in the parking lot is likely to follow through, but that doesn't eliminate the fear that some day, one person will be crazy enough and driven enough to do just that.

    Death threats are not jokes, especially when they're told behind the anonymity the Internet provides. Anyone who says they're going to kill someone because they said or did something they didn't like could actually be dead serious, and nobody will listen because it's drowned in a sea of "tough guys" who want to look bigger than they really are.

    The Internet is, as a whole, a cruel and disgusting place...and that's supposed to be a good thing?

    26 comments · 413 views
  • 8w, 5d
    A year ago, I made a promise

    I said that the next chapter of Waning Moon would not take a year.

    It's still barely started, and it's been almost a year.

    I'm a liar.

    Still working on it. That's the truth.

    14 comments · 213 views
  • 10w, 3d
    Comic Review: Friends Forever #12 (Rarity and Babs Seed)

    Welcome to our first MLP comic of 2015, aka the only thing I do anymore. This time, we have a most unusual pairing, as Rarity finds herself spending time with bully-turned-good pony Babs Seed. Will friendship bloom between the generations?


    Rarity has once again been summoned by Sapphire Shores to provide her fashion expertise, this time in Manehatten. Sweetie Belle is just as excited as ever to be accompanying her big sister, but her happiness so offends the Narrative Gods that they smite her with an ear infection the morning they were supposed to leave. Now that she has to stay home (and can't even stand up without falling over; seriously, do ear infections do that to horses?), Rarity goes it alone, and is just finishing up her designs when somepony shows up.

    This somepony turns out to be Babs. The filly was going to accompany the two during the trip, but now that Sweetie Belle's out, she's lost her anchor for the whole activity. The sight of a downtrodden little pony is too much for even Rarity's professionalism to bear, and she agrees to spend some time in Manehatten with Babs. Unfortunately, the two have very different interests. Can they find a way to enjoy themselves?

    The issue goes over much of the same ground as “Sisterhooves Social.” Once again, we have Rarity as the uptight, fashion-obsessed, controlling member of the group, and Babs as the more tomboyish foal whose authority figure just doesn't get it. The story is about the two realizing that they need to compromise and work things out in order to get along, and finally start enjoying each other's company. The major difference is that Sweetie Belle is Rarity's sister, and Rarity's involvement with Babs is limited to watching her sister try to murder her (she even brings up the float incident) and helping to clear Trixie's name in a previous issue of the main comic. Neither of those appearances really had the two interacting; even in the latter, Babs deferred to Applejack or Trixie. This different relationship helps move the plot away from being a retread (see almost every Applejack or Fluttershy story ever) and into something more enjoyable.

    Garbowska's art, while still not my favorite, fits the tone of the comic well. There are some art hiccups (Rarity's glasses disappear and reappear between panels), but the softer style is quite a good match for what is essentially a more grounded character piece.

    Like all things, though, the story ends with a roller derby. I know nothing of the sport, nor do I have any real drive to learn, but it has been canon in the universe since “Call of the Cutie” back in Season One, so it's doesn't feel out of place. Naturally, the roles are now reversed; Rarity is completely clueless as to what's going on, while Babs is enraptured with the spectacle. All of this leads into the nice moral: people can have different tastes and interests than you, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun with them regardless, and that you should ask them what they would like to do instead of forcing them to do what you enjoy. It's cliché, but it works fine in this instance.

    Plus, Cadance is apparently roaming the roller derby underground as “Shining Harmer.” Plus, there was a Frozen reference. Can't we all just le-

    No, I'm not doing that one. That meme is too tired for even my tastes.

    Overall, this was a simple issue, but a fun one nonetheless.


    Next time, Spike takes the spotlight once again...and find himself saddled with Princess Luna as they try to handle a dragon problem.

    5 comments · 207 views
  • 10w, 5d
    Am I dead?

    No. Stuff is coming. Didn't get it done this weekend like I had intended, but at least I can finally get the next chapter of Waning Moon done and stop having nightmares about the lot of you hunting me down and killing me.

