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    5,560 words · 110 views  ·  3  ·  1
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  • 88w, 6d
    Volgrand's reviews: Past Sins

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  • 89w, 6d
    Hello, Fimfiction!

    I discovered this web some time ago, but I have just decided to register. As I plan to start writing soon, I think it would be 20 percent cooler if I present myself first.

    I'm Volgrand, an spanish brony who lives in England. I work as a nurse, and I spend my free time writing (both original stories and fanfiction), playing/composing music, studying, and some more things I don't feel like mentioning right now.

    Some time ago I started writing a Fimfiction in spanish called "Hermanas de la tormenta" (Sisters of the storm) which is hosted in fanfiction.net.  I'm planning to translate it to english, so you can enjoy my wonderful story (modesty? what's that, some kind of asian dish?) and also to practice my written english.

    So, wait for some news about me soon. I hope you will enjoy what I write, and also I hope to learn a lot from your comments and critics.

    Best!

    0 comments · 35 views
Feb
16th
2013

SPOILERS ALERT! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!

If you want to read this, first watch the season 3 chapter 13.


Seriously, today's chapter was the worst of the whole show. And it was a seson finale! If I  value any other chapter an average 7 out of 10, this one mark would be a 3.

First of all: Ok, a musical chapter. That's awesome! I mean, I like a lot the songs in MLP.

But let's focus on the plot, as it is... well.... terrible.

Ok, Twilight wakes up very happy, singing because it is going to be a good day. A nice song, it made me smile. But she founds, suddenly, that Rarity has Rainbow's cutie mark. She tries to control the weather because it's her destiny, it's what her cutie mark says.

That's a horrible lesson to any kid! "You have a destiny you have to obey", "do what you must and not what you want" is the lesson behind this scene? Bravo Hasbro & The Hub, bravo. Twiligh then runs to any other of her friends and finds the same problem. And, when she sees they are suffering, what would she do? Would she rush to search in her library for a cure?

NO!!

Instead she goes to her room to cry. What? Is that the same Twilight I know? The Twilight I know would start searching inmediatly for a solution. Would fight anything at the moment for her friends, and if she was unable, she would contact the Princess asking for help. BUT NO! She goes and cries in a super-sad-and-depressing song. Because it was her fault for an spell she did the last buking night. And, as it doesn't have a counterspell, she decides to ground herself. WHAT THE HAY!?

But well, she goes out of the room (finally) and, with a burst of magic, she figures out the cure. Genius! She just had to make her friends do what they really do, and everything got fixed alone. DEUX EX MACHINA! Who needs a self-discovering adventure so they all recover their true essences in the world? Why would you fight for your own destiny when it is already marked in your very soul?

Oh well, some more songs, they come back to the library, Twilight finishes the spell... it activates the elements and Twilight is sent to another plane of existence. She meets Celestia and she tells her that she had been always observing her from there, with a lot of 2-d videos that would fit in the damn universe of MATRIX, but not in My little pony!

Celestia, you damn Voyeur!! We are lucky Twilight never had a very special somepony, or the fanficts would explode in clopping Celestias!

Well, it is probably going to happen, anyway.

And oh, look, Twilight HAS TO BECOME A PRINCESS BECAUSE IT IS HER DESTINY.  Celestia didn't even think if she WANTED to? Did Twilight think what it would suppose to her friendship to become a princess? Did she even care on what changes would it suppose to her life? NO! NO ONE DID! Because it is her destiny. Because what you feel doesn't matter as long as you fulfill your destiny!

BULLSHIT!!

Personally I saw since the 1st chapter of season 3 -The Crystal Empire- that Celestia was preparing Twilight to become a princess. But I was expecting something very different! A self-discovery lesson, a good adventure matching to the defeat of Discord, Chysalis or Nightmare Moon. BUT NOT THIS CRAP!

The original plot of the chapter could have been something GREAT. They could have extended it to 2 full chapters, in which Twilight would have learnt what Celestia had in mind for her, and she would have to decide to become an alicorn or not for herself.

But no. She had to obey her teacher blindly -that would be if Celestia did ever gave her that choice-. She had to accept with no doubts that her life was changed forever, because now she was a bucking princess. Oh wait, let's care about friendship with a lame speech at the end! Oh look, I'm Twilight and suddenly I feel confortable talking in front of some thousands of ponies!

SERIOUSLY! Chrysalis being in love with... I don't know... Lyra would be less OOC than this Twilight!

And in the end we sing. "Everything's gonna be allright in Equestria". Because she is suddenly a princess and she doesn't even think that her life is going to change. Or even worse, maybe her life will not change at all and she will keep being a librarian. Or that from this moment anyone of her decissions is going to affecto the fate of a whole kingdom. Who cares? Everything it's gonna be allright, let's sing, because now the whole Canterlot will sing with me!

Horrible plot development, horrible timing, horrible decissions, horrible lessons.

Once I did read a fanfict shipping Discord with Gummy that had a better plot.

Damn, I need a beer.

Volgrand · 257 views · Edited 87w, 4d ago · Report
#1 · 87w, 4d ago · · ·

It begins.

#2 · 87w, 4d ago · · ·

>>835784 the end of the series or the shitstorm? In both cases, eeeyup :eeyup:

#3 · 57w, 21h ago · · ·

Very late, I know...

Nice rant, I can relate. So, now, where is that Discord-Gummy-Shipfic? I am really not into shipping, but that sounds odd enough to be interesting.

#4 · 52w, 3d ago · · ·

>>836262

You might have left the fandom because of the season 3 finale, but I heard Season 4 eps 1 and 2 are actually parts 2 and 3 - continuing the story started in the season 3 finale.

I predict this is going to return Twilight back to being a regular unicorn.

The entire premise of Twilight is "Canterlot girl who prefers making friends in Ponyville." Season 3 arguably transforms her BACK into a "Canterlot girl."

The whole season finale of season 3 was about a "transform your destiny" spell... which Twilight SUCCESSFULLY casts at the end.

I predict Twilight is given the responsibility of moving the sun, she botches it, and Discord has to save the day.

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