    ...I may be a zombie, though. I have had a hankering for some brains...

    5 comments · 171 views
  • 12w, 2d
    2014 is almost over

    At long last, this crappy year will be behind us, and another will be staring us down. And as the final hours tick away in the Pacific time zone, I would like to say, I'm sorry I let you all down this year. Like I did last year. Not 2012, that was a decent one, but these last two years especially.

    Here's to 2015. Please let it be better.

    6 comments · 148 views
  • 13w, 11h
    A Chance Encounter Chapter 5 follow-up

    Well, it's over. Two years ago, I promised to finish this, and two computers, two addresses, and millions of vanilla Cokes later, I did it. Sorry it took so long. There are a couple of reasons:

    A) This was a story started by another author, and I always hate picking those up. It fills me with a sense of dread continuing where someone (particularly another fan) left off, as if I was ruining their perfect work with my accursed presence. The planned synopsis I got for the story was pretty much discarded or ran through after Chapter Four, so I had to come up with a completely new ending for the fifth. (Or rather, I had the ending in mind and discussed it with several other Lunaverse authors beforehand, and then had to figure out how to get to it.)

    B) One of the reasons I took this story up was because it gave me a chance to...cleanse myself of feelings towards L!Twilight. If you want a nice breakdown of my seething rage, check out my old review of "Boast Busted." There were two issues: first, I couldn't fix Twilight, as RDD was handling her redemption and I couldn't step on his toes. Second, when the story fell behind because of real life and computer woes, RDD had to go and create the overall lackluster "Crisis on Two Equestrias," which marked L!Twilight's turn from antagonist to secondary character and rendered everything I had planned redundant.

    C) ZEEEECOOOORAAAAA!!! I regret ever attempting to write for her, ever. Rhyming is not my thing, and having to translate what I want her to say into a rhyme is nearly impossible. God help you if you actually care enough to keep her to the same rhythm she has in the show; I know I certainly didn't care anymore by the end. All I wanted to do was have her beat up Twilight and betray her oldest friend in the series. Is that so wrong?

    Something that I did add on to Zecora's character was her extreme reaction to ponies insulting her culture's religion. It's been established that zebras are sun-worshipers, which is something that common L!ponies find abhorrent. In "Helping Hands," Lyra was horrified at the idea of praising the sun until Trixie pointed out that it didn't mean they worshiped Corona. And Zecora was Corona's minion, so she's also a sun-worshiper. She has greater goals than Corona taking over Equestria, mind, but she's also not a big fan of L!Equestria as a whole. Excusing the fact that they banished the pony in charge of moving the sun (albeit after she went crazy because Luna is better being a ruler is hard), they've also all but outlawed anything gold, have a cultural taboo towards being exposed to sunlight during noon, and treat the big ball of flaming gas as if it were the actual devil.

    This was a leftover parcel from my plan for the minotaurs, where they hailed from a small island, were deeply involved in commerce, and tended to view life as a competition they could only win by being the greatest at their chosen field and doing a hundred sit-reps every six hours. Oh, and they're sun-worshipers, too. The framework for the story that will never be is that a movement of minotaurs is demanding that the government side with Corona...because a noblepony was an hour late to an important negotiation with one of the most powerful minotaurs out there because they wanted to avoid the noon sun, thereby insulting the minotaur's faith and ruining his schedule, which ended up costing the entire nation hundreds of millions. In addition, there's the whole thing about ponies not using gold; since most other races still use it, the minotaurs have nothing but trouble dealing with exchange rates between gold and silver whenever they do business with Equestria, to the point where valuable deals and alliances are lost because they just don't have the time to work out the proper ratios and the freaking ponies won't take any gold.

    Most of that is now meaningless as a different direction was taken for the minotaurs (a better one, mind), but Zecora still fit the mold. In her eyes, the ponies of Equestria are insulting her and her race every time they treat the sun as Hell. She's still cautious enough to check her tongue, but after a day of dealing with Twilight, having the exasperating know-it-all casually insult her would be too much for anyone. I have no idea if this will stick (the wonders of a shared universe), but it's my interpretation, at any rate.

    And then there's Spike. I can't discuss what happens to him without giving away some major spoilers (besides, RDD is handling that story), but I will say that the two joining up was never in the cards for this story. I had considred having Twilight go with Spike until he reached the resting spot for the migration, but that just felt superfluous. I couldn't have the little guy run off alone, either. So a dragon comes out of the sky, picks him up, and carries him off to meet his destiny. And Twilight is forever alone, as it should be.

    There was one other scene that was cut, mostly because it would have involved more Zecora and I was not up to that anymore. Corona would have seen Spike leaving with the Great Dragon Migration, and while she's peeved that Zecora failed, she sees this as an opportunity to get all of the dragons in Equestria on her side. Zecora, meanwhile, would have had a bit of redemption thrown in as she contemplates her friend's departure, and wishes him good luck. One of the things that has stuck around is that Zecora has another, more noble goal in mind in helping Corona, but she can't reveal what it is without setting off her boss or possibly giving the heroes a lead. If that means entrapping her friend, so be it.

    I don't know if I'll write any more Lunaverse after finishing "Eye of the Hurricane," but I will say that if I kept writing, I'd want Zecora to be someone who's basically good, but is so devoted to her end goal that she's willing to do terrible things to accomplish it. She would have her realization moment near the end of Season Two, just in time for Corona's time to end and the third season (which will never happen) to begin.

    In any case, I've finished this twisted tale. See you next time.

    3 comments · 271 views
  • 13w, 2d
    It's over

    Finally finished it. I hate Zecora more than you will ever know. Enjoy the worst version of her ever. I shall be soothing my agony with eggnog.

    10 comments · 284 views
  • 13w, 3d
    Comic Review: Issue #25/26

    Giddyup, partners! It's time to look at a Wild West adventure staring our favorite pony gals! Can they stop a band of desperadoes from taking over...

    I can't do this. These issues piss me off too much. Let's just air the grievances and be done with it.


    Our story begins with the Mane 6 arriving into the town of Canter Creek, where Applejack's Great-Granduncle Chili Pepper has a farm. Unfortunately, the town is under siege by a band of cattle rustlers (literal cows that ride on goats), and they have their eyes on the farm. Why? Well, it was supposed to be because there was treasure on it, but like Chili Pepper himself, that plot point apparently disappeared; now they're doing it just because they're jerks. Can our heroes save the day?

    Let's get what little good there is out of the way. Both issues have some good gags and funny moments. Pinkie Pie nearly bursting into flames from eating a ghost pepper (and then asking for more), Rarity hitting on the sherriff, and Twilight using the power of bureaucracy to screw with the baddies all got a laugh out of me. There's also a nice framework here for a story, one that frankly deserves to be better told. Art's not bad, either.

    Now for what really pisses me off, and it's the thing I complained about last month: Twilight Sparkle won't do anything. Sure, she'll participate in the zany schemes, but when asked to just zap the villains that are assaulting her citizens and causing wanton destruction, she does nothing. Why? Because the cattle rustlers are her citizens, too, and she can't use her magic to hurt her own subjects. This is stupid on many, many levels; so many, in fact, that I cannot fathom how anyone thought it was a good excuse.

    Even worse than that, though, is the ultimate payoff. While the Mane 6 are busy relocating the cattle rustlers off the ranch property in order to show that they aren't living on it anymore (which makes no sense in any legal capacity), she has Princess Celestia declare the ranch a historical site, meaning that it belongs to the community as a whole and not the desperadoes. The gang's leader responds by destroying the barn (which he burned down only an issue prior), and since that's a historical site, he and his gang can now be rounded up using Twilight's magic.

    So let's get this straight. Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship, will gladly imprison anypony that attacks a landmark...but if you're being beaten to death on the street, she'll just walk on by because she won't harm one of her citizens. If the idea was that the cattle rustlers hadn't technically broken any laws until then (and that feels like what they were going for), last time I checked extortion, assault, and arson were all far more serious crimes than destroying a landmark, and these steers were doing all of that even before this arc began.

    And this wouldn't be that bad if the comic didn't call specific attention to this fact. Twilight standing by and watching a town die is a major plot point. If it wasn't brought up, people would have complained, but it would have mostly been fan comments and problems; turning it into the centerpiece of your story arc (one that heavily advertised Applejack, who ends up not having much of a role other than serving as an excuse to get the ponies over there) magnifies the issue so many times over that it brings the whole thing crashing down.

    This was a bad arc, plain and simple. It's up there with the Bookworm in terms of how annoying and dumb it is. I'm just glad it's over.


    Next time, more fun from the Everfree Forest.

    11 comments · 210 views
  • 14w, 2d
    Serious talk

    Grab your serious chair and let's discuss some things.

    So, we have the breaking news of a brony's suicide. Like nearly all suicides, this is definitely tragic, especially when you consider his age and the circumstances leading up to it. And yet, there is a natural cycle to these things. The first several dozen comments will be the usual condolences of sorrow and grief. These will then be followed by comments stating that the deceased should have known better than to listen to trolls on the Internet and gone outside. In the end, the latter will occupy the conversation, to the point where the person who was once pitied is again an object of ridicule.

    There is definite truth in saying that someone should know better than to rely on the Internet for socialization. You can't spend your whole life in front of a computer screen and expect to lead a long, healthy existence. Humans are naturally social creatures, and learning how to operate within society is a major part of maturing and becoming a better and wiser person. But at the same time, many of these comments feel like they minimize one of the worst things the Internet has brought to us: anonymity.

    Back in the day, if you said that someone sucked, you would have to know of them in some meaningful way, or be close enough for them to punch your face in. Nowadays, you can call someone anything you want from anywhere, and all they will see is a username, if even that much. Facebook and other social media have made this even easier. There is a real ugliness to what is shown on the Internet, and just saying that it's a part of the deal isn't going to cut it.

    And with how tech-dependent our world is becoming, how much longer can the old adage of, "Go outside," apply? I have a computer at my apartment. I have another at work. My iPhone is a portable computer, as is my tablet. I am essentially plugged in at all times. So are many, many people in the world today. It's the way our society is beginning to turn.

    I guess what I'm saying is to be mindful. When you troll someone on the Internet, that is a real person on the other side. You have no idea what their life is like or where they're coming from. Show some basic decency and treat others as you would be treated. Seriously, Internet, it's time to grow up a bit.

    16 comments · 348 views
Feb
19th
2013

Today the Brony Documentary group released a trailer for the extended interviews bonus, with extra footage of Tara, De Lancie and Faust. Most of it's pretty much your basic stuff, but...watch what Faust says...

In case you're lazy, she says that she had planned out destinies for the different characters, and mentions Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Twilight specifically. The first two are self-explanatory: Rarity gets a dress shop in Canterlot and Rainbow Dash joins the Wonderbolts. Those are pretty blindingly obvious, and have been built up to over the course of the show. But then she gets to Twilight...who was going to be Celestia's successor. Yes, successor. As in, princess. She also tweeted after the hype machine kicked into gear that this wasn't in her plan, so that seems to imply that this would have happened at some point in time, but not in the middle of the series' run.

This actually adds credence to the idea that MMC was going to be the series finale. After all the staff turnover and with DHX picking up so many projects, Hasbro cuts their losses and orders thirteen episodes to fill out the sixty-five needed for syndication. That way, they can just sell the airing rights after the fact and make a fortune. But when the show remained popular (and possibly because shows like Care Bears didn't take off like they had wanted), they decided to renew it for another full season. The only problem is that this meant MMC was already in production, and it would most likely be too late and too expensive to pull the episode and totally redo the ending.

So what does this actually mean? Not much, really, but it does give some more insight into the show's conception. And perhaps it can show that Hasbro isn't wrecking Faust's vision like so many claim they are.

InsertAuthorHere · 4,185 views · Report
#1 · 109w, 4d ago · · 2 ·

Uhm... okai... not sure what to say...

#2 · 109w, 4d ago · 2 · 15 ·

Twilight replace Celestia.....this just in: Twilight Sparkle new worst pony.

#3 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

:c

#4 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

This new info and the current state of affairs... it could still happen. o_o

#5 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

Now I think about it, it explains the wierd ending off Wonderbolts Academy. If season 3 would be the last season and everypony off the mane 6 would get their dreams, then Wonderbolts Academy could be one off the episodes about Dash getting her dream. At the end Dash would be accepted as Wonderbolt.

This maybe also explains the remors before season 3 about Flutters changing in a dragon and Rarity getting a duet with Octavia. Flutters changing in a dragon would help her overcome her fear of dragons and help her learn to stand for herself. Rarity meeting Octaia would almost certainly happen in Canterlot. It would help Rarity to get a shop opened in Canterlot.

#6 · 109w, 4d ago · 3 · ·

None of this really surprise me.  Twilight taking up a role as Celestia's successor has always to me seemed a very likely destination for her character arc -- either that or becoming the royal arch-mage/vizier, but now that she's an alicorn the former seems to be the only viable path, and it's not a bad path.

Now exactly how well this will play out over the course of next season (and however many more season might potentially come after that), well, only time will tell.

#7 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

So wait, this implies its our fault. We the fans got this so popular that it warranted MORE episodes and seasons! While Faust's original vision for the work was good, it wasn't multiseasonal enough for US.

This is very interesting. You know what? I would love to see her "fanfic" on the endings for our characters the way she had intended.

#8 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

It's been heavily speculated that the reason this season was thirteen episodes, or one half, was so the other half would go to funding Equestria Girls, and that it never had anything to do with the syndication limit at all. Hasbro knows that ponies is pretty much the life blood right now, so they are broadening their horizons and syndicating FIM for the future.

As for the video itself, a bit surprising given Lauren's reaction on Twitter. Sure, she was never expecting Twilight to actually become royalty herself, but replacing the ruler of the entire kingdom is pretty much becoming royalty, anyway.

So yeah, "ruining Faust's vision?" No, not really.

More like broadening it out while keeping both corporate parties (Toy branch vs Show branch) happy.

#9 · 109w, 4d ago · 1 · 1 ·

It means that we really are in a Babylon 5 - style scenario, looking forward to a season of fillers, hastily-conceived plots and episodes from the scrap pile.

FWIW, I'm hoping that Rainbow and Rarity both reject their automatically-assumed 'destinies'.  It would fit well into the message of the show if they decide that their relationships with their friends and their places in the community in Ponyville was more important to them than celebrity, recognition and even wealth.  "I'm happy here, with my friends.  Money and fame couldn't replace that!" would be a nice message with which to round out the show.

#10 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

Yeah, that is interesting.  Perhaps if we had known this two weeks ago, a lot less people would've freaked out..  (By the way, did you know that kludge is a word?  Because autocorrect seems to want to replace every other word I type with that today.)

#11 · 109w, 4d ago · 7 · ·

So everyone saying Lauren Faust didn't want Twilight to be a princess can shut it? (Sorry, I get more than a little tired of people using her to justify their own arguments.) Huzzah!

#12 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

As long as this burns hundreds of fanfics, then I'm okay with it. :twilightsheepish:

#13 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

What I want to know is how they're going to pull themselves out of this hole they accidentally dug. If they did, like you said, intend for the show to end there, but renewed the show for another season due to unexpected popularity, they've got to find some way to keep it going, right? If they're creative, I'm sure they can find a decent way to prevent hitting a dead end.

#14 · 109w, 4d ago · 4 · ·

...

...

...

...

HAH! Sorry, that was mean wasnt it to all of the people who say "messing with Lauren's vision" and "Hasbro is teh dvil," and "Princesses are just pwetty and historically dont do anything (princess Grace, Diania, and Catherine just got DISSED! Though I thank them for giving me the chance to research the real princesses in the real world and see what they did for real and their real lives)? So basically, what we have on our hands is another "DBZ, Kim Possible" scenario where something that was only meant for a particular length (Dragonball was only meant to go for the first arc, and KP was meant for only the 65) and then it got so popular that they decided to keep things going. I wonder if that is another reason for the 13, so Megan and the group could set up an arc  and plot things out slowly to get everything set up. Meanwhile Hasbro goes for the spin off that they want.

My question is this then...Die hard fans, where were you when Danny Phantom was canceled? Why was I stuck with only 3 seasons, 53 eps, and two awesome made for tv movies? Why didnt you save this show? Heck, Hey Armold fans...where were you guys when Nick decided to be the biggest A-holes on the planet and left us the world's second biggest cliffhanger (first place belongs to the always awesome and rewatchable...Berserk). Some of these shows need closure

#15 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

she wants the CMC to get their cutie marks, and they didnt, a thing that will happen in season 4? :trixieshiftright::trixieshiftleft::rainbowdetermined2::duck:

#16 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

On the subject of destinies, I've made a blog post of my own.

I notice someone down-thumbed my previous post.  I'd be grateful if whoever that was could tell me (by private message if you prefer) what you didn't like; I'm genuinely interested in your opinion, okay?

#17 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

>>846166

I'd be okay with that, more Scootaloo is never a bad thing :twilightsmile:

#18 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

>>846235

they just annoy me now because we have seen them do their talents in many episodes and sweetie belle straight out says that even if she is a good singer she refuses to think its her special talent and tries to be like her big sister, you wont get the same cutie mark as your sister, the show shows that nopony can have the same talent, and all of the older ponies know their talents as well, but they arent allowed to tell them because they have to find it on their own, but they wont ever find it on their own if they keep listening to scootaloo trying to get a cutie mark like rainbowdash. I like them, and find them funny, but i dont like how they refuse to acknolodge that their special talent is what they refused to do for the talent show.

#19 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

i will still regard this the s3 season finale as the actual finale when this show finally ends. the fact that twilight suddenly gets wings when i skip this episode before s4 we will solve when we get there.

#20 · 109w, 4d ago · · 8 ·

>>845936

Sorry, Luna's already taken that spot.

#21 · 109w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

>>846007

Possibly, or possibly not. The problem with Babylon 5 was that everything was resolved before the sudden renewal, while here, there's still a lot of ground to possibly cover. And in any case, it's kind of hard to have filler when your show is more of less slice of life, the very definition of filler.

Also, the idea you had for Rarity was kind of what happened in "Sweet and Elite." She goes to Canterlot, makes some huge waves thanks to a high-profile pony falling in love with her work, and feels she has to lie about her friends and origin to avoid being cast out. In the end, she learns that you should always be proud of where you're from. If the show had ended, that could have been a decent ending for her.

>>845988

More like broadening it out while keeping both corporate parties (Toy branch vs Show branch) happy.

It also ties into the claim made back in Season 2 that the show's creators had input on the toys. Although given how rushed the finale was, it's also possible that the change was still mandated, but since they still had Lauren's idea lying around, they decided to work that interpretation into the finale as best they could. It's honestly a shame they couldn't devote the entire episode to it, but at least they'll be addressing what happens now in the next opener.

#22 · 109w, 4d ago · 3 · ·

>>845955

> it could still happen.

"Only on the Hub"?

Sorry, I couldn't resist :facehoof:

#23 · 109w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

I never understood the argument that "this isnt what Faust wanted!". Honestly I dont really care what Faust wants since she isnt apart of production anymore and even if she was I would still judge each episode as I do now. Would be like saying Disney didnt follow George Lucas's vision in their new Star Wars movie. Regardless of if its a flop of success, I don't care what Lucas's vision was since he isnt a part of it.

This info does give us some insight into Hasbro's thinking and I guess that does make me a little less angry. Though I am still way more disappointed than angry. I've been back to watch the songs of that episode several times and the greatest crime is wasting such perfect material and plot with such a convoluted episode. I would have rather them shot for an average episode and just it ending up below average than to have all these amazing scenes and touching moments wasted because of time constraints. Now every time I watch Twilights "I've got to find a way", the groups "A true true friends" or "Celestias  ballad", I can't completely enjoy them because all I can think about is what might have been.

#24 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

>>846543

That isn't an exact analogy as Mr Lucas is supposedly going to be a story consultant on Episode VII (hopefully he'll convince J J Abrams not to turn the entire cast into hormonal teens).

Still, I do get your point; Lauren hasn't really be involved with MLP: FiM since the end of Season 2 and has only ever been credited with writing episodes 1x01 and 1x02, the pilot two-parter.  Although it still owes a lot to her vision, it's a lot bigger show now with a lot more different creative visions involved.

#25 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

Hey look a Faust Tweet

#26 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

>>846625 uh the heck is that a comment to?.....

#27 · 109w, 4d ago · · ·

>>846663 in reference to it 'Not being so far from Fausts vision'

#28 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

>>846675 no i mean what is faust commenting about? all that link shows is a blank da page with her post on it.....

#29 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

>>846692 ... What could the "Almighty Faust" be talking about when she says that? :facehoof: Especially so soon after we get a 4'th alicorn. Especially knowing she doesn't approve of Cadence being an Alicorn

#30 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

>>846725 but that post was dated a year ago , and i didn't know anything on what faust had to say about cadence.....

#31 · 109w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

Personally i never was a fan of "Destiny". but i do believe that people can only go so far with their free will.

Meaning that because ones cutie mark is one thing, why does that mean they are tied to doing it?

It understandable if, per say a pony is a singer, or a baseball player, that they would be best doing what they do best, but what about if it isnt, like why can't ponies have free choice?

The thing im hitting at is mainly the royal guard. Does it mean that all of the royal guards are practically aryans, born and raised to guard the princess like roman storm troopers? or could they be stallions who had tallent, and careers, but they decided to join the military?

I remember one of my favorite stories of all time is a cup of joe by the Descendant, in it, Pony Joe was a soldier in the equestrian aremy and became a royal guard and then dcided to open his doughnut shop with the money he earned.

still though, cutiemarks related to fighting and killing by fanfiction writers are immediately poor characters in my opinnion. THink outside the box, there are ways to rationalize it.

#32 · 109w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

>>847030 I kind of view destiny in stories a lot like I do love; I don't believe in either of them, but in order for the story to make sense you have to pretend that they exist...well, most of the time, at least :pinkiesick:

#33 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

You continue to post interesting things, I'm glad I follow you.  :twilightsmile:

#34 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

You know I'm still confused at this prospect of hating on princesses and calling them weak, and yet the show has Luna and Celestia around! That makes little sense!

#35 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

Well, I hope they realize how stupid it would be to cancel the show at this point. With the fans it has produced and the money they make off of it, why would they stop it and pray that care bears is going to somehow replace it?

#36 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

Good to know, thanks!

#37 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

>>845933

I'm not sure either really, I'm still absorbing this... wow...

#38 · 109w, 3d ago · · ·

>>846007

>>846536

interesting that 2 other people would bring up Babylon 5, but that's exactly what I'm reminded of too.

Babylon 5 was a sci-fi TV series about a space station called Babylon 5.

Near the end of the show, they blew up the space station.

So there was no more Babylon 5, and everybody's plots were pretty much resolved, it was supposed to be the end of the story.

......and then the show was picked up for another season - and it was terrible.

I'm not saying that's where MLP will go, Babylon 5 was a serial TV drama and MLP is a kids show about candy colored ponies.

MLP can be different, this doesn't have to be an "endgame" story for it.

This show isn't even the kind of thing that even has an "ending", it's more like any episodic cartoon show and it just runs until there is no longer any interest in it. Like Family Guy or The Simpsons, they just get into something new next week .

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